


The Night is Darkest Before the Dawn

by CrescentMoonRising



Series: The Night is Darkest Before the Dawn [2]
Category: Actor RPF, Benedict Cumberbatch - Fandom, British Actor RPF, Real Person Fiction, Tom Hiddleston - Fandom, Tom Hiddleston RPF, benedict cumberbatch rpf - Fandom
Genre: Be Careful What You Wish For, F/M, Jealousy, Long-Distance Relationship, Love Confessions, NSFW, Separation, broken relationship, do i love him or not, makeup artist, past relationship, war horse - Freeform
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-09-07
Updated: 2015-09-15
Packaged: 2018-02-16 13:05:14
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 21
Words: 95,526
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2270793
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/CrescentMoonRising/pseuds/CrescentMoonRising
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Noelle Garguilo, an up-and-coming makeup artist, is thrilled to be given the chance to be a part of the makeup team for Steven Spielberg’s newest historical drama: War Horse.  While she knew that she should expect anything by working with her good friend Benedict Cumberbatch, she never dreamed of what would happen when she was introduced to his good mate and member of the cast: Tom Hiddleston.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> Chapter One is all about the first day of filming on War Horse in late August of 2010: the cast and crew prepare for the scene where Captain Nicholls leads the cavalry against the German front lines.

 

Sprinting through the muddy undergrowth, Noelle found the multitude of tents and trailers within the large plains.  Passing the horse corrals, she lost count of their number as she saw the sign for the makeup crew’s temporary home.  Lugging her silver case, she was dripping with sweat as she entered the tent.  She walked through most of her colleagues already setting up their stations.  

 

Even within the cool mists lifting across the large fields of North Hampshire, the warmth of late August was still within the air.  Noelle looked through the back of the tent towards the large hills where production was filming. Spread out over a mile radius, _War Horse_ had taken over the sleepy English countryside.  

 

_It would be my luck that the taxi would be late today._ She sighed as she found her way to her designated spot, just like all the others.  Each artist had a standard white vanity framed with “daylight” bulbs to match the brightness outside.  Each station had a matching directors chair-high enough to keep the artist's backs from breaking. She began taking each of her foundation bottles and jars out, and lined up her brushes for easy handling.  Her notepad held all the instructions for the various cast members, as they had been briefed the day before.  Save a couple of the actors who were to be aged, everyone was to look as young as possible.

 

“Ladies and gentlemen, I need your attention please.” The shrill voice echoed throughout the tent, as the twenty or so crew members stopped their actions. Noelle grabbed a tie and threw her hair into a bun on her head.

 

Polly, the head makeup director for the film, was running through a clipboard of notes. As she sauntered through the crew, she was analyzing over the stations to make sure they were to her liking. It was clear from pre-filming that she wanted order—in each area and within the crew themselves.

 

“Remember that we’re keeping the soldiers within the lightest area on the palettes.  It will reflect from the lighting, so make sure you keep shading to a minimum.  Understood?”

 

Everyone nodded with a few yes’es thrown in.  “Good, cast is coming in from first briefing and costumes as well.  Take a member and get them going.  The principals for this scene will be with Audrey and myself.”

 

Noelle continued getting her station set up when she heard her name called from behind her. She turned to find her superior; standing at attention with her clipboard in hand.  For a moment, she reminded Noelle of a school teacher taking the roll.  

 

“Noelle, dear.  It’s the first day, what would have caused you to be late for call this morning?”

 

Noelle should have known she couldn’t slip in without being noticed.  She was sure her name was mentioned around a few times by the other crew members.  She straightened up, placing a hand up to her chest in apology.

 

“I am so sorry Polly.  The taxi from my hotel ran late.  In truth, it was my fault I didn’t catch the buses with the other crew members.  I promise that it won’t happen again.”  

 

“Please see that it doesn’t, dear.”  She moved closer to speak between them, but every artist around them became suddenly quiet.  “I know things are rough for you, but don’t let it impact your position in this crew. Understood?”

 

Noelle swallowed hard, trying not to let the blush take over her entire face.  She nodded curtly and turned back to her post to finish up everything she needed.  She personalized the space with some historical photos she’d researched when she knew she landed the job.  She wanted a true feel of what the boys looked like as they were being shipped off to war, and most to their death.

 

She bent down to grab the last of her large round brushes but could not find it.  Suddenly it swung in front of her face as she felt a presence at her shoulder. A familiar voice spoke in a mock-whisper.

 

“Don’t look now, but I do believe we’re surrounded. They are strange looking invaders.  They have these fluffy appendages attached to themselves. I'll make the diversion, you run for the hills.”

 

Noelle flicked her eyes upwards to find a tall gentleman as he leaned casually against her.  A smile spread across her face, but she kept her head down to keep others from catching her response. 

 

With a hushed voice she hissed, “Keep it down, Benedict!  I already got in trouble once this morning; I don’t need to be reprimanded again.”

 

He moved his body away from her and grabbed another one of her brushes; methodically swiping it around his jutting cheekbones and prominent forehead.  He snickered under his breath, “Don’t tell me, darling girl. You were late, weren’t you?”  He didn’t look at her but she saw his reflection in the mirror, eyebrow raised disapprovingly towards her.

 

Sighing, she mumbled, “Yes, but only five minutes!”  

 

His eyebrow raised even higher towards her as she continued, “Don’t worry; I’ll make sure I have a call set for tomorrow morning.” After watching him dramatically flick the brush for the third time around his nose, she snatched it from his hand and tossed it on the counter.  

 

She finally stood to view him properly. He was clad in a t-shirt with some strange logo splashed across it and dark jeans. He looked ready for a lazy night at home than to be preparing for a major shooting session with Stephen Spielberg. She shook her head at his continual lack of fashion sense. She mused that at least when Olivia was home with him, she could direct him to wear things that were produced within the decade.

 

Polly came back around with Ashley, the second artist in-command, right behind her.  Ashley's dark curls framed her face, highlighting the harshness of her features. If Polly was your classical school teacher, Ashley was the Dean of Discipline. She gave Ben and Noelle a once-over before she crossed her arms in front of her chest.  Polly gave a look to Ben, her mouth twitching at the sides of her face.  

 

“Mr. Cumberbatch, Ashley will be working with you for your makeup and prosthetics.” She waved him towards her, eyeing Noelle again.

 

As they were about to disperse, a highly caffeinated assistant with an immense headset ran up to them. “Polly, there’s some confusion with the artists and handling of the horses.  They’re trying to fasten the braces that were ordered for the manes, but it’s just not working right now.”

 

She shook her head at him and snapped loudly, “We discussed this yesterday; this should not be an issue!”  She angrily turned around, looking for something to solve this grievous offense.  Not finding what she needed, Polly slapped her arms down onto her legs, anger boiling over.

 

“I see I am going to have to remedy this myself.  God forbid someone else step up and claim responsibility.”  She finally realized where she was and realized three people were staring at the head of makeup in the middle of a tantrum.  She snapped back in control and straightened herself.

 

“Ashley, please take Benedict to get started.  Noelle, have you begun working with any of the cast members yet?” 

 

Ben waved back to Noelle with two of his fingers as Ashley happily led him away. The two women were left alone.  Noelle’s stomach dropped, figuring she was in trouble once again.  Noelle chastised herself for not grabbing an actor right away. 

 

“No, Polly, I haven’t started anyone yet.  What can I do to help you?” She held her breath, awaiting her next admonishment.  

 

Polly took a long look at her and narrowed her eyes.  “Well, since you do have extensive experience…” She trailed off, making a decision in her mind, even punctuating it with a nod of her head.

 

“I have to handle this horse situation, so I am going to send the actor for Captain Nicholls over to you.  Just remember that he needs to look as young as possible. No lines, no darkness.  He is the focal point of the scene and it’s a huge moment.” 

 

Noelle nodded, “I got it Polly. He is in good hands.  I’ll make sure he’s finished before you get back.”  She smiled brightly to try and calm the fears of the older woman. 

 

Polly heard little as she was already looking over her clipboard.  She walked away mumbling about “working with damn horses” and being “asked to deal with issues beyond her title”.  

 

Noelle took in a deep breath and exhaled in relief. Glad she was out of trouble for the moment; she grabbed her notebook and looked over the photos of the costumes for the day.  Each actor who was in the scene would be wearing a dark green colored uniform with brown and gold accents. Large leather straps crossed their chests, highlighting their stature.  Noelle noted the matching hats each of the actors would be wearing, and how it would affect some of the lighting for the scenes.  

 

She was so engrossed in studying her notes, she never heard the sounds of feet shuffling towards her. 

 

After clearing his throat, the voice was light but questioning.  “Um, excuse me, Miss? I’m so sorry to bother you, but are you the person to help me with my makeup?”

 

Noelle's kept her head down, about to nod in the affirmative. However, her line of sight now had two legs that went on for miles.  She glanced upwards to the face attached to those legs to find a statuesque, blonde haired gentleman.  For a moment she was lost in his height, as well as his incredibly genial smile.  He looked serene with his large blue eyes.  

 

The uniform was stunning on him, whoever he was, and that was a miracle in itself.  She was staring far too long for comfort and she snapped up. 

 

Noelle's voice returned with a stutter, “Hi, um, are you playing Captain Nicholls?”

 

He blushed while dipping his head and his face exploded in a smile.  “Yes, I am. My name’s Tom.”

 

Noelle tossed the notebook onto the counter and grabbed a brush from the large pile.  She moved away from him and flourished her hand towards her chair.  

 

“Polly got called for an issue with the horses, so you’ll be working with me today. Please have a seat, I’ll get you ready and out there in no time.” Noelle realized she had been so nervous from the events of her morning; she had been unconsciously clenching her shoulders.  She smiled and could feel her arms relaxing. She felt comfort as she settled into her familiar role. 

 

"Yeah, I think everyone on the production team could hear her," he laughed. “If you ask me, the horses are even afraid of her."

 

Noelle's laughter prompted Tom to laugh even more.  Looking down, she began opening the powders she believed would match his tone.

 

"Something tells me, with her in charge, those horses will be in perfect form and those braces will be working." Again she looked at him from below her eyelashes, trying to take in his entire form.

 

“Well, I hope I'm easier to manage than our equine friends over there.”  He maneuvered in the chair, still coming up taller than Noelle.  He took a deep breath, staring ahead at the mirror for a moment before closing his eyes. He let his long fingers splay out on his thighs, nearly covering their length.  

 

Noelle realized her first client of the day had quite the way about him.  His jutting cheekbones and wavy hair were just highlights to the tiny laugh lines around his mouth and eyes.  Everything about him was lean and long.  He filled out the uniform with precision, giving the appearance of being even taller.

 

Noelle was shaken from her reverie by Tom clearing his throat.  She shook her head and dusted the pads first before spreading it onto his skin.  She saw his fingers beginning to tap against his thighs.

 

"Oh...yes, well, I handle humans much better than horses anyway." He grinned in her direction, keeping his eyes closed.  

 

She paused for a moment before continuing, “Have you ever had makeup for a movie before?” she asked. She wasn’t sure if, like many of the other actors, this was his first foray into a movie of this scale and scope.

 

His mouth broke out into the large smile he gave her earlier, with a chuckle added at the end.  Noelle realized he must love to smile, he did it so freely. “Yes, I’ve been lucky to be in a few movies before this one.”

 

She shrugged, not recognizing him. "Well, in that case, I’m going to start with the foundation and setting powder, so you know the drill.”  She realized she wouldn’t have to clean up too much on his face.  Luckily, he didn’t have the dark circles some of the cast had brought with them from their long journeys to North Hampshire.

 

He was able to stay motionless for about a minute before his hands started moving again. Noelle was able to ignore the tapping of the fingers, but he began shifting his legs in the chair.  With his long legs he was able to manage it several times before he almost bumped into Noelle.

 

When Tom began to rock his feet back and forth in tandem with his other body parts, Noelle paused for a moment. She found herself trying to apply the makeup without knocking translucent powder all over him.  

 

After her third unsuccessful attempt, Noelle suppressed a laugh, and stopped dusting his jawline. “Are you alright?  Because if you keep moving, I’m going to have powder in your ears and you’ll be digging it out for days.”  She crossed her arms waiting for him to look at her.   

 

Tom opened his eyes and for a moment the man was replaced by a contrite child.  Noelle couldn't help but want to help him quell whatever stormwas running through his mind.

 

“I am so incredibly sorry; I just can’t control it right now.”  He was trying to level out his breaths, but couldn’t seem to catch them. 

 

“I don't know what’s wrong with me today. For whatever reason, I keep thinking about the scenes and it’s totally overwhelming to me.”  

 

Remembering the script, Noelle realized that Tom was the character that would be leading the charge of soldiers into battle.  Ultimately, most would meet their deaths.  It was a horrid and gruesome scene; one filled with intense emotion and pain.  She rested back onto the vanity and tilted her head to catch his eye.  

 

Two crystal blue eyes flicked up towards hers as she spoke, “Okay, let’s put those fears to the light.  What’s the worst that could happen today?  You could fall off your horse?”

 

Tom's eyes widened as he nodded, his Adam’s apple bobbing faintly.

 

“Your horse could stumble; you could hold your sword in the wrong hand?" After she paused, Tom ceased all of his movements and his mouth hung open, pupils constricted.

 

"Maybe you miss the cue and lead over a hundred actors and their horses before anyone is even ready to begin filming?”

 

Tom began to choke and sputtered,“Are you trying to make this worse on purpose?”  His face had paled so much while she had been speaking that Noelle could see hints of green creeping up his cheeks.

 

She shook her head, genuinely sorry for causing such a sweet person such anxiety.  “No, I’m trying to verbalize all the things that could be a problem.  And I’m sure there are a hundred more things that you or I can’t imagine right now.” 

 

She shifted her legs and grabbed another set of foundations in her hands. Twisting the jar, she continued, “Think about exactly how small the percentage is of things that could go wrong.”  She paused, to allow him to hear what she was saying.  

 

“Now, realize that the probability of them going right is far more exponential.” She tapped the brush against her arm, blowing the extra dust off.  She leaned into his face, slowly swiping the powders under his cheekbones.

 

He frowned for a minute and eyed her carefully as she continued to work.  Her voice lowered, “There’s a reason you were cast for this part; I’m sure of it. They didn’t just choose people at random for these roles. There’s a vote of confidence in your favor.  And remember, this isn’t Spielberg’s first rodeo.  He’s worked with tons of young actors before, and I’m sure they made a mistake or two.” 

 

She placed her hands on her hips, trying to keep her concentration under his softening gaze. They were only a foot or two apart, eyes at the same height. 

 

“Remember: there are things you can control and things you can’t. When you realize that, sometimes it makes it easier to let go of the anxiety from the unknown.”  As she finished, Noelle instinctually grazed the tips of her fingers underneath his cheekbones and down the sides of his face.

 

Tom’s eyes lightened at her touch, not appearing upset in the least by her actions. Noelle thought she saw him blush, bringing his vision down to his knees.

 

“Thank you. I needed that this morning.”

 

She blushed on her own, catching herself and jumping backwards to place the tops back on the containers.  The tent was bursting with noise and people were starting to file down to costumes or production. Noelle regarded her first client with pride, “Well, Captain, I do believe you are ready for the cavalry today.”

 

Tom looked her over once more. Noelle noted how his eyes were so thoughtful.  She could see he was about say something that would make her blush again when a voice chimed in behind him, “Now, how about that? You two found each other!”

 

Both Noelle and Tom turned to find Benedict in his full regalia, ready for the scene.  There was complete silence until they could hold themselves together no longer. Benedict looked at the two of them with utter confusion.

 

“Someone want to let me in on the joke here?”

 

Noelle was the first to attempt to stop laughing, as Tom was practically bent over in his chair.  She tried to get the words out of her mouth in a coherent pattern, but they spurted in fragments as she tried to speak, “Oh, Ben. I…it’s…”

 

Tom stopped laughing for a moment to burst out, “The mustache!” and the two fell into hysterical giggles once more.  

 

Benedict looked into Noelle’s mirror and brushed down the large prosthetic; while sticking his upper lip out.  He completely ignored the now raucous cackling from his two friends as he preened in front of them.

 

“I think it makes me look good.  I look regal, charming, dashing even.”  He turned to his friend in the chair who had tears streaming down his face.  

 

“I certainly look better than this poor sap here,” he said, pointing to Tom with his thumb.  He knocked his hip into the chair throwing a shocked Tom off balance.  Tom almost fell over, but Benedict kept him from tipping.  

 

Noelle laughed and helped straighten Tom out.  He smiled as he held her arm, a breathless laugh now escaping his lips.  Suddenly, confusion clouded his face and he shook his head.

 

Looking between Ben and Noelle, his mouth dropped open. “Wait. You two know each other?”

 

Noelle sidled next to Ben, tilting her head backwards, “Oh, for way too long now.”  Ben laughed as well and threw his arm around Noelle.

 

Tom’s mouth grew wide in shock, “This is your friend! The one you were telling me about?”

 

Noelle gasped loudly, “You were talking about me?” she cried.  She threw an elbow into Ben’s ribs causing him to hunch over.

 

“All positives I swear!” He laughed and coughed simultaneously. Waving his arms in a grand fashion he groaned, “Tom this is …”

 

She turned and smiled, never losing eye contact with him, “Noelle.  Pleased to meet you, Tom.” 

 

Tom’s eyes twinkled at the connection, now a sense of comfort washing over his face. The tent seized in it's action as a high pitched voice echoed over the din of chaos. 

 

Polly immediately went to Tom's side to determine his readiness. Upon further inspection her face lightened at his development into the young Nicholls.  She turned and smiled brightly at Noelle, causing the younger artist to instinctively panic.

 

“Noelle, I am amazed! I knew you came highly regarded, and I can finally see the reasoning.  Fantastic application and finishing.  I want you working with Tom for the rest of the week, clear?” 

 

With a slight nod, Polly surveyed the two gentlemen and pointed at Tom specifically.  “You should be getting prepped on your horse, young man. They’re going to need you on set so everyone else will fall into place.”  And with a dash, she disappeared into the sea of green clothed soldiers, shouting orders at the rest of the artists in the mix.

 

Benedict grabbed Tom around the shoulders and hoisted him from his seat.  “Come on, old boy! You’ve got some charging to accomplish today!”  As Ben winked at Noelle, he escorted Tom towards the back of the makeup tent towards the crush of people coming from costumes.

 

Noelle screamed, "Good luck!" to her friends as they strode to the fields.  Tom kept looking back at Noelle and waving, and she couldn’t help but laugh and wave back at him.  She looked forward to having someone familiar with her during her stay and Tom appeared to feel the same way.  

 

She stared off towards the handsome man who had made her feel more relaxed than she’d felt in a long time.  Another actor came over to see if she was available and Noelle snapped into action.  She felt a renewed purpose to send those boys out as if they were ready to take on the world.

 

********

 

As the makeup crew broke for filming, many of the artists milled about the production; finding places to enjoy a coffee in peace. Noelle had another idea in her mind.  She worked her way towards the battlements and the line of teamsters for the production.

 

Waiting on the outskirts of the assistants running around, she heard the calls for silence as the horses were set in place.  Noelle could just make out the shapes of the men and their companions within the tall grass across the field. The area became quiet; the only sounds coming from the insects chirping from their homes.

 

A yell rose from the front of the line, signaling the beginning of action.  Noelle held her breath as she watched Tom on his horse rise from the grasses and charge forward.  Even from her distance, she could see his body confidently transform into a commanding officer. Within moments, the rest of the hundred or so actors behind him came into view.  

 

The horses and their riders turned into a sea of greens, browns and blacks cascading down the field towards a large wooded area.  It was then that Noelle saw the second row of actors, standing in for the German troops that would be filmed later. A line of cameras on mobile carts prepared to launch as the horses began their march.

 

It began with a slow and methodical pace.  The horses picked up from the grasses, soon appearing as if they'd take flight from their speed.  She saw Benedict at the front line, his sword held high over his head.  To his left was Tom, with a camera poised on him and his facial expressions.  From her distance she couldn't see them clearly, but she saw the strength in their stature on their horses.  

 

The crush of actors flowed towards the cameras. Noelle saw the small tent with their esteemed director at the far left of the filming.  As the calvary passed him towards the woods, the figure with the large hat threw his hands up into the air.  A cheer ran through the small crowd surrounding him.  Noelle found herself grinning as a roar cascaded through the throngs of spectators. In an instant, it was over.  It took hours of preparation for one scene--one incredible, jaw-dropping scene. 

 

One thing was certain: the trio had much to celebrate that evening. 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The day ends with the cast and crew at an impromptu meeting at a bar. The story of how Ben and Noelle met is finally revealed as well as the reasons for her escape into the English countryside. However, Noelle is finding herself distracted by her chances to be in close proximity to Tom. And he’s not making it easy for her either…..

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to everyone who messaged me on the first chapter! I apologize for the late follow up, but I hope it gets made up for in here.

"Oh, thank you-thank you. Yes, it was incredibly difficult to head up that entire calvary today. I mean, to be in command of an entire force, charging down an embankment towards our doom. The intricacy, the timing that was involved in such a procedure. It was amazing. Truly, I couldn’t have done it without all of you wonderful people."

Noelle watched as Benedict entertained the gathering of crew and cast members in front of him. Her eyebrows remained raised, all while her arms lay in front of her chest. He continued parading around the bar area while demonstrating his newly formed riding skills. Some of the cast were laughing along, while others were obviously enraptured by his charms. If anyone could entertain a crowd of people he had never met before, it was Ben.

As he continued his performance, Tom sat down across from Noelle at their table. Placing a tall glass of lager in front of her, his attentions turned to Benedict’s theatrics. After a minute, Tom looked over at Noelle and they both rolled their eyes at the scene.  

The pub was packed, with probably more people than they’d had all year.  The production was taking over the area of North Hampshire and, for now, the businesses were appreciative. 

Tom played with his glass, smiling brightly at Noelle. She could see he had a way with making whomever he was with feel like they were the only person in the room. 

“You’ve known Ben for a long time, correct?”

She shook her head in disbelief, “God, far too long. It’s been going on ten years now.”

Tom was impressed with this knowledge. “That long? My goodness. I think I remember him saying you met at Uni?”

A knowing smile crossed Noelle’s face as she remembered those days long ago. “Yes, we met when I was a first year in an introductory art history class.  Benedict was taking it to fulfill some requirement— that was when he was still focused own artwork and was into painting.

“It was early in the term, and per my usual, I was late to class because I was getting a coffee. The professor, who looked like he was a hundred and fifty years old, went off on me in front of everyone.

“Benedict stood up, not knowing me from anyone, and grabbed the cup from my hands. He pleaded, ‘Professor, it’s my fault, I asked her to pick up my usual.” Noelle stopped and looked over to Ben at the bar.

“Everyone at Uni knew Benedict and loved him. He’s always had such an inviting personality. You would meet him once, and he could make you feel as if he was your oldest friend.  

“It was no surprise when the professor just stopped his tirade and let me go. Ben sat me down next to him as the teacher continued his lecture.  

“When the professor wasn’t looking, Ben whispered in my ear, ‘I enjoy my coffee with a hint of cinnamon, so please do remember next time you’re late, darling girl.’

With a wistful smile she looked back to Tom. “We’ve been partners in crime ever since.”  

Tom laughed heartily, and Noelle couldn’t help but join in with him. “I give you so much credit for being friends with him for so long. But you’re not from England, originally? I can’t catch the accent, but it definitely isn’t from around here.” 

She blushed slightly, realizing he was thinking about her in some way. 

“No, I’m American-born, I decided on coming to England for school. Much to my family’s delight,” she deadpanned.  

Tom tilted his head, wanting to hear more. Noelle finished off her drink and continued, “My mother’s Aunt lives in Wales, and her family was my support system when I transplanted here.  It was quite a change from Massachusetts.”  

Tom had finished off his beer and toyed with the glass.  He looked relaxed in his light blue shirt and jeans. His golden hair was more messy than this morning, a few errant curls running around his head.

“I do not know the States all that well,” he sighed. “What’s it like?”

Noelle felt slightly lost when his eyes met hers, and she found herself rambling, “It’s an old fishing town of the East coast. It is very family oriented, and most people will remain-or come back eventually. Where I’m from, everyone knows everyone else; it has that small-town feel.”

Without a beat he asked, “Do you miss it?”

Noelle nodded, “From time to time, I miss my sisters.”

His eyes lit up at her words, “I have two sisters as well, one older, one younger than me.”  

Noelle brushed the hair back from her face, turning around to find Ben and a few of the cast members doing shots at the bar.  She groaned under her breath, hoping he’d reach his limit sooner than later.  Turning back to Tom, she leaned in her chair and stretched out her sore legs. 

“Another middle child, huh? Doesn’t surprise me.” She wiggled her finger at him and he playfully batted it away.  

She sighed, “I love them both to death, but they are so similar. They’re the intellectuals, the popular girls.”  

She rubbed her eyes, trying to force away the waves of exhaustion that were threatening to take over. “I’ve always been the odd one out.  Hence my decision in moving to England at eighteen. Then at twenty-two by completely forgoing my major by going into this business. Sometimes, I think they’d like to forget that I’m actually a relation.”  

“Oh, I doubt that.  Family can be difficult, but I can’t believe they’d forget you” he said with a sly smile.  “That seems impossible to me.” 

Noelle blushed and focused on her empty glass, now wishing she had something in there.

Tom took the initiative and carried on the conversation, “Hmm, they sound like my family in a way. They’re not all happy with me acting, either.  I think my father would love for me to have a steady, dependable job. An accountant or a lawyer, something where I would be settled down and have a family.”  

Noelle remembered their conversation from this morning, “You’ve been acting for some time, you said? You must have had some recognition to get on this film.”

Tom rolled his eyes with a smile, “Well, yes. You can say that, technically. I’ve been in some independent roles. I mean I played a phone operator in  _Conspiracy._  I’m there for about a half a second.” Noelle shrugged at him, a sheepish grin going across her face.

He waited for a moment and perked up. “I’ve done some television! Maybe you’ve seen me there?”

“Maybe!” She said while sitting upright.  “So, what have you been in?”

He looked upwards and “Well, um. I was in  _Miss Austen Regrets_?”

Noelle shook her head in the negative.

“Alright,  _Suburban Shootout_? You may not have recognized me, I had some wild curls going on there.” His hands danced around his head, and Noelle laughed at his movements.

Again, Noelle’s smile attempted to hide her lack of knowledge, “No, I’m sorry. I didn’t see that one either.”

“Hmm. Okay, how about  _Wallander_? With Kenneth Branagh? The detective program?”

She sucked the air between her teeth before mumbling, “I’m not a big fan of those shows.”

Throwing up his hands, Tom let out an exasperated sigh, “Well, you really know how to throw an ice cube down a man’s back.” He punctuated the statement with a loud laugh, his tongue resting between his teeth.   

Noelle shook her head, “No, I’m sorry! I have to admit, my television knowledge is limited lately from traveling.  I’ve enjoy most of the house renovation and cooking shows. I usually choose something mindless and easy so I don’t have to think too much, you know?”  

Tom nodded into his drink, “Hey, that’s quite all right, I know the feeling all too well.” He paused looking around them, a glint in his eye.

"I am going to be in something big next year, and honestly, I’m incredibly excited about it.”  As he leaned in to tell Noelle more, Ben returned  to the table and threw his arm around Tom, pulling him back.  

"Come on! Why are we all not celebrating? It’s a roaring success tonight."

Noelle sighed, “Yes, today was a success. Tomorrow is another day, darling.  I think it’s time for bed.”

Vehemently shaking his head, Ben demonstrated no interest in leaving the impromptu party. “Don’t be such a downer, Noelle. Just stay for ten more minutes!”

Noelle stood from her chair, grabbing her bag. “I’d love to darling, but there is no way I am going to be late tomorrow. I think Polly and Ashley would bring me to the front of the makeup tent and make me write lines until my hands fell off.”

Ben scoffed at her and smacked Tom again, “Come on man, lets go. Get up off your skinny ass.”  He walked away, saluting Noelle in the process.

Noelle stuck out her tongue at the back of Ben’s head. Saying goodbye to Tom, she realized how he dwarfed her at his full height.  _There’s something about a tall man_ , she thought. Putting her hands on her hips, she cocked an eyebrow.

“Tom, I’m putting you in charge to make sure he gets back to the hotel in one piece.”

He saluted her as well. “Yes, sir!” She saluted back with a chuckle and turned for the door.  

“Noelle?”

She came back to face him; he was leaning against the table with that kind smile she was quickly growing to enjoy.

“Thank you again for your help today.  Your words were in my head as we flew down that hill.”  

********************************

Balancing her coffee and phone in her hands, Noelle settled into her seat on the crew bus.  While the music blasted through her ears, Noelle scrolled through emails on her phone. She saw two possible jobs during fashion week in New York City after the end of filming. The thought of returning to the States wasn’t her first choice, but it was always a possibility.

She didn’t make the first bus out—no, that would have been too easy this morning.  However, she did make the second and was glad she did.  She watched the countryside flow from the windows on the bus. The sun was just starting to hit its fullest light. The yellow rays streamed through the trees and grasses, creating a ménage of oranges and reds throughout. 

Her feet rested on top of her silver case, knees pressed up to her chest.  The jeans and long sweater she chose were comfortable enough for the declining temperatures of the English countryside.  Standing in the mud for hours on end would require a little more help after the time everyone put in the day before.

Noelle couldn’t help but smile at Tom’s words as they floated in her ears.  Even though she felt he was flattering her last night at the pub, she could feel genuine kindness coming from him. He was a welcome distraction to the usual thoughts that flowed through her brain on any given morning.  

Only half of the makeup crew was in today. Filming required only the principals and some extras on hand for tighter field shots. She walked with a group of artists that came with her. The younger crew members talked about their excitement of being on a Spielberg movie-especially a historical one. 

Noelle smiled along at their enthusiasm.  She remembered the anxiety she experienced when she began in the business only 5 years prior. 

As she walked over to her vanity, she saw a few of the artists who were situated at their stations.  Due to the reduced amount of staff, there was markedly less background noise in the massive tent.  There was some banter going on, but Noelle couldn’t hear the conversation that well.  

Pulling out her bottles she searched for her cleaner to touch up her brushes. Suddenly she heard a surprised, “ _That’s her_?” with a shush from another individual.  Hairs rose on Noelle’s neck, but she shook if off as her own sensitivity. 

However, the hushed voices begin again and in the conversation she could plainly hear the name, “ _Edmund Chapman_ ”. The contents of her stomach rolled and she closed her eyes.  

It was only a matter of time before people put two and two together.  She had hoped it would have been later in the filming process, but with the media being so omnipresent, she couldn’t escape. _It was months ago, why do they still know my name?_

Even though they split up, he still managed to follow her to North Hampshire.

Taking a deep breath, she stood up from her position and looked over at the group.  Never breaking contact with them, she waited. They were whispering, until one of them noticed Noelle and shushed the rest. Noelle refused to relinquish her stare. After an uncomfortable minute, the group disengaged from each other, moving to their respective areas.   

If there was one thing she would make abundantly clear, she wasn’t going to be made to feel like an outcast while she was working.  She turned back to her vanity and began to organize her foundations, attempting to mask the shaking of her hands.

Polly entered the tent and Noelle was thankful for the distraction. 

"Today is principals and limited extras.  We will be as yesterday, but I’ll need Noelle, Mark, Marianne and Stephanie to join us in the field later for touch ups. Today’s filming is slated to continue until late this afternoon for the lighting."  With a quick look around she waved her hands, "As you were."

Noelle became lost in her thoughts, mindlessly cleaning one of her brushes.  She didn’t appear to care when some of the fibers floated to the floor around her feet.  Frowning, she never heard her name being called from behind.

“ _Yoo-hoo_ , Earth to Noelle?”

She turned back to find Tom, smiling like his usual gregarious self. She was embarrassed as his face fell in concern. Hitting the brush against her leg, she tried to grin as she waved towards her chair.  For a moment, she blanked out, forgetting the settings she used for him the day before.  

"Noelle, are you okay?" 

She heard his voice, but could not respond.  _Get yourself together._

The grin reappeared while she set the foundation in her hands. Even she could tell her voice sounded detached, ”Fine, just fine. How was everyone this morning? Everyone make it to call on time?”

His eyes never left her face, and Noelle could feel them burning into her skin.  She couldn’t meet them.  She feared that it would take just one look and the tears would begin to fall.  She focused on his jawline and kept moving.

Tom began with a lazy laugh, a prompt to have Noelle join in his fun. “Your boy is hurting this morning. One of the other cast members and myself had to drag him out of bed. I think we got him functional enough after some coffee.”  Noelle could still feel his eyes on her, but she moved again to get out of his sight.

She finally stopped when he put his hand to hers, lightly holding it. A tingle ran down her arm; a pleasant feeling she thought she’d forgotten.  “What’s going on?”

Swallowing, she was about to deny it again, afraid to open herself up. She wondered if she could trust him.  He was Ben’s friend, he couldn’t be too bad of a person.  Noelle figured she’d at least gauge Tom’s knowledge first.

"Please.  Let me return yesterday’s favor?" he asked.

Looking around the room at her co-workers, she could see everyone was engaged.  She dropped her voice as she spoke, “You know about Edmund, yes?”

He finally averted his gaze and looked to his hands.  After he nodded in the affirmative, she continued.

"Well, it seems my public disgrace has caught up with me here." Sighing deeply, she ran a hand through her hair.  

He returned to her face, ”I’m so sorry, I’m sure going through a breakup is bad enough.  To do it in the public eye must have been terrible.”

She leaned down, now close to his face while filling in the lines around his eyes. It afforded her the ability to speak in confidence without it being obvious.

"It’s the fact that my face was thrown around everywhere. I wasn’t Noelle Garguilo anymore.  I was: ‘Edmund’s ex’, ‘The makeup girl’, or my personal favorite, ‘The old flame before the starlet." The last one stung and she felt her mouth flinch from the words alone.  

"I just wished they’d leave me alone, but my name still gets brought up when they report on him. And her.” One tear escaped her eye, and she brushed it away with the back of her hand.

Frustrated beyond belief she sighed, ”No matter how far I go, whether it’s the United States or the middle of English farmland.  It’s always going to be the same.”

"No. It wont." 

Noelle stopped at his words.  They were forceful, different from what she had expected from him.

Turning in the chair, he faced her completely.  Their bodies were closer, closer than they probably should have been, but she didn’t move under his stern visage.

"You always have to keep the belief that things can change for the better.  Yes, you’re going through the muck right now—just like the mud outside of this tent." He pointed to the open flaps towards the roads that lead up to the film set.

“Mud is water and soil, and at the moment, it’s disgusting. With the right seeds and light, that mud would turn into the most beautiful flowers.  It’s all about what you make from a situation, what you learn so you can grow from it.” 

Noelle nodded, her eyes fixed solely on her boots.  She’d heard it so many times and in so many ways.  It had been six months since Edmund kicked her out for his new ingenue. She wondered if it would ever fully sink in that she could find her self-worth someday.

She was snapped out of her reverie by Ashley’s shrill voice ringing over the staff to send the cast out.  Noelle’s face turned white as she realized Tom wasn’t fully prepped.

"Oh, God! You’re not ready!" Her heart began to race, realizing she was about to be tossed on the second day.

Tom snapped up and looked at the crowd beginning to disperse.  He pretended to fix his costume but kept his head near her ear. His voice went low as he commanded, “Grab your case and go to the stables. I’ll meet you there.” The sound of his voice vibrating in her ear caused her to lose her train of thought for a split second. She knew she would have followed anything he said in that voice.

He ran out one of the back flaps, and Noelle haphazardly threw her tools into her case. She went out the opposite end and circled the tent, doubling her pace to the now-empty stalls.  

She found him in the back, standing against the doors.  The morning light glinted off of his uniform, the brass buttons shining like stars. Noelle couldn’t understand how he did it, but he made that green monstrosity look like an Armani suit.  

She tossed the case onto the straw and grabbed the most necessary items in her hands.  He had his hat against his hip, eyes shining towards the sky.  The smile grew on his face as she walked up to him, a little mischievous at their actions. Her own nerves were getting the better of her and a giggle escaped her lips.

"We’re being quite bad, you know,” he said with a drawl against his lips.

Noelle scoffed as she quickly set his makeup with a soft sponge.  “That’s what you get for hanging out with me. I bring it out in people, apparently.”

His eyebrow went up and he whispered in her ear, “I’ve been known to draw that out as well.”

Her breath got stuck in her throat and she attempted to keep the smile from forming on her face.  It didn’t work too well.  His breathy laugh caressed her neck and Noelle froze for a moment.

_Stop yourself right now. This—he—is not happening._ With that, Noelle brushed off his cheeks, finished with her job.  

She quickly turned around and mumbled towards her case, “I think you’re ready, Captain.  I’ll meet you in a few.” 

She stood back up, expecting him to leave for the cast area.  Instead, he was right in front of her, her face inches from his chest.

Noelle stammered, “Th-thank you for this, you probably saved my job.”

He twirled one of her curls in his hand, not meeting her eyes, “You’re welcome. See you out there.” He tipped his head to her and walked out into the sun, fixing his hat along the way.

Noelle found her stomach turning again, from butterflies this time.  Taking a deep breath she immediately slammed herself back into reality.  

Roughly throwing her brushes back into her case, she wondered why she was consistently being saved by men in her life. 

 

 

 


	3. Chapter 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This continues right where we left off…in the empty stables on the War Horse set. Noelle gives some insight in her and Ben’s friendship and the cast and crew head for another night out in the English Countryside. However, Tom continues to torture Noelle—in some very mischievous ways.

[  
Previous Chapter](http://crescent-moon-rising.tumblr.com/post/98190697339/the-night-is-darkest-before-the-dawn-chapter-2)

Noelle stood for a moment in the stables, her boots tracing lines on the floor. Shards of hay and dust skimmed against the scuffed tips of her toes. She was purposely stalling so her former companion would be long gone when she left. After an quick moment, she finally grabbed her things and headed out towards filming.

The air smelled of fresh grass and a hint of lavender. It barely registered to Noelle, her mind brimming with thoughts of what just happened, and about Mr. Hiddleston.

_Yes, he’s good looking, and charming. But, unless you’ve forgotten, you’re working on a major studio production. Right now is not the time for romance. You’ve almost lost your spot twice due to your stupidity. Get your act together._

The sun was high in the crystal blue sky. The fields around production were teeming with the crews setting up for the scenes. Noelle stopped before she went into the fray to grab a coffee from craft services. As she placed her order, she heard a loud groan behind her. She was nearly knocked over by the weight of a tall body leaning on hers.

“Oh, thank god you’re here. I’m in desperate need of your help today.”

“Godamnit, Benedict,” she growled. “What did you expect? You were drinking like you were back in Uni again.”  
  
He sighed, still leaning over her shoulders. “At least then I could manage the next day. Remember those good old days? We could drink all night and then head out to class with some respectable semblance about us?”

“Your memory is getting mangled from all these nights spent in a haze.” She turned and brought his chin up so he could see her.

She continued, “The next day? Maybe two days later you emerged from your room with glazed eyes. This is slightly different, dear. You’re working on a Spielberg project!”

He groaned again, finally standing somthing akin to upright. He looked disheveled, uniform all askew. The light brown straps on the sides of his chest were completely off his shoulders. Noelle held him in place to fix his buttons and jacket, the fabric already wrinkled. Knowing Ben, he’d been lying around in it until cast was called.

“When are you ever going to be able to take care of yourself?” She shook her head at him and he gave her his patented smile. The smile that crept up into the corners and highlighted the sparkle in his eye. He was well aware of how to immediately bring down Noelle’s resolve.

She reached over the counter to grab their take-aways. At that moment, it struck her how it was the same scenario from over ten years ago.

As she faced him, her mind began to flash back to memories of their past:  _I can’t remember a time without Ben’s support. After University, when I was working two and three jobs over in the West End just to make rent. He’d always find the right time to call me and ask how I was doing. Always offering help, which he knew I would not take. His ear was the offer I never turned down._

_His constant enthusiasm for everything I’ve done, even when others would laugh or turned their backs on me._

_Conversely, I’ll never turn my back on him. The years he scraped together parts in films, anxious about being in his thirties with little to show for it. The nights he’d pace his flat, wondering if he’d ever find a role that would help him make it in the industry. I was pacing behind him._

_No one questioned when I said I would be the one to pick him up from the airport after Africa. Not even Olivia. I was the one who sat in silence, waiting until he finally broke down in tears. The one who held him while he poured out every fear and anguish, and made sure he realized he would be okay. Eventually._

_It was no surprise that Benedict was the one who found me in that hotel room. The nights after Edmund, after my family’s disgust towards my humiliation. He was the one who brought me back from the depths of my personal hell._

She thanked every deity she knew for bringing him into her life. And here she was, like the first day they met, giving him another cup of coffee.

She heard a familiar voice clearing behind them. Ashley was waiting, arms crossed in front of her. The look she shot Noelle would have stunted a younger artist, but she ignored it with ease. Noelle wondered if Ashley was just a miserable human being or if this movie was making her this way. Noelle decided she just didn’t care.

“Benedict, you’re needed on set immediately. They’re prepping the horses for the scene.”

Ben threw out his usual charm, knowing how to diffuse a situation with a smile and a nod, “Yes, darling. I apologize, I will be there momentarily. Needed my caffeine fix.”

Noelle had to hide her audible gasp when Ashley broke the frozen tundra of her face with a somewhat decent smile. Never glancing at Noelle, she marched back to the crew area. The two watched Ashley walk down a small hill and out of sight.

Benedict waited a beat before he spoke. “What did you do to  _her_?”

“Apparently, my mere presence is an issue.” She looked at him, shrugging her shoulders in confusion. “I have no idea. I think she likes you, you’re the only one she’s refrained from putting into a sheet of carbonite with her stare.”

He scoffed after taking a sip, “Well, she has good taste, I’ll give her that much. Not too bad to look at either.” Noelle smacked Ben in the arm, causing the latter to laugh even more.

He sighed loudly before continuing, “What? I’m still in the shit with Olivia, I believe I’m allowed to look?”

“Still? This fighting has been going on for a couple of weeks already.”

He blew out his breath as they began the walk down the hill. “Everything’s an issue. I’m away too much, I’m annoying when at home. I’m going out with my friends and ignoring her, but she’s bothered when I stay in. Bottom line: nothing makes her happy anymore. It’s baffling lately. And aggravating.”

Noelle frowned, “That doesn’t sound like Olivia. She’s usually the level-headed one of you two.” Most people didn’t realize that the three of them attended University at the same time. Noelle felt it took Olivia ages to accept her friendship with Benedict. While they were never close, Noelle had considered her a friend, nonetheless.

He sighed again, pinching the bridge of his nose. “I don’t know what’s going on with her. I keep telling her that I’ll do whatever she needs. It’s just…it sounds like even she doesn’t know what that is, exactly.”

"Do you want me to call her? I could—"

He cut her off. “No. No, it’s fine. We’ll be home in two weeks. I’m trying to plan for us to go away for a few days—escape to a beach somewhere. Emily is looking into it right now.”

Noelle nodded to herself, but it all seemed strange. They were dating for twelve years. They lived together for the last five, an engagement was clearly on the horizon.

 _Wasn’t it?_  Benedict finally made his break with  _Sherlock_  and  _War Horse_. Why would Olivia be giving him a hard time?

She didn’t have time to ask more questions as they reached the staging area. She waved Benedict off and entered the crew’s tent to set up her supplies. She could see the actors preparing for the scene in the field and Tom fell into her sights.

It was hard not to notice him against the other actors. She had overheard someone calling him statuesque and Noelle could see it was true. He appeared taller, leaner and frankly, dominant over the men around him.

Noelle was equally as impressed how he managed all of it in the putrid green uniform. It looked good on Benedict, but it was regal on Tom. Noelle shook her head with a shudder as to the impeccable specimen she was privy to behold.

Noelle’s prior experiences of working on movie sets prepared her for the day’s activities. Working on a movie consists of short bursts of hyperactive energy followed by long periods of intense boredom. The wait could be endless before they could be called to the actors, and then it would be a race to get them ready for the cameras once more.

While her younger co-workers were playing cards, Noelle decided to check through those emails regarding Fashion Week. A few did appear to be of some interest, and she responded to her contacts for more information. The call came out for a break, and the crew headed to their assigned actors.

Noelle weaved through the crowd back to Tom, a smile encompassing his lips before she was in reaching distance. She couldn’t help but reflect his with one of her own.

“Hey stranger, how’s it going this morning?”

There was a tint on his cheeks, the afternoon sun now hitting it’s highest point. The lack of clouds in the sky provided little cover for the late summer rays.

His voice went down as if he was telling her a great secret, “Well, as you can see, things are heating up around here. We’re made progress to filming the second part of this scene and it’s only taken us two hours. So, it’s been grand, really.”

Noelle laughed as she unwound one of the tops from her foundations. She dabbed it across Tom’s face, their bodies now almost touching. She could feel the heat pouring off of him in the uniform. Her fingers glided across his smooth skin, and she could feel he was building up a light sheen from the heat.

He laughed under his breath, “I feel like I’m in the Sahara in this uniform. They’re going to have to peel it off of me at the end of the day.” Noelle could feel her eyebrows raise involuntarily, and she knew he caught her in the act. It was not the mid-morning sun that caused the blush across her cheeks.

Blending in his makeup, she tried to cover herself. “Well, you’re holding up quite well, under these intense and brutal conditions. All I can smell is your cologne.”

It was his chance to raise his eyebrows, his voice going down to a whisper, “Oh, you noticed, huh?”

She could not help but notice. It was an indiscernible kind of smell: clean and fresh with a hint of a woodsy tone. He was laughing at her again, much to her growing frustration. She knocked into him with her elbow, aiming for his rib cage. His hands flew up in front of his chest, trying to defend himself.

“I’m sorry, I’m sorry! You know what happens to my character! Please, have pity on me!”

She grabbed his burgundy gloves from the top of her case and shook them at him. “Absolutely not! You and Ben are going to drive me crazy these two weeks!” The self-satisfied smirk on his face was driving her mad.

The assistant director called the actors on set to take their places. Tom turned to face her as she reached up and smoothed out his hair. The sun’s rays were highlighting the golden hue in Tom’s curls.

Even with her heels, she was only level with his chest. It also placed her firmly underneath his strong gaze. Their proximity, his scent, the warm breezes around them were contributing to her heightened nerves. She found herself flustered and started rambling.

“You’re all ready. Thankfully, we wont have to worry about sneaking off and finishing what we started, like last time.” She felt her mouth drop open in shock.  _What the hell are you saying?_

He dipped his head and bent towards her, his lips jutting out ever so slightly. “Yes. That would be a shame, wouldn’t it?”

She huffed under her breath, the blush turning to redness in a flash against her skin. She attempted to be stern with him. “You need to go.  _Now_.” She pointed towards the filming area with a large fluffy brush, but a smile crept towards the corners of her mouth.

His laugh echoed behind him as he walked away from her. Noelle couldn’t hide the groan that escaped her lips as she rubbed her face from exhaustion. At least, that’s what she kept telling herself.

***********************************

That evening was another opportunity for  _War Horse_ ’s cast and crew to take full advantage of their downtime. Most of them were being housed in Devon, which luckily had a tavern that could hold a great deal of people. With the larger group, the decision was for an establishment that had music and a dance floor. The youthful cast was ready to shed the serious nature of their roles by the end of the day.

For the second night in a row, Noelle found herself dragged out by Tom, Ben and a few other crew members. She kept warning that they were filming their “small shots” the next day. These were the ones that required the three captains and a handful of extras.

“You’re filming the encampment scenes tomorrow. Do you think you might want to take it easy tonight?”

Both of them laughed at her while they ordered another round. Noelle left them in a huff, searching for her crew-mates. Her face lit up when she found Mark and Stephanie off of the dance floor. There was an easy camaraderie between the on-site crew, especially after spending most of the day together.

Mark was discussing his interpretation of their head and assistant-head’s personality traits, when the music picked up. They pulled a reluctant Noelle onto the dance floor, every movement telling her it was time to go back to the hotel. The burning trailed down her legs into her feet, every inch of skin screaming at her to stop. However, even she could admit that it felt good to be out with people.  _God, I haven’t danced in ages._

After a few songs, she felt someone grab her hand. She turned to find Benedict, glass at the ready, pulling her into a circle. The beat reverberated through her body and for a moment, she could feel every ounce of her stress dissipate. It was a moment to finally be free. She was away from her work, away from the pressures and the constant looking over her shoulder. She felt a permanent smile as they moved together with the crew around them.

Even inebriated, Benedict had the ability to dance like they were back in University. Noelle could never understand how he was able to pull it off. Most men with less alcohol running through their system would be flat on their ass. Ben made it look easy, and most of the women around him noticed that fact.

When there was a break in the music, Benedict checked his phone. He frowned at the screen and looking at Noelle mouthed, “ _Olivia_ ”. He nodded towards the door. She waved him off as the music began again and attempted to sit down. Her collision with a now-familiar chest nearly knocked her over.

Tom’s smile expanded across his face upon finding Noelle. He was wearing a dark blue shirt, buttons on the top open already. She could tell by the shimmer in his eyes that he’d thrown back a few more since she last saw him. Her attempt to side-step him was blocked and before she knew it, she was back on the dance floor.

 _I thought Benedict was a good dancer? Tom has him beaten, easily._  The difference being, while Benedict would keep his distance, Tom clearly did not. His hands kept resting on her arms, her sides and her back. His touch was soft yet direct.

Noelle felt heady, partially from the alcohol, partially from the exhaustion of her day. As the songs kept playing, and the two kept dancing, Noelle found herself in Tom’s arms and against his body. She had to admit it was happening more frequently than appropriate, but she was surprised to find she did not care.

She was out of breath by the next break, sweat running down her back. She could see the glow off of his face, as he was laughing with another actor. As they left the dance floor, she pulled her hair up in her hands to get some relief.

Gasping, she breathed, “You have style there, Hiddleston! How’d you manage that?” For a second, she thought she caught him eyeing her neck before he turned to the bar. Without a word, he handed her another beer.  _Between the late nights and the alcohol, I’m never going to survive this movie._

He took a long drink from his pilsner glass and winked at her. “I’ve always had style. Who do you think taught your boy over there how to dance?”

Noelle scoffed at Tom, “Are you serious? You forget how long I’ve known Benedict.” She took a drink before continuing. “You do not want to play that game with me, Thomas.”

His face exploded in a smile, throwing his arms out to her. “Oh, no, this is  _perfect_!” She soon found herself at one of the secluded tables off the floor, linked arm and arm with her newest friend.

"Okay, so let’s do this.  _How well do we know Benedict_.” Putting his arms on the table, Noelle realized she hadn’t stopped laughing since she found herself in his presence. It was a good feeling.

"We’ll go in rounds. If necessary we’ll ask the gentleman in question to join us for confirmation. Deal?"

She tilted her glass to him and Tom began: “What’s his favorite animal?”

Noelle laughed, “Owls. Jesus, ask me something difficult next time, huh?” He laughed taking another drink, holding one finger up on his hand. “Okay,” she continued, “tell me his full name.”

Tom stopped and looked upwards, the blue in his eyes twinkling like stars in the sky. “Okay, Benedict..Timothy….” he trailed off, trying to remember his other middle name. Noelle leaned in, awaiting his first mistake.

"Carlton! Carlton Cumberbatch! Yes!" he shot his hand up in the air to punctuate his win. Noelle sat back in her seat, holding up a finger on her hand.

"Okay, how about: What was the first role he had, not a studio film, not an independent."

She shook her head. “Really? How about he played Jesus in his school’s nativity at Primary School.”

His raucous laughter mirrored her own. “Back to you, it’s 2-1.” Noelle had to admit, this was becoming quite fun, being alone with Tom.

She paused for a moment before asking, “What is the name of his favorite movie?”

“Ohh, man. He told me this…oh, God.” The alcohol was starting to kick in, along with the late hour, and Noelle could see he was fading fast.  _I’ve got this one_ , she smugly smiled.

He snapped his fingers and pointed at her, ” _Ghostbusters_.”

Noelle’s face dropped. “That was a lucky guess!” With a huff, she put up two fingers.

He crossed his arms, a flick of his tongue rolling over his lips. “Okay, what is his favorite sexual position?”

Noelle gasped so loud, she nearly choked. “ _What_!? Oh my  _God_ , I can’t answer that! I- I.” She realized he effectively knocked her down from her pedestal.

That devilish grin returned to his face. ”That would be three for me, dear.”

“No! How…how do you even know that?” Noelle was so taken back, her words kept tumbling over each other. Her heart was racing, her chest rising and falling at a torrid pace.

The air around them changed, from light and free to heated. Noelle swore that the music stopped; everything stopped around them. He folded his fingers under his chin. Leaning towards her, he whispered, “Because, it’s my favorite as well.”

She wasn’t sweating from the dancing anymore. He was purposely teasing her and enjoying every single second of it. As his laughter intensified, so did her anger. She abruptly stood up from the table, her chair scraping loudly against the floor.

“That’s my cue. Goodnight, Tom. Thanks for the drinks, but I’m going back to the hotel.”

The smile dropping from his face, he jumped from his chair. “Wait, wait!” and reached for her hand. There was no denying the jolt of excitement when his fingers wrapped around hers.

“I am sorry. I was just kidding around, I should know better.” The murderous glare on her face stopped him in his tracks. “I am! I wanted to see I could stump you, that was dirty of me.” His eyes were still twinkling mischievously.

She sighed, the resistance lessening with every inch of his body moving closer to hers. “Fine. It’s time for me to head back. I am desperate for some sleep.”

He bowed down and held out his hand. “May I go back with you? A gentleman to ensure your safety in this dark and treacherous hamlet?”

She could only nod at his offer, too tired to protest that she could handle herself. She was appreciative when Tom guided them through the thinning crowds. Noelle searched quickly for Benedict. Not finding him, she assumed he was back at the bar finishing off another round. She couldn’t think straight, finally relenting that he could find his way back to the hotel.

The late hour brought a chill to the air, and Noelle felt it through the dampness in her sweater. She rubbed through the thin fabric on her arms as they walked along the sleepy streets. Tom put his arm around her, his large hand bringing her close to him.

"You looked cold." he said with a small smile.

As they made it into the hotel, they were the only ones walking through the lobby and the sounds of their shoes  _smacked_  off the walls. Once safely in the elevator, Noelle couldn’t help her head dropping against the wall. She wanted, in order: some tea, her PJ’s and her bed.

She opened her eyes to his dark blues and a lazy smile in her vision. The butterflies raced again in her stomach, and she couldn’t deny how gorgeous he looked. His hair was now even more errant, his curls loose around his head.

She was saved from an awkward conversation by the doors opening to her floor. Noelle went to stand between them to thank him. He walked towards her, gently pushing her into the hallway. Tom’s voice was low and firm, just as it was in the stables all those hours earlier.

"What gentleman would I be if I didn’t walk you to your door?"

Just as before, Noelle felt the compulsion to obey his words. Her mind raced as they walked to her door.  _What do I do? Hug him? God, I would love to kiss him. I can’t, though, this isn’t the right time or…._

Her thoughts were cut off by the lanky body that sprawled across her door. Both Tom and Noelle crept towards the figure, which was humming a tune to himself.

Once he noticed he two individuals in front of him, Benedict began to rouse from his stupor. His words were barely intelligible over the heavy slurring. “Can’t find my key…I think it’s somewhere here…somewhere…my pants….maybe?”

He had a moment of clarity, though, when his eyes became more focused. “Tom, isn’t your room on the fourth floor?”


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As filming changes location to Wiltshire Village of Castle Combe, Noelle finds herself in the midst of changes that will impact her professional and personal life. 
> 
> Comments, thoughts and love are always welcome!

The next few days ran into a blur in Noelle’s mind. The crew were busy with managing the final shoots for the battlefield scenes. The weather began to turn into an actual Autumn in the English countryside. Noelle found that the best way to keep warm was by running like a madwoman around the sets. She found Polly was utilizing her more in working with the more established actors.

She also found herself consumed with keeping her professional sense while in Tom’s presence. Her ability to do this was becoming harder and harder to manage as they spent more and more time together.

Noelle was able to avoid the pitfalls of her new and old friends as they continually harassed her joining their debauchery. She went so far as to lock and barricade her door one night as the two of them pounded on it. She couldn’t help her laughter when she yelled she was washing her hair, and to come back another night.

At the end of the first week, they moved to the location in Wiltshire Village. Soon, every hotel and inn was filled with the expanded cast. The scenes with Albert and the English forces as they descend through the town were the first on the schedule.

Noelle had just finished setting up her new station, now in a smaller tent created for the main actors in for filming. As if on cue, she heard the familiar voice clear behind her. Facing her boss, she was greeted by Polly and a handsome but youthful gentleman next to her.

"Noelle, this is Jeremy. He’s playing the part of Albert and he will be with us for today and tomorrow for the scenes in town. We’ll move down to Dartmoor in a week, for the early shots with his family."

With a proud smile, she said, “I’d like you to work with him for the entirety of filming, Noelle.”

The breath left Noelle’s throat. The character of Albert had been originally assigned to the Makeup Director from the start of filming. Even if she was to hand off such an integral character during process, Noelle would have assumed he’d go to Ashley.

She couldn’t help the stuttering from the excitement in her chest, “Th-thank you, Polly. I promise I wont let you down.”

Turning to the kind brown eyes in her favor, she couldn’t hold back the grin on her face. “Jeremy, it’s a pleasure to meet you.”

The warm smile in response expanded over his face, almost touching his ears. “It’s a pleasure to meet you too, Noelle. Should be fun to work together, no?” He clasped her hand in his and held it tightly before giving it a slight squeeze .

She couldn’t help feeling light around him. The fact she was receiving the main focus (non-equine, obviously) of the movie as one of her clients was remarkable. Grabbing her color palette, she had him hop into the chair as she made some selections. She began her work by cleaning up his face. For a young actor, he fit the mold as he had the skin of a teenager.

She realized that this was his first big production film, and he was practically jumping out of his skin. He loved to talk and was prattling on and on about the extensive horse training he had experienced in the past few weeks. As he was demonstrating his riding mishaps, to Noelle’s amusement, she heard her name being called from behind her.

“Hello, stranger! How’s the morning treating you?” she asked Tom with an expansive smile. Noelle’s mouth still ached from her laughter at Jeremy’s miming in her chair.

“Fine, yourself?” Tom asked, his voice low and detached. His eyes roamed around the new surroundings, never making eye contact with Noelle. She shrugged it off as exhaustion and turned back to Jeremy.

“Well, Mr. Narracott, I afraid you’re about to lose your horse,” she said. Jeremy let out a boisterous laugh, garnering interested glances their way.

Jeremy threw up his arms in the seat, to the laughter of the cast around him. “Nothing to see here folks, we’re just getting down to some horse business.” Noelle laughed again and sent him on his way to costumes.

She then turned to her other favorite client on set, already in his uniform pants. His upper body was covered in a tight white t-shirt. She could outline each of his muscles, as they molded against his shirt.

“Have a seat, Captain,” she said with a smile. Without a change to his features, he sat in the chair, looking forward. She grabbed her tools and got right down to work—noting he was more reserved than usual.

“You working with Jeremy too, huh?”

She looked up at Tom’s question, his voice low and without inflection. She was unable to hold back her enthusiasm in her answer.

“Yes, I am! I guess I’m doing something right around here. Polly just asked me to work with him, even though he was to be her client throughout filming.”

Tom turned to Noelle, tilting his head to the side, “This was unexpected news?”

Noelle nodded her head vehemently, curls bouncing around her face. She dropped her voice as she bent to his ear, “I’m pretty sure he should have gone to Ashley, since she’s assistant director and he’s a major role in the movie.” She trailed off and moved to his other side as she blended in the makeup against his hairline.

“It’s unbelievable, but, he’ll be working with me. This means I’m on set longer and get to travel to Dartmoor, as well!”

Something clicked in Tom after hearing the news of her mini-promotion. His face relaxed and the warmth crept through his eyes once more. Noelle felt his hand on her free arm, his thumb grazing against the softness of her skin.

"This is fabulous news. I’m glad they are appreciating your talent and rewarding you. This should be a big step for your career."

When Noelle looked up, she couldn’t help the blush that ran across her cheeks. She could never be completely certain, but when he looked at her, his eyes seemed to darken like the ocean. It was completely disconcerting, and tended to distract her thoughts away from her tasks at hand.

Finishing up his cheekbones, she used her small brush for his eyes. The highlighting powder gave his eyes a more youthful appearance.

A sly grin ran up his mouth, “We should all celebrate tonight.”

Noelle couldn’t control the volume of her voice in response, “Oh, no! Absolutely not. The last time was more than enough, thank you very much. I’m nearly out of aspirin and the coffee around here isn’t strong enough!”

"Come on, this is a big deal!" he scoffed, now turning towards her. Noelle found herself between his legs. As she tried to move away, he gently held her arm. The shockwave through her skin caused Noelle to flash back to a hot and sweaty dance floor—and Tom dangerously close to her body.

His voice dropped a few octaves as he whispered in her ear, ”Don’t pretend like you haven’t been avoiding us, Miss Garguilo.”

She groaned, and closed her eyes. She was yanked from her daydream, only to be dropped right into another one.

"I owe you a drink after the torture I placed on you last time." Crossing his arms on his chest, the cheeky smile returned.

"You know you miss watching your boy and me getting into trouble." He punctuated his statement by tilting his head and raising his eyebrows towards her.

With a loud sigh, Noelle acquiesced, “How about this? We make it through filming today and I do not pass out on the bus ride back, then you can buy me that drink.”

Sticking out her right hand and raising her eyebrow, she asked, “Deal?”

“Deal.”

***************************  
Noelle’s hopes for a long day of shooting were dashed when a cloudburst ran through the village and surrounding areas. The crews were not ready for the rapid change in weather. Everyone was sent back with the notification that filming could resume on the set at any time.

The rain poured down long enough for it to be too late for outdoor filming, and the day was called. This left the cast quite rested and energetic as they made their descent into the villages.

Noelle hadn’t seen Benedict all day, knowing he had a meeting with one of the producers on his project that followed _War Horse_. He did text her that he would be meeting them at the pub in town to  _"make up for her incessant pining from being without him.’_

The rain finally letting up, Noelle decided against waiting for Tom at the hotel. Instead, she heading out with her friends from the crew. The group of five artists were quickly learning they enjoyed each other’s company. Noelle was happy to give advice and guidance, being the one with the most experience in the group.

They had gotten through their first round of drinks, and Noelle insisted on paying for the next one. Waiting for their order, Noelle felt her phone vibrate against her skin. Looking down she saw the caller:  _Marcella_.

There had to be a good reason if one of her best friends would be calling her on her mobile. The eight hour time difference between Los Angeles and London proved difficult for them to speak. Usually, they would send text messages back and forth to check in when Noelle was overseas. It was easier and cheaper than having the international access. To net a phone call meant something important.

Noelle jumped on the call, yelling, “Marcella, hang on— _don’t hang up_. Let me get out of this bar so I can hear you!” She told the bartender to send the drinks over to the crew’s table and she headed outside.

When she finally escaped the crowds, she raised the phone back to her ear again. Looking up and down the street, all she saw were War Horse members milling about. Her boots  _clacked_ against the cobblestone streets as she breathed in the early night air.

"Hey honey, is everything okay?” she asked.

Noelle could hear her friend clear her throat before speaking. For some reason, Noelle felt her stomach drop at the length of the pause.

_"I’m so sorry I have to call you while you’re working, Noelle. Is it late? It’s just after two o’clock here, I’m just getting back home. Were you asleep?”_

_She’s rambling. Why is she acting like this?_  “Marcella, what’s going on?” Noelle’s hands were shaking, only partially from the cool air around her.

A long sigh echoed over the phone, before she spoke,  _“I just knew you’d need to hear this from someone in person.”_

Noelle could feel her throat tighten, her skin set off with an uncomfortable tingle. ”You’re starting to make me anxious.”

_"I’m not trying to be dramatic, I just… Okay, I’m just gonna spit it out. I was at an In Style brunch this morning to view some of the early summer fashions for next year."_

Noelle’s face scrunched up and she held her forehead against her hand.  _If this is some fashion related disaster story I’m gonna kill her the next time I’m in Los Angeles._

_"There was a ton of fashion reporters like myself but there were some celebrities, as well. You know that In Style loves to throw these fancy things. They show off all the people they could catch for the newest spread. The food was awful too…"_

Noelle cut her off, “Marcella, I love you, but please get to the point.”

Her friend sharply inhaled and the words flew out,  _"Noelle, Siobhan DiCampos was there."_

Her hands stopped moving and Noelle’s head dipped back, eyes shut tight.  _Edmund’s new infatuation._

"So? I’m more disappointed in the magazine for having such low-caliber celebrities there.” When Marcella didn’t laugh, Noelle could feel her anxiety perk up again.

 _“Well, you see, it was all these open rooms and the celebrities were drinking. Of course, Siobhan was walking around talking to all the reporters.”_  She paused again, and Noelle was certain it was because she was having a hard time getting the words out. Just before Noelle was about to snap again, Marcella finally got to her long-winded point.

_“She was telling everyone that Edmund proposed to her over the weekend.”_

The people hanging around the outside of the pub all turned towards Noelle. The uninhibited laugh that flew from her abdomen echoed around her. “No, she’s drumming up press for herself. It’s impossible. Edmund hates the idea of marriage, he told me that repeatedly for the five years I was with him.”

She found herself pacing at the corner of the block, watching more cast and crew enter the pub for the night’s festivities. She kept shaking her head and waving her arms around.

“No, Marcella, it has to be a lie. They’ve only been together for six months.” She stopped and put her hand on her hip while trying to come up with excuses in her mind. “Isn’t she in that new Ridley Scott movie? She’s probably trying to get her name in the dailies…”

It was Marcella’s turn to interrupt Noelle.  _“Honey, she has a ring.”_

Noelle could feel her body stop, and she heard a buzzing in her ears. Everything around her sounded fuzzy, as if it was through a sheet of cotton.

“No…no.” she heard herself trail off amidst the murmured words of Marcella from the other side of the world.

_“Noelle, I thought the same thing you did. She’s such a fame-hungry parasite, I asked my publisher if she heard anything. She called over to Jonathan from WME._

_"He said it’s going to be confirmed in the next day or two for the press.”_

Noelle could feel her stomach lurch as the realization hit her body.  _Edmund is represented by William Morris. They would know before anyone else. The agency is probably setting up a photoshoot or interview to make the announcement._  She could hear Marcella still speaking, but couldn’t bear to listen to her anymore.

Noelle let the phone dangle from her arm as the other buffered her head against the brick facing of the building. She tried desperately to catch her breath, but found her chest rising and falling without pause. A torrent of memories flashed in her mind, ones she had hoped to never relive again. Hearing his voice in her head made her ill.  Even still, she felt the undercurrent of superiority that always peppered his speech.

_“Noelle, how many times have I told you? I’m not getting married until I have that franchise movie role. It’s no good to have a lead actor who’s attached when he’s promoting a huge film.”_

_“What’s the difference? We’re living together, and I make enough money for us both. Why do we need a stupid piece of paper to define our relationship?”_

_“Well, I’m sorry Noelle. You’re just not what I need right now. It’s time for me to be connected with someone who is close to my own status in the industry. If I’m going to be an Oscar winner, it’s ridiculous to have a makeup girl on my arm.”_

_“Noelle! Please answer me, honey!_ ” Noelle heard the desperate words of her friend floating upwards. They pulled her out of the trance she was firmly ensconced and she brought the phone back up to her ear.

She swallowed before speaking, “Thank you Marcella. This would have been worse to read or hear about from someone else.” Noelle couldn’t help her voice sounding detached and lifeless. It was reflective of the rest of her body.

Noelle breathed in the early September air, trying to steady herself. “I- I have to go”

_“Oh Noelle, please—I’m sorry honey. This is awful, I know. Just—just realize we all know what kind of a jackass Edmund’s become and it’s well-known throughout the agencies.”_

_Doesn’t help when this is all over every publication and entertainment show in the next week._  “Marcella, I will call you tomorrow. I promise, but I have to go now. Bye, sweetie.”

She didn’t wait to hear her friend again before she closed the phone. All she knew was that every inch of skin on her body was screaming. She needed to escape, the only decision that made sense as she stood against the pub’s exterior.

Steadying herself in the high heels she loved, she started back to the hotel. She passed the double doors of the bar before she realized: _My wallet is still on the table._

It took every muscle in her body to turn back and enter the now-bustling area. Pushing through the crowd, Noelle didn’t care who she bumped into as she made her way to the table with her crew-mates.

Mark was the first to notice Noelle upon her return, her eyes scanning the table for her belongings. She barely heard him as he spoke to her.

“Hey, Noelle! Want to join us? We’re going to order some food while we’re here.”

Jutting out her lips and shaking her head, she had to decline. She couldn’t even break a smile. “No thanks. I’m really tired at the moment, so I think I need to head back. You guys have fun, though, okay?”

She grabbed her things as she heard the chorus of goodbyes behind her. Noelle hated being rude, but she was losing the ability to speak and think properly. She began to weave between the people on the dance floor, headed for the doors.

A thought ran through her head to find Benedict. She needed someone to talk to about this disaster, and he would understand. As if in concert, the other set of inner voices began to chime along. Only these voices were louder and stronger in their intensity.

_Running off to old reliable Benedict again, aren’t you? A thirty-two year old woman who still needs someone to take care of her when things go downhill? You truly are pathetic._

Her eyes narrowed through her blurred vision. She was almost to the doors and the freedom of the cool air outside when she felt a hand wrap around her wrist. She could barely hold back the anger towards the person who dared to impede her progress.

Noelle’s chocolate rimmed eyes met a pair of kind blue ones in return.  _Damnit, he’s the last person I wanted to see right now._

Tom’s cheeky grin dropped when he saw the furious glare in Noelle’s features. “I was just looking for you, we had celebratory shots all set for your arrival. Are you okay?”

She couldn’t meet his eyes, instead looking at her shoes as they tapped against the wood floors. “No, I have a terrible headache and it’s affecting my stomach. I need to go back to the hotel.”

Noelle pulled her hand away from Tom and continued her rapid pace outside. She was halfway up the street before she heard her name called from behind her. She couldn’t help her eye roll as Tom made his way back to her side.

Huffing slightly, he haltingly said, “Let me at least walk you back, if you’re sick you shouldn’t be doing this alone.” Noelle ran her hands against the nape of her neck and let out a stilted breath. Her head was still spinning and she was aggravated with his interruption. It took a moment for her to realize his hand was on her back and guiding her towards the hotel.

She grumbled, “I’m assuming I have no say in this?” He shook his head in the negative and they walked the few blocks back to their temporary residence. The hotels in Castle Combe were all within a short distance to each other, making their walk last less than a few minutes.

Noelle was thankful that it was still early enough for most of the hotel’s patrons to be either out or already in their rooms. Noelle glided through the almost silent lobby to the elevators. She paused as Tom gently moved them towards the small bar on the interior.

Before she could look up and express her immediate frustration, Tom held up his other hand. “You need something warm to drink. Let’s get some tea in you before you head upstairs.” Noelle closed her eyes and nodded, too exhausted to fight anymore.

As they stood by the bar, Noelle picked at the sides of her nails, without speaking. Tom broke the silence, and she realized it was directed towards her.

“I-I’m sorry, Tom. I wasn’t thinking straight. Did you just ask me something?”

He chuckled under his breath. “Yes, I was just asking how things went with Jeremy today.”

“Oh,” she said, thinking it might be beneficial to think about anything but the issues she was facing at the moment.

“Well, yeah, he’s quite a sweetheart. Loves to talk. I didn’t think I could meet someone who can talk more than you or Benedict, but he seems to be trying to break that record.” She didn’t look up, but heard his laugh under his breath.

She felt his hand on her back, moving in circles. It was another welcome distraction to the evening’s events.

Tom bent downwards to Noelle, close enough for her to smell his cologne again. She shut her eyes, not realizing a tear slid down the side of her face. Noelle kept chanting, willing her body to stop all emotion. She refused to allow Tom realize her pain was not physical.

“It’s going to be okay, Noelle,” he whispered. She kept her eyes closed and nodded. Blessedly, the drinks finally came for both of them, and Noelle rested the hot cup between her hands.

She was happy that Tom was silent while they sat against the smooth mahogany. She hated to admit it, but he was right, the tea did temporarily help her feel better. Now, she wanted the darkness of her room. She wanted to bathe in the depths of the night to forget the anger and hurt she couldn’t yet release.

They made their way upstairs, his hand firmly remaining on her back the entire time. She had to admit that his long fingers dragging against the fabric on her skin sent tingles down her spine.

She realized she’d been holding her breath as they walked to her door. She turned to face him, finding his arm resting above her on the frame. Noelle allowed herself eye contact, and found herself breathless once more. While they had been this close every day on the set, she could not help her teeth as they pressed down on her lower lip while she watched him.

His eyes moved from hers to her mouth and back again. It appeared he was trying to come up with something to say to Noelle, but couldn’t make a decision. They were close enough for Noelle to see his nose flare in time with his quickening breaths.

To break the silence, Noelle barely heard herself thank him. The words never registered as they floated from her mouth. She was distracted by her heart beating against her chest and in her ears. He nodded, allowing a slip of his tongue over his lips.

Noelle’s leg started moving back and forth, unsure of what to say next. It was unnecessary, as Tom’s mouth found hers, silencing the both of them. She sighed against the soft skin of his lips as they caressed her own. Noelle could feel her body release the pent up tension, gliding from the top of her head straight through her legs to her toes.

The hand above hers rested against the side of her face, and Noelle’s hands found the collar of Tom’s shirt. She lost her place as his tongue slid into her mouth. She was surprised how easily she met his with hers, feeling lightheaded in the process. Her fingers wound around his shirt, grazing his skin.

Tom broke the kiss first and backed away, a frown against his brow. His hands flew into his back pockets, as he stuttered, “I-I’m sorry, Noelle. I’ve wanted to do that since we met, but—I didn’t know if it was right.”

One of his hands flew into his hair, “I shouldn’t have done that, you’re not feeling well. That was stupid.”

Bouncing against his feet, he looked away and said, “Anyway, feel better and good night.” He started to walk away from her and down the hallway.

Breathless but still tingling, she opened her door with the key card. She stopped as a cacophony of voices sounded within her head. Some ordered Noelle that this was a traumatic night for her, and she should go right to bed. Some were screaming he was the wrong person being Benedict’s good friend.

It shocked her that the loudest voice was the one that said, “He’s the first person to make you feel good, or feel  _anything_  in ages.”

“Tom?”

He turned towards her while she stood in the open doorway of her room. Her eyes reflected the tenuous look across her face, but she attempted to steady her voice.

“Do you want to come in?”

She could see his chest rising and falling against the dim lights of the hallway. His Adam’s apple bobbed from a hard swallow before the words tumbled from his mouth.

 _“Oh, God, yes.”_  Closing the distance quickly between them, he placed his hands on either side of her face. Capturing her mouth in another passionate kiss, he backed her into her room; the door closing with a  _slam_  as he pushed it with his leg.

 


	5. Chapter 5

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Noelle finds comfort in Toms arms following the shocking news of her ex. How will she manage her life in Castle Combe with Tom now vying for her affections?
> 
> This chapter is NSFW. 
> 
> I hope the length of this chapter makes up for the wait. Comments, thoughts and love are always welcome!

[   
](http://crescent-moon-rising.tumblr.com/post/100949964974/the-night-is-darkest-before-the-dawn-chapter-4)

Noelle heard the door close, but it was muffled against the  _thump, thump, thump_  in her ears. Tom’s hands remained on her face. His thumbs glanced across her cheeks, soft skin against her own. She could feel her hands drape across his neck and fall to the top of his back. His muscles, barely hidden by his gray sweater, rose to meet Noelle's fingers as she pressed against them.

Her lips were ignited by Tom’s, exponentially more than in their first kiss. The hunger built inside, a desperate need to feel his hands on her. The hints of the woodsy liquor he had before they left the pub lingered on his tongue. Noelle enjoyed the slight burn as it danced into her mouth, relishing in its taste and sensation.

She pulled him closer to her, her hands digging into the fabric. A dizzy, almost lightheaded, feeling took over as she couldn't find enough air in her lungs. Reluctantly, she pulled away from Tom's mouth, and he immediately found her neck. The resulting weakness in her knees was fueled from the heat of his mouth and tongue.

Her hands went to his shirt, partially, to grasp his muscle to remain upright. She found her fingers tucking into the fabrics, finding his skin heated and beginning to perspire. She had imagined what Tom looked like without those tight shirts he wore before suiting up into his uniform. She found herself shaking with a heady rush she hadn't felt in forever.

The brief hesitation she felt before Tom was in her room trumped the need that surged within her body. She started to drag her fingers to the buttons of his shirt, fumbling to open them. Tom pulled away from her skin, his mouth against her ear. She couldn't help herself as she brushed her hips onto his, prompting a breathless groan from the gentleman.

“Noelle," he began, his voice halting. The rest of his statement threatened to fall off of his tongue but held on by a thread. Noelle wasn't used to hearing him like this, the man who was usually so confident and commanding. Here he was, though, his hands holding her forearms attempting to keep them steady against his shirt.

Their noses leaned against each other, although Noelle kept her eyes averted from his gaze. She didn't respond to his voice as he said her name again. She went to quiet him with her mouth, and he managed to avoid it. A stilted breath escaped her lips in frustration.

"Noelle, maybe...should we stop?"

She only had to think for a moment, "No. No, Tom, please.  _Please_ ,  _don't_." She could only focus on his lips, the pink skin beginning to darken from their intense kiss.

Their breaths intermingled together, but Noelle could only see her chest rise and fall in the depths of her periphery. Eyes full of trepidation, she brought them to his face, looking for the sign he would leave. However, all that she saw were his cobalt eyes searching hers, staring deep into the depths of her mind. One of his hands left her arm and rested against her face. His palm on her cheek, fingers dancing through chestnut curls.

Her lip was becoming sore from how long she was pressing against it with her teeth.  _Oh, God, he thinks I'm desperate_. She was about to turn from his gaze when she was pulled back against his mouth. The grip on her hair tightened, a small squeak from her mouth muffled against his lips and tongue.

With a grunt, he pulled her hips against the rough fabric of his jeans. They moved deeper into the room, Noelle trying to keep with his pace. It was a short trip to her bed, his legs hitting the mattress first. Their mouths connected, Tom’s tongue placed constant pressure against Noelle’s mouth. She realized that he was as good at what he did with the aid from his precise control of that muscle.

Fingers roamed from their waists towards the clothing on their upper bodies. Buttons were fumbled and cloth pulled against skin until they were both naked from the waist up, sans Noelle’s bra. That prompted Tom to pull away to view her body.

Towering over her, now that she was without her shoes, Tom had to bend to match his forehead against Noelle's. His hands glanced across her skin, touching the lace gingerly. She could hear him mutter, a groan in his voice, “ _Christ_ ,” before his mouth was running down her neck, stopping at her collarbone.

Her hands remained against his arms as he continued his assault against her skin, biting and sucking his way to her breasts. One hand massaged one while he brought the other into his mouth. Noelle was glad his free hand pressed against the small of her back, which was the only support from her collapsing to the floor.

It had been months since she’d been intimate with a man, and even longer than someone that had ignited any desire within her. The last months with Edmund had been a frigid hell. In the aftermath, she craved the isolation of her cozy flat and bed. Being alone was good, it was safe. There was no chance of her comfortable sanctuary’s silence to break her into a million pieces.

As her body began to slip down towards him, Tom moved his mouth up the other side of her neck. His lips dragged up her ear, the heat of his mouth dancing across the skin. “Come here,” he growled and turned her onto the bed.

With a tiny bounce, her back fell against the mattress, Tom’s body quickly covering hers. His hands ran along the soft underneath of her arms as he pressed them down. He returned back to her neck and jawline, Noelle realizing that was where she made the most noises in response to his actions.

Noelle felt the hesitation, the reservation rising to the surface. Her nerves continued to hold tight, concerns over her body, her voice. Was she too loud, or too plain to him? While her mind wandered, she realized Tom's hands roamed up her back, unfastening her bra. Instinctively, her hands flew upwards, covering herself.

She heard him hum under his breath as his hands found hers and gently pressed them against the comforter. “No, I need to see you. God, I need to see your body, Noelle.” His words came out in spurts, pausing until she was fully unclothed. One knee rested between her legs, the other on the outside of her body. Noelle closed her eyes but she could still feel his gaze along her exposed skin.

“You’re beautiful, darling. A body made for worship,” came the whisper by her collarbone, causing her to react to his proximity. His mouth found the side of her face, lips dragging against her ear, her cheeks, to her mouth.

“Noelle, look at me,” he said before joining their lips once more. His hands and fingers were dancing against her skin from the curve of her breasts down to her navel and the skin underneath. He played with the buttons of her jeans, slowly unhooking them as she found his eyes once more.

He broke away, licking his bottom lip as he stared into her eyes. His fingers looped into the waistband, beginning to pull them downwards. The voice she knew, the one that commanded her in the past, returned.

"Do not hold back. You need to let yourself go, tonight.” Noelle could feel her mouth becoming dry, being open for far too long.

He punctuated his statement with a  _whoosh_  of her pants being tossed to the ground. Sliding off the mattress, he pulled her to the edge. He moved against her skin, and began to sink between her legs. As realization set in, so did her arousal against every heated part of her skin.

His mouth against the inner part of her thigh, the sensitive and muscular area, elicited the first of her loud moans. She could feel his smile as it pressed against her skin. As he continued to cover his mouth around her legs, his fingers looped into her underwear; soon joining her clothes on the floor.

Eyes pressed shut, her fingers grasped handfuls of the fluffy comforter and sheets underneath her nails. She anticipated the sensation she knew was forthcoming. However, she was not expecting the feel of his breath, lightly flowing against her most sensitive skin. It caused her back to arch and her arms to dig more into the bed.

When he finally did glance his tongue against her, she could feel the fire roar forth from her body. It was as if she was a lit explosive and burning towards her detonation. Noelle confirmed another assumption she had of Tom. His tongue was not only skilled in his ability to be a loquacious individual.

One hand grazed along the outside of her thigh, resting against her behind and hip. While Tom worked around her outer and inner folds, his other hand moved up from her ankle to her knee and above. She felt her breaths increase even more as she felt his thin fingers move around the already soaked skin of her core.

“ _Oh, God_ ,” she moaned as she felt his fingers drag inside of her. Tom hummed against her skin, in appreciation, approval of her reactions. One leg looped over his shoulder and her hand found it’s way into his hair. He was moving his mouth, lips and tongue over every inch of her and she gasped and thrust forward. As his fingers moved to the deeper spots inside of her, he found an area that she had long forgotten. It took little from the ministrations of his fingers and tongue in tandem with each other to cause her to fall over the edge.

Tugging against the curls of his head, she pulled him closer as she vibrated against his mouth. Her gasps and moans collectively rolled together. He had accomplished his request, Noelle allowing her body and voice to demonstrate her praises. She felt embarrassed as to how quickly it all happened, knowing it was her long drought to blame.

Feeling returned as the light kisses he was placing against her skin registered in her body again. Fingers ran up her hips and to her stomach, hands following against her sides. She finally regained the movement of her own hands and she traced them up his arms and onto his shoulders.

“God, Tom. You certainly know what you’re doing, don't you?”

“I've never had a complaint yet, I’m happy to report.”

“Cocky bastard,” she grumbled. Unaffected by his statement, she pulled on his pants, yanking against the belt and buttons to take them off. Noelle saw Tom pause, looking at her from his side. His last hesitation discarded, he assisted her by removing all clothing from his lower half. Before he dropped the jeans, he found his wallet for a condom.

Watching him fix the plastic against his erect member, Noelle backed up onto the bed using her elbows. While she watched him, their eyes met and she felt a smile ran across her lips. She allowed one of her hands to drop between her legs and graze against the swollen, but still highly aroused, skin. Tom’s mouth dropped open and a low groan went past his lips.

He climbed back onto the bed, leaning over her body again, this time holding himself against her fingers at her entrance. “Oh my God, Noelle,” he grumbled against the skin of her breasts, pulling one nipple into his mouth. Noelle’s hands laced around his head and hair. With a sigh, Tom pushed inside of her.

Praising his patience, Noelle adjusted to his length, sliding under his strong muscles. Her legs wrapped around his waist, pulling him deeper. Tom began to slowly thrust against Noelle’s body, dragging himself in and out. Her gasps picked up with Tom’s movements, feeling the delightful push and pull over and over.

His fingers twirled through her hair, pulling on her dampened curls, bringing her to his mouth. She could taste remnants of her own arousal on his lips and swirling her tongue around him, a grunt rumbling through his throat.

They broke apart, voices becoming louder and longer. Noelle’s hands remained on the curve of his backside, encouraging him to continue moving deeper into her body. It wasn't lost how he was affecting her, Noelle slowly feeling her body melt into the mattress. She couldn't open her eyes, feeling the white hot flashes that dragged across her blackened vision.

He was bringing her to that spot again, where she lost her breath and her feet began to curl under her legs. Reaching up, Noelle reciprocated her hunger with her mouth on his neck. Tom groaned from the force, making Noelle suck and bite harder.

Without pretense, she grabbed his face to kiss him and it was all she needed to crash against his body once more. On release, his name flowed like honey against her lips.

As she tightened her body against Tom’s she felt him pulse against her and with a loud groan, murmured curses hissed under his breath. When his thrusts slowed, she sighed against his mouth, holding him flush against her already heated skin.

He kissed under her ear, down to her jaw before his kiss ended at her mouth. She opened her eyes to find him already staring at her. He was searching her face, looking for her response. Noelle kissed him again, entreating his tongue to hers. She felt his hands wind against her back, maintaining the heat between them.

“I think…I think sleep is good idea right now. Would you stay?” she gasped. Tom nodded, a small smile forming on his mouth. They rolled under the sheets of the hotel bed and Tom grabbed Noelle, holding her against him. His hands roamed her back, tracing a pattern on the curve of her hips.

She found her eyes closing against his skin. She faded fast from their exhaustive entanglement, but her own mental anguish of the evening. She thought she heard him say her name, but she was not about to attempt a conversation. She barely heard her own voice before she drifted off into unconsciousness.

"Good night, Tom," she whispered.

***************************************************

Noelle recognized the familiar classical music floating through the room. The sound was coming from somewhere in her jeans pocket which was in the haphazard array of clothes scattered throughout her room. She sat up in her bed, jumping involuntarily as Tom's arm fell from her body. The sudden upright movement threw her head into overdrive and she felt the waves of pain roll across her scalp.

_How long has it been going off? Already this morning is off to a roaring start._

Dropping her head into her hands, she could not hold back the groan that escaped her lips. Tom began to stir, prompting Noelle to hop out of the bed. Quickly tiptoeing across the carpeting, she fished out her mobile, shutting off the alarm.

The full size bed was not accommodating for Tom's body; one arm draped down the side with his feet hanging off the edge. The white cotton sheet stopped right at the dip in his back, allowing his upper torso to be in full view. Noelle found herself staring at him mesmerized, watching his chest rise up and down against the mattress.

She plopped onto the floor, surrounded by various articles of clothing. Checking the time, panic shot through her body. Call for filming commenced in a little over an hour. It was the same for the gentleman who was still asleep in her bed.

While she had no interest in interacting with Tom at the moment, she had to get him out of her room before cast members began to roam the halls. She grabbed her shirt and underwear and shoved against his back a few times.

"Tom, get up. Call is in an hour, you have to get ready." A response of deep grumbling into one of the pillows met Noelle's ears. Leaving him, she scrambled to find a different set of clothes to wear from the night before. Fumbling through her suitcase, she found a long sleeved shirt that matched the black pants she decided were acceptable to wear.

When he didn't move again, Noelle picked up a pillow from the floor and threw it at his head. "Thomas! You have to get out of here!" Pushing himself up on to his forearms, Noelle could see the slow recognition of prior events unfolding across his eyes.

"Jesus, Noelle. Give me a minute, would you?" As he sat up, the sheet fell across his legs, barely covering his nakedness. Noelle found herself distracted by the sight of his muscles running down his abdomen. They locked eyes, confusion spreading across his face.

He held up his palm as a pause, "Can we take a moment to talk--" The lush undertone of his voice snapped her back to focus.

Patience lost, she cut him off, "You don't have a minute, Tom! I have to get out to the prep tent and set up to apply  _your_  makeup, remember? I'm not having you leave here to the view of every member of the cast."

Huffing, she strode over to his clothes, picking up the pieces she recognized and flung them on the bed. Tom hissed curses as she flew past him into the bathroom. The door slammed closed, a little too loud, but Noelle ignored it. With trembling fingers, she set the lock with a click. Grateful for the separation, she held onto the handle and leaned her forehead against the cool metal.

She could make out rustling of clothes, giving her a brief moment of relief.  _He's leaving._  Panic shot down her back, wondering if he would just stroll out onto the hallway, his room one floor up from hers. Noelle had no idea who saw him last night, or saw them leave the pub together. That was a rumor mill she did not want to ignite.

As if he could hear her thoughts, she heard him yell from the outer room, "I'll take the stairs, so you do not have to worry." Noelle couldn't make out anything further, and she took a long sigh. She expected to hear the clang of the outer door upon it's close. When he spoke again, directly behind the bathroom door, she jumped with a squeak.

"I guess I'll see you on the set."

Backing away, she cleared her throat to steady it, "Sounds good. See you there!"

Within a minute, the outer door closed shut. A relieved sigh flowing past her lips, Noelle placed her hands on either side of the porcelain counter top. Waves of her hair flowed over her shoulders as she looked in the mirror. She stared into the chocolate eyes that momentarily seemed foreign to her.

_What the hell have I done?_

***************************************************

Noelle was grateful for not running into Ben or Tom before she was completely set at her station. Her eyes ran back and forth among the crowds, hoping that Jeremy would show up first. Her luck was not in her favor as the familiar body wound next to her.

"Good morning," came the familiar voice from her right. Noelle plastered a bright smile against her face and threw her arms around her stomach. She ignored the slight frown that was flush in his eyes. Once again, he was in the tight shirt that garnered a few stares from the female cast and crew. Noelle couldn't help but return to the visions of his bare skin under her fingers.

Desperate for a breath, she mumbled, "After you, Captain," and she turned to grab her materials. She realized her hands were shaking, again. She balanced the bottles of foundation in her hands and twirled a brush to steady herself.

Even she couldn't believe the false enthusiasm in her voice, "So, how are you this morning?"

Tom stared at the line of horses parading down the street to the filming. The clopping of their hooves resounded around the makeup tent.

He monotoned, "Fine, Noelle. How are you?"

She didn't respond, pushing forward to work on his face and jawline. They remained in an uneasy silence, Noelle quickly setting the makeup across his face. Tom’s gaze focused straight ahead, refusing to make eye contact with her.

As she moved to the opposite side of his face, she noticed the small mark at the bottom of his neck. She bit her lip, as the memory flashed through her mind. Grabbing a thicker cover up, she dabbed across his skin with her fingers.

"You might want to make sure that's not the only one, you were quite active in that area, last night."

With a sharp intake of breath, she snapped, "Cut it out, Tom. This isn't a joke."

"No? I have to say I find it entirely comical that you walled yourself up in the bathroom this morning. That is, after you threw me out of your room."

"I didn't throw you out, “ she hissed towards her feet.

Anger continued to seep through his words, "Oh? What do you call it when you hurl someone's clothes at them while they're half asleep and tell them to get out? Because, honestly, that sounds pretty unceremonious to me."

She fired back, "We were due here within the hour. Unless you knew another way for us to be here on time, I'd be glad to hear it."

"Talking to me for five minutes would not have made you late, Noelle."

She paused, desperate for a plausible answer. She could only allow her eyes to scan around the area before speaking.

"Wasn't a good time for me, Tom."

"Then when would be a good time, Noelle? Because, we can schedule that right here and now."

Noelle stared at him, his blue eyes fixed directly on hers.

"Later."

"Later," he said with a curt nod of his head. Crossing his legs away from her, a sigh passed his lips as he continued speaking.

”Sure, Noelle. Whatever you say."

Her mouth opened to retort back at him, but another voice interrupted her, "Hey! There you two are, finally!" A look of relief mixed with excitement crossed Benedict's face. Noelle kept her focus on him, attempting to keep her face calm.

"So what happened last night? I feared you both disappeared into the mists of the barren English moors, never to return!"

Turning to Benedict, Tom's spoke without inflection. "Noelle left us last night because she was not feeling well. I walked her to the hotel."

Ben's face fell as he put an arm around her shoulder, "You okay, darling girl?" After she nodded, he motioned to Tom, "Did this jerk ensure your well-being and personal safety? God knows, he’s liable to draw you into some debauchery in his presence."

Tom loudly cleared his throat  and Noelle bit her lip, hoping that the flames across her face weren't entirely visible.

"Yes, it was fine. I’m so sorry I missed you last night. It seems I now have two gentlemen to keep me in check." An excited smile ran across Benedict's face at her admission.

"Excellent! Good show, Tom. Apparently, I've taught you well." He threw a thumb's up in his friend's direction, and Tom responded in kind. Ben didn’t notice Tom’s face never displayed the enthusiasm present in Benedict’s features.

Clapping his hands, he surveyed the area, "Well, I have to get into my uniform, but let's catch up, later? I have to fill you both in on  _Tinker, Tailor_. I am so excited we can finally discuss it."

For the first time that day, Noelle found a genuine smile crossing her lips, "Sounds good, Ben. Looking forward to it."

He flicked his fingers across Tom's shoulder as he strode around Noelle's station. "Get yourself proper, would you? You're distracting every woman around here with that physique in this tight shirt."

Once Benedict was gone, Noelle turned to see Tom bolt out of her chair without another word. She was about to call him back before Jeremy had slid by her. His infectious smile had spread across his lips and his eyes were already twinkling from excitement.

"Hey, Noelle! You ready for me?" he asked, arms spread wide at his sides.

With a quick glance over her shoulder, she saw Tom's golden curls as he disappeared into the crowds, headed off to the costuming tent. Facing Jeremy, she willed herself into the happy countenance she had mastered so well.

"Absolutely, sweetheart."

***************************************************

Noelle walked back and forth along the cobblestone streets of Castle Combe, waiting for the call to return to set. The area was full of extras, horses and the soldiers preparing to take over the area.

Every now and again, she would scan through her emails and websites on her phone. She hated even writing his name, but she searched the press sites for articles on Edmund. It was inevitable that the news would leak soon, if not preempting some ridiculous announcement from him.

It was a distraction, and a good one, from the thoughts and sounds of the night before. Noelle kept hearing his voice, feeling Tom's fingers against her skin. She knew a flush was over her cheeks and it wasn't entirely from the cool morning air. She only hoped she could keep her focus, and not slide into a moment that would give away any of the passion between them.

She was so engrossed in her mobile, she never heard her crew-mates moving towards their assigned actors. Looking up, she saw the flow of actors and crew milling around the area. Grabbing her handheld kit, she weaved through to find Tom first. Her hope was to assist him quickly and then move on to Jeremy.

She knew that plan wasn't going to work when she found Tom on the edge of the crush of actors. His arms crossed against his chest, eyes unblinking as he followed Noelle’s body towards him.

"Nice of you to show up. I figured you had ditched me, since that appears to be part of your personality."

Nose flaring in conjunction with her eyes, she hissed, _"Okay. Let's go, Right NOW.”_

Grabbing him by the arm, she pulled them into one of the side streets. The narrow area was covered with large metal cases for the electrical and filming equipment. Pushing him against the stone wall, she could barely catch her breath as her body shook.

"Are you purposely trying to get me into trouble today? Is this a plan to embarrass me to the point I'll leave?"

Arms thrusting, his anger was barely held back from his words, "Neither. I'm trying to determine where your head lies with this, with us. Because, last night, all you wanted was me, but right now you're acting like I have the god damn plague.”

Licking his lips and taking a breath he spat, “So, what is it Noelle?"

She sighed, shaking her head, "I--I don't know. We have to be careful with this! This movie, this--this is a career launching production. It's huge for both of us, and I doubt you want to have it tainted by some rumours floating around.

"Just--just give me a little bit of time to process what happened." She punctuated her sentence with a groan through her fingers resting on her mouth. The aftermath of their illicit evening had only just begun.

She was about to speak again, when Tom's hand grazed over her cheek, resting behind her neck. Noelle's eyes closed at his touch, a gesture that she knew could bring a calm through her body.

"It doesn't all have to be figured out immediately, Noelle. Just acknowledge that you and I shared something last night. Something I think we both enjoyed, thoroughly." The drop in his voice during his last statement was enough to make her breath falter.

He leaned down, his firm hand against her skin while his thumb rubbed her jawline. She wanted nothing more than to press her lips and body against his at that moment. The sounds of footsteps snapped her out of her reverie as crew moved to the supplies. She quickly opened a bottle and spread foundation onto his cheeks. His eyes closed as she worked, pulling away to create appropriate space between them.

The crew members didn't pay much attention to them, grabbing mic covers from a case before leaving. Noelle set Tom's makeup, as fast as she could with her hands still shaking. She nodded to herself, finished with one soldier. She still had her younger cast member to find and polish up.

"I have to find Jeremy," she murmured. Without a word, Tom grabbed her arm and directed her through the crowds. His vantage point over everyone's heads made it easy for him to find her young client within a matter of moments.

Pointing out where the young actor was waiting, Noelle started to leave. Before she did, Tom pulled Noelle backwards, his ear against his mouth. His voice dropped, while the heat of his breath danced on her neck.

”We are furthering this conversation.  _Tonight_ , in your room."

Without a glance backwards, he left her and strode towards the main area of filming. Noelle bit her lip as she waved to Jeremy, a relived grin running across his features. Although she talked with her younger cast member, her smile wasn't from his joking. She couldn't help the flashbacks of the night before from seeping into her mind. She didn't realize it at first, but she felt her skin tingling. She sighed from the heady anticipation of being with Tom again, and alone.


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Noelle is faced with an evening out alongside her best friend and new lover…and Tom is not ready to make things easy for her in any capacity. NSFW. 
> 
> Thank you to everyone who messaged and sent me their thoughts on the last chapter! Keep the thoughts coming, please, they keep me motivated!

_Breathe. Take a deep breath and exhale it out. You can do this, there’s nothing to panic about._

_Well, yes, there are significant issues to make you panic. Such as: you’re meeting up with your best friend, the night after you had amazing sex with his good friend._

_Right now, the three of you are getting together for drinks. You’re going to try and act like nothing happened._

Slamming her hand against her head, she could not stop the groan from escaping her lips. _I’m so screwed, and not in a good way either._

Noelle ceased her pacing and slumped against the side of the building. Her body was adjacent to the doors of the pub of choice for everyone that evening. Apparently, this one was calmer than the establishments for the past few nights. The cast had been partying hard, and rumor had it some of the production assistants had to have conversations with the extras. Too many hungover actors make for a lack of appropriate behavior on set the following day.

Yanking her portable foundation out, she checked her makeup in the small mirror. She brushed away some random hairs and smoothed out the shadow over her eyes.

It was another distraction from getting her to her final destination. She blew out the last of the air in her lungs, shaking her hands out as if the tension would flow out her fingers to the floor.

She was already a few minutes past eight, close to being on time for her standards. Noelle hoped that the gentlemen she was meeting were more prompt than her. In fact, she was hoping Ben was his usual punctual self and she might get in before Tom arrived.

She moved through the bustling pub, waving to some of the actors and cast already entrenched in their drinks. The sounds of glasses clattering and raucous conversation drifted in and out of her ears.

Noelle found Benedict in one of the booths at the back of the dimly lit establishment. She felt the cool air flow through her lungs again in relief at that sight. He was facing away from her, and she ran her fingers through his ginger hair before sitting down across from him.

“Oh, thank goodness it’s you. I was worried one of those darling extras finally dissolved into her insatiable lust for me,” he chuckled while a smirk ran across his face.

Noelle scoffed, regarding her friend, “Well, I mean, how could they? This mass of pure sexuality just oozing everywhere?” Pointing up and down Benedict’s body, both friends dissolved into giggles.

“Listen, I can’t help it if I find myself in such high demand these days. You’re going to have to chase them off with a stick for me, darling girl.” He mimicked the action with his hands, causing Noelle to laugh even more.

She quipped back, “You know, I’m really glad that you’ve been able to keep yourself so grounded in the face of all of this intense fame. I’d hate to see what it will be like when you’re recognized all over the world.”

He scoffed, fanning his fingers out and over his chest, “Are you saying that I am not already? Well, then we need to get to work on that. Quickly, let’s get the PR teams out to promote how I should be sexiest Anglo alive." He banged a fist onto the table, causing Noelle's hands to fly over her mouth as she shook with laughter.

“Well, well, what’s so funny, over here?”

Noelle wondered if her stomach made a sound from its drop onto the floor. She looked up into those pale blue eyes that had been only inches from her face less than twenty-four hours prior. Tom stood at the side of the table, three tall pints balanced in his hands.

Waving his arms outwards, Benedict puffed out his chest. “Oh, Noelle was just saying how incredibly attractive I am and how I need to prepare for the onslaught of media attention.”

One of Tom’s eyebrows rose to the heavens, “Was she now?”

Noelle’s eyes narrowed on Tom, “Yes. Darling Ben seems to believe he is quite the ladies’ man. However, I believe it’s a result of the long-standing saturation of alcohol in his system.” She attempted to keep her breath steady, but it was a losing battle.

Benedict focused firmly on the glasses in Tom’s hands, “Speaking of, thanks man. I’ll get the next round for us. So, hand it over.” Tom gave one glass to Benedict and placed the second in front of Noelle. A grin ran across Toms face, and Noelle could feel her stomach turning into a tightly wound knot.

“Scoot over, Noelle. I have these long legs, and they tend to get  _tangled_  easily.”

_Oh, dear Lord, please help me, tonight._

Noelle ignored the bristle across her skin as she slid down to allow Tom room in the booth. She attempted to keep from touching him, but it was impossible. She was effectively pinned in by him and his aforementioned limbs. Her eyes ran over his to his glass, and the fingers that graced the rim. Those same fingers had danced over her skin and pressed into her flesh while she moaned in appreciation.

“Darling girl?”

She snapped her head up to Benedict, “I’m sorry, Ben. What did you say?” His scrunched up face surprised her, and she grabbed her drink to down some of her pint. She hoped the tall glass covered any redness on her cheeks.

“I was just saying that I am completely floored by the cast on Tinker, Tailor. I mean, being in the same movie with John Hurt and Mark Strong is insane enough. The fact that most of my scenes are going to be with Gary Oldman, I am dumbstruck. As you both well know, that’s saying something.

“Plus they think they are going to score Tom Hardy after he solidifies his contract for the Batman remake.”

Taking a long drink, Benedict finally took a breath, and so did Noelle. “Le Carr is one of the producers, I mean, this is huge.”

Tom leaned back in the booth, keeping his eyes directly on Ben, “That is truly amazing, Benedict. This is going to be another gem for the résumé. Are they going to be keeping to Le Carr’s book? I heard around that he’s willing to be flexible with the screenplay, since they’re keeping him on the set?”

Noelle tried to hear Benedict’s answer but felt the heat flood in her cheeks. The leg that brushed up against hers was a new and unwelcome distraction. Tom’s knee dragged up the outer edge of her knee and thigh, prompting a sharp inhale through Noelle’s nose. She crossed her legs away from Tom, practically dissolving into the wall next to her.

Out of the corner of her eye, she could see the edge of his mouth rise. She leaned forward in the booth, while keeping her body constricted. She focused on twisting her glass in her hands, the amber liquid rolling back and forth in the muted shine of the glass.  
  
Slightly stammering, she jumped in, “S-so, if they keep to the book, your part is pretty integral to the story. I mean, Peter Guillam is the connection between the operation on the outside and the—“

She lost her place as a foot intertwined through her legs to open them again. She tried to kick his limb away, but he had the stronger, and longer, muscles. His foot remained firmly against hers under the table.

“—day to day operations on the inside.” She tried; she desperately tried to keep her hands on her glass and not allow them to find their way around his neck.

_I’m going to kill him. I'm going to murder him and then hide his body behind one of these countryside manors._

Benedict was nodding, listening along. He continued, “Yes, Peter holds the key to the covert investigation and how the story unfolds. I think some of the greatest tension is in his scene when he’s moving the files out of Circus.

“Plus, if they do get Tom Hardy on board, I get to punch him in the face!” His raucous laughter was the distraction Noelle needed.

She was able to move her foot out of Tom’s grip and she slammed her heel against Tom's leg. A stifled groan hit his throat and he blessedly retracted his body.

“It’s quite a British film, wouldn’t you say?” Tom croaked as he pulled a long drink from his beer. Noelle turned to him, noting the flare in his nostrils.

“Ha! They should wrap it in a damn Union Jack for all the Brits running this production!”

Noelle took another small sip, trying to keep a more appropriate pace for her body. She chuckled, “Darling, you’ll be the commensurate British actor: Sherlock, Major Stewart and now Peter Gilliam.”

“Cheers to that!” he said rising his glass to the two opposite them. Both Tom and Noelle raised their glasses to  _clink_  with his.

Tom ran his hand behind his neck, “I swear, the more we have to work with the horses, the more respect I have for the trainers. I’ll be relieved when the race scene films in the next few days.

“I am truly spent.” He smacked his hand against the hard leather of the bench underneath them.

Benedict nodded along, “Yeah, I was talking to Patrick earlier, and he was saying how the training on top of filming has been rough. I mean, I’ve been really lucky that the horses that I’ve been riding…”

Noelle lost her focus again as a set of fingers ran across her thigh. She coughed loudly, slapping her hand against the tabletop. However, neither action ceased Tom’s exploration of her leg underneath the table.

Ben continued talking, completely engrossed in his thoughts on the their equestrian experiences. However, Noelle did not hear a word. Tom’s fingers traced circular patterns against the seam of her jeans. His thumb maintaining constant pressure against the top of her leg.

One of Noelle’s hands dropped down to move Tom’s but his grip tightened and refused to budge. The tips dug into her jeans, and her breath hitched at the sensation.

She reluctantly let his hand go when Benedict turned his attentions back to the two of them. “It’s been such a hectic year. Thing is, it’s not over for either of us?” He pointed at Tom, who nodded along, his fingers continuing to work their way to the middle of Noelle’s thighs.

“Yes, you are right, my friend. We’re both filming our last films of the year right in London.  _Deep Blue Sea_  is scheduled for a few weeks from now. I can’t wait, it’ll end right before Christmas.”

Noelle snapped her head towards Tom, her eyes fiercely stationed on his own.

“Oh, another movie, Tom? Boy, both of you have full dance cards at this point. Think you might need a  _breather_  every now and again?” She practically growled the last of her words.

They fell on deaf ears, as he continued to dance his way upwards, his pinky finally stroking against the heat in her center. A stifled gasp caught in her throat and the glint in Tom’s eyes shone against the lighting.

“No, my dear,” he purred, “I think my stamina is quite extensive. I’ve proven that I can handle various roles and fulfill them to the  _satisfaction_  of many.”

Benedict bust into a howl, causing Noelle to jump. “Jesus, man, think you could throw a few more double entendres in there?” He laughed again, drinking the last of his lager.

“Well, it is most definitely going to be a busy 2011 for all of us.” Benedict sighed between laughs.

Noelle grabbed her drink and downed the remainder in one swallow. Pushing the glass across to Ben, she tried to hide the shaking in her hands. One hand slapped down over Tom’s in an attempt to stop him.

She was wrong. Now, they pressed firmly against the fabric at her core and he was pulsing harder and faster.

_I can hear you laughing under your breath. You will pay for this._

Gasping, her words flew from her mouth, “I am ready for the next round. Would you mind terribly, darling?” Shaking his head Benedict grabbed her glass and stood from the booth.

Tom handed over his glass, “The usual, man. Oh, and don’t spend twenty minutes doing shots over there while we wait!”

Benedict smiled with a wink over his shoulder, “I make no promises, my friends,” and he disappeared into the crowd.

The second he was out of eye sight, Noelle slammed her hands into Tom’s chest. “What the hell is wrong with you?”

“Catching you off guard is quite entertaining, my dear,” he said through laughs and blows against his body. “OW! That hurts!”

“Good! I’m glad! Then you know how I’ve felt for the past hour!”

Her hands flew against him, until he grabbed her and pulled her against his mouth. His tongue dipped into hers, entreating a response. A muffled gasp and groan came from her mouth before Noelle turned her head away.

“Not here! Not where everyone can see us.” She retreated; grateful they were in a darkened section of the pub. Most of the patrons milled around the bar, some centered by the TV’s with the latest football teams playing.

Tom rolled his eyes. “Ugh, you are such a spoilsport. This is far too enjoyable to watch you twist and turn right here.” The low lights of the booth created a dark shadow across his features. Noelle forgot how he was supposed to be a young captain in the movie, his prowess coming forth with a flick of his tongue.

“I told you we’d talk about this tonight.” She could barely get out the words.

“It is tonight, Noelle,” he said, voice dipping down into that low, commanding octave. He played with the buttons on her shirt, fiddling with the soft fabric. Breath caressing her cheek, she felt her head spinning once again.

Noelle managed to escape his grasp, Tom only giving some release to her clothes. She reached into her wallet, keeping the screaming voice of reason at bay.

“Here,” she said shoving her extra room key card into his hand. “How’s that for confirmation that we’ll be discussing this later? You now have the ability to get into my room when you wish. Whatever conversation needs to be had, will do so then.”

Watching Tom twist the card in his fingers, Noelle pleaded, "Benedict is my friend--our friend. He’s having issues with Olivia, plus the new movie coming up, on top of Sherlock debuting next month.

“Let’s not do this here.”

Gliding his finger down the side of her face, he leaned in--almost meeting her lips.

“Last reprieve, Noelle.”

Tom pulled back just as Benedict weaved through the crowd with the next set of drinks for them. Ben never noticed Noelle’s top button on her shirt had come undone as he sat across from his friends.   
****************************  
Noelle sat on her bed, a few hours and a few drinks later. She was happy she kept herself from drinking too much. The idea of having Tom back in her room made her realize she needed to be focused, albeit she was anything but calm in the face of their reunion.

Tom listened to her reason and had ceased his torture for the rest of the night. She knew, though, she was in for it when he did finally make it to her room.

Pacing back and forth, the competing voices ran through her mind.

_Maybe I should just call this all off, it should be a one-time thing, and we leave it at that._

_When was the last time you've felt this good, and laughed this much with another man? You can't deny that when he looks at you your brain gets fuzzy and your heart skips a beat._

_He's Ben's friend, though. How will that affect us? What does this say about me jumping into bed with him so soon after I met him?_

Cursing her aggravation, she barely heard the door unlock. That ever present smirk affixed on his face remained while he watched her against the closed door.

"You know, you're way too wound up, Miss Garguilo. You should learn to relax more." Tilting his head, his eyes narrowed on her as he paced forwards.

She bit her lip before speaking, "I'd be less tense, Mr. Hiddleston, if you didn't find it necessary to play games while we were out this evening." Her hands firm and strong on her hips, she tried to keep her head held high. Her wavering voice deceived her, giving him the go-ahead to continue their banter.

Tom's eyes retained the indigo color as he peered down at Noelle, clearly amused and irritating her even further.

"Pity. I thought you'd like a game or two."

"I like games when they do not involve tossing my world upside down.”

”Oh, I think that's something you did on your own,” his tongue flicked against his lips a hint of his teeth showing against his lips.

_Damn him._

Noelle could feel the aggravation spurring on her lust. She swallowed tightly, taking a deep breath. Staring at him, towering over her, every concern cleared. Consequences damned, she decided reason could leave her room once more.

Pushing out her chest, she began to back him towards the bed. Her golden brown curls flowed against her face, framing her flushed cheeks.

"Is that so? Well, maybe I should show you how games should be played. I do enjoy a good one every now and again when it's with someone whose company I enjoy."

Tom’s grin now expanded into a Cheshire-cat like smile, obviously entranced by the woman in front of him. Stopping at the bed, Tom allowed Noelle to lightly push him so he fell against the mattress. He stretched his arms backwards, tilting on his palms.

His eyes retained the impish glint about them, “Are you saying you like me, Miss Garguilo?”

She stepped in between his expansive limbs, which easily opened to accommodate her body. Noelle’s hands slid across Tom’s chest, covered in the blue collared shirt he appeared to favor. 

Her voice barely rose above a whisper, “Maybe.” She knew her attraction was flowing from her lips, and she had lost all care for any formality. She wanted him, and she had him—for this night, at least.

Running her hands along the tight fabric, she traced lines along his shoulders and down his back. Even in the low lights of the room, Noelle could see that his eyes were roaming over her body. He stopped at the places he paid close attention the last time they were together: her breasts, neck, and her lips.

“Maybe it's clear you like me, as well.”

Tom’s mouth dropped open, tongue glancing over his bottom lip. She pressed further into his body to demonstrate her point. Tom grunted his appreciation.

“Maybe, this doesn't have to be something that causes an issue. You and me; no one else?” Her loaded words prompted a snap of his mouth closed. Noelle straddled his legs with a roll of her hips. She hummed in appreciation at the groan underneath her.

Tom’s voice was hoarse when he finally put coherency to his thoughts, “I think I can handle that for the time being. After all, gives me plenty of opportunity to find new and interesting ways of watching you squirm.”

“Oh, I think that's something that could be achieved on both of our ends.” The last of her caution removed, her hand went down to the hardness underneath her.

Tom hissed, “Enough,” and grabbed her face; capturing her lips against his own. His body cascaded backwards, Noelle resting against his rising chest. Her hands hungrily raced for the buttons of his shirt, pulling the hem out of his jeans. She earned a grunt of satisfaction from Tom, his own hands now roaming under her shirt. He grasped for her skin, molding and caressing her hips and rear.

Fingers tightly wound in his hair, Noelle’s muffled moans spurred a smile on his lips. He kept his hands steady as he moved from her mouth to her ear. Confidence certainly guided him, a man who learned quickly of the body he had in his hands just once before. Tom continued sucking and biting her lobe before paying the same attention to the soft skin behind it.

Once she had Tom's shirt opened, her mouth dragged over the taut skin of his chest. His muscles contracted against the sensations of her lips, her tongue gliding over the indentations of his flesh. Her hands and body moved downwards, paying attention to the area around his navel.

Simultaneously, her hands went to remove his jeans. Her fingers pulled open the belt and slowly dragged the zipper down. Tom’s free hand now found her hair, her name being repeated in reverence to her actions.

Noelle realized it’d been ages since she’d been in this position with another man, but she had lost her inhibition somewhere in their heated banter. Pulling off the remainder of his clothes, she ran her hands up his thighs as she kneeled in front of him.

Tom’s head rose from the comforter, resting on his elbows. When hands found their way to his arousal, his breath audibly hitched. Their eyes caught again, and she smiled.

“Didn’t you say something about being ‘relaxed’?” she purred. His hands flew to his head, running through his hair as he fell backwards. She let her hand flow up the rigid skin, the other lightly dancing along the inside of his thigh.

“Noelle, oh, yes.” Tom moaned. Noelle took a deep breath and ran her lips against him, prompting more pleas to her and the heavens. Her other hand made its way to his erect skin, the softer skin below and began to move in tandem with her mouth's movements.

With feather light pressure, the tip of her tongue flicked around his head and down the shaft. She waited a moment, his member twitching in her hands. When she heard the frustrated growl, she took him fully in her mouth, bringing him against the back of her throat.

The pleas turned to curses and Noelle was satisfied with her own brand of torture. She vacillated back and forth with varying motions of her hands and her mouth. She knew it kept him firmly under her control, a sight that clearly pleased her as well. Heat had pooled between her legs, still clothed but now becoming heavy from her arousal.

“N-Noelle…darling…” she could barely hear his words, a voice that didn’t sound like his own.

His hands had found her shoulders, pulling, grasping at the fabric. “I need you; I need to be inside you…now.” She decided to be compliant with his request, pulling her shirt and bra off and taking off her jeans.

She gasped at the sensation of his mouth against her bare abdomen, as he jumped up to capture her in his arms. She kicked off her undergarments, watching him reach down to find his wallet. One arm remained firmly around her waist, as his tongue traced patterns against her skin.

Finding the item he required, Tom pulled Noelle on top of him on the bed. For the second time in as many nights, their bodies didn’t meet the dimensions, but they worked within the confines of the small are. Tom moved backwards, hands reaching between his legs to affix his condom.

Noelle scrambled to his chest, her hands grasping the sides of his face. Both moaned in each other’s kiss, hungrily taking the other’s breath away. Tom’s hands moved back to Noelle’s body, trying to move her underneath him.

She shook her head, curls shaking back and forth against his face. Pressing her arms into his shoulders, Noelle settled herself onto Tom, prompting both of them to release their breath in loud moans. Her eyes flew shut, trying to drown out any insecurity she had about her body. Her hips began to rock back and forth, pulling upwards before he filled her again.

His hands flew to her hips, controlling their movements. He pushed her body in time, moving up and down, his long fingers digging into her skin. She felt the shriek escape, the knowledge of bruises the next day being promptly forgotten.

She maneuvered to allow him access against her bundle of nerves, pressing ever-so-occasionally against the swollen nub. Every glance prompted another gasp from her, a moan of appreciation to his steady pace.

Tom leaned upwards, tasting her skin. A roll of his mouth and tongue savored her flesh. Noelle felt the tightness building in her abdomen, the feeling of being pulled higher with him. When his lips graced her breasts, she wrapped her hands around his hair, mouth gaped with pleasure.

He returned back to claim her mouth, hands palming her face and in her hair. Noelle moved faster, meeting Tom’s hips and building to the heights they had achieved the night before. His tongue working its usual magic, effectively taking all the air from her lungs.

Gasping for breath, she leaned her forehead against Tom’s. “Oh, god…Tom, God, yes,” poured out; feeling how close she was, right on the edge of tipping over. Her skin was screaming, tense with the anticipation.

“Yes, darling, come for me…come with me,” he groaned, and Noelle felt the coil explode within her. Nails digging into his skin, she clenched around Tom and felt him groan as he crashed with her. Fierce thrusts rocked Noelle’s body and she shuddered from the shockwaves down her legs.

Hungrily grabbing her body, he rolled and pinned her down to the mattress. She lost her breath again, this time at his mouth claiming it easily. Noelle couldn’t help the satisfied moans from his actions, feeling heady and light from just moments beforehand.

Catching their breaths, Tom whispered in her ear, “You’re not going to kick me out again, are you?” A quick puff of breath escaped her nose as her head shook.

Dancing her fingers against the muscles on his shoulders, she sighed, “I guess I’ll allow it, tonight. Just promise me you’ll let me sleep in peace.” She closed her eyes as his mouth flowed down her neck again, light caresses placed at the base and by her pounding arteries.

Finally disentangling himself from her, he winked before heading into the bathroom. “I promise we’ll get  _some_  sleep. I can’t make promises on how much, though."

When he left the room, Noelle sat up and grabbed his shirt from the floor. It still retained the intoxicating scent of a mixture of his sweat and cologne. She wrapped it around herself, and hopped under the covers. Her eyes fluttered shut, allowing her self-satisfied smile to remain as a reminder of a sudden lack of concern for her current situation.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tom and Noelle's hidden romance continues behind closed doors as War Horse moves onto Stratford-Saye. Tom and Benedict's roles near their conclusion, but a massive incident will change the dynamic of the trio in ways none of them could ever have imagined.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you to everyone who is reading and liking this story! There is much more on my tumblr: crescent-moon-rising.tumblr.com.  
> I apologize for the long wait, but this chapter will hopefully be worth it! This is the longest chapter to date, and the longest I've ever written. So, grab a hard drink or some warm tea and settle in. Things are about to get turbulent.

 

 

*************************************

_**Clap Clap**_

"Ladies and gentlemen! I'm only giving these directions once, so I would appreciate it if everyone would settle down and listen!"

The massive tent began to quiet in waves from the front to the back. There were approximately fifty crew and close to that in cast members milling around before the announcement from the vocal, and quite loud, head makeup artist.

"I need every actor who does not have a speaking role to head to costumes immediately. You need to be checked for uniforms within the next twenty minutes. You are then to proceed back here for touchups from your designated artist.

"Actors with speaking roles, you must be set and ready with makeup and prosthetics right now. Then you are to proceed to the smaller costuming trailer which has your uniforms prepared and waiting. This is all in preparation for filming to begin in the next hour."

Pausing for a moment, Polly scanned the crowds, pleased with the relative obedience of the people around her. Facing the silence, she waved her hands in front of her.

"Well then, off you all go!" She headed out towards the back of the tent, her two assistants hot on her heels towards the filming grounds.

Noelle took a long inhale of the cool morning mists before turning to continue the set up at her station. The relative insanity of the day was a result of the increase in cast as well as the change in location. No one seemed to know where they were supposed to be, and an integral scene with a large cast was causing major chaos. Too many people in a small area on the grounds of the Stratfield-Saye House.

Today was filming for the race scene between Thomas, Benedict and Patrick with a massive following behind them. Dozens of horses were being prepped down the road, and the air was thick with dust and makeup as everyone worked against the frenetic pace.

The War Horse cavalry had arrived via a motorcade of buses to Hampshire late the evening prior. Noelle was still trying to remove the sleep from her brain. Even with her eyeliner in a precise frame of her chocolate eyes, the redness was still visible.

It did not help her exhaustion by having someone keeping her occupied during those late evening hours when she should have been sleeping.

Noelle found herself enamored by the man who had taken residence in both her makeup chair and bed. They found themselves entangled against her sheets both nights before the move and again last night in their new accommodations. Every morning had been spent ensuring no one saw the tall gentleman leaving her room.

Placing her brushes against the cool metal of the vanity and it’s bright lights made her remember Tom's voice. She felt a small smile creep up her face upon remembering his body, languidly hanging against her naked torso.

_"The cleaning lady must think I’m sleeping in the bathtub. I haven’t spent a night in there since…uh.. " He started lifting fingers in front of her face._

_Noelle snickered under his bare arm, playing with the fingers draped across her collarbone._

_“Does she know what you look like? Then she most certainly knows you’re sleeping in a bed, just not your own.”_

_He laughed at her words, the low rumble that started deep in his chest and flicked out over his tongue. The same tongue that now captured hers again, the hand around her collarbone moved across her neck to bring her closer to him…._

A voice cleared behind her, pulling her out of her daydream.

The gentleman from her memory was sitting in her chair, once again. One eyebrow cocked high to the heavens in regard to the woman in front of him.

“My goodness, Noelle, what were you thinking about that prompted the smile on your face?” His head tilted to the side, eyes roaming the middle part of her body.

She could not help the tight swallow as one hand ran to her hip, clad in her favorite jeans.

“Never you mind, Mr. Hiddleston,” her words met with his infectious giggles. Her shoulders picked up as she sighed before switching into work mode. Grabbing his foundation colors, she mixed a few on her hands. With the change in temperatures, she needed more comprehensive coverage. Less powder would allow his inner glow to run through the day’s scenes.

She fell into the familiar pattern they’d taken over the past few days, asking him about how he was and how filming was proceeding. Thomas gave Noelle the most basic and simple of answers, considering she knew what he had been doing as of the night before.

As she leaned into his face, focused on his hair and jawline, she felt a brush of a finger under her collared shirt. Taking a long breath, she steadied herself and continued to blend the makeup with her fingers.

When those fingers reached between the pleats of her shirt again, she felt the flush redden her cheeks.

“You’re going to have foundation all over you in about three seconds if you keep that up Mr. Hiddleston,” she whispered.

That infectious laugh, the one that made his tongue peek out from his teeth, drifted up into her ears.

“Oh, are you distracted Miss Garguilo? I’d hate for that to happen, so early in the morning.”

She pulled away, locking eyes with those crystal blues that always seemed to be twinkling. With a sharp inhale and a huff of air, she turned back to her case.

 _Crap, where’s the foundation brush?_  She bent down to search the lower compartments, searching among her supplies, when she heard a low groan from behind.

Peering over her left shoulder, a devilish smile formed as she saw the uncomfortable sigh that rolled over Tom’s body. He changed position in the chair, crossing one leg over the other.

Noelle returned to ‘ _searching_ ’ for the item, which was clearly in her view. Shifting her hips and pausing for another few seconds, she finally rose up.

Tapping the brush against her hand, she mused, “Huh, silly thing. Must have gotten lost in all the others.” Upon looking up, Tom’s half lidded grimace was all the enjoyment she needed.

“Two can play at that game,” she murmured, the tone of her voice dropping several octaves and into dangerous territory. She blew a puff of hot air into his ear as she finished the application on the opposite side. Clearly perturbed, he shifted in his seat, never making eye contact again with her.

Noelle had just finished brushing the powder off his neck and jaw when the call came from the front for the actors to head to costuming. Returning to place her brushes away, she called over her shoulder.

“Have a delightful morning, Captain. Be seeing you on the field.” She could hardly keep the laughter from escaping her mouth as she maintained the half bent position. As she stood upright, she nearly screeched at the mouth right near her ear. Tom pressed his body into hers, for a fleeting second, confirming her suspicions to his situation from earlier.

“I’ll get you for that later, darling,” and he took off for costuming.

Noelle prepped two more actors, currently reduced to one assigned cast member. Jeremy left for Dartmoor for the next round of filming during the change of location. Once finished, she quickly packed up her things and headed across to the filming site.

She weaved through a sea of blue suited soldiers, the golden sun shining against the white accents to each uniform. Hats in their hands and atop their heads, it was a welcome and agreeable change to the repulsive green of the battlefield uniforms. Each actor clearly represented the commensurate English solider and gentleman.

She had almost made it to the main tent when she ran into Polly, already in a near-panic.

“Oh, Noelle! Fantastic, I need you to help Thomas with his uniform.” Noelle soon found her client towering behind Polly with a smirk across his lips.

“P—Polly, I’m not who you should be asking about costumes, I mean…” but she was cut off by her frantic boss.

“Nonsense, dear, I need you to make sure someone gets his chains fixed—look.” Noelle could plainly see they had been pulled and tangled up the front of his chest. One chain was through one of the buttons, looking like he had rolled down the hill.

She nearly opened her mouth to chastise him for being such a mess, but held her tongue. Polly might wonder why she could be so informal with one of the actors, even if it was now well-known that she was good friends with Benedict, and thusly Tom.

“Just take him over to the tent and get a new band and chains, make sure it’s the right size.” Placing a hand on Noelle’s arm she smiled and leaned in, instantly shocking the younger woman.

“I’m asking you because I trust you with him, he needs to be perfect for this scene. Thank you, Noelle.” Instantly snapping into action, Noelle nodded and grabbed Tom’s arm to head off to costuming. As soon as they were out of ear shot, she spoke without looking at him.

“Exactly how did you get this to happen? You look like a five-year old who was left alone for a moment in his dress clothes!”

He snickered under his breath, “Well, Patrick and I were attempting to learn how to get our swords in and out in one smooth movement. Apparently, I got the hilt of mine entangled in my jacket.

“I was convinced I could sheath mine faster than him, but maybe I should ask you your opinion?”

She felt her chest constrict as she tried to speak, “You are incorrigible.”

They finally made it to costumes and Noelle ran to the wall for the sashes, looking for one that would be long enough to fit Tom properly. She searched his size while he followed her throughout. There were only a few left, most being taken for the actors out on the field. She scoured through the piles, Tom’s voice drifting towards her.

“Ben got there just as I left. He’s looking worse for wear.”

Noelle hummed as she checked another stack, “Hungover, again? He deserves it.”

“No, I don’t think so. He looked completely disheveled and in quite a foul mood.”

Noelle shook her head, “He’s got something going on with Olivia. I can bet that has something to do with it. Either that or he’s lacking caffeine in his system.” She pulled one a sash from a pile, and breathed again realizing it was the right size.

“Okay, take off your sword, I’ll refit this one before the producers have a conniption.” The sound of horses hooves on the road picked up around them. Their entrance signaled the upcoming start of action. She knew she had just a moment while they set each actor with their horse.

He tossed his costume pieces onto a table and waited as Noelle slid the new sash onto him, catching where it fastened into place on his shoulders and belt. Suddenly, she was distracted by a pair of hands around her waist, gliding towards her bottom. Noelle let her grin fully cross over her lips.

Peering through her hooded eyes, she growled, “If you continue, you’ll never be dressed. I’m going to rip this gorgeous uniform right off your body.”

For a second, Noelle thought she heard a gasp, and both of them turned their heads.

“Did you hear something?” Tom said under his breath. His cobalt eyes scanned the tent they believed was empty.

Noelle peered back and forth over the stacks of clothes, rows of uniforms and empty hangers strewn about the area. Not seeing any movement, just the flapping of the tent, Noelle turned back to Tom and fixed the rest of his uniform.

“Let’s get out of here,” she said softly.

***********************************

Noelle stepped out of her steaming bathroom. She spent every night hoping she’d removed the dust and hay that infiltrated her hair and skin since filming began. Sitting on the bed while she dried off, she saw her message indicator light on her phone.

_> >Come upstairs, 4820. I have a king bed this time, must be moving up in the world. Tomorrow YOU can have the walk of shame ;)_

Sighing heavily, she knew it was stupid to fight it. Her thoughts when she was not with Tom were about him. When she was around him, she knew she was failing to keep her emotions in check. Her laugh too loud, her smile too wide when working with him. She just hoped no one was paying too much attention and was busy with the major motion picture that was supposed to be their main focus.

However, Thomas and Benedict were only on set for two, maybe three more days.  _This all may be over just as soon as it began._

Further looking at her phone, she saw a voice mail: Gabrielle.

_Oh God, why is my sister calling?_

Pressing the call back button, Noelle closed her eyes and waited for her elder sister’s voice to come across the speaker.

_"Noelle, can you call me back? Mom and Dad are fine, don't get nervous. Just wanted to touch base, haven’t talked to you in a bit. Love you."_

The groan that came from Noelle’s mouth was choked back by her head dipping against the tip of her back.  _This can’t be good. She only calls when she wants something, or there has to be an issue._

She pressed another button and waited. On the third ring the phone clicked.

_“Hey, Noelle, how’s it going on the movie? Having fun?”_

_This is very bad. She’s actually being nice to me._

“It’s going well, I’m going to be here for at least another week and a half. They have me working with two of the principals. Never mind that, however, what’s going on?”

There was a pause on the line.  _Why is everyone doing that when they speak to me?_

_:Well, we happened to be flipping through the channels tonight—wait, do not touch that! Sorry, Noelle, your godson was just ripping the cabinets apart._

_"So, I happened to be flipping through the channels, and apparently—the rumor on one of those silly entertainment shows is that Edmund is engaged."_

Noelle took a sigh of relief. “Yeah, I heard about it already. Marcella called me, she actually saw that—that thing with a ring on her hand. I expect it’s going to make the rounds soon.”

_“Shit honey. I am sorry. I always told you, though, he was no good. You’re never going to be happy with an actor. They’re constantly on location, and since you are as well, you’re never to be in the same place together. Anyway, I’m glad things are working out for you out there in jolly old England. Any plans to return home in the near future?”_

Noelle missed the last statement made by her sister. She was counting down from ten and preparing to repeat the process, when her thoughts were brought to the call again.

_“Noelle! Did I lose you?”_

“No, I’m here Gabby. What did you ask me? Coming home? Yes, if not sooner then I’ll be there for Christmas. Looking forward to seeing everyone again.”  _Thank goodness we’re on the phone and not in person, she’d know right away how horrible a liar I am._

 _“Awesome! I know—Nicholas, put it down! Oh, honey, I have to go. I’m glad you’re okay. We’ll talk soon? Don't forget to call mom and let her know you’re alive sometime!”_  With that, the line went dead.

Feeling every inch of her body constrict, she realized she needed a distraction.

 _I know just where to find the perfect one._  She pulled up her last text message to send a response.

_> >I’m on my way up in ten minutes. Leave the door open._

*******************************

Waiting for the hall to completely clear, she walked with her head down and into Tom’s room. The door was ajar and she closed it quickly behind her. Tossing her bag onto the floor, she sighed from relief.

As her eyes traveled upwards, her mouth dropped. She walked in on Tom, clad in only a towel draped over his jutting hipbones. He had a smaller towel drying off his hair and was just as shocked by her arrival.

"I thought you said ten minutes?" Noelle said moving towards him. Her eyes were clearly focused on the wet and very muscled man in her sights.

"Well, ten minutes for most and ten for you are two different interpretations of time."

Noelle scoffed, “Are you saying I have a problem with lateness?”

Snickering, he wrapped one of the towels over his broad shoulders. Licking his lips, he was clearly enjoying their banter.

“I’m not saying you're good with promptness, that’s for sure.” He stayed his ground as she walked over, a tilt of her head before her hands roamed down his bare chest.

Noelle grazed her teeth over her bottom lip, "I think I have the ability to utilize timeliness when it’s appropriate." With a flick of her fingers, the towel dropped onto the floor, prompting Tom to smile wildly.

"Well, we’re in a  _feisty_  mood this evening."

“I would think that you’d appreciate that as well," she teased, eyes running dark.

She hummed as her tongue dragged over her lips, "Things I’ve gained from working on this movie: punctuality, increased alcohol intake…” Raking her nails against his skin, his mouth dipped down as teeth found the shell of her ear. Her breath picked up at the sensation of his breath, lips barely against her skin.

He jumped in, voice low and strong, “Someone to keep you company at night?

“Hmm, that as well,” her hands grazed around his back as his roamed underneath her shirt. Noelle gasped for air as he crashed against her skin, her pulse pounding as his mouth found her neck.

Fingers laced through his wet hair and Tom immediately went to remove Noelle’s clothing. Glad he finally put his mouth to better use, her hand roamed between his legs-unhindered, and began to stroke his arousal

Tom cursed into her ear as they staggered towards the bed. She tried to push him, but he flipped her onto her back.

_“My room, my rules, Miss.”_

Fingers dug into her sides as she let a long moan roll off her tongue. Noelle’s legs instinctively wound around his hips and she pressed against him for contact. She was desperate to release the need that was already building up inside of her.

Already instinctive, he pulled her jeans off and Noelle praised the moment they were both without clothes. She dragged her swollen flesh against his, shuddering down her body.

He tsk’ed her under his breath, “Why so eager this evening?”

She moaned loudly, “I need you, Tom.”

“In time, darling. All in due time.”

Hands roamed over her heated skin, long and lithe fingers dragging over her hips, knuckles pushing to the inside of her thighs. Her hands went back to his damp hair, pulling it towards her body.

She whimpered as he tongued around her navel, fingers massaging against her sensitive folds. Humming against her skin, he slid one digit inside of her, prompting another gasp. His mouth never moved lower than her hipbones: biting, dragging, sucking-raising the skin and then caressing it with his lips.

She felt lightheaded when another hand moved to her breasts, caressing them with the pads of his fingers. He felt as if he was everywhere on her, and yet she was dragging against the edge of a knife. Just as she would feel the coil closing, his fingers stroking every heightened area, he would change position.

She choked a sob, “Thomas, please.”

"So formal and compliant, I’ll have to remember that for another time."

He released his fingers, scooping one hand behind her back as he dropped his mouth to her collarbone. She felt his other hand at her folds, guiding himself into her. He was taking his time, and making this last for them both.

 _"Relax_ ," he purred in her ear and she responded with another gasp. Eyes closed shut, all she could feel was the snap of his hips against hers, Noelle attempted to maintain his rhythm. She was shaking from the anticipation, from being on the precipice for so long.

Knowingly, he moved one hand under her holding her leg firm against the movement of his own body to hers. She held his face with her hands, palms adjacent his cheeks, looking for the contact, the connection between them.

Her sounds were muffled against him, wanting to keep that connection of their mouths. The lightheaded feeling returned, lack of oxygen and a rush throughout her already light body.

His breaths were hot and fast as he mumbled her name into her ear. Each brush of skin, each pull of his flesh in and out of hers pulling the cord even tighter.

She grasped onto his body, her breath and eyes desperate. Tom forcibly slowed down, pulling against her swollen bud, the pulsing flesh. Pushing her forehead against his, she felt the cry build up from inside her chest and flame outward.

 _"God, yes,"_  and she felt the waves roll over her skin. Tom's last few thrusts followed immediately, his mouth pressed firmly against the sweaty flesh of her neck, panting and gasping for air.

As coherence returned, she opened her mouth to speak, ready to state  she would be allowing the big bed to himself that night. Instead she was met with a slow and passionate kiss. Tom's thumbs caressed her cheekbones, puffs of air gliding on her face as he caught his breath.

"Have dinner with me?"

Taken aback by the question, with his lips so close to hers she couldn't help herself, "Right now?"

He rolled his eyes, "No, silly. When we're both in London."

She knew her jaw went slack, "Um, I--"

"It's dinner, that a big deal for you?" he asked with a raise of his eyebrows.

Her eyes roamed around, trying not to focus against his deep blues. "Um, that sounds like an idea. It would be fun."

Rolling on his side, he pulled her close to him, "Good, then it's a date."

Noelle swallowed hard against his chest, a buzz suddenly perking up in her thoughts. She tried to tell herself to let the feeling go, there was no need to feel concerned, as his breath evened out next to her.

***********************  
The morning sun was finally breaching the thick fog over the manor house, a glow rolling off it's ornate features. Noelle was completing her routine for the day when Mark approached her station.

“Hey, Noelle. What a difference from yesterday, right?”

She shook her head, “I know, thankfully it’s only a few principals and extras.” Taking a deep breath, she looked at him.

“How do you feel that this insanity is almost done for you?”

He shrugged, “I’m gonna miss everyone, it’s been a blast working with this cast. Even Polly has been manageable on most days.

“That reminds me, would you be comfortable if I had your contact information? I would love to keep in touch—have some friends in the industry, you know?”

“Absolutely! I would love that!” she smiled. Reaching into her purse, she noticed her mobile was not turned on.

“Huh, that’s odd,” she mumbled as it lit up. A flash of a memory ran in her mind: she tossed her bag the prior night in Tom’s room.

 _It must have shut off when it hit the floor._  As it began to fully illuminate, her message bar began to  _chime_  consistently.

Missed calls from Benedict, a voicemail from Tracy.  _Tracy, Benedict’s sister?_

The time stamp was at six in the morning, and she immediately pulled it up to play. Her pulse raced as she listened to the scared voice on the line.

_“Noelle, it’s Tracy. I just received a strange message from Benedict. He does not sound right, he was talking odd and clearly upset—definitely drunk. Is he with you right now? Can you please check on him and make sure everything is okay? I am extremely concerned about him. Call me as soon as you can.”_

Her mouth went dry from being open for so long.  Looking up she saw what was probably a similar look on Tom’s face. He ran up to her in his full regalia, barely able to breathe.

“Noelle, have you seen Ben this morning?" he said, straining for air.

"He didn’t make it to costumes, and they’re looking for him right now. He’s needed for the scene,” his voice laced with worry.

She shook her head, “No, I haven’t. But I have a message here from his sister and she received a strange voice mail last night.”

Mark saw one of the other assistants on duty and yelled across, “Stephanie! Have you seen Benedict yet?” She shook her head in the negative.

“Shit,” Tom muttered. “Everyone is waiting on him, including Spielberg.”

Noelle had already pulled up his name on her phone and grabbed her purse.

“I’m going back to the hotel, I’ll check his room—try and stall them as best you can!” She took off into a sprint for the back of the large manor house, praying desperately she could grab a ride to the hotel.

***************  
 _BANG BANG BANG_

“Benedict! You in there? Open the door!” Noelle’s voice was frantic, having tried him several times with no response from the cab into the hotel. She begged one of the staff to escort her in case she needed someone to open the room. She was in a panic, wondering where in the world he could have been.

On the ride to the hotel, Tom phoned to say he found Patrick and relayed that Ben had been at the bar last night. Patrick knew at one point, Benedict left the bar, and never returned. No one thought differently, just that he had headed home to sleep off his inebriation. It was par for the course over the last few nights, but when he did not turn up at call concern spread for his safety.

Noelle turned to the young man next to her, “Please, he's not answering. I need to know if he’s okay!”

The valet shrugged, and made a call on his two-way to the front desk. He needed confirmation to enter the room, since Noelle probably looked like an insane person.

Noelle found herself lightheaded from not being able to catch her breath. Her heart pounding, she wiped the sweat from her face. The muscles in her legs ached in desperate pain from the sprint she ran to get back to the hotel. She felt ill knowing for Benedict to miss call, something was desperately wrong.

Just as the valet searched for his master key, the door cracked open.

“Jesus Christ, Benedict!” Noelle screamed. She mumbled a thanks over her shoulder as she raced into the room. A horrified gasp flew out of her mouth as she viewed the destruction.

If she had not known better, there had been a late night after-party gone wrong in his room. Two tables overturned, lamps lay in shards on the floor. Clothes and papers littered the all over the space; the only upright nightstand graced by an empty bottle of whiskey and a large glass.

Benedict was wearing jeans, and as she realized, nothing else. There was a brown streak on his hand, and she could tell it was dried blood.

Noelle ran up to him, “Ben, you’re bleeding.” As she held his hand he yanked it away and grunted in her direction.

“I’m fine. It stopped a long time ago,” his voice was hoarse, cracked.

“What happened?” she whispered, still looking around the area.

_"Where were you last night?"_

She turned towards his voice, his eyes now upon her. They were completely blood shot, the bluish green turned almost a dark purple. His golden hair matted against his head, more streaks of brown littered his scalp.

She shook her head, “Wh-what?”

“Where were you last night?” he spat, now finding his voice and enunciating every word.

She kept stuttering, “I —I was in my room.” The second the last syllable dropped, he snapped up from the hunched position.

“No, let’s not play games. Where were you last evening, Noelle?”

Frantic, she threw her hands to her sides, “What—what does it matter? What the hell happened to you, Benedict?

Without pretense he mumbled, “Olivia has left me.”

Noelle felt like he hit her, every ounce of air immediately removed from her lungs. A tense silence filled the room as Benedict never took his eyes off Noelle. He sank onto the edge of the bed, the sheets pulled off and piled onto the floor.

Ben began to speak, the only movement from his trembling body.

"James called me last night, having gone by the flat. He knew something was strange, because the lights were all on and doors were open.

"Olivia had already packed up her clothes and things." Benedict's bottom lip quivered, "She nearly passed out when she saw James.

"A car was out front and she was back to pick up a few items. He was completely dumbfounded, and called me to ask what was going on—thinking I had a clue.

"So, I ring Olivia. Only normal to be slightly surprised by the fact that my girlfriend of over a decade had picked up and left while I’m away. She kept saying she was sorry.

"Sorry. Just a word, and it means nothing."

Noelle realized she was rooted to her spot, her breath coming in short spurts. She debated between running up to him and remaining quiet, not sure what would prompt another explosion.

As she slowly crept towards the bed, his eyes flicked up to her, tears beginning to stream downwards. He looked utterly broken, a man who lost his soul.

“Benedict, God…oh, God…I…I’m here. I’m not going anywhere.”

“Now you are,” he sniffed, turning towards the windows. Noelle gingerly sat next to him, every fiber of her being needing to throw her arms around his neck, to give him some type of physical comfort.

“Did she give a reason?” her hands twisted and turned as she pressed against her now frigid fingers.

The laughter that poured forth made Noelle even more frightened. It was hollow, artificial.

“Oh, yes, she certainly did. She realized that she couldn’t take a chance on being stuck with me for the rest of her life. To be pinned into a relationship where she was trapped and be tied to a man who she believes will never be a good husband.

“You see, Olivia was pregnant.”


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The fallout from Benedict’s breakup with his long-time girlfriend causes a chain of events that impacts everyone on set. As their roles come to a close, Noelle finds herself in the midst of a professional opportunity and personal explosion.
> 
> TW: There is discussion of miscarriage and a suicide attempt is mentioned.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you, as always, to everyone who is reading and enjoying this story. That being said, a perfect storm of my own personally difficult period of late and this part of the story makes for quite a rough read. Be prepared, this chapter is not pretty or happy by any means.

 

_“Wh—What?”_  Noelle’s voice was filled with desperation and questioning, unsure of how this could even be possible.

“Yes,” he croaked, the words barely above a whisper, “This was all prompted by her realization that she was pregnant with my child.”

“Was?”

His voice wavered, Noelle noting he was remembering details he probably wanted to forget.

“She was bleeding, more than normal during the month. Apparently it was concerning and she felt incredibly sick. She went by the doctor to get checked out. She had been traveling back and forth to Brussels for a shoot so her timing was off and didn’t realize she was late at first.” He paused, searching for the words he seemed to know but did not want to say out loud.

“The doctor confirmed that she had been pregnant and suffered a miscarriage. It is called a blighted something.” His head dropped into his hands.

Noelle knew what he meant—a blighted ovum. Her sister had one before she became pregnant with Nicholas. The fertilized egg never develops, and results in a miscarriage.

With trepidation, Noelle reached out to Ben’s shoulder. He flinched and pulled away on contact, but she refused to let him ignore her comfort. He relaxed, allowing her hand to rest against his cool skin, allowing the small form of intimacy to remain between them. Benedict spoke again, into his fingers.

“That was when she knew, she couldn’t waste her life waiting for me to be a good partner or husband. We aren’t good for each other, and this was her ‘wake up call’ to that fact.”

“I just don’t get this, Benedict! How could she? I-I know you guys were having trouble, what did she expect from you?”

He lifted his head from his fingers. While his voice raised in volume, frustration laced his words.

“ _To be home._  She expected me to be at home, in London. I do not believe she ever thought I would make it out of small time acting. Maybe she assumed at some point I would settle down and work in theater, being close by and finding something more consistent.

“Olivia wanted security, and apparently, this situation caused her to believe I can not provide that. Therefore, she left, with the belief that nothing I could give her would make things right in her mind.”

Noelle’s eyes raced back and forth, a feeling of her heart pounding against her chest while her free hand balled into a fist. Regarding her friend, she could feel the sobs forming in the back of his throat. Her hand moved back and forth, trying to soothe him.

Benedict was hunched over, practically curling into himself. The swollen skin around his eyes was marked red, mimicking the color inside. Taking a long and halting breath he groaned before attempting to move from the bed. Wobbling on his feet, Noelle jumped to grab him and threw an arm around his waist.

His head turned from her, but Noelle could still smell the strong woodsy scent of whiskey that was permeating through his skin.

“No, you need to rest, Darling. Enough for now, okay—please?” When he turned back to her, she could feel the chill running through the minuscule hints of blue in his eyes. With a nod of his head that was barely perceptible, he appeared to accept a decision in his mind.

They turned around and she guided him to the bed. Like a falling leaf, Benedict collapsed backwards onto the bare mattress. Noelle reached down and pulled the sheets off of the floor. Just before it touched Ben’s skin, he curled into the fetal position. She waited for a response, but all she saw was with the slow rise and fall of his chest.

Grabbing her phone from her back pocket, she sent a quick text to Tom:  _I found him, he’s not well at all. I’ll explain later, can they reshoot tomorrow?_

She pressed send and ran her fingers through the wild, slightly matted curls against her head. Surveying the carnage of the room, she figured she would start with the larger pieces and move to clean the debris that covered the floor.

As she righted the other nightstands, removing the glass and bottle of whiskey to the garbage, her phone chimed for a response.

_“It’s no good. They had to shoot the scene, filming wraps up today and there’s no time left. Ben’s done with the film, they’ll be sending him home.”_

Every curse she could think of ran through her mind, while making a conscious effort not to scream them at the top of her lungs. Her fury raged at the woman at the epicenter of this disaster.

However, not all her anger was directed outwards. As she stood with the whiskey in her hand, all she wanted was to take a long and hard drink. She was about to put the tip of the bottle up to her mouth when her phone chimed once more.

_"I’ll come by your room tonight when we’re done. Are you okay?"_

She closed the phone and turned the ringer off. She turned to her good friend just as a light snore floated from his body. As quietly as possible, she placed the items in the bin and looked for more broken shards that were scattered everywhere.

*****************

Noelle sprinted down the stairs to the small bar in the hotel. After a brief search, she found Polly, along with a few other heads and assistants at the table. At the sound of the buses pulling away from the hotel, Noelle made her way downstairs to find her boss.

Polly pulled a chair from an adjoining table and gave it a pat. As Noelle sat down, she opened her mouth to begin her apology when she was promptly cut off. Another blonde woman was sitting next to Polly, who was motioned to join the conversation.

“Noelle,” Polly grinned, “I do not believe you have met Lois. Lois, this is Noelle Garguilo, she is one of our best artists on the film. Everything you have seen with both Captain Nicholls and Albert is by her hand.” Lois’ smile was genuine, and notes of recognition glanced through her eyes.

“Noelle, well, it is a pleasure to meet you. I have heard so much about the work you have done here on the film. You have an amazing talent and it’s apparent that we’re lucky to have you on board.”

 _Oh. My God. Lois is Lois Burwell, otherwise known as the Academy Award winning makeup director, Lois Burwell._  She was the head of makeup for the entirety of  _War Horse_   and one of Stephen Spielberg’s right hand women. She commanded  _Saving Private Ryan_  and _Braveheart_  (which she won the award) along with countless television shows.

For a moment, Noelle’s jaw went slack and her wide eyes prompted the elder women to laugh under their breaths.

Polly patted her on the shoulder, “It’s okay, Noelle! She doesn’t bite, obviously. It would ruin her lipstick.”

Sputtering, Noelle reached both of her hands out to shake Lois’ hand, “I—I, thank you so much! I am honored by your compliments! I doubt I deserve them.”

Noelle looked over at Polly, who let out a long sigh.  

“Do not let her humble nature fool you, Lois. She is amazing with a brush and her technique is beyond compare. Her confidence shines through when you hand her a palette and a subject.” Noelle nearly passed out, currently hearing praise from someone that caused her team to flee in fear.

Locking eyes again with Lois, Noelle realized she still had Lois’ hand in hers. She retracted her arms quickly and flew back in her seat. Noelle could feel the redness steam across her face.

Lois leaned in to Noelle as a few of the other people at the table began to leave, “Dear, I will be getting your information from Polly. You can be assured, the work you have done here has not been unnoticed, by myself or our Director. I would love to have you with our team again.”

 _Did I pass out and enter an alternate universe? This doesn’t seem like reality anymore._  It took an elbow from Polly before she spoke again.

“Yes, I would love to work with you, absolutely!”

Lois rose from her seat, “Excellent. We do have another film that is currently being tossed around by Stephen. Once we have the rights and place settled, I know who we’ll be calling to be a part of makeup.” Saying goodbye to Polly, she left with two other gentlemen to head to the restaurant.

Polly’s face beamed at Noelle, “Well, dear, apart from that excitement, was there something you needed?”

She breathed in, trying to steady herself, “Yes, I wanted to apologize for my abrupt departure from filming today. Here you are praising me, and I wasn’t able to help with Tom during the changeover from scenes.”

She waved her hand in front of her body, trying to quell the younger woman’s concerns.

“It’s fine, the touch ups were handled by Mark. We managed, Noelle.”

Her face changed as her voice dipped into aggravation, “However, your friend isn’t in a good situation. We had to rework the scene outside the Saye House without him.” Frustration tinged her words, prompting Noelle to jump in to defend him.

“I know—I know, he was incredibly ill. You know Benedict, he would never miss call unless there was an absolute emergency. That was why I had to run back here to the hotel, he was so sick, he could barely function.” She knew the words were pouring forth in a fury, hinting at her exaggeration of the actual events.

A sculpted eyebrow rose slowly, “Well I hope that’s true. The directors know all about the antics that everyone has been participating in after filming ends.”

 _I wonder exactly how much they know has been going on behind closed doors on this movie as well._  She looked back up to Polly, shifting her eyes from her boss to the paintings above the table.

“No, no, it wasn’t that, I assure you.”

Polly grabbed her glass of red wine, swirling as she spoke, “Well, it doesn’t matter anymore. Filming finished today with Tom and Patrick. The remaining crew and cast will be heading off to Dartmoor tomorrow.” She finished it in one swallow and placed it back on the coaster.

“Your packet with the information should be in your hotel room, Noelle. I anticipate seeing you there— _on time_.” Noelle scrambled to her feet as Polly rose from her chair.

“Absolutely, I will check the itinerary and I’ll see you in Dartmoor. Thank you again for this opportunity, and for, well, everything.”

“I’m glad to help you dear.” Pausing to look over Noelle, a knowing glance went through Polly’s eyes.

“You remind me a little of myself when I was your age. Working every opportunity, breaking my back to get myself some recognition.” She looked away, her eyes returning somewhere Noelle did not recognize. She snapped out of it as quickly as she retreated.

“Now, get some rest. We’re going to be battling the elements in the countryside, I can assure you of that.” With a wink, she headed out of the pub to the elevator banks.

Noelle flopped backwards, her legs giving out into the chair. She twirled a lock of her hair as her mind raced through the next twenty four hours.

_If I can get myself and Ben into a car right now, we can make our way back into London before midnight. That will give me enough time to get someone to come and help him tomorrow and then I’ll leave around noon for Dartmoor. I’ll have to check the schedules, there should be something to get me there on time. There’s plenty of cabs in Ben’s neighborhood._

_Speaking of, I should check on him._  She sprinted towards the stairs to the fifth floor.

*************************  
The door opened, and Noelle plastered a smile on her face as she walked through. The room had remained in better condition, after she had cleaned and righted everything back into position. The only changes were the missing lamp and glasses from the mini-bar. Otherwise, all looked copacetic in the room.

The occupant, however, was not back to normalcy. Benedict still had the tinges of red rimming his baby blues. His hair was wet and flopped around his head, a loose t-shirt and baggy pants hung around his hips.

She tried to bring some cheer in her voice, “You showered, that’s good. You look better.”

His voice never changed inflection, “No, I don’t. There’s no point in lying to me, Noelle.”

She halted at the monotone coldness that laced through his words. Swallowing tightly, she spied the luggage on the bed, half open.

“Getting ready to head on…” she paused, knowing ‘home’ really was not the word for his flat anymore.

She coughed to hide the break in her voice, “To London?”

“Yes. Back to the city, since I’ve been dismissed from here.”

“Well”, she said, with an inhale and a clap of her hands, “Let me grab my things. I’m going to call a car for us and we can head on back together. I’ll stay with you tonight, and then tomorrow…”

“What are you doing?”

She stopped pacing, surprised by his question.

“Planning how we’re getting home?”

Shaking his head and closing his lips, he walked towards the bed.

“No, Noelle. We will not be returning together. I’ll be making the trip by myself, thank you.”

She waved her arms, brushing past him to his suitcase. Picking up a shirt, she moved to find room along with his other items, and pushed aside one of his medicine bags.

“It’s not a big deal for me. I’ll get to Dartmoor in time tomorrow. We’ll just take a car together and get you situated and…”

She jumped out of her skin at his sudden outburst.

“No! Are you not hearing me? I am not making any trips with you, tonight or otherwise.”

She searched his face, his anger now bubbling to the surface. She was about to pacify him once more when he moved towards her. Grabbing the shirt from her hands he slammed it into the valise.

“I figured you otherwise engaged while you were here, Noelle. No rush to return to London when you can get another night in, correct?”

Her throat closed, the feeling as if she had hands wrapped around the lean muscles of her neck.

“You never answered my question regarding last night, Noelle. Where were you? Because as much as you’ve said you were in your room, that’s a boldfaced lie.”

It took more than a few moments to finally let air into her lungs. Enough moved through for her to say, “I wasn’t in my room.”

“Because, you were with?” With a wave of his hand, he paused. When Noelle did not answer immediately, he barked again.

“Come on! Say it, I believe I deserve to hear it come from your mouth.”

“Tom,” His name not just an admission, but a dagger in her chest.

Benedict’s lips curled while the words tumbled forth, “That’s right, Thomas. Nice to hear details of my friend’s activities when they’ve been happening under my nose the entire time.”

“It wasn’t—“

He continued over her words, “Does it matter if you slept with him the first night or the third, Noelle? Fact remains, that I’m not an idiot. Although, you both apparently mistook me for one.”

He waited a beat to allow the new shock register in her system. There was a sick giddiness to his statements.

"I could see what the hell was going on, you know. Did you forget that I’ve known you for over a decade? I could see the bumbling, flustering mess you became in his presence. I figured you liked him, and it’s clear he likes you, as well. I mean, the man has prowess in that area.

“Little did I know how far the two of you had taken things with your illicit romance.”

Noelle felt unsteady, the remnants of her stomach churning into a knot. Trying to force it back by pressing on her sides with her hands, she found her voice.

She shot back, “What does it matter if we did? Why do you care?” As they left her mouth, she knew she had just added kerosene to the bonfire.

He roared, “Oh, it matters when it’s  _my friend_  that you’re sleeping with, Noelle! It matters when I find out from a third party that you’re sleeping with  _my friend_  for most of the production!”

The words echoed around her, almost sounding as if he was speaking from miles away.

_How…who?_

He laughed gleefully, but with no mirth, “Trying to determine who ratted you out? I knew she wanted to get back at you for being handed Jeremy as your client, but I had no idea how low she’d stoop to backstabbing you.”

 _Ashley_. Noelle’s eyes closed, as her teeth ground together.

Panic raised, realizing how angry he was at this moment. She never saw him, not in all the years they had been friends, this enraged. He was pacing in front of his bed, shaking his head and staring at the floor. He could have bore through the carpeting if he continued for much longer.

“Benedict, you’re right, I should have told you. I’m sorry, I found out about Edmund getting engaged and I made a mistake. I never meant to hurt you, can’t you see that, Darling?”

The term of endearment seemed to only fuel him even more. He raced up to her, inches from her face. Noelle moved backwards, almost anticipating him knocking into her body.

Benedict growled, “You know, I could have let it all slide. Truthfully, would I have been upset with you. In the end, who am I to say who you end up with in your bed? Doesn’t really matter to me.”

He punctuated his words with a bob of his head, “ _I needed you last night.”_

Benedict ground his teeth, the words barely coming forth, “My world crashed around me and you were nowhere to be found. When I needed you the most, you were gone, shacked up for the night.” He turned around and threw the rest of his clothing while trying to fit all the items inside the small and confined space.

Noelle was shaking her head, the loose curls bouncing off her chin, “Ben, please! I’m sorry, can’t you see that?”

“I’m sure you are, Noelle. Right now, I need to get out of here and away from you.”

 _"What_?” She did not believe the words formed, and she was not sure she even spoke. She felt as if she had been hit with a two-by-four.

 _Slamming_  the bag shut, he zipped it and held the handle without looking up.

“I’m going back to London, alone. I need time to think and figure out what I’m doing with the flat and getting ready for this next movie.”

She grabbed his arm, and the sob finally escaped when he shrugged her off. As he walked towards the doors, she felt the tears begin to form in her eyes.

_No, I can’t lose Benedict, please…_

“Benedict! After-after everything you would turn your back on me now? After everything we have been through?” It was a last ditch effort, clawing for something to change his mind.

Defeat reigned his words as he spoke towards the closed door, “You’re right, Noelle. The night in Los Angeles? The night that you went on a bender in a hotel room and decided that taking those pills would be a great idea? Remember that? Who did you call?”

Her cheeks were now fully dampened, the sobs choking her breath. His f rage was barely contained through his words.

“Who was the one that found you and got you help that night?”

He turned towards her, tears brimming in his own eyes and threatening to fall.

“But you couldn’t do it for me, could you?” With a slight twist of his head and sharp inhale he opened the door.

He spoke over his shoulder, never looking back, “Goodbye, Noelle.” The light disappeared as the door closed with a  _slam_.

Noelle collapsed to the cheap and rough carpeting underneath her feet. Her hands tried to grasp onto something as her body shook and broke under the strain of the howl that proceeded her cries. She collapsed into her body, her hands soaked immediately by her tears.

*************************  
Noelle was so engrossed with checking to see if she had all her clothes, she never heard the knocking at her door. Realizing Thomas could see she was inside, she opened the door and turned back around to finish her task.

His voice was worried, and slightly irritated, “What is going on? I’ve been calling and texting you for hours. Where have you been?”

“Downstairs, packing,” she mumbled, still not looking at him.

“I tried ringing Benedict as well, he’s not in his room.”

 _Do not cry again._  “He left already,” her voice breaking on the last syllable.

She felt him at her shoulder, “Noelle, what’s going on?”

Still not moving from her task she snapped, “Now is not the right time, Thomas.”

“You say that frequently, you know. Not everyone is on your schedule.” When his words were met again with silence, he placed a hand on her shoulder and turned her to him. Her hair flowed in front of her face and she brushed it away.

“Noelle!”

She shoved his arm brusquely, “What? He’s left, Tom. He went home, to London, to figure out what the hell he is going to do with his life. Hoping he’s not totally fucked for his next role because of what happened today.”

Surveying her half open bags, Tom’s words were halting, confused.

“I’m sure they’ll understand. Noelle, what is going on with you? You said you were leaving for Dartmoor tomorrow.”

“Well, plans change. Things change, I guess.”

His hand went back out to her arm, “You’re not making sense, Noelle.”

“I’m leaving. Right now.” She zipped up one bag and pulled her makeup case to the bed. Opening it, she started surveying the brushes and foundation bottles, trying to hold back her reaction to the shock and sadness in his voice.

“What? Why?” His hand retracted slowly.

His voice dropped into a murmur, “Were you even going to tell me you were leaving?”

_You don’t want the answer to that, believe me._

"Noelle," he growled.  _There’s the anger, that’s what I needed._

She pushed forward with her plan, “I’m leaving because I’m done here. This part of the job is finished and I have nothing left for me.”

Shaking his head, his deep blue eyes focused on the floor, “What about us?”

“There is no ‘us’ Tom.”

Noelle tried not to look at his face, but she heard the release of his breath. She knew that his mouth had dropped as if she smacked him, open handed. She tried not see her carnage in full force.

Waving her hand and adding lightness into her voice, she snapped the case closed.

“There was a few nights of fun and a good time had by both of us. However, it’s time to face facts that this was just a movie set romance and nothing more.”

Incredulous, he leaned in more to her, “Noelle, you aren’t serious? I mean, it wasn’t just sex to me. You’re much more—“

“Honestly, do you really believe that?” she asked, finding the courage to face him.

“Do think you’d feel that strongly if we hadn’t had amazing sex?”

Every fiber, every inch of her skin crawled. She held back her breaths and tears as the words poured forth. Noelle blindly raced forward, crashing through the hurt and anger and frustration that raged in her system.

“Listen, if it wasn’t for the fact that my ex got engaged, I doubt any of this would have happened between us.”  _Boom_  went the first hammer.

There was a choke at the beginning his words, one she wished she never heard, “How long have you known?”

“Since the night after you chased me from the pub.”

“The first night we slept together,” the realization clicking like chambers in a lock. Tom’s shoulders dropped towards his back, his hands falling against his thighs.

“So, that’s all this was, Noelle? You used me for your amusement?”

“I’m afraid so, Thomas.”  _Boom_  went the second hammer.

She fiddled with her bag, watching her tears as they dropped on the comforter. They bled into the flowered pattern, turning the colors dark and muddy.

“Well, it wasn’t for me,” he said retreating away from Noelle. Once again, another man walked out of her life without a glance backwards. She heard the door slam shut, reverberating against the walls around them.

She grabbed her bags and case and took the stairs down to the front of the hotel. Through the haze of her tears, she spied one of the hired cars in front.

She tapped on the window, “For Garguilo?”

He nodded and began to extract himself from the driver’s chair to help her. Noelle shook her head and grabbed the handle of the back door.

Throwing her bags against the worn fabric of the seating, she slipped in behind the driver.

She handed him the paper with the directions to the set. He peered at her in the rearview, “Is this real? You’re headed to Dartmoor? You know how long—“

Through her fingers, she moaned, “I don’t care how long it’ll take, I don’t care how much it’s going to cost. Just drive and get me as far away from this place as possible.  _Please_.”

He wordlessly turned the engine over and pulled away from the hotel. Thankfully, the sounds of the car thumping on the cobblestone streets muffled the sobbing that emanated from the backseat.

 

 


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Noelle finds the end of 2010 with new and exciting opportunities for her career in 2011. However, personally, she is still devastated by the loss of her best friend…and although she hates to admit it…the loss of Tom, as well.
> 
> If you’re still with me, bless you. I’ll keep writing, hopefully you all will keep reading. We’re ending 2010 in their story, and believe me 2011 will be a momentous year for our duo.

 

_“It’s been all over the place, I mean people are talking about it, sure. The beast got herself all over the mags, giving stupid interviews and going to all the usual places to be seen and photographed. How many times does she need to visit Balenciaga? We all know he refused to work with her, she is so difficult! It’s such media whore-type behavior. No one is taking it serious, but there are the more salacious magazines…”_

Marcella trailed off, but Noelle found herself mute. Lying across her love seat, she gazed at her ceiling, her eyes gliding across the lighting strike cracks along the corners. She had spent the last two months attempting to keep away from this type of information, but it was impossible to ignore. The headlines, the media blitz was everywhere. Even when she stayed away from the websites and gossip shows, it was all over the cover of magazines when she went for a paper.

Her voice brought Noelle back to the conversation,  _“So honey, what’s the word? How was Paris and when are you headed out my way to sunny California?”_

She sighed, sitting up to speak clearly, “It was good. A definite distraction once I finished filming  _War Horse_. I was able to get work at the end of the last week for the Saab and Shimada shows. Thank God for Brandon, he got me in even though my extended period in England kept me out of the New York shows.”

_"Well, Brandon would be smart enough to keep one of his best clients happy, and in demand. I can not tell you how ecstatic we are were that you will be working as part of the crew for Ridley Scott’s new feature. The fact you got on that set over the monstrosity said a great deal to a lot of the insiders. It was buzzing all over the place."_

Noelle’s eyes couldn’t help but fall over her silver case, now back in the lean closet of her flat. She had to clean everything out from the Paris shows, but just did not have the energy. Going nonstop since the end of August had left her physically and mentally exhausted. She had not even left the flat for more than a few grocery items to keep her from starving to death.

_At least, that’s what I’ll keep telling myself._

Noelle tried to sound excited, “I’m still in shock. I mean, the  _Aliens_  prequel, the movie he’s been looking to make for over a decade. We’ll be all over the globe: London, Iceland and possibly Spain.”  _Plus, the fact I am on a set that my ex’s new fling wanted so badly is the icing on the cake._

 _“That’s fabulous, darling!”_  There was a faint sound of the ocean, one that made Noelle feel nostalgic and annoyed all at once. Noelle could imagine Marcella roaming around her massive apartment, overlooking the Pacific Palisades. Flawless hair and dressed to absolute perfection. Marcella had that easygoing Los Angeles lifestyle that was attractive to most people.

_“Now, while I’m thrilled at your burgeoning film experience, lets talk red carpet. Who are you assisting? Jonathan said it looked like you were going to be booked for the Season.”_

“I got confirmation yesterday I will be with Kate Young’s team. She’s styling Natalie Portman and Michelle Williams. I should be flying out pretty soon. I’m thinking after the holidays spent with  _mia familia,_  I will make my way to Los Angeles.

She laughed, having met Noelle’s parents and sisters a few years ago,  _"When you come here, you’re staying with me. No questions, got it, honey?”_

Noelle could feel the relief rushing through her veins. While financially she was not in a dire situation, she was trying to be as cautious as possible. In the past, her money was her own, all her major life expenses had been fronted by Edmund. It was another rapid life lesson that Noelle had to endure a quick learning curve.

Working the fashion shows of Paris, or any Fashion Week for that matter, was generally pro bono. The belief was to allow artists a way to gain traction in the industry. Holding onto her  _War Horse_  check, she was hoping her situation would look up. Having a Spielberg under her belt and the contact of Polly in the industry would hopefully send more lucrative films her way.

While things weren’t finalized, she was hoping that  _Prometheus_  would be the push to get her through the first half of 2011.

“Thanks, Marcella. I really appreciate it. As soon as Brandon gets back to me, I’ll give you the details.”

Clearing her throat, Marcella tentatively spoke, _“So, Benedict and Olivia? What a surprise, I don’t think anyone was expecting that announcement.”_

Noelle felt as if she was hit in her chest, the name already causing tears to form in the corners of her eyes. She relived the intense guilt of her friend and his terrible situation. Although, she had no idea how he was managing, since they had not spoken. His last words to her were ‘ _goodbye_ ' as he walked out of his hotel room back in Stratford Saye.

Marcella continued,  _“I’m glad to hear it was all amicable. That’s Benedict for you, he was always the gentleman and such a sweetheart. Did you have any inkling that there was some issue between them?”_

Noelle wiped her eyes, trying to steady her voice, “Little things here and there. I guess after so long they were able move forward without dramatics.”  _This is so sad, my best friend for over a decade and I have no idea what is going on in his life._

“Hey Marcella, I need to get myself into bed soon. As soon as I hear anything, I will text. I promise.”

With a long sigh, Marcella dramatically paused, _“Okay honey, it was good to touch base. I can not wait till you come out here, there will be so many men for you to meet so you can reacquaint yourself with the male anatomy.”_

“ _Marcella_!”

_“Well, you’re not cloistered, Noelle. You are allowed to have some fun these days. Lord knows, five years with Chappers must have kept you from exploring your more adult side.”_

That prompted a hollow laugh from Noelle, “Well, fancy a conversation with my parents and they will assure you that my adult side was fully engaged when I was younger. In fact, they will be happy to tell you all about the debauchery and mayhem I created in lovely New Bedford. Why do you think they were so happy to ship me off to jolly ol’England? They were thrilled to put an ocean between me and my shenanigans.”

_“That was then, this is now. I assure you, there will numerous parties and events during that time that I invited to attend. So, start preparing your game for action.”_

Noelle was finally able to end the conversation, and the room went quiet for a moment. The only audible sound was of the rain pelting against the windows. It was another night, another evening of deciding which DVD to watch for the fortieth time.

Her mind wandered: _You know you’re going to want to spend every night at her house in your pajamas instead of going out. You’ll get dragged along, and then what? Meet some men who will be slightly enamored of an interesting brunette against the multitude of blondes in every room._

There was another voice, however, one that was continuing to drag through her mind. The one that caused the mayhem of two months ago, and got her involved in this mess.

_You know who you would rather spend all night talking and engaged in those adult activities again._

_How the hell did he manage to get into my brain so easily? All those nights together, and as much as you’d like to admit—it was not just the sex. It was the conversations afterwards, the joking around those days in your chair. The lightheaded feeling you got when you saw him walking towards you? The little twinge when he walked away?_

Tom was that jolt that kept rolling through her body. She had yet to find a way to get that nudge to completely disappear. The fateful night when she left for Dartmoor saw the end of many things in Noelle’s life. However, many things remained.

 The feel of his mouth on her skin, the way he said her name, the ability he had to make her laugh when she was tired or in a bad mood…all those memories found their way into her mind.

She felt the springs pop from the worn cushions as she moved to decide on something substantial for her system. One thing was certain, she needed to at least prepare some tea.

As she put the small electric kettle on, looking for her favorite oversized gray mug, she jumped from the knock at her door.

 _Who the hell could that be at this hour?_  Turning the kettle off, she peeked through the keyhole. She nearly yelped, flying backwards from shock.

The brief snap of pain upon seeing his face rushed through her nerves immediately. It took only a moment for her to realize that she  _had_  to open the door, she  _needed_  to hear what he had to say to her.

Benedict stood in her doorway, tentatively holding a crinkled white bag with some to-go cups in a carrier. His blue green eyes remained downwards as he spoke.

“Hello, Noelle. May I come in?” His feet kept moving back and forth, every so often the heels clicking against each other. His raincoat was a little bit wrinkled, as if he’d been sitting on it for a long time.

He mumbled under his breath, “I brought some cookies and tea. It’s been pouring for days now. I thought…” He trailed off, finally looking upwards and searching her face. 

_His hair is straight and long, and blonde. He looks so different, and yet still sad._

Noelle realized she was blocking the doorway, her fingers tapping against the worn interior of the frame. She let the door swing open and held out her arm. As he moved forward, she moved away, allowing him to close the door and follow her to living room area.

Benedict was not exaggerating about the pouring rain, as it showered onto her floor when he removed his coat. Pulling her cardigan tight against her chest, she sat back down again, waiting to see what was the true purpose of his visit.

He handed a cup to her, “It’s how you like it, splash of milk and two sugars. There are dodgers in the bag, your favorites. I think they have strawberry filling…”

She cut him off, “Benedict, you didn’t come here to bring me tea and cookies, did you? Because that could have been done anytime within the last two months.”

His mouth dropped and he rotated his jaw. Her statement apparently threw him off of his game plan. Giving her a sheepish glance, he sat down in a foldout chair with a deep sigh.

“I’ve missed you.”

She felt the tears stinging her eyes at his words. Not able to keep his gaze, she focused solidly on the wooden floor.

He let out a long, shuddering breath before speaking, “I am completely lost. I keep pulling out my phone to text you something or call you when I see something funny. I would pass by here, and walk up the stairs and open the front door. I see things in stores, or go get a coffee and I immediately think of what you would want. It’s only a few minutes in that I realize that I can’t do that because I was a complete and total ass to you.”

That brought her eyes to his once more. He was twisting his paper cup in his hands, brushing against the writing on the side. She didn’t even have to look at it. His was always an Earl Grey with milk, dash of sugar. If they could throw in some Oolong for strength, he would request it.

She knew him like the back of her own hand. It was not surprising that for the past two months, she felt like she had lost a limb. It was a haunting feeling; she should have someone there, a presence that should be attached to her.

She tried her hardest to keep her mouth closed, knowing she needed further explanation from him. With a nod to continue, he shifted in his chair before speaking again.

“What happened at the hotel was completely inexcusable. I’m still having a hard time getting around what Olivia did, and why.

"I’m an adult, at least I think I am, and I should have been able to manage without you. I needed you, and I made some terrible decisions. The whole incident crushed me. I was so beyond reason that I took every emotion, every bit of anger out on you."

Leaning forward, he reached out and then pulled his hands back. A motion as if he thought twice about something. “I said things I should not have said to you, ever. I was deplorable and it was completely unacceptable.”

His last words were the ones to prompt her tears to finally fall. She brought her knees up to her chin to hide part of her face. The worn patches on her jeans became soaked in a matter of moments.

Noelle’s voice returned briefly, if only to say the one thing that had injured her the most in all of this.

"Of everything, Benedict, to bring up that night in L.A? You talk about being beyond reason? To do what I did; you knew the pain I was in that night. I still do not know how I managed to call you. I must have realized, somewhere in my subconscious, that for us to be in the same city, it was a sign.

"You were right in saying that you saved me that night. To throw that in my face as hateful as you were…" she trailed off, a sob choking her throat.   
His own words were halted, muffled against the back of his hand.

“I wish I hadn’t said any of it. It was all my need to hurt someone as badly as I was feeling. I took it out on you, Noelle. There is nothing I can say to change it, or take it back. I need you to know that I will never forgive myself for what happened.

“Honestly, I can’t blame you if you can’t either.

“I had to at least let you know that. I couldn’t go through things without at least telling you how it kills me to know how much I hurt you.”

They stared at each other for a brief moment, Benedict watching as the tears fall from her cheeks. She inhaled with a wipe of her eyes.

“Damn you, bastard,” she whispered, taking a moment while his face fell, a look of fear in his eyes.

“Of course I’m going to forgive you, Benedict. You’re my best friend and I’ll love you forever.”

He placed the cup down and flew over to her, nearly knocking Noelle against the cushions. Benedict’s arms wrapped around her back, a huge sigh escaping his throat. 

“I’ll love you forever too, kiddo.” He sniffed a few times, squeezing her to the point she lost her breath.

The words flew from his mouth, almost as a rush of the relief he probably felt, “I had no one to call and complain about my filming schedule, or the weather, or my mother. Or for anything in that matter, God, these two months  _sucked_!” he said, his voice dropping into his usual sarcastic tone. Noelle laughed, truly the first time in a long time, and pushed him away playfully.

“Well, if we’re going to admit to things, you weren’t the only one that made mistakes. I mean, yes, you were thoroughly in the wrong with your words. However, I should have been up front with what happened between myself and Tom. He is your friend and I should have spoken with you.”

Benedict slid onto the cushion next to her, grabbing hold of her hand, “Why didn’t you, darling girl? Did you think I would have disapproved of it?”

Noelle smiled briefly at his words, hearing her nickname brought a sense of normalcy to her body. Rubbing her eyes, she found her feet bouncing off the floor.

“It was insane, way too much going on that set. I should have been more focused on my work, not engaging in a nightly dalliance with another actor. I guess, I was embarrassed that I was acting so recklessly. The fact that he is your good friend didn’t help matters at all.

“I think, initially, I thought things were going to be just a one or two night thing. It kind of grew out of control from there.

"Well, what happened, you did for protection,” he mumbled while playing with her fingers.

“For yourself, from all the crap that was going on.” He paused, before continuing, “I know about Edmund. I’m sorry, darling girl, that had to sting like a bitch.”

She nodded, again wondering if she would ever be free of hearing that man’s name.

Grabbing his tea again, he looped a leg underneath him, “Anyways, I guess it all worked out in the end. How are things going with Tom? “

She looked over at Benedict, her face contorted, “What do you mean?

"I mean, how are things? I figured the two of you were still dating, I haven’t spoken to him since I left set.” Noelle was so shocked by his words, she did not respond immediately.

"While I’ve been missing my other half," he said with a nudge in her side, "I’ve been incredibly busy. When I got back to the flat, those weeks before  _Tinker Tailor_  starting filming were spent getting the place in order. I’m selling, looking for something new. I’m thinking something near the Heath might be nice, lots of glass, maybe a balcony or two…”

She finally jumped in, “You think we’re still together?”

"Aren’t you?"

"No, Ben. No."

He sputtered, “What happened? I mean, I know things were kind of whirlwind between the two of you. I thought for certain with the both of you in the same city you’d be meeting up. Seemed almost natural, really.”

She focused on the top of her cup, playing with the plastic in her fingers, “Before I left for Dartmoor, I had a conversation with Tom. I thought it would be for the best if we ended things. I thought our relationship shouldn’t have gone any further. I…” she trailed off, remembering the look on Tom’s face that night. The look of being crushed from someone’s words.

She stood up, pacing around the chair and her miniature kitchen table, “I was in no place to be starting a relationship, at all. I mean, I jumped into bed with him after hearing about Edmund. Not the most solid basis.”

Ben’s face cringed, uncomfortable. Noelle apologized, “Sorry, I know you probably didn’t want to hear that. Can’t help the fact that things were kind of focused on bedroom activities between us.”

Sticking out his tongue as if he had eaten sour food, he sighed, “Eh, it’s fine. I could tell you about the women I’ve been ‘ _recuperating_ ' with to even things out?”

"Ugh, no thank you!" she shrieked.

"I guess we’ll have to get used to this then? Now that we’re available? ‘On the market’ I think it’s called?

He scrunched up his nose while shaking his head, “Discussing our new and exciting personal lives?” The two dissolved into laughter, Noelle holding onto the back of the chair for support.

Once they stopped laughing, he smiled. “Well, besides the obvious connection you two have, it must have been more than that.”

Noelle paused, ready to negate everything. Prepared to state that their brief relationship was only a physical release for her.

"There was, Noelle,” Benedict mused. With a huff of breath, she dropped back onto the couch with him.

She met Benedict’s gaze, a smile on his lips, “I know you well enough. You may have been with  _douchebag_  as long as you were, but you’re not the type to be in something just for sex.”

She nodded, thinking about the gentleman who made her laugh so freely.

She couldn’t help the grin on her face when talking about Tom, ”He’s funny, and smart, and has that English charm that I appear to find adorable in my men.” Throwing a small kick into Bens’ leg they both laughed under their breath.

"Why don’t you go and talk to him?"

Noelle rolled her eyes, ”Saying what? ‘Hi, sorry I told you that I used you for your body to keep me warm for a few nights. Interested in some coffee, maybe’?”

"No, you be honest with him. He doesn’t know what happened, what stupidity caused you to act the way you did. Do you want me to talk to him? I could—"

She shook her hands, interjecting, “Oh, no. You are not allowed to fix any more of my problems, thank you very much. I love you Ben, but I have to be an adult. Time to clean up my mess, if I still can.”

Ben opened the bag of cookies and handed one to Noelle before placing one in his mouth.

"In case you’re interested, they’re filming in Belsize Park, pretty much every evening."

She stared at the perfect heart shape framing the ruby red jelly. She laughed to herself at the amount of powdered sugar on them, knowing Benedict asked for a little extra on top.

“I guess it is worth a shot. I could always use my union card to get on the set.” Before popping the cookie in her mouth, she looked up. She found Ben with powdered sugar all over his chin.

"Some things never change, do they?" she smirked as she swiped across his face. He swatted her hand, making Noelle happier than ever.

"However, enough about me…we need to have a conversation about your hair."

  
********  
 _What am I doing here in the middle of the night? I’m going to freeze to death or at the least lose a toe to frostbite._  Noelle bounced in her feet, pushing her hands deeper into the pockets of her wool coat. Watching the bright lights turn on, illuminating the street, she could see where most of the people were milling around.

Being an independent film,  there was little fanfare in regards to the production of  _The Deep Blue Sea_. A few lights, some trucks set for the equipment and the usual crew for the actors. The team was preparing outside of a pub, and she could see an assistant checking for lighting against the glow of the lights inside.

A woman with a headset saw Noelle and walked over, “Miss, can I help you?”

Noelle pulled out her union card, already in a firm grip between her fingers. She gave her prepared speech.

"I’m here for assistance if needed—I was told to wait back here in case they wanted an extra set of hands." She stared straight ahead, hoping her nerves weren’t showing too much.

The assistant looked it over and shrugged, “That’s fine, just hang and I guess they’ll get you. Just try to stay out of the main areas, okay?”

Noelle nodded and hoped that the deep breath she took was not too noticeable. She waited a little longer, watching as people started to spread out and the cameras pulled back from the main doors.

A hush fell as the boom microphones rose above the area. For a moment, she thought the action was going on the inside the establishment, until a tall gentleman in a blazer stormed forth.

She didn’t recognize the darker hair immediately; she had been used to his golden locks for the length of their relationship. However, she could see his statuesque frame and strong jaw as he flew out of the pub. There was a fire in his eyes, an anger she recognized immediately.

Noelle gasped as a woman ran out of the pub after Tom, her black curls pinned down by a red hat on her head. She ran up to Tom, pulling him towards her. She could see the desperation in the woman’s eyes, her fear at his leaving her. Noelle strained to hear what was being said, only raised voices coming across.

It was then she clearly heard Tom’s voice, ringing through the night air, “Oh my God!” Violently moving away from the woman, the directors yelled cut and Tom walked a few paces before stopping a few feet past the scene.

Noelle’s eyes caught his and, for a moment, there was a brief look of recognition on Tom’s face. She was about to smile when Tom’s attention was taken away. The dark haired actress walked over to Tom and slid her hand around his waist. Distracted, he turned away from Noelle, and large smiles encompassed both of their faces.

Noelle recognized the woman as she stepped under one of the floodlights. It was Rachel Weisz, and Noelle was breathless at her stunning beauty. There was a lightness in Tom’s face, a look she knew from before. A look she had received and thought was her own.

Backtracking away from the set, Noelle found her chest becoming tighter, not wanting to turn and face him once more. She found her feet moving quickly, until she was running down the street towards the main roads into the Heath.

_No, this was a waste, a complete waste of time. Why would he want a stupid makeup girl like me? He could have any woman he wanted, that is plain and clear._

As she slowed down to catch her breath and find her bearings, her phone chimed for a text:

_We’re confirmed! Contract is set and you’ll receive the first installment this week! Congratulations, Noelle, this is a huge step for you! Make sure you celebrate, I believe 2011 will be your year! —Brandon_

Tapping the phone against her leg, she followed one of the paths out of the park, holding her coat closed within in her shaking fingers. She knew exactly where she would be celebrating this accomplishment: in her parent’s home, far away from certain Englishmen.


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Working in Los Angeles for the 2011 Academy Awards brings Noelle face to face with a ghost from her past. With Tom in town as well, preparing for The Avengers, their worlds collide almost six months from their broken relationship. However, can they mend things or have others found their way into the mix?

__

Noelle walked along the outer rim of the revelers, searching for either Marcella or someone she knew to relieve her anxiety. Industry parties were always fun for those who were involved in the project, looking for a project, or someone looking for attention. Someone like her was part of the scenery, unnoticeable against the fabulous and wealthy.

Her fingers wound around the crystal wine glass in her hands, crease marks forming against the light condensation on the base. March in Los Angeles was always a toss between relative coolness and sweltering heat, and this year appeared to invite the latter. Attendees were fanning themselves, the air thick from the large amount of people in the space. Noelle scanned the crowd again for the flaxen hair of Marcella, hoping that they would be able to leave the party sometime in the next hour.

She was tired, the aching of it creeping through her bones. The last few days before the Academy Awards and the galas were spiking up all over the town. Teas, brunches, panels, discussions—you name it, the clients were in it. It was all about the publicity, getting names into the voters minds before it all ended in a week. One false move during this tenuous period could cost an actor or actress their golden statuette. For many, an Oscar was the pinnacle of success—a title that would follow them for the rest of their lives and careers. Therefore, a great deal of actors and actresses were walking the fine line of enjoying the stardom but keeping to the rules and regulations of Old Hollywood.

She recognized a few people in the crowd, but had lost the initial awestruck tendency at this stage of her career. Her experiences had shown her what people are like at the first thing in the morning, or hungover in the afternoon. Stylists and makeup artists had the unsaid rule: keep the clients happy, and never divulge their true selves. Many celebrities were quite different from the persona they portrayed in public. Noelle was in no mood to continue any façades tonight.

Fate had brought Noelle to Los Angeles with Michelle Williams this year. Along with her stylist Kate Young, these past few weeks had been a lovely distraction. Michelle had her daughter with her, and they were both incredibly sweet and easygoing. At that moment, as Noelle looked around, Marcella sided up on her right and clinked her glass.

“How goes it this evening, my dear?” she smiled as she looked over the crowd. Without putting effort in, Marcella looked amazing in her low dipped pantsuit and perfectly tousled hair.

Noelle shrugged, “I’m trying, ‘Cell; I am trying. It’s just impossible not to feel like an outsider here. All these gorgeous people and me, just doesn’t fit.”

Her hand warmly wrapped around Noelle’s waist and the two stood watching the revelers in their beautiful dresses and creased tuxedos roam the area. Marcella sighed, with her head to Noelle’s shoulder.

“You do fit in, Noelle. You’re a part of this as much as I am and we both belong here. We may not be the ones on the placards, but we are the background that keeps this machine running.” Her voice changed as she saw a dark brunette enter the room with a sandy blonde on her arm.

“Oh wow, they are back together again,” she mused and Noelle focused on the pair.

“Is that—“ Noelle trailed off.

“Rachel Weisz and Daniel Craig. They were broken up at the end of last year but Daniel made some huge romantic gesture at New Years. There were rumors that they had reunited, but nothing was confirmed. Guess that’s gonna be a big story tomorrow in the papers.”

_So, Tom’s not seeing Rachel? Could it be he’s still single? Is it worth a shot to speak with him? I made such a mess of things, he would want nothing to do with me at this point. Unless? He is in Los Angeles, for Avengers training._

“Honey, I need to make a quick phone call. I’ll be right back?” Noelle hurried to another area away from the dance floor near one of the bars to pull up her contacts.

At the least, she had to let him know what happened before  _that_  night, the night that changed all their futures. Noelle opened her phone, remembering the eight-hour time difference.

_If Benedict’s not awake, maybe he’ll hear the phone ring. They spoke at the beginning of the new year. What if Tom has his phone; should I call him? I just don’t know…_

She was about to hit send on a call to Benedict, when a woman bumped into her. Without warning, Noelle’s drink spilled all over her black lace dress. In response, she heard a laugh that indicated her assailant had a few too many over the course of the evening.

“Damn it! Oh, no!” Noelle screamed, watching the liquid saturate the expensive tea length Marchesa that was on loan. She stormed to the bathrooms, trying to maneuver herself as best as possible in four inch Blahniks. She grabbed a towel from inside the ladies room, desperately holding back her anger.  _Thank God it was white and not red._  As she exited the bathroom, her head stayed down, brushing the lace and hoping she did not carry the scent of a winery.

It was then she heard the voice. A voice she soon wished had not said her name.

_“Noelle? What are you doing here?”_

Before she turned around, she visualized the face that was attached to the scratchy undertones of the man behind her. Holding her breath, her instincts began to pull her chest into her body. The first sight was his bleached blonde curls on top of his light brown hair.

“Edmund.” The name, the sound of it as it was uttered, made her stomach flop in her abdomen.

She tried to stare at his light brown eyes, unflinching, “I’m here for the party, like everyone else.” Instantly, she saw the disdain, the curl of his lips as his eyes roamed her body. He walked towards her, the smell of his favorite Cuban cigars circling around him.

“Oh? With whom would you be here with, Noelle? Did you know I would be here?”

Noelle felt her chest rising and falling faster as she attempted to keep her chin up in the face of his unwavering glare. She felt her fists tighten, holding onto her purse like an anchor against an incoming storm.

Exasperation ran through her words, “No, Edmund, I did not know you would be here, believe me. I’d have let Marcella come on her own.”

“Ah, Marcella, of course, that makes sense. She finds herself invited to all these industry events, press and all. Well, I guess it was nice she let you tag along. Lord knows you did not receive an invitation on your own.”

Her arms dropped to her sides; the feel of her throat running dry, and being unable to swallow. She went to move past him, mumbling, “Excuse me.” He stepped to block her in the hallway, his head dipping down to her level.

“I heard Benedict is currently single, guess that makes things all well and good for the two of you now?”

Even though the fear ran through her veins, she fired back, “How dare you! You were always jealous of him,  _always_. You never understood how he could be a friend to me for all those years. You wished you could be like him, and you know what? You will never be as astounding as he is as an actor, ever!”

The laugh that hissed from his lips was akin to a snake stalking his prey, “Hardly, he’s another skinny hack actor who’ll just fall in line with the rest of the Anglos out there. Congratulations, though, the two of you are perfect together in that state of C-list mediocrity.”

She heard the faint scraping of her feet against the thin carpet. Her tears flowed freely, unable to be held back at the venom that spilled forth. She hearkened back into the memories; the nights of hearing how she had no worth in the movie industry. The hallway went fuzzy and her confidence diminished like a small child in fear.

His frame almost appeared to increase as he backed her into a corner, her body pinned between the wall and his body. The moment froze her; she found her mouth incapable of movement.

He leaned into her face, now inches from her, “I really should thank him, though. It makes me look better; your boy deciding to throw some pity on you,” he said, a glint in his eyes while she cowered in fear.

“Who says that she needs to be pitied?”

Noelle turned to the voice that echoed down the hallway and was followed by heavy entreating footsteps. With a gasp, air filled her lungs once more.

_Thomas? How?_

“Please enlighten me,” he growled, “because she is a highly regarded professional on every level.”

Edmund raised up to his full height, but coming up short to this intruder, “Excuse me, but who the hell are you, now?”

It took Noelle a moment to connect the voice that she intimately knew to the man who presently stood in front of her. Tom’s hair was longer, and black—ink black—as one errant curl dripped downward onto his forehead. He removed his arms from the leather jacket and crossed them in front of his chest.

“I’m Tom and I worked with Noelle on a Spielberg project, one that encompassed more people and knowledge than you’d ever be able to understand in that meager brain of yours. She’s a talented artist that’s caught the eye of directors all over the industry. Noelle belongs here, since she’s working with some of the biggest names who’ll be sitting in that auditorium on Sunday.

“The more important question is: why didn’t Noelle ask if you’ve been pitied to be invited to this party. Especially since you’re not nominated for anything this year, correct, Edmund?”

His eyes narrowed against Tom’s, Noelle seeing his attempt to control his breathing. However, his nose flared with each inhale. Edmund tried, but his snarling glare was no match for the ice cold stance of Tom. It appeared the two ceased blinking for a few seconds and Noelle felt her heart slowing to a stop.

“Another Englishman,” Edmund spat with a shake of his head, “you can’t help it can you, Noelle?” Tom strode forward and Edmund retreated into the wall. Noelle let out a gasp at a sight she had never seen before. Edmund was never intimidated by anyone.

“You should really find a better type,” he hissed with a quick sidestep. Without a glance behind him, he passed Tom and headed back down the hallway into the party. Tom turned to Noelle, reaching for her arm. Before he touched her, he pulled back, sliding it into his jacket pocket.

“Are you all right, Noelle?” he asked, concern replacing the anger that was present only moments earlier.

She nodded, pressing her purse into her stomach and feeling as if life was returning to her body.

“Yes, I’m okay. Thank you for that, I’m not sure what would have happened if…” she trailed off, the tears forming once more.

“He would have berated you until you backed down, making you leave the party. It’s obvious that he’s threatened by your presence here,” Tom murmured.

The firm countenance dissolved, but only for a glance, as he watched Noelle form the corner of his eyes, “How are you?”

She laughed, twisting her purse in her hands, “Well, I  _was_  doing alright, I mean. Keeping busy, heard you were as well.” She opened it to search for a tissue, anything to distract the shaking of her hands.

Tom remained quiet, his eyes focused downwards as Noelle continued, “I knew you were in town, training for ‘that movie’.” The two shared a knowing smile as her eyes rested on his hair, still shocked at it’s color.

“I was hoping I would see you,” the words fell out in a rush, partially from the relief Noelle felt from escaping her nightmare from before.

"You mean that?" he whispered. She couldn’t tell if he was shocked or frustrated by her comment.

Noelle felt her face turn bright red, “Um, well…it was stupid. I know you are busy with training and probably having lots of fun around town. I was only here to work with Kate and then I’m back in London for a film again.”

"It wasn’t stupid."

Noelle felt her heart soar, and then get knocked back into place as Tom continued.

"I mean, I am busy—I’m working out with Scarlett every day, it’s insane. I’m here with her tonight as her date."

“Oh.” It was all Noelle could say, her night having turned into one long and strange occurrence. Tom continued, his words picking up their pace.

“I mean, I’m attending with her. I-I guess I should get back out there.” He frowned and began to walk towards the double doors to the ballroom.

Mumbling under her breath, and moving over her feet against the carpet, “’Course you’re busy. Going from filming Deep Blue Sea and—

“Did you come to the set?” he blurted out, now turning back around to look at Noelle.

Noelle felt her face turn bright crimson. She could not help as she stuttered, tripping over her words.

“I-I did one night. In Belsize Park at—um, you were filming with Rachel.”

“At the pub, that was you!” he said, walking back to her.  _Was there a hint of a smile on his lips?_

As Tom’s long and lean legs closed the distance between them, she wondered: _how many times can one person feel like they want to just disappear? I want to just fade into the carpet and dissolve?_

She could not keep his gaze for long, looking everywhere in the hallway, devoid of pictures or items to keep her attentions.

“Ben told me you were filming, and I thought I’d take a walk one night, maybe I could talk to you. It had been three months since filming, but you—you looked busy and I went home so…” She trailed off, feeling her body shake underneath his proximity.

“I wish you had stayed.”

His eyes, although the coldness remained, sparked a small glimmer of kindness.

She was about to agree with him when Marcella came running down the hallway.

“There you are, my God, Noelle! I just saw that asshole, and he practically spit at me on how I should stop bringing wannabes to these events. Are you okay? Did he hurt you?” Her hands flung around Noelle’s back and a sigh of relief escaped her lips.

Noelle shook her head and looked up, “No, I got lucky. Tom was coming out of the Mens and saw him.”

She brushed some of her hair from her shoulder and went to shake Tom’s hand. Noelle felt the grin expand on her face as Marcella’s cheeks flushed and she began to stutter under Tom’s eye.

“Well, wow, it’s a pleasure to meet you, Tom. I—I thank you so much for helping Noelle.”

Tom nodded along with Marcella,  “I’m just glad I was here, he’s dangerous. That’s apparent, especially when he’s away from everyone’s eyesight.”

"I wholeheartedly agree, I’m not staying one more moment while that beast is roaming inside." Marcella linked her arm into Noelle’s and led her to the elevators. Tom followed for a beat, clearing his throat before he spoke again.

"So, what are your plans for the next few days, Noelle?"

She felt the thumping of her heart, the soaring of every second that she stood in his presence. It all came back to her: the talks, the laughter, the nights in her bed.

She was not used to how he looked at her now. It was tenuous, cautious. Noelle knew he was holding back. She kept herself closed from what she hoped could be mended between them.

Marcella jumped in, “Well, we have the Academy brunch tomorrow at the Hilton. We’re allowed to hang in the back with the rest of the undesirables, care to join us?” Noelle felt her face redden, Marcella’s body turning to Tom’s and the V in her suit opening to show more skin.

Tom rocked on his heels, continually moving as he spoke, “Just so happens that’s where we’re staying this weekend. I’ll check and text you—you have the same number, right?” Noelle tried to contain her smile as she nodded all while pulled by Marcella to the elevators.

"Yes, I do. I hope you can come tomorrow."

"Yes, it’s a plan! Come on honey, I’ll call the car," Marcella sang as she dug around for her phone in her purse. Her head remained down, not noticing Noelle turning as they strode down the hall.

"Bye," she breathed.

***************

"Noelle. Stop fidgeting, you look lovely!"

Noelle had to blush, being told by one of the most gorgeous women in the world that she needed to calm down, was not a good way to start the day. Michelle, Marcella and Noelle in the middle, the three ladies entered the Academy Brunch, immediately facing a wall of people.

Michelle grabbed her table card, and searched for the rest of her cast-mates. Before she left, she brushed a few curls onto Noelle’s shoulder to frame her face. Narrowing her eyes, she leaned in with a mischievous grin.

"Do you see your handsome Englishman anywhere?" Giggles floated around the three women. Noelle looked over the tops of the crowd, not seeing Tom or his newly darkened hair anywhere in sight.

With a sigh, her arms dropped, “No, nothing yet. He texted it was a possibility—depended on their schedule today?”

Marcella saw another one of her co-workers and waved off to say hello to him. Before Michelle headed to her designated table, her arm wrapped around Noelle’s shoulders with a squeeze.

"Listen, if he comes, it’s great! If not, I am sure there are plenty of gorgeous men here who would love to have a mimosa with you, love!" Noelle couldn’t help but blush at the warmth from Michelle. They had become close over the past few weeks, and Noelle was grateful to have another ear and arm for support.

As they separated, Noelle headed over to the far end of the ballroom, her deep blue dress, swishing around her knees. Scanning the crowd once more, she found herself at one of the bars, strategically stationed around the massive space.

_God forbid there be more than ten feet for a celebrity to walk to find another drink of alcohol,_ she snarkily mused.

Resting against the hardwood, she felt the body next to her turn and it was suddenly apparent that a set of eyes were fixed on her. When she turned to meet them, the small bit of bravado she had disappeared in a flash.

A set of mossy green eyes stared right back at her, narrowing on Noelle’s body, lingering over her curves. Unabashedly, he raked his gaze back up to her face. It was combined with a massive grin that practically highlighted all of his teeth.

His voice, that matched those deep set eyes and pulsating charm floated through a laugh, “Well, hello, there.”

Noelle’s voice squeaked, “Hell-hello.” She felt her breath picking up, and she tried to swallow under the man’s eyes which refused to move from her face.

"Well, fancy that. You’re here, and I’m here; look at this travesty. We are both without drinks in our hands." With a wave of his hand, his eyebrow cocked upwards, "May I offer to get one for you—-" he trailed off, a request of her name.  _What is my name?_

Shaking her head, she snapped back into her shoes, “Noelle, Noelle Garguilo.”

"Well, Noelle, Noelle," he mused while laughing under his breath at his own joke, "I’ll grab you a mimosa, is that acceptable?"

Nodding without speaking, she found herself staring at the light hint of stubble that ran across his jawline. The short hairs were akin to the color of leaves in autumn, matching the touseled hair on his head. Mystery man turned away, and with the twist of just one of his fingers, the bartender raced over.

"A mimosa for the lady, and a screwdriver for me—with little orange juice, got it?" his voice dipped down into a rumble that could have been mistaken for a motorcycle engine for it’s delightful purr.

When he handed her the champagne glass, his eyes returned to Noelle’s, watching and taking in her every move. Noelle was more interested in hearing his voice, saying, well-anything.

"Thank you—" Noelle not able to place him immediately. Her brain was taking a long time to process any coherent thought.

He fanned out his fingers of his opposite hand over his chest, while swirling the ice around in his glass, “I am sorry, I should formally introduce myself. I’m Michael Fassbender.” And with a clink against her glass, he took a healthy swig of his vodka tinted with juice.

"Michael Fass—wait! Now, I know who you are," she squealed, as the lights began to turn on, one by one in her brain.

His grumbling laugh with the Cheshire smile returned, “Well, I’m glad you do, my dear. Have you seen some of my work? One of my little movies that’s been floating around?”

"No!" she blurted, a little too quickly. His eyebrow dropped and his mouth opened before he took another drink. Noelle realized what she said and swallowed some of her own bubbly before explaining herself.

"I’m sorry. You’re in the cast for Ridley Scott’s new movie, right? Playing the Android?”

His strong brow furrowed, the smile creeping back in, “Yes, that’s correct. It’s only getting around now about that information, though. Are you a reporter?” It was not a question. Moreover, he sang the words, teasing her.

Noelle shifted on her feet before she explained, ”I’m working on the film as well. I’m a makeup artist, actually, the first assistant for the film.”

His muscular arm leaned against the bar, the sleeve of his button down beginning to strain under the pressure, “Well, isn’t this just a lovely coincidence? I must say, what are the chances of us meeting, Noelle-Noelle?”

A nervous and all too loud laugh escaped Noelle’s body. She should have been embarrassed, but the champagne mixed with not eating for most of the day was rushing to her head. Michael crossed his legs to move closer to her, an amused twinkle flicked through his eyes in response.

She felt the warmth raging through her body as a figure floated into her periphery on the left. She turned to find Thomas, his lean legs clad in black dress pants and a matching waistcoat over a white collared shirt. His eyes roamed back and forth between Noelle and Michael, his jaw rotating while his own champagne glass twirled in his long fingers.

Noelle screamed, “Tom! You did make it!”

"Yes, I did. If you’re busy, however…" he trailed off but Noelle shook her hands and head back and forth.

"No, it’s fine. Michael and I were just discussing the project we’ll both be working on in the next few months." Michael’s eyebrow went up as he stretched his hand out to Tom’s.

"You’re Tom Hiddleston, correct? The bad guy in your series of movies, like me?" 

Tom straightened, while still holding Michael’s hand, ”Yes, I’m Loki for the Avengers, and you’re the young Magneto for X-Men.” Tom’s smile never went past the sides of his lips, ”Nice to finally meet you, apparently we get many of the same scripts our way.”

That laugh returned and Noelle dropped her sights to the carpet, trying not to giggle along with Michael. The moment was blissfully ended when the  _chime_  rang for everyone to return to the tables for the service. Michael stood upright, but wavering just enough for Noelle to catch it. He covered himself by dipping to the scatterbrained woman.

"My dear Noelle, it has been an absolute pleasure. I am very much looking forward to us working together in the near future. Thomas, I wish you an enjoyable afternoon." With that, he left the two, Noelle having to forcibly tear her eyes away from the sight of their former companion as he walked to his chair.

Tom cleared his throat and Noelle’s smile expanded, “I’m so glad you’re here,” she sighed. Noelle realized she was not in the mood to eat anymore. Seeing the glass doors out onto the rear of the hotel property, Noelle tilted her head.

“How do you feel about a walk out of here?” she asked, words pouring out of her mouth. She wanted him alone and without the distractions that tended to interfere.

He nodded without looking at her, “I’d like that, actually.” The two walked out of the ballroom onto the garden paths behind the Hilton.

Both them squinted against the blazing noontime sun, glaring down through a cloudless sky. Noelle kept the half filled glass in her hands as they walked, every now and again catching a glimpse of Tom out of the corner of her eye.

“So,” he spoke, his voice monotone, “you came to the set? Why?”

Taking a deep sigh, Noelle began, “I needed to see you. I—there’s things that I need to say—I need to explain to you. I know so much time has passed, but it should be said.”

Tom stopped on the stone path, the light sounds of children playing in one of the outdoor pools ricocheting around them. Laughter mixed with the sounds of water cascading combined to create a sense of delight.

They stood listening to the lighthearted sounds, mired in their own silence. Noelle realized he was waiting for her explanation; they would not proceed further until he heard her thoughts. Finishing her drink and twisting the glass back and forth between her fingers, she took a deep, cleansing breath.

“What I did, back in Stratford-Saye was wrong. I lied to you, and you didn’t deserve that. I took out on you the pain I was feeling from what happened between myself and Benedict, as well as what happened on hearing about Edmund.”

She stopped speaking, focused on the lush shrubbery that framed the walkways. He made no sound, no words.  Noelle continued with her thoughts.

“I told you that I had no feelings for you because I knew that would be the fastest way to break things between us. The mistake was how I treated you.”

She flicked up her eyes, nervous to see his reaction. He had his head turned, enough so Noelle could not make out his face or his eyes. She could only see his Adam’s apple moving up and down as he breathed.  _Oh well, here goes nothing._

“I’m sorry for everything I said Tom. I never meant—“

“Were you ashamed of us, Noelle? Was that it? Did you feel that we were something that no one should know about, and so when it came to light you immediately ran for cover?” Tom’s voice raised, snapping; the hurt seeping through his words.

“No, not at all, Tom. I …”

“Are you sure? I believe you gave that me pretty good reasoning back in September. I could understand the need to keep things quiet, ensure things remained professional on such an importatnt project. However, it was when I brought up us going out when we were off set, that you balked. I’m not so sure this was all prompted by Benedict or just an easy excuse.”

_So that’s what the hammer feels like when it drops._  “I never thought that, Tom. We-I thought we rushed into all of this. We knew each other for less than two weeks and I jumped into bed with you.”

Tom’s voice was firm, similar to that night in Belsize, “I have to wonder about all those conversations, in and out of your bedroom. Maybe they meant nothing to you, but they meant something to me. The times we talked about family? Our careers? Or were you correct the first time in saying it was nothing but filler for time in between us in your bed?

She shook her head, “Tom, please, that’s not the case.”

“I don’t believe you, Noelle. I think this is to make yourself feel better.” He slammed his hands into his pockets, while his chest rose and fell.

Her lower lip shook and it peppered her speech, “If that’s how you feel, I can’t change it. I am sorry, Tom. You are a wonderful person and I should have given us a chance, the opportunity.

“You were much more than I could have ever hoped to find on that set. I didn’t deserve you then, and I don’t deserve you now. You should know that, Tom. I am sorry.” She turned on her heel and sprinted away from him, tears falling once again.  _It is a good thing I have my hand at makeup, I’d look a right mess if it wasn’t for the waterproof mascara._

As Noelle hit the edge of the patio that framed the hotel pool, she weaved through the large and spacious cabanas for the elite guests. Her heels clicked against the concrete of the garden path, as she picked up her feet. She was about to continue forward when an arm snaked around her waist and yanked her through a set of peach colored curtains.

Before she could protest, Tom’s mouth crashed against hers, his tongue dragging across her bottom lip. The shock wore off as soon as she caught her balance. Noelle placed her glass on top one of the small tables in the cabana and her hands wound around Tom’s neck, grasping at the longer hair.

The moan grew in her chest, soon caught in her throat against Tom’s body. One hand pressed on the small of her back, her breasts flush against the cotton of his shirt. The other held firm and tight against her head, fingers lacing through her hair.

As Noelle’s hands glided from his neck to his collar, her fingers found the topmost button and began to work the fastening, her feet moving backwards. It was as she hit the edge of the lounge chair that Tom broke their embrace and looked away.

“I-I’m sorry, Noelle. I shouldn’t have said those things and kissed you.” As he turned, Noelle grabbed his arm and pressed her mouth against his neck.

“Wait, please. Tom, don’t go.” She could not help the begging, the gasping in her hushed voice. His body froze as Noelle’s hands roamed the muscles of his chest, resting around his waist.

His hand moved one of hers away from his body, but he never released it. In the warm glow of the cabana, Tom’s crystal blue eyes found Noelle’s.

“I’m sorry, but I can’t do this, Noelle. I’m seeing someone else.”

 


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It’s late April of 2011, and Thor is rushing into movie theaters around the globe. When Noelle decides to attend one of the premieres, how will Tom react to her presence?
> 
> There is a *wee* bit of a change to the IRL timeline, but it’s my story and it’s not too far out of reason. Just read and enjoy.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Huge thanks to everyone who has been reading and enjoying this story-your support means the world to me.

 

“Benedict!”

She kept screaming his name, trying to catch his attention. She was pleased to see his hair had returned close to it’s original color: dark auburn. However, it was still long and unkempt. Most of the tendrils remained plastered to his head from sweating profusely under the bright lights and heavy costume. When he spotted the voice, attached to the woman waving to him like an insane person, the smile expanded across his pronounced cheeks.

Noelle kept bouncing in her high heels, waiting for Benedict to make his way to her from the throngs of people congratulating the cast of  _Frankenstein_. The show had been running for two months, and it had already received huge praise from critics and theater-goers alike.

“You made it, darling girl!”

She squealed in his arms, “We finished early at Pinewood. I raced over here in my work clothes and got changed in the taxi. The driver got quite the show.”

“Lucky bastard, I’m sure he did!” he said, laughing against the curls flowing around her shoulders.

Pulling away, he tilted his head, “Come on, lets get back to my room and we can talk in peace!”

They headed off into his dressing room, covered with notes and well wishes from friends and family. Noelle immediately recognized his parent’s and sister’s handwriting on cards with massive bouquets of flowers on his vanity. It was in the corner of his tiny couch that prompted her to smile with pride. The light brown stuffed teddy complete with black stitching she sewn on the face and shoulder sat amongst the cushions.

Removing his heavy overcoat and jacket, he stumbled into his chair with a deep sigh.

“I’m so glad you could be here, it means the world to me that you came.”

“Where else would I be, Benedict?” she smiled. “I’m just happy we’re over at Pinewood, and not yet up in the black and gray desolation of Iceland.”

“I can imagine. They’re filming in Iceland?” She nodded, a despondent turn of her eyes prompting a sigh.

“You have no luck with sets for weather,” Benedict soothed.

With a murmur of assent, she rested on the vanity, “I seem to always find myself in these places with the most depressing climates. Born on the coast of Massachusetts, going to school and living in London, now working in Iceland. I’m surprised it didn’t rain every day we were on  _War Horse_. Honestly, I am lacking in sun and bright skies and it’s starting to drag me down.”

Benedict’s mouth opened with a raise of his eyebrows when the door opened. A horrifyingly grotesque Jonny Lee Miller walked through— although his smile belied the look of a monster. Noelle should have been petrified. Instead, she was entranced at the extensive details on his face. It took a amazing skill in artistry to complete the look of Frankenstein’s creature.

As she waved hello, Noelle could not help herself as she walked to him, her hand stretching out before she pulled back. Remembering her manners, she grinned before asking, “Do you mind?”

“Sure,” he shrugged, “everyone is pretty amazed at how we are transformed every night.”

Her fingers ran down the applications, affixed to his face with plaster and flexible tape. She could see the intricate black and reds, showing the dirt and blood for his mangled flesh.

She didn’t realize how close she was to his face until she felt his breath on her chin. She jumped back, yelping from fright. Benedict roared with laughter.

“Noelle, you sure you don’t want a closer look? You might want to ask Michele’s permission first, you know?”

“I’m so sorry,” she gasped, “This work is so intricate and the makeup has such definition. It must take hours.”

“Four on the days we’re the monster. I think that was one of the most attractive things about this run, the parts are switched so no one is chained permanently to that chair. Although, if we had someone as beautiful as you doing our makeup, I wonder if we might have a change of opinion.”

She rolled her head at his cheeky smile, smacking him in the arm, “No, it doesn’t matter if the artist looks like a model; four hours every day is enough to drive any person insane.”

Touching his face and his neck she murmured, “Clara is doing the makeup? I have to speak with her. This is beautiful. It would love to get her opinion if I ever find myself on a movie that needs wound treatments.”

Jonny smiled as he scratched parts of the prosthetics that were beginning to peel, “She’s amazing, but I need to get this off—it’s driving me mad.” Noelle’s hands flew up as she walked away and Jonny turned to Benedict.

“I am sorry to interrupt, Ben, but I was checking to see if you’re headed out with us later. I think we could all use some drink and unhealthy food tonight.”

“Yeah, that sounds like a plan! Noelle, want to join us?”

She shook her head, “I’m exhausted and I have to go back to Pinewood tomorrow for some touchup scenes. I appreciate it though, thanks guys.” With a wave, Jonny left them, and Benedict relaxed in his chair.

Crossing his long legs, he suggested with a lilt in his voice, “You know where the weather is absolutely sublime this time of year?”

“Hmm?” she mumbled, playing with the brushes on the counter while examining bottles of foundation.

“Rome, I hear, is fabulous.”

She looked up to the mirror and into his shinning, twinkling baby blue eyes.

“Why Benedict, what would have you bring up Italy? For that matter, the historic city of Rome?” Noelle asked, knowing the answer before the words crossed his lips.

She turned around and crossed her arms, eyeing him through her lashes while waiting for his explanation.

“Oh, no reason, Noelle. I mean, I just know that in three days Rome is the site for a premiere of one of those comic book movies. I believe, something about a guy with a hammer…”

“You can’t be serious.”

“Why not? I know Hamilton-Hodell was offering tickets to their clients to attend the premiere.”

She groaned, “Has nothing to do with our mutual friend who is in the movie, correct?”

“Is he in that? I totally forgot,” Benedict gasped with a hand over his mouth.

“Benedict,” Noelle snapped his name, filled with frustration and annoyance.

“Please tell me one good reason why I should fly to Rome. Even if I did go to the premiere, I would just be in the way. Besides, I’m sure Tom is attending with his girlfriend.”

Standing from the chair, he walked over to her, “It would get you out of this awful weather we’ve been having, and give you a chance to catch your breath. You’ve been working with no break since we got on set for  _War Horse_. I was thinking a little vacation in your ancestral land would be good for you.

“Also, as far as I’ve heard, Susannah will not be in attendance. She’s working on a movie in the States.” The grin on his mouth did not cover his devilish and unconcealed matchmaking ideas.

His smile also did not stop her memory of the cabana. The warmth of the California sun all around them for that brief moment she was in Tom’s arms. The feeling of lightheadedness that she remembered from his embrace, the caress of his lips on hers. As quickly as it all started, it ended in an instant.

_Ah yes, Susannah, his old co-star. Not that I should have expected him to stay single, especially after what I did to him. However, when he said they began dating **after**  that night in Belsize Park? That’s been a nice torture device for the past few months._

_Another brilliant mistake I’ve made with this guy in the course of eight months. No reason to continue that streak._

Noelle snapped back to the conversation, “Benedict, when I saw Tom in L.A., it was quite clear: he is not interested in me.”  _Except that kiss…which I’m keeping to myself._

Shaking his head, he said, “I would never insinuate that for either of you, not at all. However, the two of you are friends, correct?”

“We’ve texted back and forth a few times. He sent me some shots from the Marvel makeup trailer. I told him about my days and nights suffering with Fassbender in the 007 soundstage.”

He started to unbutton his cuffs, “Friends do attend premieres for each other. It’s not unheard of, darling girl. I mean, look at us: you’re here with me, and we’re friends.”

“Are we friends? I thought you were just some guy that hangs around my flat when he wants someone for one of his bitching sessions.”

He stuck his tongue out at her and she responded in kind. He walked over to the small dressing area and began to take off his dress shirt.

“So? Who cares?” he sighed, “You could find yourself having another friend to hang out with some night. Or, heaven forbid, you get out of your flat every now and again and have a pint or chips with someone.”

Poking his head around the screen, he smiled, “It will get you out of rainy, gray London. It will be good for you!”

Breathing out a puff of air, she shook her head, “I’ll look into it, okay? If it’s not going to blow my bank account, then I’ll contemplate the possibility.”

With a wave of his hand, he intoned, “Embrace the possibility.”

She was about to scream at him for sounding like a self-help novel when the door opened. A buxom woman with bright eyes and big teeth poked her upper body inside.

“Hey Benedict, I was curious if you were going out tonight?”

He smiled, crinkling his nose, “Yes, my dear, I will be partaking in the revelry over at the pub. I expect you’ll be there?” She responded with a loud cascade of high pitched giggles. Noelle was able to hold back the sounds of disgust in her throat but not the roll of her eyes.

“Great,” she said with a run of her tongue against her lips, “See you, soon.”

When the door closed, he threw out his arms, “What? She’s part of the production, it would be rude of me not to join the cast in their post-show celebrations.”

“Something tells me you’ve celebrated with her before, Benedict.”

“I am shocked and appalled at your insinuation, Noelle,” he stated, moving behind the curtain. When he returned, he smoothed out his t-shirt and placed his hands on his hips.

“That being said, she is quite delightful when she’s had a few and entirely enthusiastic in the bedroom.”

Noelle shrieked as her fingers dug into her scalp, “I don’t want to know, for the love of God!”

“Well, God is quite aware of the situation. His name was mentioned several times the other night by that lovely girl.”

* * *

_Why in the world am I on this red carpet? Oh wait, now I remember: Tom Hiddleston, that’s why._

Noelle took a few deep breaths before heading down the line framed by fans and photographers. Sprinting the area behind the actors and crew to enter the theater, Noelle hoped to go unnoticed. Her plan was simple: take her seat and maybe wave hello to Tom in the lobby afterwards. He knew she was attending, deciding at the last moment to text him and let him know of her plans. The last time she showed up unannounced to see him was a disaster, so she made sure there was some coordination between them.

The flashes went off a few times as she weaved in and out of the throngs of people for the massive event. The  _Parco Della Musica_ was filled with fans, screaming at each attendee. She watched her steps through a veil of brown curls in front of her face. The last thing she needed was for some newbie from TMZ recognizing her and taking her pictures.

 _Benedict was right, the weather here is amazing._ The air was light and fresh, the climate perfect for women wearing gowns and dresses for their photography. The sun was beginning to set over the large churches that were in the distance, every building a piece of history—modern or ancient.

“Noelle! Hey, Noelle!”

The only reason she stopped at the voice was the recognition of the person. The lilting tone of Thomas, combined with his heavy feet that pounded behind her.

She turned to find him wearing an impeccably tailored black suit, racing down the line. He gasped, “You came!”

Noelle burst into giggles, “We seem to be surprised by that fact with each other, huh?” Tom’s body shook as he let out a roaring laugh. Noelle waited for a moment, unsure of what to do or what was appropriate, now that they were friends.

Tom made the decision, bending down and grabbing her into an embrace, “It’s good to see you! I am so happy you’re here tonight!” Noelle remembered this excitement, the unbridled enthusiasm for life in Tom’s eyes. She had not seen it in so long, she almost forgot about it. His shining eyes and massive grin brought the old Tom right back to her.

“It just worked out, a break from  _Prometheus_ , Hodell having the tickets. It must have been fate, and quite honestly, I was desperate for a change of scenery.” Tom nodded along, hands on his hips.

“I know what you mean, I’ve been in Los Angeles pretty much since you saw me in March. It’s exhausting, non-stop training and preparing, but what an amazing experience. Filming will begin in New Mexico next month and continue into the summer.”

She felt herself smiling like an idiot, elevated by his emotion, the pure joy that ran across his features. Even when he was not speaking, he was grinning. It was difficult not to reflect some of that energy.

“I’m really happy for you! This is so great—“ Noelle was cut off, however, by a tall woman with red hair. Took a second, but Noelle recognized the actress as Renee Russo.

“Tom, I’m sorry to pull you away, but they want one more shot of all the actors before the movie begins.” She acknowledged Noelle with a gorgeous smile and a knowing nod.

Tom acquiesced, “I’ll be there in two seconds. Thanks, Renee.” Turning to Noelle, his eyes roamed up and down her body, the familiar feeling of ease relaxing the two of them.

_It’s too easy, falling into things like this._

He bit his lip before the words came tumbling out of his mouth.

“Do you have plans for tomorrow? I mean, will you stay in Rome for a day or two, or are you leaving right away?”

For a second, Noelle was so stunned, she blanked on the answer. Tom’s face began to fall in her silence and she snapped up to attention.

“I’m here for one more day, I figured I’d give myself the chance to explore Rome again. I haven’t been here in ages.”

The smile returned, larger than ever, “I’m leaving tomorrow night, late, to get back to Los Angeles. How about we go sightseeing together? It’ll be fun, we’ll see as much as we can in a day?”

She inhaled to allow the excitement and happiness more room to roam in her chest, “That would be great, um, text me tomorrow. We can decide on a time, I’m staying right by the  _Via dei Pettinari_.”

“Great! I’ll text you bright and early! See you then!” He broke out into a sprint towards the rest of the cast who were standing in front of a massive line of photographers. As he reached them, the flashes began, popping like fireworks against the backdrop. With trembling fingers, Noelle pulled out a compact and dusted off her nose, noting the blush that was forming across the apples of her cheeks.

* * *

She sat on the edge of the bridge on  _Ponte Sisto_ , looking out onto the city center. She grasped the scorching hot cappuccino in her hands, grateful for the large sunglasses that covered her eyes.

_I forgot how he is a morning person. Waking me up at the crack of dawn, after his run, to get me going. This was how he was on War Horse as well, always smiling. He’s like a walking ray of sunshine._

She looked up to find said gentleman, his long legs striding towards her. He wore a blue button down shirt, rolled up to the elbows with long gray pants.  She realized it must be impossible for someone to get cold if they never stopped moving. She pulled her light cardigan against her chest, the morning air still shedding the chill from earlier.

“Hey!” he sang, coming right up to her and pulling Noelle into a hug. She balanced her coffee while returning the embrace, nerves rushing forward in an instant.

“Come on, we have lots to see while we’re here since you’ve got me up bright and early,” she grumbled. He laughed, the one that made him bend at the waist and stick out his tongue through his teeth. She shook her head at him and they began their tour.

First stop was the  _Campo di Fiori,_ a beautiful square full of restaurants and vendors in an open air market. Noelle guided Tom over to one of the artichoke stands, picking out a round, ripe one for him.

He twisted the prickly produce in his hand, “How in the world am I supposed to eat this?”

She laughed, “Well, you pull the leaves off and you can fry them—its delicious. Then you take the interior and it is delightful as a dip, or roasted on crostini.” His face dropped and she laughed with a loud sigh.

“Just take it home, I’ll text you directions, okay?”

“Fine, fine,” he said, laughing, “I’m willing to try something once, but my kitchen skills aren’t the best.”

“Well, mine are a far cry from being considered ‘good’, but there’s a few things that I do know how to cook. All courtesy of my family’s extensive experience.”

As the continued on, Tom asked, “Your family is from Italy, correct?”

They had entered the square onto the  _Piazza Navona_ , soon surrounded by Baroque buildings and the dominant  _Chiesa di Sant’Agnese._  A smile ran across Noelle’s face as they walked into the center of the piazza to gaze at Bernini’s  _Fontana dei Quattro Fiumi._  Noelle recognized the Egyptian obelisk and pointed it out to Tom. For once, he had gone quiet from viewing the impressive sculptures all around him. She gave him the knowledge she knew of the massive sculpture.

The sun was beginning to shine through the skies, the clouds having taken a break. They weaved in and out of the groups of tourists in the area now that it was closing in on mid-morning.

They sat down outside one of the cafés, Tom enjoying his first and Noelle’s second cup of coffee that day. Watching the people walk through the churches to the fountain was a perfect break for them. Noelle returned to answer Tom’s question.

“Well, my mother is from Rome. She came to the United States when she was only three, being one of five in her family. They’re three boys, two girls. At the time, my grandparents were looking for better schools, more opportunities for my uncles. My mother and aunt were along for the ride.

“My father, however, is from Naples. Southern Italy—I look like him, dark hair, dark eyes. He left Italy when he was thirteen, and came with my uncle and his dad. So all the men left and my Nonna —grandmother—stayed here with my Zia Rosa.”

She narrowed her eyes, watching a family of four carrying their bags of groceries through the open area.

“Many Italians immigrated to Massachusetts, some going interior to Boston, some remaining in the outlying counties. My parents met in New Bedford, married and have their own home there for almost forty five years.”

Tom nodded along, impressed with that knowledge, “Wow, that’s a long history for them. And your sisters? You said your older sister was still where you grew up, correct?”

“Yes, Gabrielle is married with a son. They live no less than ten minutes from my parents. She’s an aide in one of the elementary schools, her husband is a successful Dentist. I think everyone in the area goes to him for their teeth. It’s quite interesting in that waiting room.

“Then, of course, there’s my younger sister, Isabelle. She’s studying and teaching molecular chemistry at MIT.”

“Holy shit, that’s no joke of a profession, huh?” Tom coughed, almost choking on his coffee.

“Yes, she’s probably going to be in school for the rest of her life.” When Tom met her eyes, she shook her hands in front of her chest to explain.

“Researching, teaching, taking more classes for a second and third Doctorate. She’s the one with all the awards and trophies on the mantle in the living room.”

“Gabby is the mom and the community pillar. She gets the love for being the supportive and caring family woman, being part of the PTA and library council. She is the mom that organizes the bake sales and has the big neighborhood dinners.” Noelle’s eyes focused on one of the churches, chiming for the top of the hour.

“Apparently, the lion’s share of intelligence was split between my sisters. I received the “also ran” sticker.”

Tom frowned at her face, as she turned to him and then at the cup in her fingers. She picked at the plastic cover with her fingernail, making an intermittent  _tick_. Tom ended the silence, his voice lower and steadier than before.

“Well, I can understand that whole middle child conundrum. Do not mistake me, for one moment. Both of my sisters are wonderful and intelligent women, and I’m so proud of them.

“I know my parents aren’t happy with my decision to go into acting. I mean, as of right now, the biggest thing I’ve been in was released today. Today, which marks seven years in this industry, working in television and independent films.

“While it’s been great, and I’ve worked non-stop over the last year, it’s been a hard road. I’ve watched my older sister be successful as a journalist, and get married. My younger sister is in acting as well, but isn’t in it long enough to determine if it’s worth her to continue. Right now, she’s successful.” He stretched out his legs, sniffing before continuing.

“However, I’m the only son—coming from a father who ran an entire pharmaceutical company. He makes great money, does well for himself. Here I am, scrimping and saving every penny and he looks at me like I’m insane.

“Double first, prestigious schools, and all for what? To become an actor. Trust me, they’re not thrilled. My mother will not openly say anything to me. She figured I would either make it or go bust and find something more lucrative.”

His voice dropped even lower, wistful even, “My father, however, is not thrilled and has told me on every occasion we’re together. Never going so far to call me a disappointment, but damn close. It’s not fun, being the one they don’t like to talk about at the family functions.”

Noelle released a hollow laugh,”Oh, I’m sure. I’m the one that’s ‘working overseas’ or ‘in the movie industry’ and promptly forgotten. That’s why I came across the pond, I needed that much separation from all of them to try and feel good about myself.” She trailed off, feeling she said too much and it was already making her uncomfortable.

She stood up from her chair, the feet scraping against the cobblestones, “Shall we? We should get ourselves going to the next stop.”

Tom hunched between his legs, looking into her unshielded eyes, “Noelle. I meant what I said to your idiot ex-boyfriend that night. You’re respected by a lot of people, and your name is getting around. I hear things. You shouldn’t feel a that you’re a failure, you’re much more than that.

“You remember the first day we met? That day in the sweltering heat, when I had to race all those horses down the hill? You helped me then—helped acknowledge the things that I feared, while showing me how to move past them. I don’t know if I would have been half as confident walking out onto that battlefield if it wasn’t for your voice in my ear.

“I know it’s hard, but don’t let those demons pull you down. Trust me—someone is gonna notice the amazing work you do, and it’ll make it to your family.”

Noelle nodded, feeling the tears raise in her eyes, not wanting him to see them. It had been a long time since she’d cried in front of Tom; she was not about to repeat the action now.

“Thank you,” she whispered, “We should still move on, though.”

Nodding, he let her lead the way as they moved through _Corso del Rinascimento_ , passing _Palazzo Madama_ , home of the Italian Senate. Tom appeared fascinated by the history, the lineage of every corner and brick in the buildings. At points, Noelle felt like she was handling a young child, having to grab him by the hand and guide him away from the new and interesting item in front of him.

A few minutes later they found her favorite place of all:  _Piazza di Trevi._ Both Noelle and Tom were speechless at the enormous Baroque fountain covered in sculptures of tritons and horses, complete with sparkling aqua-marine water. Digging in her purse, Noelle pulled out two coins and grabbed Tom’s hand.

He looked up, shocked at first, to the contact. She placed one of the coins in his hand and smiled.

“It’s tradition. Not only are you supposed to make a wish, but the coin is a promise. It’s to ensure your return to Rome someday.”

“Only if you promise me one thing,” he said, holding her hand tight against his, “that you’ll be my tour guide next time, as well.”

She could not meet his gaze, looking back at the fountain, feeling the warmth of his fingers in hers as she twisted the coin in her opposite hand.

She nodded, “Deal.” They both threw their coins in and Tom released her hand. Noelle realized it felt odd not having the contact, wrapping her arms around herself.

It was already past noon, and Noelle had one more place she wanted to take Tom. It would be a bit of a hike so the two pried themselves from the fountain and began the walk over to the  _Piazza di Spagna._

As they walked, Noelle felt the words fly out of her mouth, “So, I heard Susannah is in the States. Will she be joining you when you head back to Los Angeles?”

_Smooth, Noelle._

Tom looked away and nodded, “I believe so, she’ll join me at some point, either in New Mexico or in Cleveland. I’m supposed to end up back in London in October at some point. This movie, Avengers, it’s taken over my life this year.”

She placed a hand on his forearm, “This is it though, Tom, this is the big time. No more indies unless you want them, you’re going to be able to get yourself into bigger, stronger films.”

He looked down at her hand with a smile, “It doesn’t seem real—all these movies coming out at once? It’s all too incredible.”

“2011 is your year!”

Without looking at her eyes, he stared towards her hair, the curl now loosening in the temperate weather, “Our year, Noelle.”

They found themselves at the base of the Spanish Steps, the entirety of the staircase fanning outwards to culminate at the gardens. Noelle turned to Tom, as she placed her purse around her shoulder and to the back.

“I think we need to make this interesting, Hiddleston. This is how it’s going down. First one to the top, buys lunch.”

He exploded with laughter, rolling up his sleeves even further. “Ha! You’re on, Garguilo!” The two turned and on the count of three, they took off from the base. They climbed almost simultaneously at first, maneuvering around the people around them.

As they hit the halfway point of the 135 stair climb, Noelle groaned as she began to lose steam. The incredible burn through her muscles as she slammed her feet onto each step grew every second in the race. Her lungs felt like they’d burst as they closed in on the top.

Noelle looked to her left to find Tom taking the stairs two at a time. With ten to go, he jumped ahead, making it to the zenith with a jump of both hands in the air.

“I—am—victorious!” he screamed, though loud breaths and gasps, as Noelle made it up the final few. She promptly collapsed onto the top stair, desperate for her lungs to stop screaming at her.

She was soon dwarfed by his body, leaning downward to her, “I—want a— _gasp_ —panini.” Noelle blew a raspberry at him, with the last ounces of breath in her body. He plopped down next to her, bringing her upright as they leaned against each other in a fit of raucous laughter.

“Okay, okay! Give me a second, I believe there’s…” but she was cut off the sound of her phone in her purse. She pulled it out and saw the name at the top: Lois.

“Oh, God,” Noelle murmured. She mouthed sorry to Tom as she took the call.

“Hello, this is Noelle Garguilo.”

“Noelle! It’s Lois Burnell, I hope you’re doing well!”

“I am Lois, thank you for asking. I hope the same for you.” Tom tilted his head, his chest still rising up and down. Noelle shrugged as Lois continued speaking.

“Yes, dear, absolutely! Part of that is the reason I’m calling you today. We just got word that we’re set for Stephen’s new film—finally. His bio-pic on Abraham Lincoln is ready. All these years and we’re good to go. Except, now we need you on board.”

“I’m sorry?”  _I must be mistaken, did she just ask me to be on the makeup team?_

“Noelle,” she stated, “Stephen is asking for you— personally—to be part of the makeup team. You will be my assistant for the entirety of filming.”

Noelle lost her breath again as everyone stopped moving and the clouds paused their dance in the sky.  _This is impossible._

“You mean that? I—well, of course—I have to contact my agent, I believe they’ll have to put a contract through and discuss terms…”

“Noelle, you really aren’t getting this, honey! I want you, and more importantly, Stephen wants you for this film. As long as you aren’t asking for a million dollars in salary, it’s settled. Pack your bags for Virginia—and bring light clothes. It will be a sweltering inferno there in mid-August!”

“Oh my God,” she exclaimed, “Yes, thank you! Thank you, Lois! I—I’ll see you then!” They hung up and Noelle couldn’t help the screams that flew from her mouth as her feet pumped up and down on the stairs.

“I’m hired for the new Spielberg project! Another historical movie—based on Lincoln! They want me as First Assistant and will be willing to pay me a higher salary this time!”

He threw his arms around her, both of them laughing, as he burst out, “That’s amazing! Congratulations!” Noelle felt jolts of happiness race through her body as they embraced.

He pulled away and she realized how close they were to each other. It would have been too easy to fall into it again, fall into his arms and his kiss. She could not let that happen.

Forcing herself, she removed her arms and looked away, over the spectacular sight of Rome from atop the steps.

“This has been quite a day,” she mused.

“It has,” he murmured in response. When Noelle looked over at him, he turned his head, gazing out over a good portion of the city—towards the Parthenon and beyond. Noelle realized that it was getting later, and Tom would need to head back to his hotel for his flight that evening.

They both stood up, Tom throwing his hands in his back pockets, “Noelle, I really can’t thank you enough for this. This will be a memory I will never forget. I got to wind in and out of the streets, seeing the cafés and little shops. The fountains are spectacular, and ending with this view of an amazing city. Also, I have this lovely artichoke to figure out when I get home.”

She laughed as he continued, “I doubt I would have gotten all of this in if not for you. Thank you, so much.”

He bent down and placed a kiss on her cheek, remaining there for a second longer than appropriate for friends. Noelle’s eyes closed for a moment, inhaling the scent of his cologne before he moved away.

“Next time we’re both in the same city— we’re on for lunch, correct?” he said as his blue eyes sparkled in the waning sun.

She nodded with a smile, “It’s a deal.”

 


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As the cast and crew of War Horse begins preparations for it’s international release in October of 2011, Noelle and Tom return to a relative calm in London. However, they find themselves in changed circumstances than one year ago, both on the arms of very different people.

 

_“Be it ever so humble…”_ Noelle murmured as she collapsed through the door of her flat, leaning against it upon closure.  The first thing she faced was the unbearable heat and dank air of the rooms, since it had been closed for almost five months.  She let her luggage tumble to the floor, side stepping them to the windows.  Yanking each one up as high as they could go, she stuck her head outside for fresh air before heading back to the heat.  

She let her head search to the kitchen cabinets, and her first thought-even with the warmth of her surroundings- was for a cup of tea to relax her back home. Unpacking, and food shopping could wait for the time being. Right now, all she wanted was to rest in her own space.  She had been living out of hotels for so long, she almost forgot what it was like to make a cup of tea herself from a kettle.  

As she searched for her mug, she heard her phone  _chime_  in her jacket.  She had a slight smile on her face, a tingle creeping through her veins as to the sender of said message.

_Please tell me you have graced your presence in the same city as me! —Tom_

She dipped her head down, grinning at the familiarity of their text messages.

_Crap. This means I owe you lunch, doesn’t it?  Still pestering me on that panini, huh, Hiddleston? — Noelle_

She was about to set down the phone, when she flicked her finger upwards. She scrolled through the long string of text messages they had sent to each other in the past few months.  There were photos scattered throughout, sent back and forth between the two.  She looked at the old texts and the grin reappeared on her face.

_Here is a text you’d never thought you’d see: I am standing at the base of an active volcano and bored out of my mind.  How are you, today?— Noelle_

_Well, I’m in Cincinnati, but it’s supposed to be Germany.  Who knew they were so interchangeable?—Tom_

_How do people live in one hundred degree heat every day? Moreover, how was I lucky enough to be filming outside of all days today? —Noelle_

_Because you’re there? And you have no luck with weather! —Tom_

She paused on a few of the photos, ones with Tom and his long and darkened hair for Avengers.  There were ones at a baseball game, and him and a few extras hanging around for a late night shoot.  He even sent her a shot of him and Chris Evans from Comic Con in New York City.  She was still kicking herself for missing that opportunity, being stuck in Virginia while shooting went overtime for  _Lincoln_.

However, she felt the twinge at the one with the dark haired beauty, sitting next to him at the US Open.  The woman who spent the last few months with him, and usually had a large smile on her face. His arm draped around hers, the stadium and courts in the background. She found herself drawn to his smile, the gleam in his eyes.

She jumped when the phone chimed once again:  _I won that lunch fair and square, Garguilo.  It’s time to bite the bullet and settle your bill.  HA! Name your terms! —Tom_

She thought for a moment, a memory of a small place not too far past Hempstead Heath. It was a quaint little café, serving lunch and sweets throughout the day.  She pictured them at a side table, over two fragrant cups of coffee.  His hand in hers, thumb grazing over the soft skin on her palm.

_No, we’re not like that._

She texted him the name of the place and a time:  _So, please meet me this Friday, and you can stop this constant harassment. I thought you were a successful movie star? —Noelle_

She chuckled to herself as the kettle whistled its purpose and she let the water seep in the leaves.  Since Thor, she heard Tom’s name mentioned everywhere. His work in The Deep Blue Sea had scores praising his name and amazing talent.  It was being featured in all the film festivals, most recently in Toronto. From what she heard, it garnered huge amounts of buzz from insiders.

Noelle knew it was all accurate, Tom’s ability being recognized by the  world and would be even more popular when he would be featured in  _Avengers_. She read the text as it popped on the screen. _Don’t kid yourself, you know you have been looking forward to this since I beat you up those stairs! —Tom_

She snorted while shaking her head, “Always such a cocky bastard,” she mumbled.

_You have no idea. I have been pining my days away, counting the hours to this momentous occasion.  See you on Friday, Hiddleston. —Noelle_

She praised herself on remembering to take out the leaves from her tea before it went cold.  With a deep sigh, she looked around her flat, thoughts of laundry and basic necessities foremost in her mind.

This time her thoughts were interrupted by her phone ringing. Thinking it was Tom, continuing to harass her on the lunch, she jumped headfirst into the conversation.

“Did you forget the name of the café already? You’re losing that sharp memory of yours in old age.”

_“No, but if you’d like to give it to me, I will ensure my presence to you in forty-eight hours.”_

Noelle knew the voice, which was most definitely not Thomas.  It was the voice she had heard for almost three months nonstop in her ear.  Even when he was on the phone, she could picture the shark-like grin that was plastered across his face.

“Michael,” she said, the frustration already lacing through her words and causing her to roll her eyes, “how are you? I apologize, I thought you were someone else.”

 _“I am well, thank you.  Heard Lincoln was a huge success for everyone. I must admit I have been missing your face. Can’t say I’m not disappointed, I was hoping you were asking me out on a date, ‘Elle.”_ His words were accompanied by his baritone laugh, the one she could picture running through his chest, with his sparkling eyes.

Upon hearing her sigh, he chuckled some more,  _“I do have a purpose to this phone call, although I thoroughly enjoy hearing your voice again.”_ Noelle tilted the phone from her ear, the energy running through her veins at his incessant compliments.

“What is that purpose, Michael?”

 _“I wanted to ask you, since I’ll be in London in a week for the BFI film festival, if you would like to accompany me to the afterparty.  Steve asked me to join him in supporting a few of his endeavors, and I thought it might be fun to have a friend on my arm. We had lots of fun together during filming, wouldn’t you agree, Noelle?”_   She could see his face, the bouncing in his feet as she pictured him walking back and forth with the phone to his ear.  Those arm muscles of his that flexed while holding said phone upright.

“Well, I mean, I don’t know Michael.  I hadn’t planned on attending anything—“

 _“Nonsense, ‘Elle,”_ he said, cutting her off,  _“You said yourself, you were looking forward to getting back home and having some fun.  After all, you’ve been cooped up on movie sets all these long months. A premiere and party would be quite the opportunity to break that routine.”_

She tapped her fingers against the counter, wanting to say yes.  What was stopping her?

_Why shouldn’t I go out and have fun? I mean, I am single. It’s not like there are any other prospects in my life, and he’s quite good looking. I’m allowed to go on a date, after all, right?_

A flash of the picture from The Open ran in her mind.  Thomas had found someone new, what was holding her back?

“You know what, Michael? Sure, that sounds like a great idea.”

 _“Excellent!”_  he sang, the rumble of his gravelly voice vibrating through the phone,  _“I’ll text you the details as they get closer.  I am looking forward to seeing you again, ‘Elle.”_

“Same,” she said, although the smile in her voice was not present on her lips. Noelle found herself feeling guilty, although there was no prominent reason as to why.  

* * *

Noelle entered into the café a few minutes early. She told herself that they were meeting a half hour prior to the actual time to ensure her promptness.  She wanted to be seated when he came in, have him greet her.  

While all these months of them texting and calling were a welcome addition into her life, that was the extent of the relationship.  Just small snippets that never managed to go further than light joking or teasing.  A quick, “How’s your day” to check in with each other.

That’s what friends did, right?

She never asked about Susannah, and he never gave her any information.  Only the picture, and her knowledge from friends who were around them, told her they were still dating.  Benedict had confirmed the knowledge when he saw Tom a few weeks earlier.  Although, Benedict could not hide his smile when he told Noelle that Tom was asking about her.  

The red haired waitress came over to the table and she decided on a cappuccino, not wanting to eat anything just yet.  She wondered if she should have waited for him when she heard the bell  _chime_  for an entrance.  As always, Tom’s head was almost as tall as the door’s opening.  He dipped his head, an instinctual motion from past experiences of smacking it, Noelle assumed.

Her chair made a slight scraping noise against the wood floor as she stood up to meet him. Without speaking, he enveloped her into his arms, a massive embrace that almost swept her off her feet. She felt her breath puff out from the pressure, the warmth of his body radiating through her and onto her skin.  Noelle let out a nervous giggle, her only response to such an open display of affection.

“You look amazing!” Tom gushed as he pulled away and helped Noelle into her chair.  “No, really, your face is still glowing from all that delightful southern exposure.”

She laughed, “I could say the same for you! Being back in London for only a few weeks hasn’t taken the sunshine from your face.”  He looked over at her, his eyes shining a deep blue off the black of his sweater.  

The waitress reached their table, and Tom ordered an espresso, eagerly looking over the menu.

“She owes me lunch, a panini to be exact,” he murmured to the girl, causing Noelle to look up in shock. Tom dropped his own menu to gaze at the waitress, who was now quite curious at the handsome man and his gregarious personality.

“She thought she could beat me in a race.  Me! Can you imagine?” He stuck out one leg, causing the girl to bend over in a fit of laughter. He flared a hand at his leg, shaking his head.

“Look at these legs. I can’t believe she even considered that she’d come close to winning.”

He tilted his head towards Noelle, “Big, fancy makeup director for the movies, she can afford a sandwich, don’t you agree?”  The waitress nodded to him, curls bouncing around her face, while Noelle dipped her head to the table.

“Oh, God, Tom! Cut it out, he’s exaggerating, I’m sorry.” The girl waved them off to get his coffee while they  made their selections.  

“Well! You’re in quite the mood today, Mister Hiddleston.  What is the occasion?”

"I’m seeing a good friend who is buying me lunch. Why wouldn’t I be in a good mood?  He dipped his head into the menu after seeing Noelle smile at his words. He missed it as she removed the look as quick as it arrived. She tried to ignore the slice that went across her chest at the word  _friend_.

“So,” she said putting down the menu and picking up the oversized mug in her hands, “the big news throughout the mags is all about  _The Deep Blue Sea_. They’re saying both you and Rachel were phenomenal.”

He laughed, the breathy one that barely escaped through his mouth and caused his chest to shake, “Thank you. Once again, I got lucky with an amazing script and a cast I could only dream about.  It’s just surreal.”

"You know, you can be proud of your achievements, Tom.  You’re a great actor, it’s been said numerous times; I heard it repeated throughout filming on  _War Horse_.

"I know that my understanding of acting is limited, but, from what I saw on the sidelines? You’re brilliant.  You have a gift, and it’s becoming clear to a great deal of people."

"Thank you," he breathed.  His eyes moved across the tiny table and rose to hers. Noelle was deafened to the sound around her. They stared at each other, only to be interrupted by the waitress for his coffee and to place their panini selections.

When they were alone again, he turned the conversation, “That was over a year ago, you know?  God, that was some production. Time is screaming away, feels like yesterday.”

"It did—it does."  She rested her knuckles against her mouth, staring toward the floors of the café. She focused on the crumbs, the scratches, anything to keep her eyes from meeting his.  She feared he’d see what was in them, the longing and regret painted across her face.

He cut into her thoughts, “Speaking of our epic period drama, do you plan on attending any of the red carpet events in December? I know it’s going to be in New York City late in the month, and the London premiere is scheduled right after New Years.”

She sat back in her chair, “I haven’t thought about it actually. I realized that the other day, for the first time, have nothing planned.  It’s kind of disconcerting in a way. I should be enjoying the time off, but I get anxious about having no steady income.”

"You must have something on the horizon though, Noelle. You just worked two Spielberg’s and a Ridley Scott movie, it has to be out there."

"I have some things that are rolling around." She paused to take a sip, enjoying the steam from the fragrant coffee before continuing.

"I have a connection that might be working with Steve McQueen on a film he’s shopping and that might open things up. Unfortunately, that project is still over six months away. In the meantime, I’m hoping to hear back on something for BBC in the next few weeks.”

His head perked up, “BBC? What’s the project?”

"Its not confirmed, you know they always have several films going at once. Maybe I can pick up some work here and there.  There’s always working with celebrities in the beginning of the year, so I’m sure I’ll land on my feet somewhere.  Brandon, my agent, should get back to me soon."

After taking another sip, he tapped the table with one of his long fingers, “You know, it’s funny that you mention BBC, because I’m going to be working with them in a couple months.”

“Really?” Noelle said, temporarily distracted by their food arriving.

“Do tell, you’ll be joining a long and storied list of amazing actors!”

“Even better,” he smiled while leaning to her, “I’ll be performing Shakespeare.”

She found her mouth dropping at his statement, “Oh wow, you must be on cloud nine!”

“You’re pretty close! The BBC wants to put on a cultural ‘Olympics’ so to speak while we’re hosting the games next year. They’re filming four movies, all to air throughout July of 2012.

"They chose Richard II, then Henry IV and Henry V—four films. I’ve been cast as Prince Hal."

She gasped, “Are they going to make you cut your hair? You know he had the…” With animated gestures she circled her fingers around her head. Tom exploded into laughter at her movements.

"I haven’t heard, but if it is, I will go along with it.  It’s Shakespeare for the BBC, how could I resist?"

"This is fabulous news! It’s filming here?"

"Yep," he said before taking a bite. His eyes closed, savoring the flavors of his food.  Almost embarrassed at his reaction, he waved her over to eat as well. They sat in a comfortable silence while eating, both enjoying the sandwiches.

He dabbed his chin before speaking again, “We’re in the countryside, using one of the castles as backdrop.  Sam Mendes will be directing. It’s all a bit surreal.” He paused, frowning before speaking once more.

"Do you think you’ll stay in London for now?" It was a question but she wondered if she heard a bit of hope in his words.

"I think, for the time being, Ill stay put.  I did well with handling the last three movies, I should be okay here for now, and Kate Young does have clients in London.  Who knows, maybe I’ll do makeup for the  _War Horse_ premieres.”

"You should be on that carpet, like anyone else, Noelle."

"It all sounds good, doesn’t it? Just never works out that way, though, Tom."

Tom nodded, before perking upright, “You should come to  _The Deep Blue Sea_ party.  I rang Benedict and invited him to come along too. I know the  _Tinker, Tailor_  premiere is a few days prior.”

Noelle wanted to decline, she needed to say no. The look on Tom’s face was all too precious to bear.  His eyes gleamed with excitement, wordlessly begging her to say yes.

"I guess I could make an exception for you," she murmured under her breath.

"Great! Then we’ll see each other there as well!"

She sighed, “Looking forward to it.”

* * *

“You look fabulous, Noelle. Ravishing, I declare, for this evening. We’re at a party at one of the most exclusive clubs in London.  What could you be so nervous about?”

Noelle turned and smiled at Michael, his long hair back to original brown coloring. His green eyes twinkled with appreciation at the sight in front of him. She brushed a lock off of his forehead, a nasty habit she had with everyone, and retracted her hands.  If Noelle could determine why every nerve in her body was firing at rapid pace, she would have loved to tell him.  

“It’s fine, fine—I’m fine.” Michael tilted his head downwards, catching her eyes that now flit over every person in the room.  He had the ability to be far enough to be appropriate, but she still felt as if his mouth was dangerously close to hers.

The grin spread across his mouth, “If this is ‘fine,’ I would hate to see you on a bad day.”

“You did, on many occasions.  You were the cause of several of them.” He reared back and laughed, his entire body shaking at her words.  She kept twisting the clutch purse in her hands and praying that someone she knew would come in soon.

“How about this?” he offered, accompanied by a soothing hand on her shoulder, “I will go and get us a drink to settle those nerves?” She shook her head in the affirmative, and with a wink he was off to find one of the bars. Just as she was about to dip into her purse and pull out the compact to check her makeup for the fortieth time, she felt a hand around her waist.

“Well, hello, darling girl!” Benedict sang. Noelle flung herself into him, prompting an ‘oof’ with a gasp as he righted himself from the impact.

“I haven’t had a greeting like that in ages! What’s the occasion? You look lovely, by the way, I hope that isn’t the issue.”

“No, no, I’m glad to see you. I can’t place it but I feel out of sorts tonight.” She played with the navy colored silk sheath dress, trying to brush out invisible wrinkles.

"I wish I never came.”  

He scanned her face, “We’re at a party for our friend who’s just done another bang-up job on a film.  Everyone is drinking and enjoying themselves, it’s such hard work.” He grinned at her, but she did not return the gesture.  

She began to speak, but stopped, biting hard on her bottom lip and running her teeth over the smooth pink skin.  However, she didn’t have to say a word, as her date returned.

“Here you are my dear, one champagne.”  Michael glided to Noelle’s right just as she turned darkened shades of red under his intense gaze. As both men noted the other, eyebrows rose in primitive competition.  Noelle decided to cut in before they started pounding their chests.

“Benedict, I’m not sure if you have ever met Michael Fassbender. He is in town promoting a script with Steve McQueen for his newest film.”

She turned to her side, “Michael, this is one of my best friends, Benedict Cumberbatch.  He’s in  _War Horse_ and  _Tinker, Tailor_ , and I’ve known him more years than I can count.”

Michael’s mouth dropped open as he grabbed Benedict’s hand and gave it a firm shake.

“It’s a pleasure to meet you! I’ve heard many great things about you—especially in this movie that’s just come out. I’ve read a few of Le Carré’s novels and I am a huge fan.”

Benedict straightened up a bit before responding, “Th-thanks. It’s nice to meet you as well. I didn’t know you’d be here tonight.” Noelle saw the flicker of his eyes to her before he looked back to Michael.

“I asked Noelle if she would join me this evening, I hate running through these things on my own and we had so much fun together in Iceland. Didn’t we, Noelle?” He threw an arm around her.

She scoffed with a disgusted grunt, “You had fun, Michael. I was the one standing in the parka, trying to keep myself from freezing to death, praying you all hit your lines.” Michael never missed a beat, turning to Benedict,

“You’ve known her for years, she has always been this rancid? It’s like an eternal fountain of sarcasm.”

Noelle was about to snap at him when Benedict jumped in, “The attitude has just gotten worse over the years with age.”

She smacked him in the chest, causing Benedict to hunch over with a yelp. When Michael laughed, she did the same to him. They both responded with boisterous roars, fueling Noelle to a breaking point.

“God! I don’t need this from both of you.”

She walked away from them, both screaming her name and pleading her return.  She shook it off and walked through the multiple rooms, sipping her champagne.  After wandering, listening to the music, and watching all the famous people having fun, she stopped.  She found herself in a lounge with oversized couches and chairs spread throughout the space.  

She inhaled, trying to catch her breath upon seeing them.  Tom was leaning back against one of the cushions, a raven haired woman, on his lap. Her legs bounced back and forth as the smile never left her lips. She knew that look, the feeling of being lost in someone’s eyes, returning the smile without speaking. The room growing silent as two people felt they were the only ones there.

Noelle felt the tightness in her chest, the gasp that floated out of her lips on seeing them.  It was one thing in a picture, completely another to see them in such an intimate embrace.  Eyes fixed on the other, Tom’s hand traced lines up and down her arm.  

 _I thought I could do this, I thought I could handle seeing them._ Her hands were shaking—the liquid rocking back and forth in the fragile glass. She put it down on a table before it spilled onto the floor.  

_I was wrong._

She backed away, embarrassed by how she was reacting to the scene. She tried retracing her steps to return to Michael and Benedict. She made up her mind. It was time to leave; she wanted to be home and away from all the memories in her head.

_I have no say over him, none. Our time has come and gone, I can’t do this to myself anymore._

Her head raised, halting her steps before she crashed into someone.  She immediately saw the mile high shoes, the inappropriately long slit up the thigh before reaching the dark brown eyes staring back at her.

 _Siobhan Di Campos._  The two women glared at each other, the former and current flames of one Edmund Champan.  Noelle could see people stopping around them, even with the music blaring, the voices picking up.

 _If she’s here…_ She had no time to complete her thought as she heard venomous yelling from the adjoining room.

 _“Motherfucker! Get off of me!”_   It was Edmund’s voice.  Noelle feared only one person would be foolish enough to escalate into an argument with him in a public place.

Both women turned and ran for the room. Noelle gasped, finding Benedict with his hands on Edmund’s jacket lapels and his face contorted in a murderous glare.  Ben’s teeth bared from his mouth, Michael attached at his arms, pleading him to back off.  

“Benedict, stop!” she screamed as she ran over to them.  The crowd had moved around them, framing the group as both men jerked back and forth from each other, neither relinquishing their hold.

Benedict let go with a thrust, snapping, “Fuck off, you piece of shit.”

Edmund snapped his jacket down, while Siobhan ran to his side.  She rubbed his arm, soothing in her shrill voice, “What happened, baby? What did he do?”  As she comforted him, Noelle caught the sparkle of the massive ring that adorned her left hand.

“This asshole made the mistake of putting his hands on me,” Edmund returning back to his usual self-composed air of confidence.

Michael kept one arm on Benedict, Noelle positioned herself at his opposite. She kept her eyes on Edmund the entire time. He was dangerous in any situation, but he was lethal when confronted.  She knew this the hard way.

“Talk about my dear friend with such slander, you’re damn right I’m going to come after you. You need to learn manners, Chapman.  I’ve said for years that you are a classless fraud.”

The scowl Noelle intimately remembered crept on Edmund’s mouth, “Well, those manners were fine and good for your new girlfriend over there while she was with me.” He tilted his head to Noelle, never glancing at her as he spoke.

“That’s all she is good for anyway, Cumberbatch.  The scraps that are left over after the Alpha dogs come through.”

Benedict growled, lunging towards Edmund once again. Michael held him back, along with Noelle.  Edmund held his ground, laughing the entire time.  Siobhan kept her head high, her arms now laced around Edmund’s side.

“Please continue, Edmund,” Benedict hissed, “I’m sure everyone here would love to know how much of a nightmare you are when the cameras stop rolling.”

He leaned forward to Benedict, Noelle and Michael both tightening their grip, “I only speak the truth, Benedict, and all these people know that. You’ve been at this for how many years, and you’re still tenth billed on these movies? You’ll never amount to anything.

“Which is why it’s nice to see that you’re adopted Noelle.  Another nobody who is perfect for you.’’ Just as Noelle was about to yank Benedict away, Edmund careened backwards.  His body slammed into a wall, the assailant lifting Edmund off his feet.  

“I told you before to never insult her again!” Noelle realized it was Tom, just as his hand reared back in a fist.

“Tom, no—stop it now!” she screamed, and ran up to him to stop his assault. She grabbed his arm and two stumbled, nearly falling over each other. Siobhan dissolved into high pitched shrieking, as she took Edmund towards the exits.  The room was silent, onlooker’s mouths gaping open from shock. Tom shrugged Noelle off of him and glared at the couple.

Edmund looked around, the crowds watching them with morbid curiosity, “Let’s get out of here, baby. This party has gone into the gutter.” The two escaped through one of the exits. The attention of those who remained turned to the remnants of the fracas.

Noelle stared at Tom, who was looking at his hands, as if they had the answers to what had happened in the previous minutes.  Noelle saw over his shoulder that Susannah entered the room. Her piercing stare focused on Tom, unflinching.  Noelle watched the woman’s hands open and close, chest rising and falling, never stopping.

Noelle was brought back to her own body by the sound of Michael talking to Benedict, “You okay, man? What an asshole, eh?” She heard murmurs of agreement from his mouth, becoming closer as they approached her.  Tom raised his head to the trio, but his eyes remained on Noelle.

Noelle shook her head at him, every emotion bursting just underneath the surface.  Anger won the battle.

“Another scene with that animal, and you just had to get involved,” she spat at him.

She turned, “Michael, I-I’m so sorry, I have to go home.” Michael and Benedict attempted to stop her, saying she should stay or they would call a cab. Noelle waved them off, not looking backwards to any of them: Michael, Benedict or Tom.  Tom, who was silent and emotionless, just staring at Noelle.

She raced onto the street and ran down the block, the coolness of the evening air causing her to gasp.  In her short dress, she immediately began to shiver.  Noelle kept up her pace, eventually hailing a cab and blurting out her address. She pressed her head against the glass, attempting to catch her breath before the tears threatened to fall.

 _He will always find me. Always remind me that I am worthless._   

She didn’t realize how hard she was holding back her tears, keeping herself from dissolving into the emotions that threatened to grab her downward, until the driver announced they had stopped. Throwing him the cash, she refused change and ran inside.  

As the door clanged shut to her flat, she promptly sunk to the floor.  Her head on her knees, navy dress pooled around her, she sobbed into the soft fabric.  She clung to her legs like a child, body shaking until it had all poured forth.

Noelle remained seated on the floor, losing track of the time.  When she finally unfurled her limbs, everything ached, along with her head.  She collected herself out from the heap, kicking her heels into the corner.  Her bed would be the final destination of the evening.

She jumped at the sound of banging at her door.  With a shuddering sigh, she assumed it was Benedict or Michael coming to check in on her.  Wearily, she opened the door as her eyes met those sky blues that haunted her dreams.

Tom stood in front of her, breathing heavily as if he just finished a run.

“You’re going to let me in and we’re going to have a talk right now, Noelle.  You’re not leaving this time.”


	13. Chapter 13

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Noelle is confronted at her flat by Tom in the aftermath of the BFI afterparty. However, she never expected to be working again with Tom on Hollow Crown—and looks to a friend for some comfort in the process.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I sincerely apologize for the long wait in between chapters, March was a horrible month. Thank you for sticking with Tom & Noelle and I promise their story will continue, with more frequent updates!

 

Noelle felt her shoulders drop at Tom’s heated words.

_You’re going to let me in and we’re going to have a talk right now, Noelle.  You’re not leaving this time._

The anger raged inside her body, causing her to shake. Her arm remained flush against the doorframe, blocking Tom’s entrance into her flat.

“Why? What exactly do we need to talk about Tom? What is so important to you that you needed to race to my flat and bang down my door?” She sniffed with a hard swallow.

Tom intoned, “You’ve been crying.”

She sighed with a flourish of her hand into the air, “Yes. There’s no reason to deny it, I was crying. In fact, no more than a few minutes ago, I was sitting on the floor right over here. I thought about this entire evening and wondered how one night could go so wrong on so many levels.

“However, there is no reason to concern yourself.  You and your good friend have done a smashing job at another enthralling moment with my ex-boyfriend. Let’s see how low my name can go as it’s smeared through the papers tomorrow.”

Tom’s jaw firmed as Noelle watched his teeth grind against each other.

“I was trying to help you.”

“By throwing Edmund against a wall? Clever tactic, but I hate to break it to you: not effective. I’m not sure which of you was worse; Benedict going after him by cursing his head off, or you, deciding to assault him.

“I hope you aren’t here expecting me to thank you for that.”

Tom’s mouth dropped open, “How can you be so blind, Noelle? I can’t imagine that you’d be this angry towards friends who just want to defend you.”

Hearing the word friend felt like a smack across her face.  Noelle’s hand threw the door open so it hit the opposite wall with a  _slam_ , “Maybe that is because I am, Tom. Maybe it’s clear to me that I will always be reminded of the person I was in the past.  I can advance in my career, but when situations, like tonight happen, it mars every step forward.  Because all people in the industry see are these moments of drama and it is back to ‘Noelle—the makeup girl.’

Her hands slammed into each other on her words, “Every, single, time! When faced with some type of adversity, I’ve relied on someone else to get me through. When I try to break that and move into my own path, people like you come rushing forth to save the day.”

“You do this to everyone that helps you, Noelle? What about Benedict?” He leaned towards her, towering over her small frame. She could see the rage in his eyes, the ones she remembered from watching him during  _Thor_.  He was containing his emotions, but it would not be for long.

She shook her head, as more damp tendrils cascaded from her messy bun, “Trust me, I am pissed at him. He knows that I will call him tomorrow and tell him he was out of line.

“However, Benedict and I have known each other for over a decade.  A decade, Tom. He was there when Edmund unceremoniously dumped me from our home of three years onto the street.  He knew what I went through in the press and he brought me from a dark and evil place that I found in the months afterward.

“While, yes, I am upset that he got into it with Edmund, I am more than confident that Benedict had been pushed to a point that he felt he had to act.  I know my ex well enough to know: he provoked that reaction from Benedict.

Tom rolled his eyes, slamming his palm into the wall outside her flat, “You always excuse his behavior.”

“He’s my friend! I expect this kind of crap from him. Edmund is well aware of the fact that Ben has a horrendous temper; you know this too! It takes but a minuscule spark to ignite it.

“However, Tom, let’s put the cards on the table. How would I know that about you?”

He closed his eyes at her words and Noelle’s chest tightened again.  She inwardly groaned at another argument, another dance around this thing: friendship, relationship. She rushed forward in her words, careening through every barrier that her rational mind used in its attempts to stop her.

“Tom, what are we doing? You have your girlfriend, you have your amazing career that is about to explode into the stratosphere. What do you believe has such importance that you have to barge into my home tonight?”

His blue eyes leveled to hers, searching her face.  His mouth opened, and Noelle knew, instinctually what he would tell her.  

However, her heart had a different opinion. She wanted Tom to say it was for her. Deep across every inch of her skin, in the depths of her heart and in her mind, she wanted him to profess that he’d wanted her all this time.  For the moments between every encounter, he longed for her.  He wanted her in his arms, he wanted her laugh, her sighs in his ears once again.

Noelle wanted to hear the words she herself wanted to desperately scream, but refused to cross her lips.

Tom kicked his shoes against the hollow wall, mumbling, “I wanted to make sure you were okay, Noelle.” His face turned into the darkness of her corridor.

The smile, her comfortable mask raised, once more, “Well, now you know. Time for everyone to call this a night.”

“Goodnight, Noelle,” he spoke over his shoulder, turning on his heel and disappearing down the hallway.

Without another word, Noelle closed the door and hung her head against it.  Her eyes closed as she shook her head back and forth.  Now that she was alone, the mask dropped like a weighted anchor.  She wished, in some ways, that she could become that anchor and sink right along into the sea. Falling into the open depths where she could feel weightless. She longed for a place where she could be free of the emotions that she feared would drown her, in time.

* * *

Noelle groaned as she heard her mobile ringing from her nightstand.  Her head chimed along with each tone, still aching from the prolonged crying of the prior evening.  Rolling her neck along her shoulders, she reached over to determine who would dare call so early in the morning.

That is, if one considered half past ten to be ‘early’.

With a groan at her wasted morning, she focused on the screen. The ID flashed her agent’s name.  Trying to clear her throat so it did not sound as if she had been sleeping all this time, she attempted some cheer in her voice.

“Jonathan, how are you today?”  She sat in an upright fetal position, one hand grasping against her calves.  She prayed that this was not a call regarding some fallout of her latest public debacle.

“Morning, Noelle! Well, I have some fantastic news!” With a puff of air, Noelle breathed a sigh of relief before he continued on with his grand notification.

“I hope you’re good to pack up again, because you have been offered the job of a lifetime! The best part: you won’t have to travel far! Furthest is to the temperate and seafaring Wales for your newest adventure.”

_Oh, God, please get to the point._

“It’s the BBC position, Noelle.  You’re going to be heading up a Shakespearian production.”

She flailed out her legs, nearly kicking the sheets off the bed. With a hard swallow, the words tumbled from her mouth.

“The BBC? A new Shakespeare film?”

“Yes!” he screamed, prompting her to move the phone as far away as possible from her ear.  With a groan she listened as he continued to prattle on.

“Seems the BBC will be putting on a bit of a ‘cultural Olympics’ in time with the games next summer.  Have you heard about this?”

 _All too well_ , she silently mused.  

“Yes, of course, it’s all over the place.  This is the  _Hollow Crown_ series? Irons, Beale, and,” she paused, “other British actors?” She could not say it, the mere thought of his name turning her skin cold and stomach nauseous all over again.

“Yes, this is going to be a major undertaking! Well, they begin filming in the beginning of December and it’s rolling straight through February. Many of the locations are close, so no major time differences.

“The whole series will be four two-hour productions aired back to back.” He paused, a tactic Noelle knew was his way of dropping a bomb. She was about to snap at him when he returned to the main purpose of his call.

“Noelle, they want you as Makeup Director.”

Her hand flew to her mouth before she spoke with cautious words, “Wait, Director for one of the movies or the entire series?”

She could see him, in his executive chair with his brown penny loafers bouncing off the carpeting.  Noelle knew he was excitable but this was a huge coup for both of them.

“Noelle, you’ll be in charge of the entire production! They want you at the studios in the next few days to discuss planning, and who you will want for your team.  In essence you are coordinating four different, but connected, films.  You’ll need to begin your research and planning immediately.”

Her head was swimming as she collapsed into the cushions behind her, “Yes, of course. Well, it’s a good thing I am available, huh?”

He burst out into raucous laughter. Noelle could already predicted a bottle of some type of whiskey as it emerged from his desk all while he was dancing from the news.  She knew this was huge; her ascendance to the role of Director for her first major production.  Combined with the fact this position was for the BBC, in conjunction with the Olympics and the kicker being a tetralogy of Shakespearian histories.  This was not just the signing of a contract; this was her step onto a new platform within the industry.

Yet, the anxiety began to fester into her stomach, taking away some of the excitement that should have been present.  Jonathan broke through her thoughts and grounded her from spiraling out of control.

“So, I’m going to make that appointment for you to meet the rest of the directors at BBC studios.  I’ll text you the date and time, you make yourself available.  Nothing is to keep you from that meeting, got it, Noelle? Speaking of, I will be calling you that morning, as well as my assistant.”

Rolling her eyes, she huffed, “Got it, Jonathan. You know, I was only late two or three times on  _War Horse_.”

“Two or three times that will never happen again, right Noelle?”

She growled and he laughed in response, “Go out and celebrate! You were worried about not having steady work, I’d say it’s time to thank your fairy godmother! Do something nice for yourself. Go and spend some of those hard earned Spielberg monies.

“Or, perhaps it is time to look for a new apartment?”

She looked around her cozy flat, the warm light streaming in through the tall windows facing towards eastern London. While it was small, and at times cramped, it was hers. It was comfortable and reasonable, and those were two things that Noelle regarded most dear in her world.

“No, Jonathan, I’m happy where I am right now. However, I could always use some new shoes.”

* * *

She stood in font of the mirror, admiring the cherry red stilettos with the four and a half inch heel.  They were ridiculous, expensive and something she did not need or require.  But much as those thoughts chimed in her head, the right side of her brain took over.

_Ah, but you need them, don’t you?_

With a flourish of her hand and a tilt of a heel, she asked, “What do you think?”

Michael rested one of his hands against his mouth, as he remained silent. When Noelle looked over her shoulder to him, his eyes drifted from their first (and higher) position on her body, down to her shoes. Rolling her eyes, she faced him and he sat upright on the oversized ottoman.

He stuttered, “Th-they’re nice?  They have red soles, so that’s different?” His mouth dropped open and he held his hands out with the palms up in front of his chest.

“Um, I have to admit, Noelle, I’m not good with shoes. It still amazes me how women can maneuver in those high, thin heels.”

As she looked at herself in the mirror once more, she mused, “We do it carefully.” Her long brown curls hit the middle of her back and she was quite happy with the lighting of Selfridge’s showroom floor.  

“I like them,” she smiled and the decision was made. She heard the relieved sigh float from Michael’s lips and she waved a saleswoman over to complete her purchase.

“I don’t understand,” she said, the snark already rising in her words, “I thought you wanted to spend time with me while you were in London? Here we are, together. I thought that you would be chomping at the bit for this?

“I didn’t expect shoe shopping to be a preferred activity,” he grumbled, now placing his hat back to his head and adjusting it to cover his eyes.  

“I much rather enjoy the ones that involve consumption of alcohol.”

As Noelle signed the receipt, she huffed, “Oh, quit complaining. We’ll hit that restaurant across the way and you can have your liquid lunch.”

Offering her coat, Michael guided Noelle from the department store into the burgeoning drizzle of London in late afternoon. The winds of earlier died down and now a gentle breeze blew through their hair as they crossed the street to their next destination. Michael offered his umbrella as they moved closer together.

“So, this was nice,” Michael said, prompting a sideways glance from Noelle at him.  

“No, I mean it. After everything that happened last night, I worried you’d disappear and I wouldn’t hear from you for the rest of my stay here in London.”

She stopped on the sidewalk, allowing the long-handled bag in her hand to swish back and forth against her side.

“Well, I figured it was news to celebrate, and what better way than with shoes? Plus, I wanted to see you one last time before you left and I’m pulled away for this new project for the foreseeable future.”

“I’m glad you thought of me.  I would expect you’d be with one of your other boys today.”

With a sharp inhale, Noelle started walking again, Michael’s feet racing to keep up with her.  She shook her head just as they entered the restaurant.

“I don’t have ‘boys’. I have a friend, Ben. I have a former colleague, Tom.”

“Hear you, loud and clear,” he murmured as they were led to an intimate booth in the back.  For a split second, Noelle hesitated before they proceeded.

The area had the cozy privacy that was perfect for a couple.  A couple looking for escape from peering eyes. She froze at the jolt in her skin as Michael’s hand rested on her back. With slight pressure, he led her in before seating himself.

“Seems like an altogether decent place for some tea and food, would you say?” he asked, clearing his throat.

“Tea, Michael?” The smile, the large one that displayed every single one of his perfect teeth, grew across his face.

He chuckled, “Well, for you, Noelle. For me, something stronger is required.” The waitress came to the table. One Guinness and one Earl Grey were ordered while Noelle looked over the menu.  It took only her scanning through the salads before she realized her companion’s eyes were not on his menu, but rather, on her.

She met his gaze, expecting him to avert and focus on his drink.  However, he maintained the contact, even sliding his hand under the table to hers.  For a second, she flinched, but she allowed her fingers to relax.  The warmth of his skin immediately permeated hers, a feeling she missed for what seemed like ages. The contact that had an intimacy, a touch, that was more than just familiarity.

The hairs on the back of her neck straightened as he leaned toward her ear.  She anticipated the heat of his breath, but was surprised by the scent of mint that wafted past her nose.  She turned to him, both of their mouths dangerously close to each other.  The combination of the smile on his face and twinkle in his eye confirmed Noelle’s belief that he was readying for a retort, another snide comment to her.

Noelle decided that it would be easier to silence him. Without thinking, she did just that by pressing her lips to his mouth, opening just enough to make this kiss more than friendly.  He responded in kind as his hand closed around hers underneath the table. She wanted to deepen the kiss, move her arms around his neck.  Something kept her frozen in the process.

When Michael pulled away, he wiped his bottom lip with his thumb before he spoke.  It was then Noelle realized he was trying to keep laughter from permeating his words.

“Noelle?”

“Yes, Michael?”

“What are we doing? Because it’s obvious to me, that this isn’t what you want.”

She pulled her hand away from him as her hands ran through her hair and back over her face. Her forehead dropped onto the hard wood of the table underneath them and groaned.  Michael began to snicker under his breath, causing Noelle to grumble towards him.

“I’m glad you find this funny. I kiss you and you respond saying I’m not what you want.”

“Oh, no, you misunderstood me, Noelle.”  She turned her head to view him, reclined in the leather of the booth.

“I never said it wasn’t what I wanted.  It’s obvious that you have no real desire for me. Sorry, I’ve been in this position before and I know the signs. I wish it wasn’t true, but honestly, I respect you enough to call a spade a spade when it’s all I have in my hand.”

She grabbed her mug, allowing herself to inhale the floral aroma before taking a sip, “Lovely, I know just how to put myself into it, every single time.”

“Noelle, I think I can assure you, nothing’s ruined here. You’re looking for something you thought I might be able to give you. Now, while I know you hate when I pontificate at length, but, may I give my own deductions to your situation?”

Trying to put aside her embarrassment, she nodded while holding the heated mug against her chest like a shield.  

“Now, remembering our conversations from working together, in conjunction with the events of last night gave me a couple of clues as to what is at play.

“You’re still trying to piece together exactly what your relationship is with Tom, correct?” With a deep sigh, she murmured her assent. He picked up his pint, inhaling a sip of the froth before continuing.

“Last night didn’t make things any easier for you did it? In your mind, that was done and over, right?  You were trying to move on from him.  Then Galahad comes running in, with his sword and shield, and you’re trying to figure what’s the purpose.”

Noelle let out a long frustrated growl, earning a surprised stare from Michael.  The words began to pour out of her, as if he hit the tap and now there was nothing to hold her back.

“The worst part is, he comes to my flat, banging down my door! What am I supposed to make of that, Michael? Once again, he acts like he’s trying to save my honor, all while his girlfriend watches? It’s as if he doesn’t know what the hell he wants and I’m sick of it.”

“Maybe he does, Noelle. Did you ever tell him how you felt? I mean, you did tell me you had a pretty heated affair while on  _War Horse_.”

“No. I mena, I apologized for my actions and wanted to move forward. It’s just every time I see him, I am brought back to believing that I could have had something wonderful with him. I hadn’t felt that way in ages, with anyone.  That is taking the short time we had together into consideration as well.

“I have to let this all go, Michael. I have to, for my own sanity.  I’m going to be working with him on  _Hollow Crown_  and this is nothing like  _War Horse_.  This is every day for months!” She felt the tears perk at the corners of her eyes as she rested her head against one of her hands.

His hand caressed her shoulder, squeezing it with gentle pressure to remind her he was there, “Noelle, while I can’t tell you what to do, I am going to tell you something from my perspective.

“I think you both know what you want, but are afraid to say it.  Now, right now, you two will need to focus on a professional relationship. However, in the end, it may have to be an all or nothing situation.  Friendship is probably not going to work for the two of you like it did with you and Benedict.  

“So, maybe you’re right, and you need to make a break—mentally and emotionally with this guy.  Although, from what I saw after you left, he’s in some relationship woes of his own.” He took another sip while his eyebrows raised at his insinuation.

She took the bait, “What do you mean?”

“Well, his girlfriend—the short, raven haired girl? She was not happy with him at all.  They were barely speaking before I saw her leave without him”

_Which means he made the trip to my flat under those circumstances?_

She remained silent.  All that remained were the sounds of glasses clinking around them, the music from speakers almost drowned by the game being played on the television over the bar.  Michael tapped his finger against his glass before sitting upright as he leaned towards Noelle.

“My advice, and yeah, you’re allowed to take it or leave it. Keep things professional, feel out the ground between the two of you. Movie sets can be good for that.  Maybe, by the time you make it onto that field in Wells you can find yourself in a better position. You’ll both have had time to determine what you both want. I’ll be honest and say his actions belie something more than friendship, but that’s just me.”

Even in the dimmed lighting of the booth, she could see the glint in his eyes.  The sparkle that lit up from within and accompanied the lines forming against his eyes.  With a long pull, he finished his lager and signaled to the waitress for another.  Noelle began to speak, more to herself but also as a confirmation of his thoughts.

“I think you’re right. We’ll have to be professional for this.  _Hollow Crown_  is the biggest step I’ve made in my career. Makeup Director for an entire series and I have to get myself prepared.  I can’t have anything distracting me.

“Good! Glad to hear it. Now, I’ll take today’s dinner as compensation for this consultation.”

“Consultation?”

“Yes, well, if this isn’t a date then my advice doesn’t come for free.  Jesus, you’d think I could get away with that on my charm and good looks alone.” She groaned in disgust before he cackled and received another  _smack_  square in his arm.

* * *

Noelle tried to calm her shaking hands as she pulled out the portfolio and notebooks she bought to the BBC studios. The producers at the BBC were eager to begin the preliminary work necessary for filming to commence.  A video monitor was set up to view some of the sets and locations that were being considered for filming. Noelle watched the IT staff flit around, placing tablets for each member of the staff at their seats.

As more executives filed into the room, she smoothed out her jacket and skirt, hoping that wearing the bright red heels underneath her black suit was not too outlandish for this meeting.  She knew from experience that sometimes the directors came to these sessions in sweats, so she hoped to keep things professional but light.

As one of the P.A’s walked through she handed Noelle a large binder with the agenda for the day.  She scanned it and nearly fell into her chair.

_9:00am: Discussion with directors and principal actors, lighting and prep work._

“Excuse me?” she asked the assistant, “Do you know which actors will be available for today?”

“No ma’am, but its for everyone on board to hear what Mr. Mendes has prepared for filming in a few weeks.  They want the actors available for any costume fitting or makeup tests.” She rushed off to the outer offices, and Noelle realized she was desperate for water.  Her hand nearly knocked over the glass on the tray, her shaking intensified over the past few minutes.

She gasped as another hand shot out and righted the glass before her. Another poured water into it from the crystal decanter.  As her eyes travelled up the arm draped in a dark blue suit, she met the dark blue eyes that refused to shine in her presence.

Tom held out the glass to her, with a tilt of his head, “How are you, Noelle?”

_So much for having enough time to calm things down between us…._


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Face to face shortly after their argument, Noelle must manage working together with Tom on the set of The Hollow Crown. She is soon faced with the question: should she finally admit to her feelings for him, or continue the charade?

 

 

  


 

Noelle looked into Tom's eyes. It was the failsafe indicator of his true emotions.  While his voice was lilting and genial, his eyes remained steadfast and cold.  Only a few days had passed since he was at her flat in the middle of the night. Yet, here they were, once again in a frigid silence.

“I had a feeling you’d be here today. Luke told me you got the job as Makeup Director. Congratulations.” The smile was a mask to the lack of sincerity in his words.  In fact, they felt like a knife in her chest, their relationship and friendship gone.

Keeping her professional side, she nodded, “Thank you, Tom. I’m looking forward to working with you on this.” Her eyes softened, trying to grasp some warmth in his words. He refused to respond in kind.

“Likewise,” he quipped before turning toward the opposite end of the large oval table.  More actors and crew filled up the space and Noelle slumped into her seat, trying to regain her composure. With shaking hands, Noelle sipped from the glass, keeping her eyes away from his vicinity.

_How in God’s name am I to work with this man over the next three months?_

A few more assistants came into the room, followed by their producer.  Sam clapped his hands and regarded the large group in front of him.

"Everyone, welcome! I am so glad to be here with all of you on this amazing production. The BBC is making this their "crown jewel" of programming for next year. Please believe me when I say that we have a fantastic cast and crew for these films.

"Now, I must warn you--we're filming in the burgeoning crisp of winter out the beautiful English countryside. Time to invest in some thermals, people." The room broke into muted laughter and Sam sighed.

"Ah, the things we will do for Shakespeare! If you will review from the packets in front of you, first on our agenda is to have everyone fitted and set for costumes and makeup.  Best to complete those tasks before lunch so waistlines do not expand too much." Sam nodded over to Noelle along with Annie Simmons, the head costume designer. Noelle grabbed her messenger bag, and pulled out her binder of notes for each character.

With Annie discussing costumes, Noelle gave her input on  hair and makeup. There were actors that would flow between the films, and some would age dramatically over the timeframes.  Many characters underwent changes in status over the four films, requiring intricate wardrobes, and the appearance of nobility in their role.  Also, some would need facial hair or coloring throughout filming and that would impact the production schedule.  

When Jeremy Irons entered the room, Noelle felt a little surge of excitement.  He was one of her favorite actors, having seen him several times on stage in various dramas since she was a teen in England.  She usually did not get nervous around actors, but having such an impressive individual in her sights gave her pause.

"I may have played Scar on film, but I promise I do not bite, my dear," he said in his melodic voice, his dark eyes turning towards Noelle.  She chuckled a bit before heading over to him, shaking her head in the process.

"I apologize, I lost a bit of my professionalism for that second. You come with quite the list of amazing performances attached your name."

"Oh, but I hope my reputation is not as lengthy or daunting." he replied with a large smile.  The light bounced off his eyes, relaxing her in an instant.  Noelle realized that they would indeed work well together.

She discussed with Annie as to how they would reverse and then age Jeremy over the films.  He sat with an amused smile that played against his lips while he watched the two women discuss appropriate colors.  Annie demonstrated a few samples as both women looked at how they would work with the backdrop of each set and the themes for the plays.

With raised eyebrows, he jested, "You know, I think I will be having a great deal of fun alongside the two of you during those cold mornings on the English moors." The two women giggled as a throat cleared in the rear of the room.

Jeremy looked to the far wall, "Thomas! Ah, it's good to see you again, my son!" With a wink, Tom shook his hand.  Both women waited for Jeremy to leave before they began on Tom's specifications.  However, only one of them felt an impending sense of dread with the task.

As Jeremy exited the room, not without another gracious thank you to the ladies, Thomas sat in his chair and focused on the far wall.  He maintained little to no contact with Noelle.  She attempted to ask him questions regarding his ideas in costuming.  However, he spoke only to Annie.

Anxiety turned into anger and Noelle snapped, a hint of venom in her words.

"I think we should give him the traditional Prince Hal cut. Just drop a bowl on his head and run the scissors in a circle." She punctuated it with a swirl of her hands. Annie turned with a shocked glance while Tom's eyes narrowed to slits as he brought his gaze to Noelle.

"No?" she said, her voice raising a few octaves as she swiveled back and forth, "I think it might be an improvement."  Annie decided that she needed a swatch that she left in the other room. More likely, she picked up on the heightened hostility in the room at present.  

As the door closed, Tom huffed through his nose, "Do what you want, Noelle. I've told you before I don't care what I have to do for this role."

She leaned into him, "I don't care either, but you're not going to intimidate me today."

"Intimidate!" he scoffed, "I'm doing no such thing!"

"You know damn well what you're doing, Tom. If I was anyone else, you'd be--at a minimum--cordial and conversational. Your refusal to help me is nowhere near professional.”

"Well, I would hate for anyone to misconstrue our relationship. ‘Or a lack thereof?’  Isn't that what you said we are the other night? No relationship, since I'm this big and exciting movie star. No room for friends to care for, just a self-centered celebrity, correct?" 

She winced at his words. An anger raged that was unusual for Tom, especially in a working situation.

She held her head in her hand as she lowered her voice, “No, no, that’s not what I meant. I—“ she trailed off, desperate for words that could accurately describe the minefield of emotions that plagued her in regard to him.

“Tom, I respect you and I hate to have this anger between us. I am not looking for something adversarial with you. We have worked together before. I believe we can do so again, despite what has happened this past year. Please, can we try at least attempt to be friendly?” She wanted to reach out to him, put her hand on his shoulder or his arm.  If she did, he would know how she felt. That she could not bear his ill will--especially when she wanted the opposite from him.

Annie opened the door and with cautious eyes, looked over at the pair, searching for signs of an impending (or completed) brawl.  Noelle didn’t hear her, over her own breaths increasing under his gaze. Tom’s deep blue eyes never left Noelle’s face as he allowed a small smile at the corners to form.

“Okay. For you, Noelle, I can do that.”

Annie cleared her throat as she held up the maroon shirt with a breast plate and leather pants for Tom to wear.  Noelle’s eyes roamed over the pants and pictured how they would look on Toms lean and long limbs.  How they would accentuate all his features and highlight all the muscular detail in his—

“Noelle? Are you okay?” Annie asked, concern filling her features and voice.  

“Hmm?” Noelle swallowed as her face turned scarlet.  Tom started to chuckle beside her and she knew he picked up on exactly what caught her attentions.

She cleared her throat, “Well, on second thought, I think we should keep Tom’s hair this length.” Her fingers dragged through the long hair over the top of his head and down the back, causing the man to close his eyes at the sensation. She felt a slight vibration, a hum that came from Tom's chest at her touch.

Speaking quickly, she stated, “I’m thinking auburn for the hair color? Something in a gingery blonde. Also, I think we should keep the goatee.”

* * *

 

_Another field, another tent, another large group of actors and crew in front of me.  However, this time the roles have changed.  The stakes are higher.  It’s also ridiculously fucking cold._

With a sigh, Noelle regarded the large grouping of people in front of her.  They had been on  _Hollow Crown_ for almost a week. She was happy that she was settling into her role of Makeup Director and that her crew was professional and supportive.  She harkened back to the days of working with Polly. She remembered how that woman made her hair stand on end and her stomach turn in knots.  Now, she channeled that energy into her own daily speeches, with a little less frigidity.

With a huff she stood up on the chair, “Good morning everyone!” she hollered over the heads of the staff in front of her.

“Everyone has their minor and principal actors they will be working with today? We have a battle scene coming up, so please, make sure you are using red number forty on each individual. That color shows best in natural light, which we will have an abundance of today." She waved her hand to the fields beyond the tent, now covered in burgeoning sunlight and pulling away the cool fog that remained.

“If anyone has any questions, feel free to send them my way. Otherwise, it’s five minutes to actors coming in from costuming! Thank you!” With a hop, she hit the cold ground underneath her boots. Noelle grabbed her coffee as she strode to the line of trailers on the edge of the grassy plain.  Before she entered, her eyes trailed over Mark and Stephanie, who she hired as her main assistants on the films.

She was lucky enough to gain her experience and knowledge through others offering her the support.  She was glad to do the same for her two colleagues on  _War Horse_.  Mark gave her a thumbs up before Noelle headed into the large silver trailer.  

Pulling out the kits she was using for the battle scenes, she began her ritual of organizing as the door swung open behind her. She looked over her shoulder to catch a glance of Tom as he ducked his head through the confined entrance.

"Morning, Miss Garguilo." he said, with the ever-present twinge of laughter in his words. Things between them became cordial once filming began and she was thrilled.  It was close, so close, to how they were the year before.  The exhaustion of each day, however, made it impossible for her to even leave her room to eat, let alone have some type of meaningful conversation. Their interactions were contained to the cramped quarters of her work space.

"Morning, Your Grace," she said, turning for a clearer view of her companion. He was wearing Henry's suit of armor, the battle ridden chest plate that had dents and scuff marks all over it.  Bits of chainmail and leather dotted his costume, his boots remained covered in dirt and grass.  

He slumped in the chair, cradling his paper coffee cup, "Big day today. Battle scene number...two, I believe?"

"At least no more horses this week," she said with a wink as she mixed up some colors for his face.  A hand raced through the golden-red colored curls on the top of his head.  

"Thank goodness, I'm quite sore from all that riding." His eyes focused on his feet while the corners of his mouth bounced up and down. Noelle had to bite her lips from laughing.  

She cleared her throat, "I don't know, it seems to be a thing for you.  Just wait for the  _War Horse_ premieres, I heard they're bringing your equine friends to join you guys on the carpet." She twisted her hair up into a bun on the top of her head, loosely tying the curls with a ribbon.

She looked up to find his eyes on her before he placed the cup down on his leg, "Why aren't you coming with us? It's only for a day and a half, most of the interviews will be at the hotel. Benedict is going, and we get to stay at the Mandarin. Come on, it'll be like old times!"

She pulled her chair up to him, her leg brushing against his as she flicked some of his hair away from his forehead, "I remember them quite vividly, Tom. Some not so vividly, as well. I can't just up and leave for New York. I have responsibilities here on set."

"No you don't. I saw the schedule, it's basic exterior shots and set up. Your assistants could easily manage the cast members."

Noelle focused on the palette in her hands.  She was not sure how she should feel about the fact he had checked her filming schedule against the premiere date.  Tapping the brush against her hand, she found herself avoiding his gaze.

"I will check. If it's possible, I would love to go.  I haven't been to New York in a couple of years. It's quite magical at Christmastime." She ran the brush up his forehead and down onto his cheekbones.

He nodded, as if this was her confirmation of acceptance, "Good, you should do this for yourself. You have been working non-stop since last year and deserve a couple of days."

"You sound like another Brit I know. One I know far too well," she said with a laugh.  

"We did have dinner the other night.  Maybe Ben’s rubbing off on me."  

_Interesting_ , Noelle thought,  _Benedict never said anything to me about meeting Tom._

Her fingertips glided over his cheekbones with the foundation and he remained fixated on the features of her face.  His mouth dropped open, just enough for Noelle to feel the caress of his breath over her skin.

Dipping into the darker colors, Noelle began outlining the smudges and spots that mimicked the blood and dirt Tom would receive in battle. Her eyes narrowed on his face, making sure the dark red lines remained bright enough to stand out over the blacks and blues interspersed on his skin.

She was so engrossed in her work, she never heard him speak.  He pulled back, an eyebrow raised to catch her attentions.

Her hands dropped from his face, "I'm sorry.  Did you say something? I was in the zone there for a moment."

He laughed, sticking his tongue out through his teeth, "I was asking you how you've been.  Haven't seen you around after filming."

"Well," she said morosely, "I learned after six weeks with the two of you that drinking and dancing every night isn't productive on a movie set.  Especially now as a Director, I have to put on my adult shoes and look like I know what I'm doing."

"You more than know what you're doing, Noelle. You are doing an amazing job. You have an impressive crew.  Our keeping to schedule is due to the work you and costuming and everyone else is putting in to make this series a success."

She felt his leg bounce off the ground, rubbing against hers.  It was a sight she remembered fondly.  

"Anyway," he continued, "I was curious if you wanted to have dinner one night? Strictly professional. I figured you might need to eat every now and again."

A year later and he still had the ability to make her heart soar at his words, while still keeping her grounded.

"Sure. I'd really like that, Tom."

* * *

 

Noelle brushed down her silk shirt, picking at nonexistent lint until she heard her name echo behind her.  She saw Tom striding towards her with a lilting smile.

It was a quaint little restaurant in one of the hotels that many of the cast and crew were housed. Due to the long term nature of the filming, some crew--like Noelle--had permanent rooms in some of the larger establishments.  The short-term cast were housed in the smaller, cozier hotels.

They met at Tom's, and he reflected his surroundings. Wearing a soft black cardigan over his jeans, his hand lingered on Noelle's back as they entered the restaurant.  Noelle continued to be thrown by this whole situation. It was another volley in a relationship with so many back and forth moments over the last year.

One day they were a couple, the next they ended with an explosion.  One moment she apologized for her actions and he kissed her. In the next moment, he had a girlfriend.  They spent a glorious day together in the heart of Rome, only to argue in the middle of the night at her doorstep.

All of it became, at times, too much to bear. Yet, here she was across from him at the table, ordering drinks.

“What are you thinking of this so far?” she asked, after a comfortable pause.  Noelle had to admit to herself, while she was asking about the production, there was more—much more—behind her words.

_He is single again.  I heard it from several people, including Marcella. I hope I’m not taking this invitation with too much weight._

“I have to say I'm impressed at how we've been managing with filming all these scenes—thank you,” he paused as their drinks came and he inhaled about half of the beer before the glass hit the table.

“Having a seasoned profesional like Sam Mendes on board makes things a great deal easier. Although, I’m used to performing Shakespeare, it’s hard to project on a small scale.”

“Small?” she asked.

“Performing in front of a a live audience is enthralling. An actor feeds off of the energy. You hear their laughter, their sighs, the gasps.  When the tempo changes to fear or anger, you sense it and run with it.

“On film, there’s no energy to harness, no surge of emotion that you could tap into when you feel like you’re fading.  While we take breaks and we’re able to regroup, there is nothing like performing these plays live for others.  

“Conversely, having this as a TV special will bring Shakespeare to the masses next summer. People who do not attend the theater, either because they can’t afford it or it’s not playing in their area will now have that opportunity. They will be introduced to Shakespeare's words. I’ll admit, I’m quite proud to be a part of that.  The same goes for you too.”

She was so engrossed in listening to him speak, that his compliment did not register in her brain at first. Noelle responded with a shake of her head and laughed.

“I’m just the makeup girl.” She jumped as Tom’s hand hit the table, his palm causing ripples across the tops of both of their drinks.

“No. You’re not.”  Noelle’s fingers curled around her glass at his words. They were strong but compassionate.

“Noelle, you’ve been a professional in our industry now for more years than I’ve been acting in movies. Do you realize that? It’s a long and arduous process to get here.  How could you degrade yourself into unimportant? You’re more than that.

“You bring people to life on screen. Whether you harken a character to the early 1900s or the 1600s or propell them into the future, you have a gift. I know others have dared to say you’re not important in this industry.  You are, and you need to believe that.

“You’re the one coordinating everyone before the scenes are shot. You’re the one that they chose to head up not one, but four films for the BBC. You’re the one Stephen Spielberg asked to have on board for  _Lincoln_!” He stopped and reached across the table, his long arm easily crossing the distance to her hand.

“You need more people in your life to tell you that.  Maybe that’s why we’re together again on this production.” The waitress came over with their dinners of fish and chips and Noelle went to retract her hand from Tom’s.  He refused to let go.  

He held it during their meal while they used their spare hands to eat their food.  He held her hand while they finished off their beers and Noelle refused another.  He only relented when she laughingly stated that she had to use the restroom, and he was not allowed in there.

She loved the feel of his skin on hers.  The intimate recall of those fingers dancing across her face, in her hair.  The sensation of his palm gliding over the curve of her hips and waist. The pressure from the tips digging into her skin.

His cheeks were tinted the slightest pink, the lines near his eyes a little more creased as the hours wore on.  They talked about their upcoming projects, their thoughts on the holidays. It was far too easy to slip into this comfort: the sly smiles and lazy laughter that passed between them. It all belied a connection far greater than two people on a movie set.

Noelle could feel the telltale exhaustion begin to creep its way back into her bones, but it was not overwhelming as other nights. She knew it was inevitable that her eyes would close and her senses would fail.  As if on cue, noting her demeanor, Tom called for the check. He hastily placed money, more than necessary, into the fold. He seemed to note that Noelle was fading fast.  Much like Cinderella at the ball, she only could spend a few more moments in his presence before she turned into Sleeping Beauty.

Tom refused to allow Noelle to walk back to her room unaccompanied. She once again found herself unable to argue with him, especially when his hand remained firm against the small of her back.  One quick elevator ride and they were in a similar position from over a year prior.

Noelle rested her back against her room door, looking up at Tom, “This was nice. I haven’t had a dinner that wasn’t something I grabbed on the way back to a hotel in ages. Makes me feel almost like a human again.”

Tom laughed, the breathy one that prompted his tongue to stick between his teeth, “Well, if that’s what I can do for you tonight, then I’m glad to oblige.” For a moment she caught the softness, the warmth in his eyes as he gazed down in the pale light of the hallway.

Noelle could not determine what emboldened her, maybe from the dinner, maybe it was being in his presence. She reached for his hand and held it.  Her fingers dragged across his knuckles and played in the spaces between.

“We need to stop meeting in places like this,” she whispered. He took a tentative step towards Noelle and she grasped his fingers a bit tighter as her breath quickened.

Tom nodded, a small smile forming on the corners of his lips.  He bent down, but stopped at her forehead—placing a chaste and sweet kiss against her skin.  Noelle found herself holding back the sigh that was in her chest.  As Tom pulled away, it was her turn to maintain the hold on his hand.

“I don’t know how to do this,” she admitted, and Tom tilted his head, before questioning her words.

“To do what?”

“I want to kiss you. Not a peck on the cheek or a glance off your jaw.  A kiss like the ones we had before.  A kiss like those you gave me during the nights we were together in Hampshire. Like the one in California?”

Tom glanced downward at their shoes, “You mean that?”

She paused. His question flamed her fears that brewed beneath the surface. _Was this not what he wanted as well? Was this all friendly and I took things too far? Maybe I was too presumptuous and stupid in thinking that he wanted me again after all this time._   

She was about to turn and open the door to her room, when Tom’s free hand found her cheek.  Their eyes met, once more, and Noelle decided to push all those fears and concerns away.  This time she was taking a stand.

She pushed upward on her toes and met his lips with hers.  The hand on her cheek wound towards her neck, pushing her closer to his body.  Their entwined hands released and Noelle let her arms drape around his broad shoulders.  She was glad his other arm held onto her waist, as it kept her from sinking into the ground.

It was a kiss like the previous ones, and even better than all of them combined. He dragged his tongue against her bottom lip and without hesitation, she allowed him entrance.  It was impossible that she forgot how amazing his kisses were, but Tom reminded her in an instant.  Her knees weakened and he guided her back to the door, resting her on the firm metal.  

It did not take long for them to run out of air. When they separated, Tom slipped his mouth along her neck. He repeated his actions against her skin, tracing lines with his tongue over her pulse.  Noelle let out a halting sigh, when she realized they were still in a hotel hallway.

She tilted her head away from Tom, both of them breathing heavily in the heated air around them, “I— _God_ —I hate to do this.”  Tom nodded as Noelle placed her hands on his chest, feeling the taut muscles under her fingers. That sensation did not help her at all in what she wanted to say to him.

“Can we take this a little, um, slow?” She spoke methodically, to let the words sink in, but Tom reacted in an instant and smiled.  

“We're here for the foreseeable future. You can't get away from me that easily. There is no rush.” The last of his words were almost pressed into her lips as he kissed her again. When they broke apart, Noelle remained quite intoxicated from their embrace and contemplated about the 'taking it slow' already.  

“You know what this means though, don’t you, Noelle?” The words floated into her ear as he spoke mere inches from her skin. She lazily shook her head in the negative.

"This means you’re coming with me to New York."  


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Noelle travels to New York for the War Horse premiere in December 2011. After she shows him around the greatest city in the world (sorry, had to say that!) at Christmastime, things take a dramatic turn. NSFW.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you are enjoying the story! We're heading into the final act of these two and their origins story. Come see more and all their inspirations at crescent-moon-rising.tumblr.com!

 

Noelle noticed the raised eyebrow of the cabbie in the rear view. _Is he seriously aggravated by snapping gum? Can’t be the worst thing he’s ever heard in here._  

She assumed it was retaliation as the car took a sharp turn onto Central Park West.  She caught his smile, rolling her eyes in response.  She continued to reel from the effects of transcontinental flight as it overwhelmed her body.  Between going through customs, retrieving her bag and fighting at the arrivals bay for a cab, she was spent.  

However, the chimes that rang in succession on her phone indicated that rest was not an option right away.  She wondered if the two Brits who were inundating her message box were standing next to each other.  One chime would ring and then ten seconds later, another one.  She might have thought it was comical if it was not for the raging headache she had from a lack of decent coffee.  

_> >Where are you?   –Ben_

_> >Did you land yet?  –Tom_

_> >You said your flight came into JFK at 11 are you almost here?  –Tom_

_> >We have another set of interviews at 1 where are you!? –Ben_

Noelle decided, after another sharp brake of the taxi almost sent her into the glass partition, that she’d text them both at the same time.

_I swear, sometimes I feel as if I’m dealing with a set of hyperactive twins._ With an audible sigh, she opened her screen.  

_> >I am in a cab, which is hurtling me towards my death.  If not, you’ll see me in the lobby in five minutes. —Noelle_

She closed her phone as the taxi screeched to a halt, almost sideswiping a bus in the process.  Living in London for over a decade had taken her out of the insane pace of American cities. New York was no exception.  

White knuckled and holding onto the handle above her window, Noelle sucked in her breath. The cab raced forward at the green light toward her destination. She could make out the tall building that buffered Columbus Circle, The Mandarin Hotel. It gleamed in the sunlight which spread over Manhattan.  

The cab rounded the bend, with a jerk into the driveway as two valets rushed over.  Off balance, in addition to jetlagged, Noelle took a moment to right herself. Holding onto the cab door for support, she viewed the expanse of Central Park, sadly without the lush greenery she so enjoyed.  Rather, it was bare but dense and the line went as far as her eye could take her until it ended at the beginning of the East Side and Park Avenue.  For a moment, even though she was several hundred miles away from her ‘technical’ one, she felt as if she’d come home.  

“They let you back in the country? I’m surprised, Garguilo. I believe they detain wanted felons at the arrival gate.“

Her eyes turned to the lilting voice of Brit number one: Benedict. She sighed while tipping the attendants, “I told them I was on a recognizance mission to collect a surly actor who tends to get himself in trouble on movie sets. Something about threatening the crown and the Royal Family after a few pints?”

Benedict gasped with a hand over his mouth, “Watch yourself! That’s considered treason back home.  Never talk about our Queen Mum that way.” He enveloped her within two warm arms. Losing her breath at his enthusiastic squeeze, she laughed into his chest.

“Missed you too, darling. I’m assuming they’re keeping a short leash on you two? Hence your anticipation of my arrival with bated breath?” He chuckled, rumbling through the suit jacket and tie he still wore.

“My countryman has been bouncing all over waiting for you to show up. I could care less.” Noelle smacked him in the arm as he smiled with two sparkling blue eyes.  One hand grabbed her valise, the other rested on her shoulder as they walked into the lobby.

"We have another round in fifteen minutes.  Shall I grab you afterwards? Not for nothing, you look a little worse for wear.” With a sigh, Noelle leaned onto his shoulder as they waited for her cards.

“You certainly know how to make a girl feel good about herself, Cumberbatch.” He squeezed her a little tighter, mumbling against the side of her head.

“Ah, I have to give you a hard time. You’d wonder if something was wrong if I didn’t.”  Noelle handed over her ID and passport to the concierge, while Ben continued.

“Anyway, you know I’m glad you’re here, darling girl.” he said, “It would be utterly boring with just me and Tom.  God knows, he never shuts up, especially about you.  I almost threw my day old muffin that was declared breakfast at him this morning.”  Noelle laughed to herself, picturing a hyperactive Tom against a grumpy Ben.

“I promise to keep him occupied so you can finally get some relief.” Ben pulled away from her, eyebrows raised with a cheeky grin playing against his lips.

“That’s not what I meant! God, must you always go there?” Both dissolved into laughter as Noelle took her keycards and headed towards the elevators.  She could not help but wonder if that was a possibility while in New York City.

Tom had been respectful of her wishes to keep things slow while they were on set for The Hollow Crown.  They had been seeing each other every night after dinner, ending up in each other’s arms in one of their rooms. She felt like a teenager, concerned that her father would be knocking on the door to tell them to cut it out. Thankfully, Tom seemed to know right when to stop, right before Noelle would have lost her nerve and stripped them of both their clothing.

She kept the nagging suspicion that part of their first failure was a result of a rapid descent into bed.  Not that she complained, at the time. In fact she realized afterwards he was one of the more attentive and giving lovers she had in her life.  Every time he pressed his taut torso on top of her, mouth and tongue dancing against her skin, she remembered of how his bare touch sent shivers throughout her body.

Ben broke through her thoughts, "I’m going to run back to our interview room, and let your puppy dog know you arrived.” With a brief peck on his cheek, Noelle headed towards the elevators.  

She caught a hazy glimpse of herself in the steel doors.  Her hair was askew, curls falling out of the pony tail at the top of her head. Her jeans and shirt were wrinkled from the long trip and her body seemed to slump over into itself.  Her mind drifted into thoughts of a nap, or even better, a bath. With a squeak, she jumped from a hand sliding in the almost closed doors.  

They reopened, to Brit number two: Thomas.  He stood, chest heaving as if he had just completed a race.  His copper toned curls almost covered his forehead, his deep blue eyes focused on the woman in front of him.  Noelle found herself smiling wildly in response, appreciating the sharp navy suit he wore for his interviews.

“Good. You’re alone,” and before she could even speak, his mouth was on hers. She fumbled against the lapels of his jacket, melting into his strong arms as they held onto her face.  She thought she heard bells dinging, felt of the ascent of the elevator upward, but it was all a haze of Tom’s tongue and mouth.

Any ideas of this being a chaste trip were erased in those few moments.  He pulled away, both their lips bright pink from the kiss. When the bell dinged again, it announced her floor.  

“I–I think this is me,” she stuttered, trying to catch her breath.  His smile grew on his face as he backed away, pulling her with him.  

“Quite important to be aware of exactly where your room is, Miss.“  He dipped his head again, close enough to run his tongue up her neck to behind her ear. She knew the sounds that escaped her mouth were nowhere near acceptable outside of a bedroom.

Pushing him away, he outright laughed at her while Noelle attempted to collect herself into a form of coherence. She straightened her disheveled hair and clothes  before attempting to speak.

“Don’t you have an interview? An appointment? Something?” she gasped as he snickered some more.

“Yes, but I came out to the lobby and Ben said you were here. I had to see you.” The laughter ended as his fingers traced a line over her cheek and rested on her neck.

“I missed you.”

She was not sure how he managed to do it, managed to make her lose time and place when he said those things. Was it his voice, that throaty laugh that always permeated his words? They had fallen right back into those comfortable patterns of a year ago.  The ones that were filled with laughter and stolen glances. The times she felt like that heady teenager again.

Noelle tried to ignore the gnawing in her chest that said it was all a facade. Leaning against the doors, she ran her fingers through his long curls, which were to remain that way until they finished Henry V.  

“I missed you too.  However, you’re going to get into trouble if you don’t get that butt back downstairs.”

“I thought you liked my butt?”

“You’re pushing it now, Hiddleston,” she said while closing her eyes.  When she opened them, the mischievous glints in within his ocean blues reappeared to greet her.

“Okay, but the second we’re done, you and I have a date. Understood, Miss Garguilo?” With a sigh she watched as his lips grew closer to hers.

“Fine, now get said butt back into the elevator,” and she sidestepped him, throwing his tall frame off balance.  He caught himself, just as the elevator dinged and the doors opened. Noelle flailed her arms away from him, shooing him inside.  

“Go, you’ve got work to do.”

Clicking his heels together and giving her a salute, the devil appeared in his smile once more as the doors closed.  Noelle shook her head as she walked down the hallway towards her room.

“He’ll be the death of me, I swear it.”

* * *

_> >You awake? Or do you require assistance getting out of your bed? :)_

With a huff through her nose, she texted Tom back:

_> >If you were here, getting OUT of the bed would not be your first choice.  I’ll be in the lobby in a minute.  _

That was where she found him, with a black quilted jacket to insulate from the December cold.  Without saying a word, she wrapped her arm around his, with a long inhale of his cologne. Instantly, they were hit with a gust of wind, and Noelle wondered if her flannel shirt and puffy vest were enough.

Tom pulled Noelle a bit closer to his lean frame. She smiled inwardly as they headed out to Central Park West.

“So, any requests to where you want to go today, good sir?”

The two never stopped moving, although Tom narrowed his eyes with a bit of a lilt in his voice, “In October when we came for Comic Con, I was in Midtown and I got to see all the usuals: The Empire State, Trump Tower, Rockefeller Center.  Any thoughts on something different?”

Her smile grew as they continued up Broadway, “I have a couple of ideas.” Never losing his arm around hers they marched up the crowded streets headed towards her destinations.  She wanted to show Tom the part of New York she felt would be perfect for him.

Now that the tree had been lit the previous week in Rockefeller Center, the city was bustling with tourists and shoppers as well as the millions of people who worked on the island.  Noelle and Tom weaved in and out of the crowds that became thicker and more distracted as they continued towards Dante Park.  

Waiting at the light to cross the footbridge into Lincoln Center Plaza, a blast of wind blew her hair around her face.  She was about to absentmindedly return her hand into her pocket as Tom’s gloved fingers wound around hers, holding them against his leg.  She searched his face, his own eyes remaining focused on the large expanse in front of them.  It was a simple gesture, but one that surprised Noelle still.

They scurried across to the Plaza, first stop at the fountain which continued to flow in the cool temperatures. Tom pulled a coin out of his pocket and tossed it in the air.

“If I throw it in, does that mean you’ll come back here with me?”

She giggled, with a twist of her own coin in her fingers, “No, I don’t believe this fountain has the same magical properties as the one in Rome.  However, I’ll make you a deal.”  Tom turned with his eyebrows raised, in anticipation of her words.

“I’ll give you a pop quiz later at my discretion.  If you pass, I promise you another guided tour.”

He pondered the terms for a second before he nodded, “Deal.”

They both reared back and tossed in their coins.  Noelle watched a second longer, as the water shimmered from the dancing sunlight through a clear and cloudless sky.  Her smile grew across her face, basking in this moment with him.

Noelle snapped back to reality, and the cold. Tom dug his hands into his jacket while rocking back and forth on his heels. Pulling a lanyard with an ID out of her bag, she looped it onto her neck and dragged him towards Lincoln Center first.

“What does that say on there?” Tom said, brow furrowed.

“ _Media Relations._   I got this during Fashion Week here two years ago and found it’s quite useful to get in and out of the buildings. It’s not going  too far, but it’ll allow us to take a closer peek without having to be hindered by some pesky tour guide.” Tom laughed, almost bending in half before continuing next to Noelle.

“I had no idea you were so devious, Noelle. Quite frankly, I’m not just shocked but impressed.”

“You should be, Tom,” she said with a wiggle of her eyebrows.

They entered the massive building, with the sky high ceiling and tear drop chandeliers that cascaded throughout the space. She maneuvered them through the atrium to the rear doors of the theater, where they stood to view the stage and seating.

“It’s amazing,” Tom said, with a bit of awe permeating his words. Noelle turned to face him. She watched his eyes widen as he looked upon the empty yet cavernous space.

“Could you imagine performing on this stage? I mean: Shakespeare, Sondheim, Williams–it’s all been here in front of this massive audience.  The sheer talent that has graced these walls. I could only dream to make it to this level.”

“Who says that you won’t?” Noelle asked, facing him, “Your career is right on the edge of exploding.  You don’t work with Spielberg and Branagh without it meaning something in this business.”

He huffed, dipping his head down to his chest, “Yes, but this–this is beyond anything one person could dream.”

“Not for you, you could do this.  You would be unbelievable on this stage.”  Tom remained silent, facing the curtains and shimmering lights.  Noelle saw his awe, the reverence in his eyes.

“Well, if you’re impressed by this, I promise you something even more magical next door.  Second stop, let’s go.” They exited the building to enter the one in the middle of the plaza.  

The Metropolitan Opera House gleamed in the afternoon light, illuminating the massive crystal chandelier to sparkle beyond measure.  It accented the massive, jaw dropping staircase to the top.  They stood in the atrium, music swirling around them. Practice was underway for one of the performances, and Noelle placed her hand on Tom’s chest.

“I don’t think I’ll be able to get us inside if they are in rehearsals, but listen.”

After the music swelled, his eyes lit with recognition, “I know this song,” Tom said as she grinned with pride, “ _Nessun Dorma._ “

They stood for a moment, embraced by the melodies as they swirled around the atrium. It was only the music, but Noelle could hear the words in Italian as if she sang them herself.

"Many know the aria, but do you know the story behind it?” Tom shook his head in the negative as they entered the plaza once more, headed to the final stop on the tour.  

“Ah, Turandot. The cold, unfeeling princess of a far away land. A handsome stranger correctly answers her three questions to all potential suitors. She is infuriated by his success.  However, the suitor gives her the chance out of the marriage.” She held up a finger as Tom intently watched Noelle’s mouth while she spoke.  

“If she finds his true identity before sunrise, he dies.  If not, they are to wed.  In the course of the evening, denying it all the while, she realizes he has captured her heart. In an act of love, he reveals himself to her–placing his life in her hands.

"Turandot takes this mischievous man to her father and declares she knows his name: Love. It’s one of the less bloody and happier Operas out there.” Noelle realized she had stopped walking, as Tom appeared entranced by her story.

Tom twisted a lock of her hair in his fingers, smiling just enough for his tongue to dance over his teeth, “You continue to surprise me, Miss Garguilo, even after knowing you for over a year. Who taught you all about Opera?”

They continued their walk as she laughed, ”Well, when you’re Italian it is part of your heritage. I listened to this music for most of my youth, every Sunday during dinner.”

Her eyes turned wistful at the memory, of  long afternoons at an elongated table.  Her and her sisters arguing over the meatballs as her mother scolded them.  Her father scolding her mother to let them be, and then singing himself while drinking his wine.  Happier memories that felt like ages ago.  

They entered the third building, the one Noelle was most eager to see as rehearsals were ongoing.  However, she did not need her badge to get through this time.  She waved to a gentleman at a set of nondescript doors.  With a quick twist of his fingers, he opened one.  The duo found themselves in the darkness of the backstage of the New York City Ballet.

“Who’s that?” came from Tom’s lips, his voice rising just enough for Noelle to catch it.

“An old friend of mine from back on the West End.  He’s been with the company now for almost four years doing makeup and hair.  You’d be surprised how much they need him for these shows.  Forty girls on one stage, all requiring perfection.” She fell silent at the bells which announced the awakening of the dancer in the spotlight.  

They stood to watch preparation for the seminal show of the holiday season: _The Nutcracker._   Noelle was spellbound as _The Dance of the Sugar Plum Fairy_ began. The ballerina gracefully toed her way across the stage, dancing between the mice and the soldiers.  

Tom dipped his head to her, barely audible, “Why do I think you would have loved to be on that stage?”

“You’d be a hundred percent correct,” she sighed as she watched the Prima twirl and bend, all while on the tips of her toes. As she landed from an arabesque with a bow, the company applauded, along with the spectators on the side. Noelle’s chest tightened, her eyes watering just enough to sting.

When they reached the outside, the wind swirling around them, Tom brushed a thumb over her lips.  It rested on her cheek, his soft eyes opening the space between them for her to explain. Shoving her hands into her pockets, Noelle watched the cars zoom by as she began to speak.

“When I was younger, I loved to dance.  Ballet was my life. I would take classes, as many as possible for each level to keep getting better.  I remember being so excited to finally be able to take pointe, finally get those gorgeous shoes to lace up my legs.  I didn’t care that I was going to be in terrible pain, the bleeding, the calluses. It was all worth it for that honor.

“At the same time my ankles became ready to support those shoes, my body changed.  I grew boobs, hips.  I was always shorter than the other girls, but now it was clear. According to my teachers, I wasn’t the ‘right’ shape anymore for a ballerina.

"Once they heard that, my parents weren’t willing to pay for the classes.  If it wasn’t something that would be sustainable for me in later years, what was the point? The money could go towards something more important, like schooling or our home. Money was scarce, so that was it. No more dancing.”

She quieted as they headed back towards Broadway and Columbus Circle.  Noelle was about to ask if he wanted something to eat when she realized he stopped in his tracks.

“If I told you that it was a blessing you didn’t dance, would you believe me? That you are  doing the work that you were born to do, because you are so incredibly talented. Would you think me a liar?” One eyebrow raised as he crossed his arms.  

Initially, she wanted to deny it, tell him he was wrong.  She breathed in the cool air, mixed with the scent of pretzels and the ringing of bells on the street.  Tom pulled her into his arms, her hands roaming into the warmth underneath his jacket. Her nose pressed against his chest, still holding the clean scent of his  cologne.  

He kissed her temple, resting his head against hers, “It’s the truth.”

With a deep sigh, she took his hand in hers before speaking, “Come on, we’ve both had a long day.”

* * *

After separating with a promise of dinner, Noelle had barely taken off her jacket when there was a knock on her door.  Peeking, she saw the familiar frame filling her vision.

“You forgot something,” Tom grinned, as he held out an empty hand.

“What did I forget?” Her head turned to her bag, before she retreated into her room. She was backed up by Tom’s frame walking toward her.  With a giggle, she crossed her arms, as he leaned against the closed door.  

"I believe there was to be a question and answer portion scheduled today?”

Noelle let out a loud laugh, thinking he was joking, but he furthered the thought.

“I’m serious! You promised me a return visit if I was attentive and I would like to demonstrate my learned expertise.”  He reached out for her, to allow one of his long fingers to caress the skin of her palm.

“Okay.” she murmured, while inching closer to him, “Three questions.” His feet shifted to  place one on the door, holding her hands all the while.

“Which of the places we visited had the grand staircase and crystal chandelier?”

Pulling her closer, his other hand grasped her waist, “That would be the Metropolitan Opera House.”

“Correct.  Second question,” she whispered as her mouth grazed against his neck. She dropped her voice to a whisper, asking, “What did Turandot say was the name of the mystery suitor who stole her heart?”

He let out a small sigh as her mouth found the sensitive point, her lips barely touching the heated skin.

“Love,” he said, his voice cracking just enough for Noelle to smile against his ear.

“Correct again.  Final question.” With a long sigh, her free hand went to his cheek to turn his face toward her.

“Care for a late dinner?” She recognized the hunger spread across his face. The last time she saw it was a year ago in another hotel room in North Hampshire.  His mouth immediately descended on hers and caught her off guard. She had missed the feel of his goatee, as it grazed and pricked her skin.

A deep inhale preceded  before he grabbed her tighter against his body. She met his tongue with hers and for the briefest of seconds, he hesitated. Noelle’s heart slammed in her chest, almost feeling as if it would burst. Proving her point, she pressed her lips against Tom’s, her tongue flicking over his lips to regain entrance.  He muffled a moan, causing Noelle to smirk a bit at his eagerness. When she took a breath, she found his eyes full of lust: glazed over, and curious.  

With a lift of his arm, he hoisted her off the ground and pulled her towards her bed, his lips never entirely leaving hers. With a bounce they landed on the mattress and Noelle scrambled to pull off her shirt while Tom did the same.  Before he kissed her again, she maneuvered Tom on his back, while she straddled across his waist.  

Her skin was alight with fire as she dipped to kiss his neck.  The sounds when her mouth hit his pulse point, the lobe of his ear, the apex at his shoulder took her own breath away.  Tom’s hands dug into her hips, pressing her into the hardness that was undeniable underneath her.

Her hands retraced the memory of his muscles as she caressed every inch she could reach.  Her lips followed, tongue and teeth joining to tease him, prompting the guttural moans that flowed from his chest.  Her hands went to unfasten his belt, the button and fly soon following.  

One hand on his waistband, the other caressing him through his boxers, Tom gasped before moaning, “ _Noelle_.” It was all the prompting she needed to slink down onto the bed, her hand against his taut length before her mouth closed around the tip.  With a whimper from Tom, her tongue soon followed.  

She felt the tightness of his hand as it wound into her hair, grasping the curls to guide her. Her tongue dragged up and down, from the base to the top and over again.  When her eyes flicked upward, she saw his free hand bury into his own hair, his chest heaving at a halting pace. His gasps grew, drawn from deep within his chest.

“N—no. No.” She released him with a slight pop, watching his eyes widen on her while he continued to reach for air. Guiding her back up to him, he pulled her onto his chest before claiming her lips again.

“I need you, Noelle,” he murmured and Noelle realized it was entirely mutual.  Kicking off her jeans and lingerie, she guided herself onto him—taking her time to relish in every inch of him filling her to the hilt. When his fingers traced the curve of her breasts, he glanced off the pink tips before grasping them in his firm hands.  She locked her eyes with his, she moved her hips, pulling him in and out at a painstaking pace.

It had been so long since they were entwined, so long to have their bodies melded together that Noelle felt herself building up, trying hard to hold back the explosion that threatened to burst.  His hands moved from her breasts, to her arms, her back, her hips, and the sensations drove her mad. The want of having him again, now being fulfilled, was almost too much for her to bear.

Automatically she moved faster, gliding up and down his length, digging her hands into his chest. The tension was pulling her, willing her to hurtle towards release.  When their eyes met again, Tom pushed himself up on one hand, his other keeping her still against his body

The commanding voice, the one that drove her mad back in the English countryside returned, “I’ve wanted you for so long, Noelle.” She gasped, the feel of him stirring inside of her prompting her to float on the edge.  She tried to move, but found herself unable to gain the friction she wanted more than air at that moment.

“Tom, please,  _please_ ,” she wailed and he captured her once more in a passionate kiss.  His hips thrust up into her and her mouth dropped open, pulling away as the coil wound within. Her arms remained firmly wound around his back, and with his guidance she fell apart on him.  Every moan and pant sounded like a crescendo of music, reaching it’s majestic conclusion.  

The sharp stubble of his chin ran against the column of her neck and ears, grazing her cheeks along with the softness of his lips. He allowed her the moment, only that, before he flipped her onto her back.  Noelle remained in a dreamy state, months of tension and confusion erased in each other’s arms.

Crawling up her body, her arms languidly pulling him closer, he entered her again.  Her eyes closed, tilting her head back onto the soft down pillows.  

He nipped at the skin of her neck, whispering,“ _Noelle, God_ ,” before picking up his rhythm.  Noelle turned her head to the side, the waves rolling and building up inside her core.  It was harder, and stronger; the tingling remaining from her toes and rushing up her legs.  Grazing her thighs over the back of his legs, she pressed him deeper into her folds.  

“You’re everything I’ve ever wanted,” he gasped into her ear. She kept her eyes closed, almost in disbelief, when one hand rested on her cheek, bringing her to his vision.

Panting, out of breath, his voice returned, “I’m not letting you go again.” She moaned before his mouth silenced her, as one hand eased between them to circle her sensitive spot.  A gasp flew off her lips as the sensation, along with a forceful roll of his hips, pushed her over the edge a second time.

This time brought him along with her.  She heard his groan in her ear, still high from her own lack of air. With a shudder, he pulled her into his arms, resting on his side.  One hand ran up and down her back, the other remained on her cheek.  

“I’ve wanted that since I left you, Noelle. I wanted you in California, to the point I couldn’t help myself in that cabana.  I wanted you in Rome, to whisk you back to my hotel after that day sight-seeing. I wanted you that night, in your home when you were infuriated with me.“ His words broke through his gasps for breath. Not wanting to wait for a response, he kissed her forehead and cheeks, her nose and finally her mouth.  

Exhausted beyond measure, her head dropped onto his shoulder.  Her fingers ran thorough the curls that lay haphazardly on his head, her voice so quiet, she wondered if he heard her.

“Promise me, Tom.  Please?”

“I promise. I won’t let you go.”

 

 


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In New York City for the grand premiere ofWar Horse with her former colleagues, Noelle receives a few unwelcome visitors during her stay. While things heat up with her and Tom, will she ever be able to let go of the belief that they will never make their relationship work? NSFW
> 
> For faceclaims and general frivolity, come on over to my tumblr page for more Tom & Noelle:  
> http://crescent-moon-rising.tumblr.com/post/122198282484/the-night-is-darkest-before-the-dawn-chapter-16

  
Noelle felt the brightness of the morning sun before her eyes opened to the unwelcome intrusion. _Damnit, I never closed the curtains._

She rolled away from the offending light and into the warm body next to her.  For that brief second, she was disoriented by the limbs that were askew underneath the soft hotel sheets.  In bits and flashes, she remembered the moments after their tour of Manhattan’s West Side, and the words he whispered while they lay together afterwards.  

_You know he didn’t mean those things.  You just had sex with him.  Remember who you are, Noelle._

She remembered eating bites of room service, followed by a long bath wrapped in Tom’s arms and legs. Next she remembered lying down on Tom’s bed.  The rest was blank. 

The body next to her stirred as one long and lean arm roped around her waist to bring her closer.

“Can’t sleep?” He mumbled onto the top of her head, the heat from his breath caressing her skin.

Her initial reaction was to pull away, but she was enveloped by Tom in every way imaginable.  His arms entwined around her, fingers caressing up and down the small of her back.  Even his ankle crossed over one of hers, pinning her to the bed without trying.

 _Guess I’m here for now,_  she mused before finding her voice, “I’m all thrown off from the flight yesterday. What happened?” Everything still remained a bit hazy in her memory.

“Well,” he said, while readjusting to bring his arm up and  through her hair, “After dinner and our bath, you sat on the bed. When I came back in here, you passed out.  Totally understandable, you were already exhausted from your flight, and our tour all over Manhattan.” He paused, leaving the next part of their day unsaid.

“You looked way too tired to move and I enjoy sharing my bed with you anyways.”

At that moment, Noelle looked down to find she was clad in one of Tom’s t-shirts.  Her eyes met his, which still kept a bit of the sleep within them but crinkled the same from his smile.

“I didn’t have anything else for you to wear.”  

Her heart skipped a little before the jolt ran across her skin, “Thank you for taking care of me.” They were so close, she could turn a fraction of an inch and her lips would touch his.  She pushed back the feelings of unease, the voices of the why’s and when’s attempting to pull her into their depths.  She was revived by the sound of his voice, still a bit hoarse from the early hour.

“Why did you get a hotel room, anyway?” he mused, his hand danced down her back and onto her hips. The pads of his fingers brushed against the curve as they trailed down one leg, pulling her closer.

“I guess I didn’t want to assume anything?” Noelle said, entirely distracted by his roaming which now caressed the inner part of her thigh.

“Assume away,” and his mouth found the apex of her neck and shoulder, his tongue and teeth brushing against her skin.  Quick learner, Noelle realized, as he went right for the spots that worked so well both last night and over a year ago.

Any shame she had in immediately melting into his touch was gone in an instant as his fingers started their way towards her delicate flesh, his mouth moving up the column of her neck towards her earlobe.

She let out a long sigh, moving under Tom’s body which hovered over hers.  Her fingers ran through his long curls, now almost as long as his hair was for  _Thor_.  It was the perfect length to pull when necessary, and she knew how he enjoyed that.

Noelle did the latter when his fingers danced on her folds, a feather light touch which sent sparks through her skin.  The groan that vibrated through his chest ran across hers, only heightening the heady feeling she had already from a few short minutes. Before he proceeded any further, she tore his shirt off her body and threw it onto the floor, wanting the feel of his bare skin and his scent against her.  Noelle feared she was already addicted to the weight of his body on her own.

She knew her voice sounded full of need and want when she said his name, and the smirk that formed on his lips only proved her point.  Noelle retaliated when she bit his lower lip, a little more forceful than necessary.  

Tom’s revenge was twofold, as his fingers pressed inside of her, filling her while simultaneously circling her nub with his thumb.  The overwhelming sensation almost hurtled her off the edge immediately, but Tom pulled his fingers all the way to the tip.  

“You’re teasing me,” Noelle panted.  Tom hissed his acknowledgement in her ear, as he began to thrust into her once more.

“Ah, but you like it,” and he increased his pace, her hips meeting him with his movements.  She felt like he was all over her all at once, his lips on her neck, his hands inside of her and in her hair.  It was all she could do from holding onto his shoulders before she believed she would dissolve into the bedding.

The thought she did, after one graze of his thumb, and his tongue on the curve of her breast.  Her eyes shot open as she felt the wave burst from her core and flow over her body, pulsating over ever inch of skin until she felt tingles in her toes and hair. Noelle lost focus as to whether she called Tom’s name, God’s or both in her enthusiastic exclamations afterwards.

“I wasn’t expecting that first thing this morning,” she mumbled into his hair as Tom’s mouth worked it’s way back up her chest and neck to her lips.  He ran his fingers across his tongue before they disappeared between his legs.

With a cocked eyebrow he mused, “I’d say that was satisfactory for the first thing.  Now onto the second…” and he ran his length down her already soaked folds, and eliciting another hiss from Noelle.

“Just shut up and kiss me,  _please_?”

“Right, shutting up now,” and he entered her just as their lips met.  He pressed deep inside of Noelle, her moans and his, muffled by their kisses.

Noelle pushed Tom away, just enough for him to open his eyes, full of confusion.  He understood as she moved to bring him underneath her, and he filled her again.  

“You always want the control, let me take over this time,” and he nodded, mouth open, mesmerized by the sight of Noelle astride his torso, as she rocked her hips back and forth.  Her hands danced over the definition in his stomach, running up the V and onto his sides.  A finger ran up her chest, stopping to caress one breast before Noelle took it and ran it across her lips.

Tom shuddered underneath her and she moved faster and faster, leaning to grip his shoulders for leverage.  Again, his hands moved to caress her body, her back, her ass, prompting her to bring them both the pleasure she so desperately wanted again. The sounds they both made resounded against the walls of Tom’s room, neither caring who heard them.

Noelle watched Tom’s eyes close and then open again, silently begging her to come with him. He met his hips with hers, snapping against her thighs as she felt the pressure build again, this time like a tidal wave rather than a slow roll.  

She gasped his name once more before the dam broke and she felt herself fall apart on him.  Tom quickly did the same, fingers buried deep in her hair before he gasped for air and he slumped into the bed, Noelle on top of him.  Noelle refused to move, she loved the feel of his heart beating in his chest like a drum against her ear.  She rose and fell with each pull for breath, as he remained limp as a rag doll.

“Don’t tell me you’re tired out already?”

“I could do this all day,” Tom replied, one hand in her hair, the other on her lips, “But I have interviews in a few.”

Noelle nodded, already aware of his schedule. She wanted to keep him there, keep him in that bed, because with him she lost the sounds of doubt in her mind.  However, that was not a possibility today.

After a few more kisses, Tom disentangled himself from Noelle and took the fastest shower she ever saw.  He raced back out, getting into a suit that was lying on the back of the chair in the far corner.

He slid the dark blue shirt over his shoulders as Noelle crossed one of her legs over the other, bouncing her foot in the air.  Her eyebrow raised just enough to make him pause.

“I’ll make sure I text you during those long and arduous interviews. Ben won’t be there today to keep you company? Shame, you’ll have to find ways to keep yourself _occupied_.”

He pulled a face, “What will you be doing, then?”

“Hmm, going to my room and maybe a shower and then some coffee?”

Tom laughed as he yanked his suit jacket from his garment bag, “Don’t be silly. Get your luggage and bring it down here.  No questions, no excuses—got it Garguilo?”

“Sure, Hiddleston, you got it.”  He bent down to kiss her one last time, but not before he hovered over her face, staring into her eyes.

“The gala begins at seven. We’ll go together?” There was a pause, a hesitation in his words.  If she did not know better, she swore it was concern that she might stand him up.

“Of course,” she breathed against his lips before she granted him with a kiss.  Her fingers ran under the collar of his shirt, playing against the skin.  Tom broke away from her and groaned, this time with a lace of frustration.

“You’re insatiable.”

Noelle scoffed, “Hardly, and not for nothing, if I am, it’s your fault.”

“That is true, I am pretty good.”

“ _Bastard_ ,” she snapped at his retreating form.  With one last wink, he ran a hand though his dark curls before closing the door behind him.

For a moment, Noelle thought about possibilities.  Retrieving her bag, getting dressed, finding food. All that went to the wayside as she lay in the sheets of Tom’s bed.  They retained his scent, the soft fabric caressing her naked body which still tingled from his touch.  She decided that she could be happy with a bit of a lie-in for the present time.

As her eyes began to close, still relishing the feel of Tom’s hands all over her, she heard her message bell chime. She suppressed a laugh.  _Does he miss me that much already?_   However, the name that flashed on her screen was not Tom’s.

_Issie: Hey! I have a surprise for you! Call me back ASAP!_

Noelle immediately sat up,  _What the hell is she talking about?_ She opened the screen and hit the call button.  It only took two tries before she heard her sister answer.  Noelle could hear the wind rushing in the background, creating a bit of interference on the line.

_“Hello darling sister! I have some great news!”_

“Hey Issie, what’s going on?” Noelle rubbed her hand behind her neck, looking out onto Central Park from the open windows.

_“I am currently driving down I-95 headed towards the glorious borough of Manhattan! We’re on our way to see you!”_

Noelle thought she heard a slam but it was her head dropping back into the pillows of the bed. The ringing in her ears was almost instantaneous.  With a hard swallow, she found her voice.

“You’re driving from MIT to see me? I’m only in for the day, Issie, I have the premiere tonight and—“

 _“—and you need to eat lunch don’t you? We haven’t seen you since the summer and that was only for a day in-between your schedules.”_ Isabelle had difficulty with holding back her excitement but also had an inability to allow anyone to finish a sentence.  It was that general enthusiasm that rocketed her through life.

Noelle felt her stomach pit before she spoke again, “We? Who’s with you Issie?” She almost did not want to hear the answer, afraid of the response.

She had good reason,  _“It’s me and Mom! Gabrielle had to stay home with Nicholas because he’s got a cold and Dad’s working, of course.  We haven’t been to New York in ages, what the hell! We miss you and want to see you and have lunch!”_

Noelle stopped breathing as realization hit:  _Isabelle and my mother are coming to New York to visit._

She wanted to scream.  Scream at the both of them and tell them to turn around, and go back home.  A host of excuses and apologies flooded her mind, but not one was valid. The fact remained they drove three hours from Massachusetts and had only an hour left on the drive.  Noelle knew, deep down, this was planned on her sister’s behalf to ensure that this meeting happened.  In any other situation, Noelle would have found an excuse or at least turned off her phone to make sure she could not be reached.

“S-so you’ll be here…”

_“I’d say within an hour or so, we just crossed from Westchester County and we’re headed to the Cross Bronx Expressway.  So, barring traffic, pretty soon, darling sis! You said the Mandarin Oriental Hotel at Central Park West, right?”_

Noelle’s head dropped into her hands.  _Why did I text her to tell her I was going to be in the States? I should have kept my big mouth shut.  No, because if the photos came up and they saw me in New York and they didn’t know, I’d never have heard the end of it. Damnned if I do…_

Noelle wanted off the phone, immediately, “Yes, Issie, I’ll be in the lobby waiting for you guys.”  She inhaled before she spoke and let out the air out with a string of lies.

“I can’t wait to see you both.”

* * *

Noelle paced by the reception area, trying to keep her cool. Her sister, she could manage.  The two of them got along pretty well most times, even though they fought like cats and dogs growing up.  They were sisters, they all had their moments.

However, whereas Noelle’s parents were happy to see her sail off to England at seventeen, Isabelle was a different situation. The baby of the family, and far and beyond the brightest of the three, she was constantly involved in academics, sports and clubs.  Dozens of Universities, including some Ivy League’s, courted her to attend their school.  

Her choice of Brown University was twofold: one for science and one for her closeness to home.  From there, she could remain under the watchful eye of their parents and still be far enough to enjoy her life. At Brown, she excelled  and became a rising star in the Biology department.  Her continuation at MIT only solidified that fact and now, she had spent the last five years on a Doctorate and soon PD in Molecular Chemistry. Isabelle was, in short, the perfect child.

That perfect child walked through the revolving doors of The Mandarin Oriental and spied her older sister immediately, “Noelle!” she screamed and ran over for a huge hug.  Noelle laughed at her sister’s firm embrace and relished in the familiar scent of her apple shampoo.

“I’ve missed you too Issie.  I’m glad to see you.”

Noelle pulled back to view her sister, bouncing brown curls askew all over her face, and her big green eyes which shined with happiness.  It was a similar set of eyes that Noelle saw approaching them, and she straightened her posture in anticipation.

“Hey, Ma, how was the trip?” Her mother wordlessly shook her hand back and forth in front of her face, rolling her eyes in the process.

“I hate New York City, it’s worse than Boston. Nobody breaks, everyone’s flying down the road like they’re invincible.  Unbelievable, you’d think they forgot about traffic laws! I’m surprised they even stop for red lights in this city.” Her shrill voice pierced the relative calm around them and Noelle pursed her lips before she nodded to the lounge area.

“Well, let’s get you guys something to eat and we can catch up.” Even Noelle could feel the agitation building in her muscles, before her mother spoke again.

“We’re eating in the lobby?  Jesus, don’t these fancy hotels have enough money for a proper restaurant?” Noelle smiled to the waiter as they were seated, hoping that her mother’s comments were not heard by every individual on the Mandarin’s ground floor.

When seated, Noelle braced for the next onslaught that was forthcoming as her mother viewed the menu, “Are you telling me they’re charging almost twenty dollars for sliders?”

Isabelle jumped in first, “Ma, enough! I’m sure the regular restaurant isn’t any better.” She kept her eyes on her mother for a minute longer, waiting for another response.  When there was none, she turned to Noelle.

“So, how are you? I’ve been keeping up with the news from these entertainment websites. You’re here for  _War Horse_  promotions? This is so exciting!”

Noelle nodded, “Yes, there’s a premiere tonight and a gala beforehand, many of the actors and crew are here for interviews and to promote the film.”

“People want to interview a makeup artist?”

Noelle took a long drink of water before answering her mother, “No, but I’m here with the actors. They invited me along to attend the gala. There were many people that worked on that set to bring this picture to life.  Makeup artists are considered a part of that.”

“Speaking of those gorgeous actors,” Isabelle trailed off, as her eyes gazed over Noelle’s shoulder.  She was met with Benedict’s voice before she turned to greet him.

“Hello, hello, Garguilos! What a pleasant surprise to find you here!”  His blue eyes flicked down to Noelle, who firmly held his gaze.

“Yes, my mom and sister surprised me this morning to let me know they were coming in today.  Isn’t that nice?”   She hoped that the look of pure fear in her eyes and the tension in her words translated to her good friend.

He spoke, and let her know she was successful, “Well, how nice you are here for an impromptu visit! Mrs. Garguilo, it’s been awhile since I’ve seen you last. How are you?” Benedict bent down to kiss her on the cheek, a gesture Noelle’s mother appreciated with her half smile.

Nicola’s mashup of a southern Massachusetts Italian peppered her speech, “Well, Benedict, I am as good as can be,  _sai_? I’m here in this awful city and apparently eating expensive appetizers for lunch.”

Benedict nodded his head, having known Nicola for enough years to experience a lifetime of her biting personality.  He turned to Noelle’s younger sister, prompting the girl to jump in her seat.

“Issie, good to see you again! How’s MIT?”

“Great!” she said with a huge smile on her face, “I’m very happy there, teaching three classes this semester.  You know, the other day we watched  _Hawking_  for one of my study groups on how degenerative diseases can impact the body.”

“Oh?” he said while his hand rested on Noelle’s shoulder.  He pressed it just enough to let her know his awareness of her unease in this entire situation.

“Did you tell your classmates you knew the dashing actor who was the star?”

“I did, but many of them weren’t aware of who you were.  A few did see some of _Sherlock_ , so that helped a bit.”

Ben turned to Noelle, “What is it with you Americans? If things don’t get blown up, it’s not worth watching?”

“Sorry, darling, I can’t speak for their taste in British actors in dramatic roles at the moment.” With a long inhale, Benedict slapped his hand on his leg.

“Ah, well, maybe next time I’m here, I’ll stop by and give a talk as to my preparation for the movie. I’m sorry I have to run, but I have a meeting down the street for a new project.  It was so lovely to see you all.  I hope it wont be another few years before we meet again.”

“Me either,” Isabelle said, her eyes remaining on Ben’s lips.  Noelle cleared her throat and her sister straightened her back against her chair. Noelle’s mother nodded to Ben and gave him his hand as he clasped it in both of his.

“I hope you’re doing well, Benedict. I must thank you for always looking after this one.  She’s always needed a strong individual to keep her in line.”

With a forced smile, Ben released her hands and dipped to Noelle’s ear to kiss her cheek.

“We’ll talk later, yes?” Noelle nodded and Benedict waved as he escaped into the cool Manhattan air.

She watched him until her mother spoke again, “Please, Noelle, for all that’s holy, tell me you’re not dating him.  Because if you are, just kill me already.”

Noelle flipped back to her mom’s vision, long curls bouncing off her neck, “Oh, God! No, absolutely not! Ben and I are not, nor will we ever be, a couple.”

“Thank God,” she said, while blessing herself.  Isabelle closed her eyes and then focused on her menu while their mother continued.

“Noelle, you need to stop dating these actors.  _Per amore di Dio,_  you have the absolute worst taste in men. That last one?  A disaster, from start to finish.  We told you from the beginning, that he was  _immondizia,_ but no, you were ‘in love’.  That  _love_ plastered our last name on every tabloid for a couple of months.”  She put down her menu and pointed right in Noelle’s face.

“Actors are no good. They have no stability, no place to call their own.  Even your best friend over there, who is he? They go off and go on these shoots. They can’t understand real life.  Their jobs are fun! They play for the cameras with their fancy clothes and expensive cars.  How could you have a relationship when they’re never the same person? They have no home!”

Nicola turned back to her menu, mumbling under her breath, “Although, that’s similar to you, I guess, since you do the same thing. How are you going to have a marriage or a family, when you’re off and putting eyeshadow on someone?”

“Ma,” Isabelle said, trying to get her attention. Noelle remained frozen in her seat, focused at the beads of sweat from her water glass as they slid and blended into the tablecloth.

“Noelle, these men are different.  They’re going to be looking for a women who can keep up with this posh lifestyle.  Frankly, that is not you.”

“MA!” Isabelle snapped and a few heads turned to the table.

Noelle dragged her eyes from the tablecloth to her mother, who currently found the menu more interesting than anything else in the room.  Out in her periphery, she could see Isabelle shaking her head while looking to Noelle for a sign of forgiveness.  

Noelle knew that deep down, her sister never anticipated this would happen. However, Isabelle never had to deal with this type of criticism.  This type of embarrassment was reserved specifically for Noelle.

“Not to worry, Mom, I promise your name has no chance of being dragged through the papers again. I’ll do my best to stay away from something or  _someone_  that might embarrass you.”  At that moment, the waiter came to take their orders, and Noelle was thankful for the interruption.  Even after she spoke, she forgot what she ordered. She prayed for a quick turnaround and that this visit would blessedly end within the hour.

After their waiter left, her mother grasped Isabelle’s arm, “Did you tell your sister about the fellowship for next year? Noelle, your sister is on track to become full staff at the Institute! We’re beyond thrilled!”

* * *

Noelle had feigned exhaustion for the past hour with minimal success.  She had snapped at Tom when her hair refused to stay in the twist by her neck and again when her heel caught in  the hem of her dress. He remained a gentleman, absorbing her anger while they travelled via cab.  They returned to Lincoln Center  for the public’s first look at Spielberg’s newest masterpiece.

Noelle had been on a red carpet dozens of times in the past.  When Edmund and her were in the height of their romance, he allowed her to be his date and walk the carpet.  Of course, Edmund selected her dress and shoes, allowing her the ability to do her face and hair.  That, he told her, she could manage on her own.

Tonight, she wore a dress loaned to her by the house of Elie Saab.  Working for them the year before had it’s perks, along with sending a few of her friends to help with their last runway show.  The dress was a ready-to-wear vision of black beading and crystals, accentuating her curves as it flowed along the floor behind her.

She paused with Tom as the lights popped around them. A few shouts of Tom’s name, a few directions here and there, and the two were able to leave the photographers behind.  The press anticipated  the well-known actors, Peter Mullan and Emily Watson to arrive, along with their esteemed Director.  Noelle sighed, loud enough for people to hear her.  

“Are you okay?” Tom asked as they walked into the theater.  Although there was a smile on his lips, his eyes reflected his concern at Noelle’s demeanor.  He had not asked about her afternoon, and she was grateful that she did not have to lie to him.  

“Absolutely,” she smiled, even though her body screamed something opposite, “Now it’s time for a drink, yes?”

As they entered the lobby, they headed to the bar. However, one of the P.A.’s ran over to Tom. She gestured to a row of reporters and cameramen.

Tom shrugged, “I’m sorry, I guess they need me for a quick interview.” Noelle waved him off and walked through the sea of attendees for the premiere.  She barely felt the hand on her arm, but recognized the voice.

“Noelle! I’m so glad to see you here!” Jeremy gushed as he pulled Noelle into a warm hug.  She laughed into his chest, rocking back and forth as they remained together.

“I’m so good, Jeremy.  How are you? You look great tonight, by the way!” It was the absolute truth. His hair was styled upward along with his sharp suit and open collar of his suit. He looked quite the gentleman over the young boy he portrayed the film.

He looked her up and down, without any hesitation or shame, and she laughed at his bravado, “So do you! Wow, you look amazing! What have you been working on this past year?”

Noelle found herself enraptured by Jeremy’s charms, telling him about  _Lincoln_  and _Prometheus_ , forgetting her surroundings.  The conversation was light but engaging and Jeremy talked about his role in the newest adaptation of  _Great Expectations._

In fact, Noelle was so deep in the conversation, she was shocked when Jeremy asked her if she wanted to join him for a drink. Noelle stopped and realized she was without her date.  Scanning the room while Jeremy grabbed a glass of champagne for the both of them at the bar, Noelle realized Tom was nowhere to be found.

She stood in a sea of actors, directors, producers, all in their own worlds, walking around her.  Not one paid her mind, the usual interaction and discussions floating around her.  How much would the movie make domestically, internationally? Who would be the rising stars from this movie that had such potential?  Would this film be Spielberg’s anthem to World War One, or be lost in a sea of movies regarding that time?

The noise and discussions proved overwhelming, and the fact remained, her irritation flared beyond her control.   _How could he leave me here? The interviews ended almost ten minutes ago!_ Emotions rushed through her body and the voices, her mother’s included, rose to the surface.  

When Jeremy came back to Noelle with their drinks, he paused before speaking, “Noelle, did something happen?”

Before she could speak, Tom appeared on Noelle’s arm, “Darling, I’m so sorry about that. They had us with these people from MTV and the damn microphone kept going in and out. They had to restart the audio three times.” His eyes roamed upwards to Jeremy and for a second, his eyes went ice cold.

Jeremy never noticed, “Tom! Man it is good to see you too! How awesome is all of this, the entire crew back together again?” He reached out for Tom’s hand and pulled him into a shoulder to shoulder hug.  Tom laughed under his breath, which Noelle knew was more of him brushing off the reunion excitement.

“It is, Jeremy.  Good to see you.  If you’ll excuse us?” Without really waiting for an answer, Tom guided Noelle into the theater.

“God, seriously?” Noelle snapped, “It’s just Jeremy. You can let that petty shit you had with him go anytime now.”

Tom smiled at the people around him as they walked to their seats, “I’m not being _petty_ ,” he hissed in her ear, “I said I’m sorry I got caught up. Do you think I wanted to keep you waiting all this time without me?”

“I don’t know, Tom.  Why don’t you ask all your famous friends how they feel? Although I doubt many of them know what it is like to be left by themselves, like a stray animal,” she snapped at him.  Tom clenched his jaw and his eyes grew firm as they stopped in the middle of the aisle.  With a quick glance at his ticket, he ushered Noelle to their seats.

Noelle folded her hands in her lap and turned from Tom, bracing for his anger.  She was surprised when she was met with kindness.

“Noelle. Look at me, Noelle,” he grabbed one of her hands and her eyes raised to his.  She found only concern in his features, his voice soft and soothing.

“I am sorry. Please don’t think I’ve forgotten, this is our first night in our industry as a couple. All I thought of was getting back to you and walking arm and arm with you, proud to have you as my date.

“There is nothing more important to me than having you here, at my side. It’s what I’ve wanted for over a year. Can’t you see that?”

She wanted to believe him, she wanted more than anything to believe that this was all true.  But so often, pieces of truth are hidden within packs of lies.  _How could he believe all this when it’s still so new?  He has no idea what a relationship looks like after the initial infatuation wears off.  I do._

For now, she forced those intrusive thoughts into her deepest recesses, holding onto the hope that his words were true.  She grasped his hands, entwining their fingers.

“You’re right. I overreacted and I am sorry, Tom. I-I’m glad I’m here with you. More than anything.” She leaned forward and kissed him.  He pulled back a half second before he wholeheartedly returned the gesture.  His hand pressed on the side of her face, fingers dancing in her hair.

“Seriously? Is this what I’m going to be subjected to viewing every time you two are together?” Benedict groaned as he stood next to them in the aisle.  His lips curled in disgust, while his hands rested on his hips.

“Shut it, you’re just jealous,” Tom remarked over his shoulder before he placed another chaste kiss on Noelle’s lips.

“I swear, if I ever get that disgusting with someone, feel free to smack me clean in the head,” he grumbled as he took his seat directly in front of them.  They looked up as the lights dimmed. With a round of lively applause, Stephen Spielberg entered onto the stage to begin the show.  


	17. Chapter 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As the holidays come to London and Noelle attempts to manage her feelings for Tom and her own insecurities, Tom decides to take things into his own hands (with a little help from his friends). However, when a disaster hits the Royal reception, Noelle finds herself in the presence of someone who will cause a huge disruption.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As always, general hijinks occur at crescent-moon-rising.tumblr.com & crescent-moon-writing.tumblr.com! Thanks for all the wonderful feedback!!

“So, I find myself pondering his thoughts at the end of this all.  Is he desperate or content?  Does he find himself searching for meaning as he is on his deathbed?  He has so much resting on his shoulders for so long and I believe he’s lost a part of himself.  He’s proud to see Hal change and he’s hoping, praying, that his son will step up like he did in battle.  Now that he’s about to die and all of these thoughts will fall to Hal, what will become of his legacy? Does that make sense or am I rambling like an old fool?”

As he was met with silence, Jeremy piped up, “Noelle?  Hello, Miss Garguilo, have you escaped into dreamland with your Hal?”  Noelle’s head snapped up to attention, having slipped off into a daydream while the lead of The Hollow Crown relaxed on her couch.  She met Jeremy’s upturned eyebrow and curved lips with an embarrassed grin.

She tried to cover herself, “I’m so sorry, I want to compile these notes before we leave today.” Even Jeremy was unable to believe her words, his chest shaking, as his baritone chuckle rumbled through his words.

“Sure you were focused on those notes,“ he mused, “I declare you were focused on something else. I’d even hazard that it has something to do with the young man I mentioned.” Noelle closed her eyes and turned her head, feeling the heat rush across her cheeks.

She stammered, “I-uh, yes.  I might have been thinking about Hal, well, Tom. It was in a completely professional manner.” Jeremy let out a roar of a laugh and Noelle giggled in her chair.

Her head dropped into her hands, “Fine, it may not have been entirely professional!” There was no way for her to deny it, Tom took over her consciousness and found ways to permeate her thoughts when she was distracted. With the Christmas break approaching, they had only a little time in between shooting Hollow Crown before separating.  Tom went off for his mother’s home early the day before, while Noelle remained on set to finalize things before the production shut down for the holiday.

He nodded towards her suitcase, “I’m surprised you two aren’t spending some of the holiday together.”

Noelle shook her head in dissent, “No, he’s off to his mum’s for the holiday.” She tried to suppress her guilt at Tom’s reaction.  Disappointment plastered across Tom’s face when she declined his offer to join him.  His downturned eyes at her words enhanced his lowered tone.  In all honesty, she was not ready for a major holiday with his mother and at least one of his sisters.  She told him she had plans, which he never followed up with inquiring.

Jeremy poked through her inner monologue again, “It’s unacceptable that you’ll be on your own.  It’s not right to be alone on Christmas.”

“I will be celebrating with my flat’s four walls and a large queue of Netflix.  Gives me plenty of opportunities to catch up on sleep before I’m back in the countryside.  Not that I wont miss you, of course.” She ended her words with a wink and a grin, but neither seemed to satisfy Jeremy. He closed his eyes, pursed his lips, before he crossed over to her.

“Oh, Noelle,” Jeremy gasped, sitting down next to her at the miniature counter centered in the trailer.  His baritone voice shook just a little and Noelle felt another wave of guilt for having to put on airs for him.

“The offer still stands to join us. You can meet Max and Sam and tell them about the industry.  You’ve been in it longer than both of them, give them some pointers over some turkey and goose?”

Noelle laughed, nearly bending in half before she caught her breath, “That’s rich.  You want me to give your sons advice? Do me a favor, call my parents and tell them that. They would get a kick out of hearing that I’m considered responsible enough for such a task.” She wiped a tear from her eye, but Jeremy’s face remained crestfallen.

“You can’t spend the holiday alone, my dear.”

“Oh, but I can, trust me,” she said with a pat on his hand. She saw him beginning to formulate an argument, but she rose from her chair.  Finishing off her tea, she brought it to the sink, readying for his pleas, when the door opened.

“Jeremy, the service is here for you,” the burgeoning chill of the late afternoon hour in the countryside crept into the trailer before the door closed again.  A frost was starting to build, and in a few days, Noelle could envision the area covered in snow.  She was glad that filming would be on pause for the holiday, and she would not be stuck in that weather—just yet.

Before he left, Jeremy lingered in the doorway of Noelle’s trailer, crossing his arms, “I’m not happy you’ll be on your own, my dear. However, I’ve learned that you are stubborn enough to ignore me, but in a graceful manner.“ She dipped her head with a smile, his eyes twinkling at her.

“I wish you a wonderful time, and enjoy the break.  You deserve it. You and everyone else on this team who will make these movies a total success.” He tapped his cup, deciding on his next few words.

“I’ve noticed you’re a little brighter, and I have to believe it’s got something to do with my co-star.  I do hope he makes you happy.”

A deep sigh escaped her chest, “He does. Tom has that ability to bring out the best in everyone around him.” Jeremy nodded before he opened the door to the frigid temperatures.

“Merry Christmas, my dear, and I shall see you in the New Year.” He waved to her as he escaped into the cold. Pausing for a moment, Noelle cleaned up the area in her trailer into some type of order, knowing she would be gone for at least two weeks before she would return to the set.  

Just as she was going to check her messages, her phone chimed:  _Your chariot has arrived, m’lady!_ —Benedict

With a deep breath and a final wrap of her crocheted scarf around her neck, Noelle grabbed her bag and headed into the cold.  She looked up to view the late December skies, already turning dark red and purple, signifying the end of another shortened day.  Her boots crunched with each step, the countryside already retaining the cold and crisp air that would soon drop into even more frigid temperatures.

“Hello, darling girl! Are you ready to head back into society and civilization once more?” Benedict’s lilting voice met her as she made her way to the large parking area, a few trailers and vans remaining for the lingering members of the production.  Noelle gave him a little wave, right before he reached out and grabbed her bag with one arm, the other winding around her back to pull her into an embrace.

Within a few minutes, Ben maneuvered them towards the main roads, “So, how has Shakespeare in the wide open going for you? Not for nothing, I’m not particularly jealous of this production.”

“Thanks,” she deadpanned before turning her head to the flashing lights outside her window, “It’s not been too bad, but this last week seems to have embraced the December cold. We’re keeping ourselves warm with lots of coffee and multiple layers.”

“It’s brutal out here!” he laughed, “I guess it’s good your next film is in Louisiana.  Then you can enjoy the blazing heat of summer in the South.”

Noelle was about to agree with him, when her head snapped to her right, “How did you know that  _12 Years A Slave_  is filming there? It’s only been discussed within the cast and directors.”

A knowing smile crossed Ben’s lips although his eyes remained glued to the road in front of them, “Do you remember while we were in New York, I had to go to a meeting outside of the  _War Horse_  interviews?

“Well, that meeting was with Steve McQueen.  I’m going to be in  _Twelve Years_  as a plantation owner.”  He winced as Noelle screamed, the sound vibrating off the small interior of his sports car.

“You’re kidding me! This is amazing! I-How did this happen- when? Oh my God!” she gasped while she bounced in her chair, eyes gleaming in the twilight that surrounded them as Ben’s car turned onto the highway.

“Your friend Fassbender is the one who recommended me for the role to Steve,” he chuckled under his breath, pausing before he spoke his next words, “We got along really well after I almost punched your ex into a bloody pulp.”  His eyes  flicked over to Noelle, who was nodding to herself, remembering the horrid night at the BFI afterparty.  She was still so embarrassed by what happened: the fight between Ben, Tom and Edmund, along with their friends in attendance.  She never thought Tom would speak to her again, let alone become friends and to lovers once more.

“‘ _Once more unto the breach_ ,’ for us, darling girl,” and Noelle found herself laughing like a child. A memory passed of a similar conversation at Monmouth a few years prior. A very similar conversation where they celebrated over the film that begun her present streak of high caliber positions.

Another film together, another amazing director, and the ideas were already running through her mind. They were to work side by side, and this time, she would make sure that absolutely nothing would ruin it.  Things had changed, neither of them in relationships that could impact filming.  At least, she hoped that would not be the case. Engrossed in her thoughts, she almost missed Ben’s question.

“Speaking of ‘the breach’, you’re not going with Tom to Diana’s for Christmas?”

Like a summer squall, the pressure dropped in the car’s interior within seconds. She felt her jaw clench and the words hissed between her lips, “Did you become a mind-reader? Because I know for a fact I didn’t tell you Tom invited me to his mother’s home.”

His mouth opened and closed as Noelle crossed her arms in front of her chest, “So, out with it, Benedict. What else did Tom tell you?”

“Nothing! Nothing, at all.” Noelle’s growl caused Ben to choke a bit before he spoke again, his eyes remaining focused on the road.

“We met for dinner the other night at Carluccio’s. Did it become a crime for me to meet with my friends?” The mock aggravation in his voice only fueled Noelle even further into her rage.

“Of course not, but when your other friend is discussed, I would think you would at least have the courtesy of refraining from that conversation.”

Ben ran a hand through his hair as he huffed, “Well, not for nothing, he’s concerned.  You guys haven’t spent much time together since New York and he’s wondering if you’ll pull a quick dash once again.”  Noelle felt her body weaken at his words, the sound of air flowing from her lungs as if she was punched in her gut.  

 _He’s concerned about our time together?_  She began to think of the times they had been together—a few nights at the hotel, a few dinners together. She snapped to attention when Benedict’s voice turned firm.

“He’s got precedent to fall back on, darling girl.” Those words broke the hold she had on her emotions.

“I love that the two of you have been chatting about me, and discussing my relationship tendencies! Did you two also discuss how I keep my house? How about my laundry rotation? Even better, let’s get into my underwear!” Noelle felt her body vacillate between nauseousness and spilling into tears. The words were forming in her mouth just as Ben read her mind and pulled to the side of the road.

He slid the car into park; his eyes focused on his fingers while they tapped against the leather covered wheel, “At the risk of you tearing my head off or not speaking to me for the next few weeks, I’m going to be frank with you.” He paused, almost afraid to say the words but he pushed forward.

“You and I have been through too much to mince words with each other. I’m sorry Noelle, but you have to admit he’s right. You tend to turn tail and run when things get overwhelming. The fact you neglected to tell him what happened in New York is a prime example.”

Tears stung at the corners of her eyes as she shook her head, “There’s no reason—“

“Yes, there is a reason.  Thomas is your boyfriend.  He cares about you, Noelle. He’s picked up on something isn’t right.  Give him credit, he’s an Eton boy, you can’t push too much past him.” Without looking, she knew his face had fallen in disappointment when met with silence. Noelle focused on the cars that flew past them on the darkened road.

Benedict continued, “Noelle, I didn’t tell him anything. That’s your decision and I’ll stand by it, I always will. I just think that you should talk to Tom”  

Benedict hesitated before asking her, “You’re not going home for the holiday, are you?” Noelle’s leg started to vibrate, and in his silence she spat towards him.

“No, I’m not! I’m not going home to be discussed as if I’m not sitting three feet from them! They’ll ask about the photos from the premiere, they’ll ask about Tom. Do you know the hell I’d hear when I tell them I’m dating an actor again? I’d rather face their anger about staying in England than go there and be subjected to all their disgust. Again!” Her hand flew to her mouth as she sobbed, the first time she’d cried since New York.

Ben grabbed her free hand and held it for a minute, allowing her to release some of the pent up emotions that were raging inside of her.  With a shuddering breath, she finally caught his eye and his face fell even more.  She wiped the tears off her cheeks and chin, unable to speak without breaking down again.  

“No one would blame you for staying away.  Your mother has a strange and frankly, dysfunctional approach to you. It’s the best for everyone if you remain here. However, I refuse to let you spend it alone.”

“Ben,” she groaned. His hand tightened around hers, as he leaned forward to catch her eyes.

“Absolutely not, in fact, you are now required to attend the party at my parent’s house.  If you do not comply, I’ll be forced to call Wanda and tell her you’ll be by yourself. I doubt I need to go further as to exactly what she would do if she  heard that information.” He trailed off, eyebrow raised. With a groan, she knew.  Ben’s mother was a force no one wanted to face.

“But your mom comes from a place of love, Ben. Mine, well, let’s just agree it’s not that.” Ben vibrated from holding back his laughter, victory in his grasp.

“True, and she does love you. Just think, you can have those minced pies she orders from that bakery across town. Ah, this is great! With you there, it’ll deflect all the questions she’ll have for me. Plus, Tracy’s been asking for you and they can shower you with all their attentions.” As much as Ben was making it sound like torture, she knew it would be lovely.  The Cumberbatch clan always treated her like one of their family, and they were one of the closest and most loving group of people she had the grace to meet.

As he turned the car over, to pull back onto the highway, Noelle grumbled, “Did I ever have a choice?”

“No, not once Wanda Ventham is involved.  You never stood a chance.”

* * *

“Ow.”

She winced towards the spasm in her back, as she gingerly stood from her worn couch.  Noelle had been watching TV for far too long before she realized she was hungry, and that expanse of time did its number on her.  She stretched and cracked before she headed to the empty cabinets, wondering if she hid a container of biscuits somewhere that might be edible.

She neglected to shop before the holiday, and Boxing Day meant reduced hours. She could try and head to the Tesco, but the notion of changing from her sweats forced that decision from her mind.  She searched through the take away menus on her counter, wondering if any of them might still be open.  Pasta was the final alternative for dinner that evening.

Her phone chimed for a message and she flicked open the screen while making a final decision between two Chinese restaurants.  She had to read the words twice before it registered in her head.

 _Happy Boxing Day, care for dinner?_ –Tom

She stopped breathing for a moment.  _How did he know I was home?_  She decided against mulling that statement over too much and she responded:  _Perfect timing, Hiddleston.  Just took a break from a movie marathon, what’s your fancy?_

That got her moving to change from her worn sweats. Unsure what he might suggest, Noelle scampered into her bedroom and grabbed a pair of jeans and a clean shirt from her closet. Her phone chimed once more.

 _I had an idea…_  —Tom

She hustled into a pair of jeans and a different t-shirt, while she pulled her hair into a loose bun.  After splashing a bit of water on her face she paused, thinking there was a knock at her door.

Just as she walked back in her living room the knock echoed again. With a glance through the peephole she spied a set of auburn curls and a blue button down pacing her doorway.  Opening the door to his sheepish grin, Noelle leaned on the frame with a smirk on her face.

“Taking a chance there, eh?”  

Tom dipped his head and smiled at her words. Without looking at her, he held up a large white bag that immediately produced divine scents around them.  

His free hand ran behind his neck, ”I can take a gamble every now and again. I figured, worst-case, these could be leftovers for the next few days.“ Noelle pushed the door open so Tom could duck in. With a purpose, he headed straight for her kitchen.  

She stood at his side, watching him take out the tins from the bag, “How did you know I was home?”

He laughed under his breath, “At the risk of sounding, well, stalker-ish? I may have taken the long way home last night and passed by here.  I saw the lights on and I assumed you remained in London.“ His eyes sparkled as he glanced over at her, a tentative smile on his face.  

"You could have called,” she murmured before grabbing a couple plates from her cabinet.  Checking the selections, she laughed, raising her eyebrows.

“Indian.  Another educated guess?”

“Of course! Well, we live in London, I think it’s the required fare?” She heard Ben’s words about Eton float in her ears as he handed her a plate and headed to her living room. Her flat was not large enough for a table and chairs, so she pulled the coffee table towards the couch.  Tom waved his free hand and plopped down onto the floor.

“We can make it authentic, come on and join me.” Noelle plopped down next to him, as he attempted to cross his long legs underneath his frame.

He pulled apart the Naan bread and handed a piece to her before asking, “So, no trip home?”  

“Nope, decided against it this year.  Too much to do, and I didn’t feel like fighting crowds at Heathrow and Logan. It’s insane during the holidays.”  She focused on her food, moving her fork around in the rice and chicken instead of his gaze.

“I could understand that,” however his voice did not match his words. They were flat, lifeless, and completely opposite of his usual tone. In her heart, she wanted to tell him the situation in New York. That her confession would be met with kind words, a gentle heart.  Part of her believed Tom was that man, but her brain refused to allow those thoughts to permeate through.  _He’ll just see you as damaged goods, and who wants that in their life?_

“No other reason?” Noelle remained silent, trying to search for a better answer than, “I’d just rather be alone,” when she knew he’d see right through it.

Tom dropped his fork and folded his arms to his chest, “Noelle, at the risk of an argument, I need to know something. While I can understand that you didn’t want to meet my family under the circumstances, I find it hard to believe you’d let a holiday go by without visiting your own.

“We’ve talked about our families, and I know your situation with them is not the best.  However, you love for your sisters and your dad, and your mom too in a way. The holidays can be rough, but it’s a time to come together and at least try to enjoy the time.  You were all close once before.”

He looked to his legs before he spoke, voice quieter than before, “I know there’s more to this. I wish you’d open up to me.”

Noelle pulled her legs to her chest, placing her chin on her hand before speaking, “While we were in New York, Isabelle and my mother came for lunch.  They knew I was in town because I texted Issie about the premiere and to watch for the photos online. I never dreamed they would decide to surprise me and take a trip.  My sister swore they wanted to see how I was doing, since I only saw them once in the last year with all my work.”  Tom nodded for her to keep going, his eyes softening with every word.

“My mother—” She paused, trying to come up with the right words for it all.  With a hard swallow she focused on her plate, the chicken and rice growing cold.

“My mother did her usual repertoire of negating my work, my choices in life.  Her focus went from why I was in New York for a premiere as a makeup artist, to my ex-boyfriend.”  She stopped to look over at him, catching his eye twitch ever-so-slightly—a recognition of the night she thought had broken them apart forever.  

“That negativity just continued throughout the lunch. She believes my life is playtime, and anyone in the industry, and probably in general, who is interested in me isn’t real either.”

Noelle closed her eyes as the last of her breath released from her lungs, already noting the ache in her head and her chest. She heard shuffling and  figured he was getting ready to leave when she felt the warmth and pressure of his arm around her shoulder.

“You’ve worked too hard to get to where you are as an artist, and frankly, she’ll never see it.  You made the right decision not to go home, although I’m sure your father was upset that he didn’t see you.”

Noelle’s eyes threatened to fill with tears and it took every ounce within her to fight them back.  Her chest rose and fell rapidly, as her mind raced to form a coherent response to his ability to put it all into perspective.

“You’re right. He was— _he is_ —upset.  He wanted me there, but I couldn’t do it, could not get myself onto a plane.  He loves this holiday, and it was up to me to allow him to keep it happy or be there and chance his favorite day becoming miserable.”

Holding onto her legs, trying not to lean into him. She wanted to appear strong.  It only took the heat of his breath on her ear for her to lose that veneer.

“You did what you needed–self preservation. You protected yourself, like you always do, and you were correct to do so, Noelle.

“Realize you have someone who will be there to listen when you need it.  I care, and see you for who you are, for the woman who has grown in the year I’ve known her.  A woman who has battled and fought to make her name known and pushed ahead to become a well-respected artist in the movie industry.  

“You’re intelligent, and caring, and you love with a tenacity that’s beyond what anyone could imagine. I’m lucky to have you.” Noelle did not breathe, could not speak after his words, unable to believe or accept them.

He placed a kiss on her temple and let his lips linger for a moment.  She scrunched her eyes closed, feeling exhausted and overwhelmed.

“You always know what to say,” she mumbled, trying to move the conversation.  She brushed her fingers on the hem of his shirt that had risen from his jeans.  The bristles of his goatee tickled against her skin and she recognized the heady feeling of being in his arms, with the scent of his cologne permeating the air around them.

Instead of speaking he hummed into her hair, his fingers draping down her back in soothing motions over her shirt.  Looking up to his face, she wondered if he ever lied, and if he did, if she could catch it.

Tom broke the silence between them, “We have the Leicester Square premiere and the royal reception in a little over a week. Will you come with me?”

With a deep inhale she nodded, “Yes, of course I will.” When her lips met his, she forgot about the food, forgot about the conversation and the sadness.  All she knew was how good it felt to be in his arms, and that was what mattered.

* * *

What Noelle did not realize was that the  _War Horse_  premiere in London would be drastically different than New York.  While in America, the movie was another showcase of Stephen Spielberg’s talents, here it was much much more.  It was the description of a war that tore apart nations, crippled countries and was horrifyingly devastating to everyone who lived through it.  Every family affected, every person a part of a time that was dark and cruel.

The pomp and circumstance would begin before the premiere—as Tom, Ben and the cast and crew were invited to meet the Queen and Prince Phillip along with Prince William and his wife, Kate, at a royal reception.  It was cold, and raining—typical for early January, but Noelle refused to cover her new Saab with a coat.  No, she was going to face the cold head on with gusto—and a healthy swig of vodka before she left the house.  

Since the traffic was atrocious at this time of day in conjunction with the premiere, the trio was to meet at the reception and then head over to Leicester Square.  Noelle exited her cab, allowing the dress to fall down to the ground, the sequins sparkling off every angle and the lights of the photographers around her.  

With a small wave, she walked toward the massive entrace where she saw those two familiar Brits by the edge of the flow of people.

“Finally! What took you so long? Don’t you have the makeup and dress thing down to a science by now?”

“Benedict, do me a favor and save the comments for the Queen, eh?”  She ignored her friend temporarily to place a kiss on Tom’s lips. The former already plastered a proud grin on his face at the sight of Noelle coming towards them.  She could not say that she minded his roaming eyes, and how the lighting, along with his auburn hair made them shine even more.

“You look ravishing, darling.”

“I hope you feel that way later,” she winked and held Tom’s hand as they walked to the entrance.  A line of workers checked the revelers before allowing the guests into the royal residences.

“Name?”

“Noelle Garguilo?”

The worker scanned her tablet “I’m not seeing it here.”

“What?” Noelle cried, causing both men to turn back around to her.

“I’m afraid your name isn’t on this list ma'am. Now, please step aside.” Noelle shook her head, her eyes wide.  

“I have an invitation! Right here…” she kept shaking her head, along with her hands, as she searched her purse.

Tom rushed over to her side, “Wait, wait—she’s with me, Thomas Hiddleston.”

As Noelle pulled out her invitation, the worker tapped her tablet, unaffected that Noelle looked as if she’d been doused with cold water, “Your name is here, sir, but hers is not.  She can not enter the palace.”

“But she’s with me, she’s my date!” he stuttered and Benedict flanked Noelle’s opposite side, his pass in hand.

“It does not matter, sir. Unless she is on the list, she is not able to attend.”

“This is outrageous!” Ben yelled, “She was invited with the rest of us who worked on the movie.” A guardsman walked over to the raised voices and spoke briefly to the worker at the line.  He nodded and then turned to Noelle.

“I am sorry, Miss, I can see you have an invitation, but all attendees tonight required vetting and their backgrounds checked before entering the building. The Queen and her immediate family are in attendance, therefore no one can come in without having that security process in place.”

“It was sent! My agent faxed the information weeks ago!’ Noelle cried as Tom placed his hand on her shoulder, squeezing it tight.

“Miss,” the guard said, voice growing firm, “I am sorry, but you can not come into the residence.  I’m afraid you’ll have to step aside.”

Both Benedict and Tom began to protest, getting angrier at the second.  Noelle could see them both getting heated and she grabbed their arms.

“Stop, you’ll get yourself tossed,” she hissed and they stood to the side as more attendees walked through to the reception.  Her voice now shaking, her cheeks pink, not just from the cold and the rain, she made her decision.

“I’ll meet you at Leicester Square, I’ll be there for the performance—“

Both cut her off, “No! We’ll go with you.”

“Don’t you dare!” Noelle snapped, her voice full with a tenacity that silenced them both with one sharp look.

“This is a once in a lifetime opportunity for you both. Go inside, I will be fine. Now!” With those and she turned on her heel to both their protests and back down to the line of cars that were dropping off their passengers.  

Blinking back tears, her breathing staggered, Noelle’s eyes roamed for a taxi hoping one would be free to take her across town.  Her prayer was answered from above, as through the droplets that saturated her hair, a black cab rolled forward and she jumped inside. She dropped her head back onto the leather as she wearily gave the destination.  She found herself unable to pay attention to the buildings and lights as they flashed against the droplets on the window.  

As they finally pulled up to Leicester Square, Noelle realized that they still had a few hours before the event began.  She paid the cab and headed straight for the Theatre’s bar.

She shook off the remaining raindrops that clung to her skin and found the bar.  She hissed,  _Thank God_ , as she saw it was open, one person already being served a drink.  For a second, she thought the tall form looked familiar.  However, she was so frustrated and angry, she could only slam her purse and order a vodka tonic.  She should have known when she heard the lilting voice with the Irish undertone that this night would include his presence.

“Well, well, fancy meeting you here, Miss Garguilo.”  Noelle turned to the massive grin that met her gaze.

“Michael!”


	18. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Noelle makes the auspicious decision to drown her sorrows at the London War Horse premiere with the help of Michael Fassbender. When confronted by Tom, Noelle turns her anger on him.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> My God...it's been a month and a half since I updated this last! I apologize for the delay, but I hope that we will come to the conclusion of this story within a few chapters. Thank you for reading, and please visit my tumblr page (crescent-moon-rising.tumblr.com) for more of Tom & Noelle and all these characters.

There were days in Noelle’s life where she walked into a situation with the outcome in hand.  Times, she knew within the deepest recesses of her soul, that she was about to make a huge mistake.  Not surprisingly, they all had the commonality of alcohol.

The first was when she was fourteen and she accepted an invitation to a kegger a group of seniors threw (also affectionately known as the “beginning of the school year, all-out beerfest”). She ended up completely wasted.  Another senior girl took pity and helped out Noelle, and she promptly thanked her by puking all over her shoes.  That girl then called her older sister.   Her older sister, who happened to be attending the exact same party, as a senior.

Another episode revolved around when Noelle had too much to drink on a night out with Edmund and his actor friends. She may have mentioned that the fact he was cast as the idiot sidekick for the second film in a row. She may have insinuated,  _loudly_ , that his character was closer to truth than fiction.  She may have been locked out of their house and slept on the pool chairs that night. 

Tonight, however, she seemed intent on making those previous experiences look like amateur hour. Keeping Michael quite entertained, she had now taken up residence at the bar of the Odeon Theater. While she drank and complained, and drank some more, the expansive atrium filled with staff and soon cast members of  _War Horse._   While Michael had figured he’d surprise Noelle and Benedict (and Noelle instinctively knew Tom was included), he could never have imagined his night turning out like this.  He amused himself with her increasingly loud volume, language, as well as her anger, as the hours rolled forward.

Only once did the bartender attempt to curtail her flow of alcohol.  Proving unsuccessful, Noelle decided to turn some of her venom on him.

“Listen,” she snapped at the short man with the receding hairline, who also had been enjoying the show, “This rogue Irishman is not my boyfriend.  In fact, he turned me down once. Bet you’re regretting that now, eh Fassy?”

He let out a disgusted groan as she waved him off, “No, no, my actual boyfriend is with The Queen and her perfect grandson and fucking saint of a daughter-in-law.  Yes, he’s quite the British gentlemen along with my best friend. They’re both so posh, so perfect in every damn way.  _They_  were good enough to get into the Castle—“

“Reception” Michael intoned.

“ _Whatever_ —and I, the poor girl from Massachusetts, got rejected from the ball.  I’m not even good enough to play fucking Cinderella.  At least she got to go in, got a dance with her prince!  Stupid godmother, who puts time limits like that on a fucking wish?” With another swig of her vodka tonic, she leaned forward and pointed to herself, almost losing her balance. Michael jumped from his chair to steady her and she promptly ignored him and continued her ranting.

“Nope, not me, I’m not good enough! So, Michael and your fine self get to listen to me whine and complain and—oh, you know something? I think it’s time to make a call.”

Bemused by her actions, and unwilling to stop the trainwreck, Michael leaned against the bar and chuckled while Noelle fished her mobile from her purse.  A crowd had gathered around them, some for a drink, some to watch the brunette as she wavered back and forth.  Michael had been good enough to keep them situated centrally, right in the eyeline of the entrance to the Odeon.

She pressed the buttons to her agent’s cell phone and held it up as the speaker trilled.

_“Noelle?”_

“Jonathan!” she cheered, although the ’n’ sounded more like ‘sin’, “Guess where I am!”

_“I-I am not sure Noelle, are you—?”_

“Well, I’m not at the royal reception that’s for sure! I have been enjoying my very good friend’s company for the past hour, as well as the lovely free alcohol provided here at Leicester Square, and I will keep doing that until I’m dragged inside to watch this bloody movie.”  Michael scrunched his eyes and nose as he turned away, vibrating from holding his laughter inside.

 _“What? But—“_ came out before she cut him off again.

“Guess what they told me! You never sent in my qualifications so I could meet Her Royal fucking Majesty.  Seems the Queen only allows those guests who follow the rules and are good enough to shake her pretty little hand.  Who was in charge of that, Jonathan? Oh wait, let me guess—it was you!”  Laughter echoed around her and she heard his voice turn harsh from this public ridicule.

_“Noelle, I sent all that in a few weeks ago, there has to be a mistake—“_

“No, Jonathan, I believe the mistake was keeping you as an agent.  Toodle—oo, good luck finding another makeup artist for your roster that’s as good as me!” and with a flourish of her hand, she pressed the END button to a rousing cheer all around her.

Already tapping his fingers on the counter and shifting in his feet, Michael’s eyebrow arched as Noelle downed the rest of her drink, “Hey, Garguilo, want to slow yourself down a bit? Even I’ve lost count of how many you’ve had tonight.”

She slowly shook her head in the negative while trying to keep Michael’s gaze, “Nope, like I said, I’m going to drink until I have to set foot into that theater and I have to learn all about horses and war. Although I was on the set, I know what happens.  Spoiler alert: Joey makes it back to his owner!” The crowd burst into another peal of laughter and as a familiar voice rose above it.

“Is that…?” but the voice stopped before saying her name, and with a proud grin Noelle turned with a hand on her hip.

“If it isn’t the dynamic duo, back from meeting the Queen Mum? Have a good time, boys? Tea and crumpets on Royal Doulton china?” She faced both Tom and Ben, as both of their faces recoiled in shock.  Benedict broke through his stunned gasp first.

“Noelle, what’s going on, darling girl?”

“Well, since I had to come here early, it was only fair that I made my own fun, isn’t that right Michael?” The proud grins on both their faces contrasted sharply with the now growing frustration on Tom’s and the disbelief on Benedict’s.

Tom choked out, “Noelle, we could have—“

“No, but you didn’t did you, Tom? It’s not a big deal, after all, it’s all just a little bit of fun, right? So, are you both going to stand there slack jawed or join me and Michael for a drink?” She burst into laughter, and Michael joined in.  Her hand grasped onto his, as she tried to remain steady in her heels.  When Michael’s hand lingered, Tom moved forward and into Noelle’s face.

She chuckled, “No need to get testy—“ but it became her turn to be cut off in her disjointed speech.

“What the hell are you doing? This is nowhere near professional and you look ridiculous.”  His tone was harsh and abrupt; but Noelle rose on her toes to match his eye line.

“Ridiculous is perfect,” she hissed, “Who cares what I look like? I’m background noise in any capacity.”

“You know, Tom,” Michael started, as his grin displayed almost every single one of his teeth, “You should lighten up.” With a jaunty tilt of Michael’s head, Tom’s eyes turned into tiny slits, only his nose flaring in response.

“You know,  _Michael_ ,” he snapped, “You could have cut her off.” The gasp from Noelle was only matched by the high pitched laugh before Michael leaned towards Tom.

“She’s a big girl. She doesn’t need a bodyguard, Hiddleston.”

“That was not what I said, Michael.  However, that’s your style isn’t it? Watch everything burn down while you enjoy your drink?”

Michael smiled back, “I do love a good party.”  Noelle’s hands pushed on both of their chests right before they closed in on assaulting each other.  The look of murder on each face indicated a quick separation and  Ben jumped in to stop the fray.

“Enough!” he snapped, with a hand on Tom’s shoulder, “Both of you. Can’t everyone just lighten up and have a drink?”

Without removing his eyes from Michael, Tom hissed, “Noelle, we’re leaving.”

“Excuse me?” she growled, “I’m not going anywhere.”  Benedict groaned her name, in the way when one knows that the night has taken a right turn from it’s projected path and is headed into a disaster.

Tom finally bent to her ear, his voice above a whisper, “We are leaving before Polly and the rest of the Directors come in here and find you like this. Do you want to ruin your career if that’s what you believe is the only thing you have going for you?”  

Indignation flowing through her veins, she knew deep down in her alcohol addled mind that he was right.  Benedict stood at Tom’s shoulder, his eyes fixed on Noelle’s, silently pleading with her to listen. Slowly the realization struck that she was outnumbered by them and her bravado proceeded to give way to nausea.  Her stomach wavered and defeat set in.  As her hand fumbled for her purse on the bar, Tom went to help her, yet she pushed him aside.

“Fine. Let’s. Go,” she snapped.  Before she moved towards the exits, she leaned into Michael with a hand on her hip.

“Next time, we go someplace a little more fun and less stuffy, agreed?” He raised his glass to her, the sound of Tom scoffing in her ear before she took a few halting steps away from the crowd.  Acutely aware of Tom’s presence, she never acknowledged him, even when they made it to the front of the theater and to the line of black cabs on the street.  They were halfway to Kensington before Tom spoke again.

“You have some nerve, Noelle,” he said, never moving his face away from the raindrop covered glass that reflected the lights as they flew through the streets.  She snapped back in his face, the anger reappearing and laser-focused solely on her boyfriend.

“I have nerve? That’s rich, Tom. Pardon me for wanting to find some enjoyment in a ruined evening.  Being made to leave the residences, like a fool…”

Tom fired back, “We wanted to leave with you! You told us to stay!”

“I didn’t belong there anyway, what was the point!” she screamed, and the driver’s eye turned up towards her outburst.

“That reception was for you—for the actors who were in the movie.  You and Benedict and Jeremy and Spielberg, the ones who are on the posters and getting interviewed.  Who the hell am I?” and her voice broke at the end. She bit her lip, willing with every inch of her body to keep from crying.  

Tom remained silent for the rest of the trip until they made their way across Lancaster Station to Noelle’s flat.  Once she escaped the cab and was hit with the January cold, she could feel her stomach beginning to waver with only seconds to spare.  With a sprint, she ran up and into the building, headed straight for her door.  She flung herself in her tiny bathroom and emptied the contents of her stomach: a few hours of drinking and little else.  

_Isn’t this a sight?  Elie Saab dress, Ferragamo shoes and hunched over a toilet. All in all, this night will go down in history as one of the worst yet._

As she kept pulling for breath, Tom’s presence framed the entrance to her bathroom.  Sweat began to bead on her head as she rested it in her palm.

“Go back to the premiere, Tom. Let me rot in this bathroom in peace, eh?”  She met silence on his end.  She looked up to find his eyes: cold, dark, yet unflinching.  

_Fine.  You won't leave? I’ll make you._

“Come on Tom,” she taunted, “Why are you here? Let’s get this over with, shall we?” Kicking off her shoes, she gained her footing before she gripped onto the counter.

“I think it’s time you left.  Go back to your fancy premiere and your friends and actors and leave me alone.” She pushed past him into the living room, heading straight for the fridge to grab a bottle of water. She was shocked when he sprinted around and bent down to her face.

“No.” One word was all he said. It was a word that was flush with anger, stubbornness and fury. His hands rested on his hips, eyes never leaving her face.

With a roar she lunged forward, “I mean it! I want you to leave, get out of my flat and go. I- I’ll just call Benedict to come and hang out with me. Or-or, even better, I’ll call Michael!  Either one would be happy enough to waste his time here with the reject.”  Her chest rising and falling, the sweat now running from her temple, she knew she was bordering on hysteria as care went out the window.

“Just do it, for godsakes!” Her voice broke, faltering at the end and she turned away from Tom, to hide her embarrassment.

“No.”  

Disbelief prompted a shake of her head, his words continuing to flow from his lips in a calm, almost calculated manner.

“No, Noelle, I wont leave.” Her shoulders sagged as he spoke.

“This is what you do, you push people aside because you’re afraid.  Deep down you are scared of being hurt.  Of course you are; we all are! Do you think after what you did to me in Hampshire, that I wont think twice that you will try and hurt me again? You would rather push me away from being here with you than listening and accepting my support because something horrible has happened.

“No, I’m not leaving. I’m not going to the premiere, I wont attend any parties.  Not this time, I’m afraid you can’t force me out with your usual bag of tricks.”

The tears broke free and streamed down her face while she searched for strength behind her words, “Get out. I mean it, Tom, I don’t want you here. I want you to go back to the premiere, please.”  He moved not one inch from his stance in front of her.

“Please!” she screamed.  Tom shook his head as he held up a finger.

“Give me a good reason.  One good reason to leave, and I will, Noelle.  You want to tell me you hate me?  Go ahead, then make sure you add in the reasons why.  You want to say that I have done something wrong to you? If you believe that I’ve hurt you, you tell me what I did and I’ll leave through that door and we’ll be finished.”

Noelle searched the floor, anything to focus on other than his words, it all felt too real, too much to bear. She felt her head spin as she gripped onto the counter, and Tom took another step towards her.

“When you need someone to be here for you, that person is and should be me—not Benedict and certainly not Michael.

“The fact remains that I’ll do anything for you.  I will, because, I love you.”  Her mouth dropped open as his eyes closed, his chest rising as he inhaled to capacity in an attempt to remain steady.

Noelle could hear her question his words, the “why” registering just above a whisper. She thought for sure she heard him wrong, that those words—the three words he’d never said before—surely did not come out of Tom’s mouth.

Ignoring her, he continued, “So, if you can’t tell me why I should leave, then I’m staying.  I’m staying with you because I love you and where you go, I go.  

“Scream at me, throw things at me, do what you need.”  He slid out of his tuxedo jacket and threw it onto her kitchen counter. With folded arms, as if she’d need to physically remove him from his position, he waited. Her eyes filled with tears once more.  

Tom took a deep inhale as one hand ran through the curls atop his head, “You deserve someone to love you. You deserve it, Noelle, no matter how much those voices in that head of yours tell you otherwise. You are worthy of love.” Even with her eyes fixed directly to his shoes, she could see his hand struggling to move towards hers.  She stifled a sob, unsuccessfully, before he grasped her fingers.  His hands were cold, and she felt herself break at the fact he’d gone through all of this tonight, for her.

“Have at me then,” he whispered, “Tell me to fuck off, and I’m a worthless shit and anything else that wants to come out of your foul mouth. Get it out so you can believe me.”

With her eyes closed, her hand tightened around Tom’s and she felt her body move forward. A silent act of her trust, her faith, she blindly inched closer, hesitating just for a second.  Letting the last vestiges loose, she began to sob into the fabric of his shirt. Although words would not form, she dropped her head onto his chest as his arms brought her into his body.   Her arms followed, her fingers trailing up his sides as she clung to him, vulnerable and scared.  Without hesitation, she sunk onto the ground, the expensive dress fanning around her legs.  It took a split second for Noelle to realize that he sank onto the floor with her, scooping her up into his arms with a sigh.

As each muted sob racked her body, tears dropped onto Tom’s shirt, mingling with the remaining dampness from their walk in the rain.  She fought against the feelings of embarrassment.  The belief that she should be humiliated at breaking down in front of him.  These were things she swore she’d never do again, to never allow herself to be open like this in front of others.

“Still want me to leave?” he quietly asked, his fingers gliding along her back, enveloping her skin like a blanket that she did not want to shed.

Soft and cautious, she replied, “No,” and he nodded to himself, as if agreeing with the statement.  Noelle lost track of the time, as to how long they remained on that cool linoleum floor, Tom’s arms wound around her while her fingers clung to the folds in his button down.  Once the tears stopped, they remained entwined on the floor, a weird rush of calm flowing over her skin.  If it was the alcohol settling into her system or a relief at his presence, she couldn’t care to know at that moment.  Right there, on the floor of her kitchen, she made the decision to allow him to share her pain.  

Eventually, he stretched his long legs and helped Noelle to her feet before guiding her into the bedroom.  Wordlessly Tom helped to remove her dress, tucked her under the sheets and took off his own clothes before joining her.  Her back to his chest, his arms wound firm against her stomach, Noelle succumbed to sleep.

* * *

 

It seemed impossible, but like a symphony hitting it’s crescendo, every muscle sang in sweet pain.  Noelle believed she had been in an auto accident when she first saw the beams of light in her bedroom.  It was when she opened them more, and saw her drapes and duvet when the memories came flooding back.

Scrunching her eyes with a groan, she found her bed empty.   _Maybe Tom left already?_  The unmistakable smell of coffee gave her a little hope he had stayed behind.  Gingerly touching her feet to the floor, she stood with a deep inhale, waiting for the remnants of nausea to leave before she peeked outward.

Noelle found him sipping from one of her mugs and looking out of her flat onto Craven Hill. He was in his tuxedo pants and shirt, although untucked, as one hand rested in the pocket.

“Hey.”

His head turned to her voice and he met her in the kitchen, “Good morning.  How are you feeling?”

“Oh, pretty terrible, I’m not going to lie. How long have you been up?”

“Hour or so, I wanted to make some coffee for us. I had a feeling you would be in desperate need when you woke up.” He handed her a cup with milk already in it, spoon on the side.  She could continue their light banter, but she was nothing if not willing face the aftermath head on.

“Last night was pretty bad, huh?”  She waited; waited for the anger and yelling, the berating and beat down after a night where she acted a complete and utter fool.

He seated himself next to her at the counter, his fingers floating up and down the curve of the handle.  He kept his focus on those fingers before breaking the silence.

“Last night could have been a great deal worse, Noelle.  You want to know the truth?”  Her eyes found his, while his jaw clenched, waiting for her to acknowledge him.  She nodded for him to continue.

“I’m glad I was there because it could have become something entirely out of hand.  You were about to make a fool of yourself in front of your bosses, people who vouched for you to get onto  _Lincoln_.  If I hadn’t shown up when I did, what would have happened? You and Michael drinking to excess before you found yourself either completely hammered, or worse?” Her eyes closed at the remembrance of her conversation with her agent.  Noelle made a mental note to speak with Marcella and Luke Windsor for the names of people they recommended.  

His voice brought her back to the present, “Noelle, I didn’t say everything I did last night out of anger. I meant every word. Could have been in better circumstances…”

“I know, Tom.”  Her hand searched for his and she felt the relief at the touch of his skin, the small act of intimacy, “I needed that though. I needed you to be strong with me, because I that’s my role, I’ve had to be the strong one.  I have always been the strong one.

“People never gave me the time of day, and I never believed I deserved it. I mean, for years, people thought Ben was my friend out of pity.  We always had fun together and made each other laugh. No one saw that, they just saw the son of two successful actors who was going to be huge in movies or theater slumming around with the transplant from the States.  

“It’s those same reasons why I don’t think I deserve you, Tom.” He chuckled and she looked at him with a weary eye.

“Deserve? Who is to say who deserves who in this life? If we care about each other and make each other happy, that’s what’s important.”  She mumbled into her cup and it was his turn to raise his eyebrows.

“Oh, I love you, Tom.  I do, it’s taken me all this time to put it in words, to finally say what I’ve known in my heart for ages. I love you.” It was then that a genuine smile crossed his lips, his free hand reaching for her cheek as she held onto her mug with force.

“If you can remain by me when I dissolve into a hot mess then I know you do love me.  I’m sorry, I’m so sorry…” she trailed off, the sobs racking her body once more. Tom jumped from his chair while shushing her, and wrapped her up in his arms.

She groaned, “I’ve treated you like right shit, haven’t I?” Tom burst into laughter, the force of his shaking making Noelle giggle a little.

“I wouldn’t go that far.”

“I would,” she mumbled as she wiped the tears with the back of her hand.  “You’re a good man, Hiddleston.  And I am sorry, for last night and last year and all the stupid, idiotic things I’ve done.  It’s just—I’ve never had anyone who would stick around for me.”

“You didn’t throw me out last night, and I wouldn’t have left unless you tried pulling me by my collar to the door. I’m not going anywhere. Except right now, I have to head over the flat and get myself together because we have filming tonight.”

 _That’s why he was up so early!_  “Oh God, we have the night shoot tonight!” she moaned, her stomach perking up into a dance.  Tom nodded before he placed a kiss on the top of her head.

“Shall we ride up together? Seems silly to go separate.”

She crossed her arms and looked up at him.  The bristles of his stubble were already blossoming into a little golden glow, along with the subtle highlights in his hair.  His eyes were tired, but happy, and not a fake enthusiasm, either.  It was genuine and directed at Noelle.

“You meant what you said?” she asked.

His tongue peeked from his teeth as he chuckled at her, “I do, Noelle. As insane and all over the place you can be, as one day you’re my inspiration and the next you’re the bane of my existence—I love you.”


	19. Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> As production comes to a close on The Hollow Crown, Tom and Noelle find themselves facing another long separation.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the penultimate chapter of this series, and I hope to have the finale and epilogue up by the end of this week. Thank you to everyone who is reading and enjoying this story.

“What’s the story for today?”

“Well, it’s about three degrees outside, and the windchill is at approximately negative five degrees Centigrade.  Said winds are running at 20 km per hour with ninety-five percent chance of snow in an hour or two. Therefore, I declare we’re in for a real treat this afternoon.”

Noelle’s eyebrow raised at Annie and the two of them chuckled under their breaths.  Both Makeup and Costume directors had suffered through countless days and nights of blistering cold and forceful winds.  In fact, most of the crew and actors were already complaining about how frigid the weather became in such a short amount of time.  While the temperatures worked in Jeremy’s favor, as his character was marching towards his enemies and his eventual death, for the young Hal, it proved disagreeable to his temperament.  

Noelle came prepared with a few takeaways of tea that morning, as she noted that Tom’s skin turned paler as the days wore on. She figured everyone could use a pick up before they headed out to filming.  With less than a week left, they were close—so close—to the end of  _The Hollow Crown._  Four episodes at two hours apiece called for countless hours of shooting, and their director ensured this tetralogy would come across as the highlight of the summer season at the BBC.

Tom seemed quieter than usual when they arrived, and with his request for an early evening the night before, Noelle knew something was not right in the young prince’s mind.  She began her trek from the trailers out to the fields where the makeshift tent city stood to shield the crew from the elements.  

A strong gust of wind flew over the massive field in Rickmansworth and every tent shook and swayed.  Noelle followed along as she held tight to her tray and scarf at the same time.  Entering into the warmer confines, she smiled as she greeted Jeremy.  Decked out in his armor and crown, he was a sight to behold.

“Well my dear, thank you so much for this.  Are you enjoying your watch as we all turn into frozen sticks out in the snow?” His rumbling laugh belied the congestion that was in his chest.  Noelle’s face fell in concern, but Jeremy laughed it off with a wave of his hand.

“It will take more than a mere cold to bring me down Noelle, do not worry yourself at all.  Plus, we’re in luck, Richard’s in a fantastic mood.  It’s supposed to snow in approximately one hour which will make the Battle of Shrewsbery look quite “monochromatic and desolate.” He’s beside himself with glee.” His deep brown eyes opened wide and with a flair of his arms, he shook with anticipation.  Noelle hunched over and laughed.

“Four more days, Jeremy and you can fly off to a  beach somewhere in the Caribbean or the South Pacific, somewhere where none of us can find you.  Where you can evade someone like me who wants to pull out her hair when I find that you’ve smudged something on your cheek.” She set the cups down to pull out her bag and with a drop or two of foundation, began to fix Jeremy’s skin.

“Apologies, my dear, I must have rubbed something while changing into this dreadful armor.  Speaking of, I believe that’s where your beloved is now? Check in with him, he seems a little more sour than as of late today.”

“Oh?” she asked, raising an eyebrow.  She was met with a matching glance on Jeremy before he furthered his thoughts.

“You two should take this break and go on holiday.  See the world, or maybe just a small hut somewhere for a week or two?”

With a long sigh and a smile, Noelle shook her head, “Unfortunately, Tom has about a week at home before he’s off and promoting  _The Avengers._   He’ll be busy straight through March until the end of April. I would love to go along, but I have to prepare for  _Twelve Years A Slave._ Pre-production begins just as Tom is winding up the tour.”

“Ah.” Jeremy sighed before he raised his finger on his free hand, “It’s a roadblock, yes, but you can find ways to make it work.  It’s how I’ve been with Sinead since we were married. We may consistently find ourselves on opposite sides of the world.  Doesn’t mean we’re apart, however. We find a way.”  Finished with her touchup, she grabbed her own tea but before she took a sip, she raised it to him.

“Cheers to you both. To have a lasting relationship in this industry gives me great hope.” Jeremy raised his own before they drank and one of the Director’s assistants came for him to enter the set.

“Go see to him, he may need some support today.” Noelle murmured her assent as she milled between the actors and assistants preparing for the expansive battle scene. She handed a tea each to Alun and David as they prepared for their opposite roles on the battlefield before finding Tom. Sure to Jeremy’s word, he did not appear to be his usual jubilant self.  Rather, he looked quite frustrated and was taking it out on the young man next to him.

Like an overtired and petulant child, Tom shrugged his hand away from his assistant. “I can do this myself.” He grabbed the last of his armaments for his wrists.  When his eyes raised to his girlfriend, only a fraction of his aggravation lessened before he let out a long sigh.

He motioned to Annie, “She had to choose such difficult costumes that we’d be wearing in the dead of winter? Bad enough it’s near freezing out here, all this metal just retains the bloody cold.” With a shrug of her shoulders and a compassionate smile, Noelle handed him his tea.  

As Tom nodded his thanks she murmured, “You are in a battlefield, and she did have to put the main characters in something authentic.  If we were on a soundstage, you’d be sweltering, so you can take your pick as to which would be worse.” His eyes focused on the ground, not on her words.  Noelle took a quick glance around and grabbed his forearm.

“Is everything all right? Even Jeremy noted that you’re off today.”

“I’m fine.  I’m freezing cold, with a cold, and would love to have this week over and done with already.  Because that will mean that  _Hollow Crown_ is finished. I want to go home, have a nice bath and a large pot of tea and not think about Hal, Henry, Shakespeare or fight sequences for a good long while.” Noelle nodded in sympathy to his aggravation. This turned out as an arduous shoot for everyone involved and with the end in sight, it was all they could do but pray it would come quick.

He sniffed a few more times and growled, “Damn runny nose, I can’t stand being sick while filming.” He went to wipe it, and his nose shone redder than Rudolph’s on a clear December.  Noelle sighed and reached into her bag to fix it with her sponge.

With a force, Tom snapped, “It’s fine, it wont show from the red in all my armour.” He turned and strode away from her, towards the group of fifty or so actors lined up for the battle sequence.  Noelle found herself without words, shocked by his brusque behavior.

She decided to brave the cold and remain on the field to watch filming.  While Richard began running back and forth in front of everyone, throwing directions left and right, Noelle could make out Tom sniffing while pacing in his feet.  With the sun behind the clouds, the temperature seemed to drop every minute towards negative numbers.

As the cameras pulled back, she could hear the faint call for action.  Within a few moments, however, they stopped and pulled back in again.  Noelle watched Jeremy and Tom talking on the monitors, as the actors around them huddled close to each other.  After a quick discussion, Richard called for action again—a bit of tension in his voice noted this time.

“CUT!” rang out with force, mere minutes after the scene started.  A murmur went through the crew that stood around her and she thought the wind brought about a new chill in the air.  Noelle tried to discern what happened, and turned to one of the Dolly Grips.

“Can you see what’s happening?”

He pulled his coat together with a huff, “I’d say someone’s screwing up their lines.  No one’s asking for us to come out there and help with the cameras or actors.” She didn’t need to question further as to who could be the offending actor.  Richard threw his hands in the air and the actors around him went silent, although Noelle could only pick out a few of the words that he screamed.  

“Shit,” she murmured to herself.  Without giving it too much thought, she called for Mark to come with her and grabbed her makeup case from one of the tables.  Bundled and huffing, she marched to the front lines like a messenger from the enemy.  

_Oh God, I hope this works._

She would have enjoyed the crunching sound of the snow underneath her boots if it she did not hear all the concerns in her mind she faced at the minefield of anger in front of her.  Her eyes focused on Richard, who had pulled off his headset and was barking at Tom.  

“The lines and spots haven’t changed!”

“I know, Richard, I get it! I am trying here,” Tom groaned as he sniffed again.  As Noelle reached the scene, she cleared her throat before addressing their director.

“Richard?” He turned, eyes laser focused on the younger woman. She caught Jeremy’s gaze for a split second, and it gave her the confidence she needed to push forward.

“What is it Miss Garguilo?”

She held her case tighter while Mark shifted on his feet to her left, “I’m watching on the monitors and I’m getting glare off the principal’s faces from the snow.  I’d rather fix it now then have the editors kill the colors in post-production.”  She waited to see if he’d buy her excuses.  Noelle silently prayed her thanks, when with a harsh sigh, he relented.

“Five minutes and not a second longer! I want this in before the snow starts!”  Noelle directed Mark to Jeremy and she headed to Tom. She braced for his anger, but it turned inward.

“Godamnit, I should know all of this. I know these lines and spots by heart,” he murmured while she pulled out her bottle and pad.  Her voice was hushed but ran at rapid fire, with the knowledge that they were under a time constraint.

“Okay, what is going on? You’re missing lines and snapping at your director.  Don’t give me the bullshit that you’re sick, it’s more than that. Stop lying to me and yourself and tell me what’s going on. We have four minutes.” She turned just enough to the left, as his eyes flicked over to find hers.  He shook his head, an air of disbelief floating around him, before he whispered back to her.

“I received news from a friend today, and it’s causing us to have a row.  He—he’s a good friend and I’m a bit taken back by it.” Standing upright to check his eyes and jawline, she bent down to “inspect” him further.

“There’s nothing you can do about it now and in this field, correct?” He nodded along before she moved to his other side continue her work.

“It’s going to be hard, but you have to put it aside right now.  You’re not well and it’s not helping your focus.  Later, when you get back to the hotel, we’ll figure this out, okay?”  At the word, “ _we_ ”, Tom’s head snapped to Noelle’s. They remained silent while Tom’s eyes searched Noelle’s.  He looked as if he wanted to speak, running his tongue between his lips before a voice came through.

“If His Highness is ready, we are as well!”  Noelle’s eyebrow raised at Richard’s sarcasm and Tom dug his heel into the dirt. Before he left, she grabbed his wrist to turn him back to her.

“I’ll be by the gates, Tom,” she maneuvered her fingers under his gloves to his skin, cold even with the layers over them.  His lips wavered, as though he wanted to bend down and place both of those cold hands on her warm cheeks to kiss her until neither of them could breathe.  If there was not a major production going on around them, she knew that could have been a distinct possibility.

Instead, she received a curt nod and a small wink before he headed off to the cameras.  Noting the first flakes falling from the skies, Noelle closed up her case while Mark placed his pots back in their containers.

“I’ll be honest, I didn't see a glare on the monitors,” he said while Noelle focused on counting her brushes.

“You didn’t? Came off that hill over there.  Maybe I’m over judging it, and that’s not so bad.  Never hurts to be overcautious, you know?” her voice raised just enough, but Mark did not seem to care.  He was more interested in heading back to the tents and one of the space heaters inside.

* * *

 

Noelle read over the day notes from the Directors before adding her own information, when she heard the knock at her door. Scrambling from the bed, she raced to find Tom, in his favorite gray high necked sweater and training pants, along with a big scarf and two cups in his hands.

“I do not believe I properly thanked you for the tea earlier, and for you saving me from utter disaster today,” he smiled as she pulled him inside.

He chuckled, “What’s with the secrecy, Garguilo? Or are you that eager to get me in your room?” She bumped her hip into his with a smirk and guided him to her bed.

“Calm it Hiddleston, you’re an invalid.  Or have you rested up enough so you’re not feverish anymore?” She raised a hand to his forehead and was glad to find it cool and not as damp as earlier.  He grabbed it and kissed her knuckles before they sat on the multicolored, multi flowered duvet.

“Nothing a little medicine and an extended hot shower couldn’t fix.  I wish you could have joined me,” he murmured into her ear as she closed her laptop.

Kissing his nose she shook her head, “Nope, then you would have gotten no rest and that would be detrimental for the expansive production we’re on at the moment.” She grinned against his mouth but moved just as he went to close the distance.

“Okay, let’s go. Enough of you trying to distract me with your charming ways. What happened today?” She folded her legs under her before placing her paper cup between them.  Tom ran his hand through his curls, as if they were an annoyance, before he focused on the ceiling.

“My good mate, Jonathan is getting married in two months.  I’m so happy for him, for them.  I have met his fiancee and they’re both lovely people. I’ve known Jonathan since I attended Eton, he’s been there with me through everything.  He called today to say they’re just taking the plunge and getting hitched up in the Isle of Wight.

“It’s all great, except for one thing, I’m going to be in the States on the day of his wedding.  I’m between Los Angeles and New York City for the premieres and there is no way I can fly back to England and make it in time.” He stopped, his Adam’s apple bobbing from attempting to catch his breath.

“He doesn’t understand why I can’t tell the movie studio that I will not attend one of the premieres.  He feels I’m ditching him for a “star lifestyle” and this is just the beginning of me getting a big head and forgetting my friends.”  Noelle reached out and placed a hand on his leg, recognizing the hurt in his eyes—having seen it before, firsthand.

“I don’t bail on people, that’s not me.”

“Of course it’s not, and you’re not bailing on him, Tom.  This is your job, your profession.  While it’s different from what most other people believe, there are expectations that have to be met.  You’re accountable for what you are obligated to attend.” Shifting herself on the bed, she pulled closer to his downturned eyes.

With a deep inhale she murmured, “This business makes it hard to have people to care for on the outside.  Everyone sees glitz and glamour, that it’s all about the clothes and patting each other on the back for making millions.  Maybe they’re right, sometimes that is what happens.  However, what most do not and cannot see is that it is hard work.  

“We have to make tough choices all the time.  While your friend can’t understand that, you know it.  You know that Marvel expects you there, and it’s part of the job—promotion.  This is how we introduce our work.  How we tell our families and loved ones, ‘Hey, you know those 2, 3, 6 months I was gone? This is what it was all about.’ Let me also say this. What you, personally, have done is impeccable.” That caught his attentions.

Her hands began to fly and she had to be careful not to spill from the plastic roof of her cup, “Everyone is saying you’re the breakout from this film! You’re the lead villain, the main component to bring these superheroes together.  That in itself, is a feat and everyone,  _everyone,_ reported that you bring this movie to life.

“Your friend? He’s not going to understand any of this.  His wedding will be the happiest and most wonderful day of his life.  He can’t fathom that you wouldn’t drop everything and go stand beside him on that day. That instead, standing on a red carpet, talking about a role is silly in comparison.  But it’s not.”  She reached out her hand and held his cheek as her own forehead rested against his.

“He may never understand, Tom.  That is the movie industry.  We lose people that we’ve had beforehand because for whatever reason—big or small—they can not see what we do on a daily basis.  That does not mean you’re a bad person, and it doesn’t mean he’s a bad person either.  It just means you may be at an impasse.  It may change, though.  Maybe someday he’ll turn around and realize what you’ve done and why.  Not now though, so don’t expect it.”

His eyes closed as he leaned his cheek adjacent her palm, “I still feel like an arse.”

“You will, for a long time,” she moved backward and looked straight into those crystal blue eyes that always seemed to take her breath away. “However, I can assure you that you are not an arse in any capacity.  You’re human, even when you do everything right, sometimes you fail.  However, I think you’re mildly attractive and sort of funny, but that’s my opinion and who wants that?”  Before she could pull away, Tom grabbed the tea from her hand and placed it on the side table before he tackled her down to the duvet.  His long fingers were perfect for tickling her sides and stomach and he did so with such gusto that Noelle found herself unable to breathe while kicking the air.

“Enough! I yield, I yield good sir!” she screamed before he stopped so she could get just enough air so he could take it away again with a kiss.  Instinctively, her arm and leg wound around his body before a sigh passed her lips with a slow, yet longing release.  His eyes twinkled before his body rested against hers.

“Thank you.  Thank you for telling me all of this.  I needed to hear that, to have your support.” She nodded with a smile, before his lips curled into a mischievous grin.

“I like hearing those words, ‘I yield’. Hows about you say them again and again, but this time, with your clothes  _off_?”

* * *

 

As Noelle parked the car into the small lot, she looked around in the falling darkness for Tom.  As their last night on set would turn into the last day, he asked her to meet him at the fields overlooking the expansive snow-covered countryside that they called home for a month and a half.  She was happy to say goodbye to it all, with less than twenty-four hours till she packed her bags and returned to London.  

As the door of the car next to her opened, she watched the tall frame unfold out of the Fiat before Tom walked around to open her door.

“Is there a reason you asked me to meet you here in the dead of winter when we should be preparing our escape from this place?” He wrapped her scarf around her neck once more before his arms reached outward to hold her close to his body.

“Yes. Give me some credit, will you? There is a method to the madness.” He led them up one of the tree lined hills just as the skies lost the last pinks and purples before fading to black. Noelle held tight to his waist, the newest snowfall reaching up and over their ankles.  

Once at the crest of the hill, Noelle could make out a large tent in the distance, lights shining within the rustling fabric. Pausing before they moved forward, she turned to Tom, who was already bouncing in his heels from the blowing snow and wind.

“Is that for us?”

“It’s for you, Noelle.  Let’s get inside and out of the cold and I’ll explain?” with a raise of his eyebrows, she relented and they hiked the few hundred meters to the bright orange and yellow encampment.  It was large enough to stand in, almost a miniature version of a tent for a wedding.  Holding open one of the flaps, Noelle walked inside and within seconds found herself in stunned silence.

Inside was a table, with candles and little lights from the ceiling.  A small battery powered heater ran in the corner while insulated bags rested on the chairs.  The most impressive part was the clear plastic ceiling, which gave way to the gorgeous stars that were already making their appearance in the night sky.  She was so stunned, it was only until Tom grabbed her hand that she came back to Earth.

“Do you realize that we’ve not had a proper date in months? I’m not counting the premiere, we can let that fall by the wayside.  We’ve both been so wrapped up in this production, we’ve not had a date.  A night for you and me, and I wanted to do this for us.”

Her mouth ran dry at being open for so long, until she realized she should probably close it for fear of looking dense.  When her eyes met his, found a satisfied smirk, which meant he received the reaction he hoped.

“We’ve been to dinner…Carluccios…”

“That was before Christmas, darling.  It’s almost March.” He walked around her and pulled out a bottle of champagne and instantly it went off with a loud POP.  Noelle’s eyes kept trailing up and out of the clear flat, to watch the sky turn into millions of twinkling diamonds over her head.  

The wind shook the tent again, yet it was becoming quite comfortable with the small heater.  Biting her lip while accepting the glass of champagne that he offered, Noelle wound her arm around his waist before she spoke.

“There’s more to this than just a dinner.”

“So perceptive you are, Miss Garguilo, it’s one of the features I truly love about you.” He led her to the small table and chairs and sat her on his lap.  She couldn’t help but lean against him, relishing in how her head fit in the crook of his neck, the way his hands wrapped around her body just so—as if they were two pieces of a puzzle coming together.

“First, I wanted to thank you.  Without you, this would have been an intense and difficult production.  I know how lucky I was to have someone who I love quite madly at my side for all these weeks.” Noelle scoffed but he sat up to face her.

“I mean it! Do you know what a relief it was to have you on set, to return to at night, instead of a cold and empty hotel room? Someone to talk to, and not talk to after a long day? I can’t thank you enough.  So, to show you how much I love you, tonight is just a start.”  

With a sigh he continued, “I have the press tour in a week.  I’ll be all over the world for it, and it’s going to be insane.  Then when I’m in London, you’re in Los Angeles…”

“But” she jumped in, “I made sure that I will be in L.A. when you’re there. That way we have at least one point in all of this where we can converge.”  
  
“Is that what they’re calling it these days? That’s an interesting term… _converge_.” She smacked him in the arm before he silenced her with a kiss.

When her brain functions returned she sighed, “Yes, we’ll have Los Angeles, and then maybe a little time before I leave for Louisiana.” She knew her smile gave away some of the sadness in her heart at another long separation.  They would have the summer though:  _The Hollow Crown_ premiere and Wimbledon and whatever they could enjoy together in the midst of their crazy lives.  They would find a way, she was sure of it.

_It all seems so far away._

His fingers traced the outlines of her face, running across her cheekbone and down her jawline.  Toms eyes went back and forth to her neck and lips, as if he could not decide on what would be his first choice to enjoy.  He settled on the latter before he breathed against her soft skin.

“So, tonight, before we head back into the insanity of our lives, let’s enjoy this—enjoy our time together and this beautiful evening. Under the tent, of course,” she giggled in response, already feeling the effects of the bubbles on an empty stomach.

“Let’s forget about what’s to come and focus on tonight.  Agreed?”

“Agreed,” she said before raising her glass, “To tonight?”

“Tonight, my darling,” he whispered before taking a sip and kissing her once more.


	20. Chapter 20

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The final chapter places Noelle in Los Angeles for the premiere of The Avengers with Tom. When faced with his intense new fame and stardom, she is met with one of her greatest fears, while on the arm of the man she loves with all her heart.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is the end of this series with the Epilogue to follow. Thank you to everyone who read and followed along. After this story, their adventures continue in Awards Season and The Way We Were (series to be published soon).

As Noelle walked through the doors to the Terrace at Chateau Marmont, she felt as if she was transported back in time.  When men wore Brown Derby hats and women donned feathers in their hair and smoked cigarettes from long sticks.  A fancier, more decadent time and there was no other hotel in Beverly Hills that catered to that decadence than the Marmont.

Her eyes trailed over the large palm trees and tall silver lanterns that surrounded the restaurant as the roofs of the storied bungalows peaked in the distance.  She wondered who had taken residency here as of late, and if she might catch a celeb in their robe.  Maybe a hungover actor having a late brunch or early dinner, beginning, of course with some hair of the dog.  

Even with her large sunglasses, she could spy the bright blonde hair of her best friend, but it was the click of her shoes that drew the attention. Marcella looked up from her menu and waved one long and thin arm into the air before Noelle reached her.

“Honey, you look fabulous!” Marcella gushed as she embraced the shorter and curvier Noelle.

“Thank you,” Noelle blushed, “You, as always, look amazing ‘Cell. Los Angeles just agrees with you.”

“Yes, it does, but remember I’ve dealt with the wrath of this city for over a decade.  It hasn’t eaten me yet, and I’ll be damnned if I’ll let it try now.” She burst into laughter as Noelle could only shake her head as she sat in the wrought iron chairs.  Each table had an expansive umbrella shading the occupants, but no one was without their protective shades.

After ordering some drinks and easy chatter, Marcella dove right in, “Well, are we happy with our new agent after you fired the last one while drunk with Fassbender?” Noelle groaned before Marcella rolled her eyes.

“Seriously, Noelle? I had to fight to get you on the rolls with Hamilton Hodell. What in the world were you thinking?”

She hid behind her menu, already feeling the blush creep up her cheeks before responding, “I was drowning my sorrows.  Jonathan screwed up, there was no way I would have stayed with him after that.”

“Right, but you didn’t have to call him while drunk and in the middle of the Odeon to make fun of him. Anyways, it’s done and in the past, and please tell me that you’ll act like the good Makeup Director I sold to them while under HH’s management.”

“Yes ma’am.” Noelle muttered before Marcella flicked some of her ice water across the table. Noelle dipped into her own and they were on the brink of a war when an older couple were seated near them.  Both women held up their hands in a truce as to remain in the good graces of the establishment.  

After their giggles died down, Marcella inhaled before asking, “Speaking of HH and their clients, how are things with you and Mr. Hiddleston?”

Noelle twisted her hands in her lap, “I have to say, it’s been lovely.  Even with this insane  _Avengers_  schedule. He’s been all over the world and on different time zones, but we’ve kept touch with phone calls and Skype.”

“As long as you’re satisfied when you hit the end button, honey, you’re in it good.”

“Marcella!” Noelle shrieked before lowering her voice, “Have you no shame?”

Marcella folded her perfectly manicured hands on the table while her chin dipped to her chest, “Noelle, Tom’s voice is like sex on velvet sheets scented with vanilla.  No one could blame you for having any type of audio or visual relations with him while you two are apart.  Which reminds me, exactly how good is he in real life?”

Noelle nearly grabbed the waiter in thanks when he walked over for their orders.  She knew she only had little time to compose herself before the questioning began again, so she lingered over the small plates before deciding over the charcuterie board along with Marcella’s cheese plate.

Taking a sip of her chardonnay, Marcella leaned back to gain just a fraction of the sun’s rays, “Come on, Noelle, I have never known you to keep your mouth closed when it came to the good stuff.  Time to spill!”

“Yes, I may have been forthcoming in the past, but that was because I had nothing to say! How many times can you reiterate, ‘Edmund couldn’t get it up last night without two Viagra’?” Both women burst into laughter again, garnering a stern look from the adjacent couple.

Marcella draped her fingers on her tanned chest, “Oh honey, you are doing well.  I’ve never seen you be able to handle discussing Chappers like this without becoming upset.  Tom has done a world of good for you.”

Noelle nodded, “Yes, he has been amazing.” Her leg bounced into the table before she sighed, "You know how I hate premieres.  This is beyond anything I’ve ever attended, and Luke said every major market is covering the red carpet. It’s a bit much. Thankfully, I wont be in the press line for long.”

Waving her hand lazily through the air, Marcella pressed forward, “Who are you wearing?”

"Prada."

"Good.  What color?"

"Red"

"You know Tom’s color?"

"Silver"

“Excellent! You’ll both stand out like shining stars.” She leaned across to grab Noelle’s hand,   “Don’t worry so much, it’s going to be great! If you do get nervous, I’m sure there will be an area serving drinks.  A drink, Noelle, singular.” The emphasis on her final word did not pass without notice .

Noelle squeezed Marcella’s hand, thankful for everything she’d done for her as her longest friend since she started working, “This is crazy.  World premiere tomorrow night with my boyfriend who’s the main villain.  I hate these things, ‘Cell.”

Marcella nodded, “It’s different now.  You’re with someone who cares about you and wants you to be happy. I think that the universe always finds a way and you two found each other again after over a year apart.  It’s fate, and you’ll recognize it soon enough.”

With an arch of her eyebrow Noelle smirked, “You’re so zen, Marcella.  Is it the Vitamin D? The laid back atmosphere here on the West Coast? Truly, what is your secret?”

“The flowing alcohol and proliferous weed.” Their cackling drew the attention of their neighbors and Noelle mouthed an apology just as their lunch arrived.

Just before Marcella placed a wedge of cheese in her mouth, she dropped her voice, “Come on, Noelle! Spill it! Scale of one to ten with ten being the best you’ve ever had in your life, how does the British Invasion rate?”

After a beat, Noelle replied, “Twenty.”

* * *

 

“Hello, everybody.  I’m Tom Hiddleston and…um…I’m just gonna get in my car to go to the premiere of The Avengers, which you will be able to see on May the fourth. I can’t wait for you to see it…and we’ll be on the red carpet in an hour…and by the way… _I have an army_!”

Noelle closed the video before she dissolved into laughter, “Oh God! That is so camp! Your fans will eat this up!” She jumped into the backseat beside him as the driver pulled away from their hotel and towards the El Capitan Theater.  As nervous excitement flowed through her veins, Tom’s over-excitement poured forth like a tapped keg.

“This is going to be incredible, I mean, we had this already in London and Moscow and now Los Angeles. We’re going to the El Capitan and we’re going to be in front of thousands of people and hundreds of reporters! Everyone will be here tonight!” Noelle looked up from her phone, just as she uploaded the video to YouTube and sat back.

“How much coffee have you had today?”

“One!” he yelled, just as the car turned onto the freeway and they began to fly towards the twinkling skyscrapers in the distance. He reached across with little difficulty and wrapped Noelle in his arms before his mouth pressed against hers.  Within seconds, she felt heady from his onslaught and had to hold herself back from undoing the buttons on his suit.

“This…reminds me…of the day you filmed the St. Crispin’s Day speech,” she gasped when he finally let her breathe.  “You were so wild with pent up energy that night. I think that was four times for us?”

“Five, you’re forgetting the shower when we woke up.” Noelle nodded with a blank stare as he continued to caress her skin with his fingers, his lips remaining on her temple and cheeks before she pushed him away, with force.

She responded to his groan, “We’ll arrive looking like lovesick teenagers at the theater! Let me at least look presentable before I run inside and you maul me at our seats.” She adjusted the straps of her bra and pulled out her compact before he spoke.

“You wont stay with me on the carpet?”

Noelle continued to focus on her nose in the mirror, “No, of course not.  You do the line and the photos and interviews while I’ll be inside.  Don’t worry, I think all the bartenders know my face and have been told not to serve me tonight.” She chuckled to herself before he quieted, which proved unnatural after his energy for the past hour.

“What is it?”

Tom focused on the PCH and let out a long sigh, “I would like you to stay with me.  That’s the reason we’re going together.”

“Luke doesn’t want me to walk with you, he said you need to take photos alone. It’s better for your image." She shook her head, the long curls skimming her shoulders, "I understand, I did it all the time…” but he cut her off with a slap of his hand on the fine leather.

“No, I’m not him, Noelle.  I never will be! I’m sorry, but I don’t believe Luke is right on this one.”

“He’s your P.A., Tom.  That’s his job.”

“It may be his job, Noelle,” her name tinged with aggravation, “But Luke is not always right.  He may believe that I am better off walking alone, but it’s not what I want tonight.  I want you there.”

Noelle shook her head, “I’m not going up against your press agent and pissing him off.  You’re right, this is a huge night and opportunity for you and I’m not going to be the one who will blow it up because you want me for arm candy.”

“That’s right.  Arm candy, you’re so perceptive,” he snapped and crossed his legs away from Noelle.  She mimicked his stance as they continued the journey, finally ending in the line of limousines and SUV’s headed to the theater. When the car was third in line to enter the fray, Tom's eyes scanned the lines of people along with the flashing lights in the distance.

She, on the other hand, felt her nerves bubbling in her stomach, the hair on her arms dancing as each car would unload to a roar of cheers and applause.  She watched as hundreds of flashes would explode simultaneously from the rafters to the floor.  Noelle wished she had a bottle of water, wine, something, for her mouth and throat as she felt it tighten up. There were close to a thousand people at the entrance alone.  

When the car pulled to the beginning of the carpet, Tom turned and mumbled, “You ready?”

“No,” she said and his eyes flew to her in shock, “Let's get out and someone can bring me in the theater.” With a slight nod, Tom hoped out first as an attendant met Noelle.  She straightened her dress to keep her modesty in check, and exited to the balmy night air.

She jumped in her heels as the screams exploded for Tom.  Graciously, he waved while he buttoned his jacket, fans lined up five deep and completely covering multiple sections of grandstands on each side of the carpet. Noelle barely felt the attendants arm as he moved her around the car and to Tom’s side.  She looked up, practically blinded by the staggering amount of lights, both stationary and flashing all around them.  When she met his, for a singular moment, time went still.  

It was his eyes, those same blue eyes she remembered from years prior, in a warm field in Hampshire.  The ones that greeted her every morning, dancing off the sunlight that bathed over lush greens and yellows all around them.  How at times she felt mesmerized by how blue they were, even after the long nights that preceded their days.

Those were the eyes that held her gaze in a piazza in Rome, that twinkled at her in New York and that found her in another field, this time in Ricksmansworth. They had changed over all that time, from funny to kind to hurt and then with forgiveness. These were the eyes that said they loved her when all she wanted was to steep in her pain.  After all that time, she may have faltered, and he may have too—but never without the love they found in each other.  She realized that, standing in the middle of what could only be described as a frenzy of screaming and lights and heat.

Grasping his hand in hers, their fingers lacing together as if that was how they should always be, she squeezed his hand with a smile.  Any lasting anger he had at her disappeared in an instant as he squeezed back—an enthusiastic and excited grin flashing across his lips.

One of the press handlers walked up to Tom, “Evening, Mr. Hiddleston. When you’re ready.”

“It’s Mr. Hiddleston and his girlfriend, Noelle Garguilo.” He squeezed her hand again, prompting Noelle to nod her head in agreement.

“You got it, guys.  The carpet is yours right now.”

Guiding her forward, the flashes turned into fireworks, but this time Noelle was prepared for them.  She focused on set points, listening to a few of the directions of,  _“Left!, Right!, Over here, please!”_ It was when both Tom’s and her name began to chorus in tandem that she looked back up to him.

“You and me, Noelle,” he murmured, “you are what makes my world rotate and revolve.” With a cheeky wink he leaned down and kissed her lips, prompting the crowds around them to hit a fevered pitch. Noelle found herself dizzy, and her hand gripped into his, trying desperately to remain upright under it all.

Sensing her imbalance, he wrapped his arm around her waist and they paused for a few more photos before Tom guided them to the line of reporters.  Ahead of them, Noelle could see some of his costars, Mark Ruffalo and his wife along with Clark Gregg and Cobie Smulders at the interview line.  She became lost in all the voices chiming around her, rapid fire questions hurled at every actor and actress.

 _“How was it working with all these big names?”, “Did you make anyone actually kneel on set?”, “Do you all get along this well outside of filming?”, “Who’s the craziest on set?”_   Noelle watched as Tom answered every single question with a calm, yet excited grace, always polite and thankful with every news outlet-big or small.  

As he was interviewed for  _Jimmy Kimmel Live!_ ,  she moved off to the side, especially since there were Hulk hands and Tequila involved in the interview. She laughed at Tom’s pretend fighting, just as a voice cleared at her shoulder. Noelle turned around to find another set of baby blues, attached to another tall and handsome gentleman.

“So, you’re the one and only Noelle, huh?”

Her mouth dropped open, “Oh God, you’re Chris Evans!”

“This is entirely true,” he said with a twinkle in his eye that Noelle could tell he perfected with years of experience. "I had to come over and meet the woman who’s got this guy whipped like a stable boy.” Noelle burst into laughter and he chuckled in response.

“Seriously!” he continued with his hands shaking in front of him, “He’s normally the most eloquent guy on the block, but once you get a few drinks in him, he will not stop talking about you.  But then again, I heard a little something in your ‘gawd’, so I’m thinking Tom's found that it has to do with some of that Massachusetts charm in ya.” Noelle grabbed his forearm before she fell over.

“Stop it! I’m from New Bedford, born and raised!”

“Ah, an Oceanside girl? Yah-huh, I’m a sud from Sudsbury!” They soon dove into their favorite haunts in Boston, best home-brews and a distinct love for the Sox.  Noelle lost track of time before an arm looped over her shoulders and pressed her close.

“How did I know you two would find each other?” Tom grinned at them.

Chris latched onto Tom’s shoulder and laughed, “Of course! We have to stick together here against all you classically trained folk. I can see what was keeping you up those nights, Thomas.” The mischievous grin on Chris’ face, along with his teasing voice, prompted Noelle’s mouth to drop open in shock.  Even with all the bright lights around them, she could catch the blush on his cheeks spreading to the tips of his ears.

“Ah,” he stammered while his gaze flew all over the place, “I had my moments.  It’s been a long press tour, I couldn’t help it!”

Chris shook his head at the two of them, just as a huge roar came up from the crowd.  Chris and Tom groaned, “Downey.” Chris waved the two of them off while he went to finish his interviews while Noelle and Tom watched the controlled chaos of the red carpet.

After the flashes and screaming died down, Tom held out his arm, “I’m believe it’s time. Are you ready to go watch a movie?” With no hesitation, and linking her arm in his, they strode into the theater.

* * *

 

“So, what did you think? Really?”

Her shoes crashed against the wall as she tossed them into their hotel room’s walls, happy to be rid of the four inch heels that closed some their height gap, “Oh, I found your performance incredibly convincing.”

“Convincing?” Tom purred as his jacket and then his tie fell to the floor, “I must hear more of this review…please elaborate Miss Garguilo.” They both chuckled as she turned to pull the zipper of her dress while backing slowly into their room.

“Oh, the character of Loki truly became the star of this film.  You see, Loki wanted world domination, and to find his rightful throne here on Earth.  Now, as one that lives on said planet, I find myself entirely captivated by those goals.” Her dress slid onto the floor, revealing a pair of lace underwear and a matching lace and satin bra.

Tom’s voice stumbled when he had to swallow before speaking, “I-is that so? What is so, um, captivating?”  His eyes trailed up her legs, over her curves and to her lips when she finally sat on their bed, her hands sliding back against the sheets.

Licking her lips, her eyebrow raised, “Well,” she said as her hair fell back over her shoulder, “I could find myself doing things that Loki would command of me, as his subjugated prisoner, without any question.” Her one leg rose up in the air to cross over the opposite as she bounced her foot in anticipation.

“Oh,” was the only word that fell from Tom’s lips while watching his girlfriend slide her leg up and down, beckoning him to join her.  After a few beats of silence, Noelle could only smile with a raise of her eyebrow.

“Why don’t you put that commanding performance to the test?” One of her hands went  to remove her bra before Tom’s hand went up.

“No. Not yet.”

Noelle beamed at the resurgence of his authority and sat up, her breath hitched at Tom’s darkening eyes in the dimmed lights of their room. His head tilted as he clenched his jaw.

“Come here,” he ordered, the power rising in his words and open legged stance.  Noelle scampered off the bed and stood in front of him, already feeling the anticipation float over her skin.  Her hand reached out to his shirt buttons, but he grabbed it before he could touch him.

“I want you to kneel,” he growled.  Noelle found herself on her knees after a beat, biting her lip to keep the strangled groans that threatened to float from her throat.  Tom never became this authoritative, but she knew with the adrenaline that was pumping in his body, that tonight he would let his inner Loki loose.

One of his eyebrows raised and Noelle shuddered under his gaze, “Show me how you would pleasure your new leader and said ruler of Earth.” Noelle’s hands shook as she undid his belt, then unbuttoning his pants which were already straining against his erection. As she slid the silver fabric down, her hand wrapped around him, prompting another long groan from Tom’s mouth.  Her eyes raised up to his, finding a slightly dazed look before she ran her tongue from the tip to the base and back again.  In her periphery she could see his hand fist in a ball and she smirked against his skin.

“Like this, my King?” she murmured and before he answered her mouth went around him, her tongue roaming back and forth with languid strokes over that most sensitive area.  Tom let out a gasp as Noelle balanced on her knees while his hips moved along with her mouth.  When her hand began to caress the skin her mouth could not reach, Tom’s hand buried in her hair followed by another long moan.

“Oh, God, y-yes…that’s it,” he hissed.  Noelle sped up her actions, her tongue moving around before he pulled away from her with a slight pop.  She caught her breath, just in time to be brought up on her feet as he dipped to her face.

His own breath coming in spurts, he murmured, “Good girl. Now on the bed.” With a slight smirk at her received success she turned, only to be smacked hard in the bottom. Her hair flipped around as her mouth gaped open only to have him right in her face again.

“Not too confident my dear, let’s remember who’s in charge.” With that he pushed her onto the bed and seemingly was everywhere on her.  His hands grazed over her arms and neck, his mouth on hers before trailing to her collarbone and onto her breasts, while his hips ground into hers, their skin touching but not joining to only tease her nub.

Every time they made contact, Noelle gasped until she felt on the edge already.  The entire night had been full of watching Tom as she’d never seen him before and with him in control of her she felt ready to fall apart. Sensing it, his hand dipped in between her legs, fingers pressed inside of her before she moaned his name.

“Again,” he breathed in her ear and she called out his name before he pressed onto the spots that only he could reach and caress.  With a flick of his finger, she fell apart under him, his mouth firmly placed on one of her breasts, the other hand holding her down to the mattress.

The soaring high she was on remained for only a moment before Tom was between her legs again, stroking his length up and down her slit before he entered her.  Noelle gasped but then tightened her legs around his waist, her skin feeling as if she was on fire with every thrust.  

His teeth grazed against every spot he knew were her weaknesses, the curve of her breasts, the apex at her neck and earlobe.   His breath flowed hot and fast against her cheeks, “I do love how compliant you are, my dear. I think I’ll keep you.”

Noelle moaned before biting so hard on her lip, she felt the rush of blood pulsing across her mouth. Attempting to maintain his rhythm kept her breathless and clinging to his skin.  She could tell some of the groans from Tom’s mouth were from her nails in the skin of his shoulders.  

She caught her breath long enough to whisper, “Then make me kneel and claim me as yours.”  Tom took only one beat before he turned Noelle onto her knees and began to thrust from behind.  Noelle nearly collapsed into the mattress, her fingers buried in the pillows as Tom dug into her hips.  When he ran his long fingers back on her sensitive skin she reached back to pull his face and lips to hers.

“I love you,” she managed before her body tightened from within, every fibre pulled to it’s limit before they all exploded in cascading waves of pleasure.  She was sure everyone in their hotel heard her screaming Tom’s name, and she was quite proud of that fact.  Soon, they all heard her name as his climax followed soon afterwards and they settled against each other on the dampened sheets.

Tom rolled onto his back, gasping for air as Noelle remained on her stomach.  He gasped, “I can’t wait to film Thor 2, I had no idea you’d be so willing to obey my commands.”

Noelle blindly pulled for his chest as he reached out and grabbed her against his body, “Oh, you know I’ll kneel for you whenever you ask, my liege. Just next time, bring the leather.” He curled into her body, vibrating from laughter as Noelle could no longer hold back her giggles.  They kept making each other laugh until neither could breathe and tears had streamed from their cheeks and into their hair.

“Noelle, I love you more than I could have imagined,” he mumbled into her hair as they both settled down. She nodded in agreement, just as sleep finally overtook her body.

* * *

 

Without reaching for her phone, Noelle knew it was only a few hours later as she relished in the warmth from Tom’s body all over her skin.  She leaned over and into him, her leg curling through his as he slept on his side facing her.  Still asleep, his hand glided down her back and over her curves, ending on the crest of her hip.  Noelle’s eyes refused to leave the view of the skies, a dark and foreboding black. She could feel the precipice, the air starting to turn electric as dawn rose.

She shoved an arm into his chest, “Tom. Wake up.”

“Mmm?”

“Come on, wake up.”

“Meh? No, it’s too early, Noelle.”

“You have nerve. Get that lanky butt up before I tickle you.”  He growled into the pillow underneath him as Noelle placed her hands on his naked back, fingers trailing down to his waistline.  With a quick roll he was up, covering his modesty with one hand while trying to steady himself with the other.

“Why in the world are you awake and why does that mean I have to be up as well?”

“Do you trust me?” She asked, rising up on their bed and holding out her hand.  With a wink and a raised eyebrow, she couldn’t help herself from giggling.

Tom shook his head, sleep still grasping onto him while he pulled up his boxers, “Disney references will get me every time. Of course, Noelle.” He grabbed her hand and helped her down as she grabbed his shirt from earlier in the evening and led them to the small patio.

Pulling out one of the chairs, she directed Tom to sit while she slipped into his shirt, inhaling the intoxicating smell of his cologne.  She seated herself on his lap, her head resting in the crook of his neck before his arms wrapped around her.

“Before you ask, yes, I know that we could have done this in bed. But, wait…I promise you, this will be worth it.”  She tilted her head to his face and she felt his assent in his chest.  Even with the cool air surrounding them, the temps were quite warm and neither missed the bottom or top of their clothing.  Tom’s breathing changed and Noelle nearly smacked him awake when she gasped.

It was that moment of the first change of light. A moment when the sun returned to the skies, starting in the far horizon, over the hills and towards the far landscapes. Her body melted into his, resting against the rise and fall of his chest, the echo of his heart through his skin.  They sat in silence as it seemed the skies would burst from oranges and reds streaked across.  The breezes that had been the only sound rustling through the trees were soon joined by the burgeoning sounds of birds. Soon orange changed to a pale yellow, ushering in the blues and pinks until it culminated in a symphony of light and color.

“It’s breathtaking,” he gasped, eyes roaming the skies.

“There are few things in life worth getting out of bed for and this is one of them,” she said, snuggling into his body.  

“Thank you,” he murmured and she smiled against his skin, placing a few kisses along his collarbone.

“I mean it,” his voice stronger than before.

With a long sigh she relented, “I know you do Tom.  And I’m entirely grateful for you too. I’m not going anywhere.” Even with the separation that faced them, even with the road blocks that were to come over the next few months, she knew it was true.  At the end of it all, she would find her way back into his arms, and she knew without question, he would be there and ready for her.


	21. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Epilogue of The Night is Darkest Before the Dawn... Noelle is on 12 Years A Slave when she is face to face with a decision that will change her life dramatically.

Noelle stood in front of a large plastic covered board with hundreds of polaroid photos staring back at her.  She marveled at the fact that the photos did not melt in what had to be the tenth day sweltering blistering heat.  Maybe the reverse should happen—she should melt in front of them.

She left the air conditioning of Steve McQueen’s trailer no less than five minutes earlier.  Unfortunately, that also meant that she dissolved into a puddle in that time frame.  Her skin glowed with perspiration, her clothes clung to her body and her forehead and neck were dripping into her hair.  In short, typical for late June in New Orleans, Louisiana.

 _It’s not the heat it’s the humidity!_ She was going to kick the next person who dared to mention those words.  It was hot, boiling hot and when she wasn’t trying to escape the elements, the insect kingdom appeared willing and able to make her life miserable.  She alternated between fanning herself from the heat or fanning away the bugs.

She tried not to let it bother her as she headed over to the large tables of water and various foods that were set up to keep everyone hydrated and happy on the  _12 Years A Slave_  set.  Having checked the looks once more, she decided on waiting a few minutes before bringing her team to complete touch ups. It took multiple applications throughout every day to keep the looks consistent.  Her eye turned to the group of actors that were congregated under another table in the shade, drinking their water.  Lupita looked good, still a bit fragile after a few days of filming, but enjoying her well deserved afternoon break.  

Noelle grabbed for her mini case that she left near the coolers to search for some blush, when she realized it was not there.  Picking up the tablecloths and searching around the area, she couldn’t imagine how one large silver box could disappear.

Her head raised to one of the craft service attendants, “Did you happen to see a makeup case here?”

He shook his head in the negative, “Naw ma’am, we just placed the coolers down there no more than a few minutes ago. Didn’t see a thing.” He grabbed a towel for his hands while his eyes searched the area, “You may want to ask a few of the actors who were here when we came over.  I think they may have had it with them.”

Noelle felt the heat again, but not from the atmosphere. Without even asking, she knew which actors he spoke about, “Thank you, did you happen to see where those actors went?”

He pointed with a shrug towards the plantation edge, where rows of trees set up a delightful perimeter around the main house.  Of course, they all had hanging branches, with drooping vines that swayed in the dampened breezes.  Noelle marched to that area first, having found her personal items in one of those gorgeous trees the previous day.

“Michael! Benedict! Where the hell are you?” she screamed.  Working as the Director on enough films gave her the confidence to storm through the crowds, and people knew her well enough to stay out of her way.  She scanned back and forth, trying to find the two that ignored that role and continued to stress her to the limits of her patience.  While she scoured the dirt pathways on the side of the grand home, she heard giggling.  

“I swear to God, Benedict Timothy Carlton, I am in no mood for this today! It is far too hot for your stupid antics!” Following the giggles which soon were accompanied by another individual’s high pitched laughter, Noelle could feel herself seconds away from grievously hurting either one of them.

She found them holding back their laughter from behind one of the great Weeping Willows, as they grasped onto the trunk for dear life.  As she rounded them, both men scampered away, but Noelle remained right on their heels.

“I’m sick of it! Both of you have a lot of nerve stealing my supplies!” Ben finally crossed in front of Michael, effectively shielding him as Noelle ran right up into Ben’s chest.  He tried to stretch his hands out, towards Noelle’s shoulders, and she smacked one away while he snickered some more.

“I mean it!” she screamed, her voice carrying forward.  Benedict nodded his head as Michael continued to laugh.

“Okay! Okay, we’ll tell you where it is, we’re sorry, but we had a purpose!”

“What purpose, Benedict? What on Earth is the purpose of stealing my makeup, other than you trying to make me more miserable on this blazing shoot than before!”

Michael retained his massive grin as he poked his head around Ben’s shoulder, “To see you like this, of course!”

Noelle went after Michael with her teeth bared and Benedict grabbed her arms to keep her from tearing off a limb.

“I’ll scratch his eyes out! I can fix it with makeup if I have to!” she screeched as Ben pulled her away from his cackling co-star.

“Noelle, Noelle! Listen to me! It’s on the porch of the mansion, see? Right over there, just follow the back of the house on the wrap-around and it’s on a table.  We’re sorry, we really are!” he gasped as Noelle yanked her arms away from him.

“I don’t want to speak to either of you until this is through, do you understand me? Stay the fuck away from me!” she yelled over her shoulder as she headed for the house. Every curse and swear she could formulate under the intense sun and heat ran thought her mind.  

She climbed the stairs and trod across the floorboards, muttering to herself, “Stupid, infantile idiots! Why did I ever think that working with Ben and Michael would be better this time, they just know how to make my life…” but she trailed off as she found her case on the table, and the figure standing alongside it.

“Tom!” she gasped.  He was wearing a dark collared shirt and jeans and looked entirely hot and uncomfortable, but the smile that passed his lips tore every inconvenience away.

He bounced a bit in his feet, “Hi, Noelle.” She couldn’t wait any longer and ran up to him, throwing her arms around his neck and his laced around her back.  They were both sticky and disgusting, but she ignored it all away to have him there.

She pulled back to look at his face, “Why are you here? I thought you had more filming in Detroit?” His head dipped close to hers before he nudged her nose with his own.

“I have two days off and I realized, like a moron, that we’re in the same country.  It’s a quick flight back and forth.” He trailed off as his hands pulled against the soft cotton of her shirt, “I missed you so much.”

She nodded as she pressed herself against his chest before she placed both her hands on his cheeks and kissed him, hard and with passion.  She missed him more than she could say, more than on the phone and Skype calls and in her text messages. Things had been good during this time and they found ways to manage the separation.  She would have been back in London within the fortnight, the two of them going to Wimbledon and spending some time in France while Tom researched a role before heading to Morocco.  

She pulled away to his laughter, and she swore he was embarrassed, “What is it?” she said with a curious chuckle.

He cleared his throat, “Well, you know working with Tilda is crazy.  She’s this sage godmother who is like a thousand years old and is so smart and empathetic.  She’s perfect in the role of Eve, but that’s beside the point.” He paused before continuing, his one hand in hers, the other firmly placed in his back pocket.

“She and I have been talking a great deal on our downtime and she’s made so much stuff clearer to me in my life.” Noelle nodded along, wondering where this was going. She soon realized it when he blurted out the next words.

“I wanted to ask you to move in with me.” Noelle swore she heard him wrong and shook her head in confusion.  

He smiled with an uncomfortable air as he stuttered, “I-I keep thinking I don’t want us to be apart anymore. I know we’ve been a couple since December, but I’ve known you for almost two years.  I want a home to be our home, and when we finish our work—wherever it finds us—we will always find ourselves there with each other.” 

He shifted in his feet, “Because, you’re my home.”

Noelle remained in dumbfounded silence and realized that Tom took it as a negative as he pulled away.

“No—no, I mean yes! You-you took me off guard!” A breathless gasp passed his lips as he crossed the distance between them once again.  Noelle held onto him as if she never wanted him to leave, the fear rising but then leaving in an instant.

It felt right, more than any of the other decisions she made about him before, maybe even the night she kissed him.  She too, wanted nothing more than to come home to him. In this massive plantation in the heart of the South, she knew, he was her home.  

“You mean it? You really mean it, you’re okay with this? I know I’m dropping it on you and you’re working and—“ She cut off his rambles as she pressed her lips to his and they both sighed in relief.

She mumbled against him as the sweat from their foreheads mingled together, “It’s perfect Tom.  You knew it because you flew here to ask me and I know it because it just feels right.” Unable to hold back her laughter, she looked up at him, feeling terrible that he looked  relieved but entirely miserable in the unrelenting sunshine.

“I think you need to get your British bum out of this heat.  Please tell me you brought a bag?” He tilted his head to the left and she sighed at it’s presence.  

“Good, go back to my hotel room, get changed and showered and wait for me.  You’ll get to shower again when I come back, though, so don’t get too clean.”

His nose scrunched with his cheeky smile, “Of course, Miss Garguilo, whatever you wish.” He inhaled before finishing, “Maybe let Ben off the hook for this, though.  After all, I did ask for his help.”  

Noelle raised an eyebrow, “What about Michael?”

“No, you can continue to hate his guts. I support that decision.” They both laughed, and she pulled him against her waist as they walked off the porch, his bag in one hand as she held her case in the other.  

Striding together towards the filming site, Noelle realized she wasn’t just walking towards her work.  She found a new door to her life that opened right in front of her.  Her chin dropped onto her chest, and she smiled at the fact that she embraced this all head on, without question. She knew it wasn’t in search of security or a decision borne from fear, rather, she could share her life with someone who truly accepted her.  In the end, that balance and love was what mattered most in her world.  


End file.
